Fake Girlfriend

I was surprised to see Cole’s step-dad relatively normal looking. I expected a scruffy, angry man with a beer gut, but instead, I saw a clean cut man with slicked back brown hair and with pale skin only the slightest bit blotchy red. Had I seen him on the street sober, he’d occur to me as a typical business man. The only reason I could tell he was drunk was because of the droop to his eye and the slur in his voice as he cursed out Cole.

“It’s f***ing eleven o’ clock, you damn brat!” he said.

“What the hell you yelling at me for?” Cole snarled back. “You weren’t sleeping. You were drinking, like usual.”

“Don’t mess with me, you damn ungrateful bastard!”

Then with a furious gaze, Cole’s step dad noticed me. Cole looked over, too, and with horror realized the door was open, and there I stood in the threshold. “I told you to stay outside!” he said, slightly angry but more worried.

And then, Cole’s step dad came barreling towards me, mumbling unintelligibly and angrily. I just stood there, frozen and horrified, until I was yanked away from his step dad’s reach. Suddenly I was being pulled by the arm down the hall, Cole guiding me, and a furious drunkard stumbling after us, not too far behind. I heard something hit the wall next to me, and with horror I realized Cole’s step dad was throwing things at us in drunken fury.

Everything passed horrifyingly quickly. I had no time to react. Thank God Cole did most of the reacting for me. We climbed the stairs two at a time to the second floor hallway. As we crossed the hall, a little face peaked out of one of the doors. It was Joy.

“Brother?” she asked, sleepily.

“Joy, lock your door, turn on your music, and go back to sleep, okay?” Cole told her hastily.

“Okay,” she said, quickly closing her door with a click. It was clear this wasn’t the first time Cole had directed her to do this.

We ducked into what I guessed was Cole’s room just as I saw Cole’s step dad stomping up the stairs. Cole slammed the door and locked it. And even though it was locked, he held the knob tightly with his forehead against the door and teeth grinding together. He was shaking as his step dad slammed against the door, swearing loudly. Even after the swears and pounding quieted, he would not let go of the door. His knuckles were white.

He let out a shaky breath. “Sorry you had to see that,” he mumbled.

I think I was shaking worse than he was. Never had I ever been so scared before. Was this how it was like for Cole all the time? Finally, I couldn’t hold it in any more. Tears trickled down my cheeks, and I covered my mouth to muffle the sobs that bubble to the surface—from feeling both before and after the encounter with Cole’s step dad.

Cole spun around and looked at me alarmed. He came towards and observed my face where there was probably a bruise forming for when Caroline slapped me. He touched it lightly. His alarm was doubled. “Did you get hurt? Did he hurt you?” he asked.

I shook my head. I would have told him the bruise was from somewhere else, if I could have made myself move my hand away from my mouth. I was shaken so badly. All I could think of is hos Cole lived like this all the time. I was crying for him.

Bitterness forgotten, Cole pulled me into a hug and held me tightly in his arms, rocking back and forth with his head resting against mine. I pressed my face into his shoulder and cried. I felt ashamed that I should be the one crying, but at the same time, I couldn’t stop the tears.

“You’re okay,” Cole kept murmuring in my ear.

I’m okay? I thought. What about you?

Eventually, I stopped crying, but Cole didn’t let go. His head slid to my shoulder where it rested heavily. He let out a long frustrated and worried breath. “Shit,” he murmured under his breath. “I’m sorry. You shouldn’t have seen that. I’m sorry. Sorry.” He squeezed me tighter and kept apologizing. Finally, he let me go. I looked at him; he wasn’t crying, but he looked absolutely miserable. I touched his black eye carefully, and for a second, he closed his eyes, calming himself with a long breath.

Suddenly, there was Cole’s step dad thumping at the door again, cursing. My fear was renewed, but this time, Cole was composed. “Come on,” he said, quickly. He grabbed my hand and pulled me over to his window, which he opened and climbed through. He stood, squatted down, looking at me expectantly with a hand extended. I took it and climbed through after him. He shut the window, muting his step dad’s swearing.

We stood on the part of the roof that looked over to a dark, leafless forest. The moon drenched everything in a silver-grey light that should have made everything look eerily, but instead, made it beautiful. Cole sat down and slid on the cold, almost icy roof to the very edge so that his legs hung over—a two floor drop below. He pats the space next to him, looking at me without a word. Slowly, I slid on my butt until I was hesitantly sitting on the edge of the roof, too. I was half tempted to look below me, but I decided that would be a bad idea.

“This is crazy,” I mumbled under my breath.

“It’s not as scary when you get used to it,” Cole said.

We sat in silence for a while, appreciating the moonlit scenery.

“Cole,” I said finally, lost in my own thoughts, thinking back to why we were mad at each other in the first place. “I’m glad you didn’t keep that blackmail.” Sure, that really wasn’t important to say with other things at hand at the moment, but I had to say it. Besides, I didn’t want to make Cole uncomfortable with the topic of his step dad.

Cole snickered. “I could’ve never done anything with it, anyways. I wouldn’t have been able to.”

I remembered Kyle saying the same thing. I smiled. “I know. Thanks.”

Cole lay back on his back, staring at the stars. “Mhm,” he said.

I thought for a moment how the wall Cole had built up against me and his friends had seemed to melt the instant he hugged me. I was glad, but I was afraid that it wouldn’t last long if I didn’t clear things up with Cole now. I couldn’t lose him. Not again. “Cole, I’m really sorry,” I said.

He frowned, eyeing me. “For what?”

“For everything. For giving you a hard time when you go through this at home,” I said. “I was a jerk.”

Cole almost looked amused. He turned his head at me. “No, I’m the jerk.”

“But you can hardly be blamed, when your step dad—“

Cole snickered again, but there was a sort of tenseness that fell upon him. “Oh please, don’t go pitying me, now. I don’t want excuses. There are no excuses,” he said. “What I do and how I act is totally my doing, no matter what happens in my house. And I apologize. I shouldn’t have yelled at you. I shouldn’t have pushed you away—it’s seems that’s impossible to do anyways, but I’m sorry for trying to.” He gave a sad smile. “You had every right to break up with me, ‘cos I’m an ass.”

I leaned back on my arms, getting comfortable with sitting on the edge of a roof. My forehead creased. “I didn’t break up with you because you’re an ass—which you can be. I broke up with you because I’m tired of all the lies. I hated not knowing what was real or fake.”

He turned his head towards me with a serious expression and a cocked eyebrow. “So what is real?”

“I wish I knew,” I answered.

Cole chuckled, turning his gaze back to the stars. “Story of my life.”

There was a pause.

“What happened at the ice rink was real,” Cole said abruptly. That the was the first either of us had mentioned the ice rink, and it surprised me.

“I know,” I answered immediately, surprising myself more.

He propped himself up on his elbow, looking at me for a while. I stared back at him, and he sat up. And there, under the stars and bright half-moon, on the roof in the brisk cold, looking out at the bare beautiful woods, our eyes met and were glued to each other. And it was then we kissed.