Lost In The Stereo Sound

Alex's POV:
I woke up the next morning with a throbbing headache laying naked next to a girl I couldn't recognize in my room at Jack's house. Technically, I guess it's their guest room, but I claimed it as mine when Jack and I became practically inseparable. Mrs. Barakat even referred to it as mine, so it stuck.

I didn't remember anything after I returned back to the party. Obviously, I was on the prowl for a one night stand. I got out of bed, and slipped on my clothes without making a sound. I hate to admit it, but I was pretty good at this seeing that I had a decent amount of experience.

I grossed myself out.

Most of last night came flooding back to me the second I started walking downstairs. Goddamn it, I ruined everything. To be honest, I was embarrassed about what had happened when I left Natalie's house. This girl was probably going to avoid me like the plague now. Perfect. And then realized something. I actually cared that she might not talk to me anymore. Previously, I would have brushed it off and moved on. But this was Natalie we were talking about. Not some ordinary girl who puts out too easily.

I walked quietly down the stairs and ran into Jack.

"Dude, we have to leave for an hour," Jack said shoving his dark brown hair out of his eyes.

"Why?" I asked shielding my eyes from the blinding sun.

"Because I don't know who the fuck is in my bed," Jack said grabbing my arm and pulling me outside toward his car.

"How would leaving the house help?" I asked not following Jack's logic.

"Watch a learn," he said getting into his car. I followed. He put the key in the ignition and turned it on. Swiftly, he pulled out of the driveway and stopped in front of his house. He pushed his steering wheel in and the horn blared.

"Fucking stop!" I yelled covering my ears.

"We come back in an hour and I guarantee they're gone," Jack said winking.

I knew where we were headed, Dunkin Donuts, as always our favorite hangover cure. We loitered around DD eating disgusting amounts of donuts and drinking far too much coffee. Finally, we managed to get our fat asses into Jack's car and drive back to his house. We entered the house quietly so as not to disturb the girls if they were still there. Jack and I checked the rooms and they were gone. Thank god.

"Dude," Jack said breaking the silence as we watched mindless tv, procrastinating cleaning up the mess from the party, "don't worry about Natalie." He did that sometimes. It was almost as if he could read my mind in a weird twin way.

"I can't help it," I said with a massive sigh. "I fucked up."

"So you fucked another girl last night," Jack said as if it were no big deal. "Not the first time that's happened. Plus, Natalie seems like the girl that would understand."

"No, she doesn't know about that," I said shaking my head.

"Shit. Then what?" Jack asked making his giant brown eyes even larger.

"I walked her home and before she went in her house, I kissed her. And I know she wanted it because she kissed me back. But then she pushed me away rambling about nothing and went inside without so much as an explanation," I said. Jack looked beyond surprised.

"Are you shitting me?" Jack asked practically screaming. "Dude, has a girl actually ever done that to you?"

"No..." I said thinking about it. "I mean, I've been turned down, but not after making out with them."

"That's what I meant. What did she say before she left?" Jack asked obviously curious.

"She said that she would call me today," I said with a laugh, "Like that will ever happen. She'll probably avoid me."

"Yikes," Jack said putting his feet on my lap.

"Yeah. So basically, Alex had a great fucking night," I said sarcastically.

"So did Jack," he said holding his thumbs up. "Want to call Rian, Zack, Flyzik and Nano over to clean this mess up?"

"It's your house," I said blankly. "Speaking of, when are your parents coming home?"

"Tomorrow," Jack said shrugging. "I don't understand why they trust me."

"Me neither," I laughed.

Jack made a few calls and soon enough the house was bustling with people cleaning. Jack and I, being baby geniuses, told everyone we cleaned this morning at least half of the shit up so it was their responsibility to clean the rest. Did we? We certainly didn't touch shit. Geniuses I tell you.

Natalie's POV:
I woke up to the sound of my mom yelling my name. Luckily for me, I never really got hangovers if I took an advil and chugged a bottle of water before I slept, so I woke up happily. It was nearing one thirty in the afternoon.

"Jesus, Natalie," my mother said sticking her head in my room. "I didn't know you were still sleepng."

"Yeah, I was tired," I said stretching.

"How was your night?" she asked sitting down on my bed. I have to say, we were pretty close seeing that she was twenty when she had me which made her thirty seven.

"Good," I said finding my glasses on my dresser.

"That's it?" she said not believing me.

"Yeah," I said not wanting to go further.

"So, what's the deal with you and that Alex kid?" she said raising an eyebrow.

"Nothing," I said. "He's my friend." At least I think he still is...

"I wasn't aware that friends kissed each other," she said with a smile.

"You really need to get a life, mom. Stop spying on me!" I said throwing a pillow at her and hiding my face in my hands.

"Nat, he's a nice kid," my mom said.

"I know," I said nodding.

"Why don't you date him?" she asked.

"Because... it would be pointless because he and I will be parting ways in the fall," I explained for what seemed like the millionth time. "That's not that far away, mom. It's May."

"I don't know what made you so pessimistic, but it breaks my heart," she said getting up and walking toward my door.

"Sorry, mom," I said.

"Come down soon. I made some french toast," she said with a smile.

I don't know why everyone was telling me that I was pessimistic. I was just logical and realistic. I grabbed my phone and called the first person I thought of.

"Hello?" Alex said loudly over the noise.

"Hey," I said. "Is this a bad time?"

"Who's this?" he said louder.

"Really, Gaskarth?" I said feeling slightly offended he didn't recognize my voice.

"Oh, hey Natalie," he said slowly.

"Where are you?" I asked.

"Hold on," he said muting the call. "Hey," he started again. "I'm at Jacks. The boys are cleaning up from last night. Sorry about that."

"Oh, it's fine," I said. And then it was silent. I heard him sigh.

"Look, you didn't actually have to call me," he said. "I can take a hint."

"What are you saying?" I asked.

"I was hammered last night. You were too. It was stupid," he explained.

"Oh," I said. "Yeah, I mean, it was... yeah." A little part of me felt incredibly sad that he was so willing to brush it off as if it never happened. But the majority of me was thankful.

"I fully understand if you want to avoid me," he said.

"Are you trying to get rid of me, Gaskarth?" I said trying to maintain the sarcastic comments I'd normally say, but on the inside, I felt sad.

"No, no, of course not. I just didn't know what your game plan was about... last night," he said. "I'm ok with whatever."

"How about we are still friends," I said slowly.

"Sounds good to me," he agreed.

"Look, I have to run, but I'll call you later. I'll probably get bored tonight so let's do something," I said.

"Really?" Alex said sounding surprised. "Yeah, that's cool."

"Unless you're busy?" I asked.

"No, it's fine," he said.

"Ok, see you later," I said awkwardly.

"Bye," he said as I hit the END button.

Jesus, the boy acted like we accidentally fucked or something. I walked downstairs and ate my breakfast in silence. Damn.

That night was relatively awkward. Mostly because he brought me to his band's practice which Jack, Rian and Zack were in. His other friends were sitting around drinking beer and playing some sort of card game. Probably Go Fish.

"Shit, Gaskarth," I said after they finished playing one of their songs.

"What?" he asked looking pretty self-conscious.

"You never said you were good," I said from where I was sitting with a very bored Kara and Jack's latest fling, Jessica.

"Well they are signed with this small label," Kara interjected.

"What the fuck?" I said surprised. "Why did you never mention this?"

"I don't know," Alex said looking at his feet.

"Yeah and their new EP is coming out soon," Kara added. "Really, Alex, you could have totally used that to your advantage."

"Shut up," he said turning a light shade of red. Kara rolled her eyes in return.

"Anyone want some Jager?" I said holding up a bottle I found laying around with some empty shot glasses.

A chorus of yes's and no's went up. Alex and Jack both took a shot with me.

"Woman, get me a beer," Rian said from behind the drum kit with a smile to Kara.

"Fuck off," Kara said walking toward the stairs. "Are you guys done yet? I'm bored."

"Yes," Rian said standing up and walking toward an annoyed Kara. He and Kara went upstairs to get some drinks.

"Not to be an ass, but we've got some... stuff... to do," Jack said gesturing Jess. She laughed.

"You're sick," Zack said putting his bass in it's case.

"Yep," Jack said nodding. "Now get out of my fucking house."

"Do you need a ride?" Zack asked Alex. He looked over at me and shook his head no. "Then see you later," he said as he walked out of Jack's basement.

"What time is it?" I asked.

"Almost eleven," Alex said putting his guitar in its case and locking it up.

"Well what do you want to do?" I asked grabbing my bag off the floor and started heading upstairs.

"Let's go downtown," he said with a smile.

"Why?" I asked wrinkling my nose.

"You have to see this place," he said.

"Where?" I asked as I shut Jack's front door behind me.

"Just go where I tell you," Alex said hopping, literally, into my car.

He guided me south for about a half hour before he led me off the highway. I immediately saw water ahead of me and bright lights lining the streets.

"Wow, this is actually really beautiful," I said as we drove down the street that was on the water.

"That's Thames Street for you," Alex said. "Take a left here!" he yelled realizing that we were coming up on another street.

"Where?" I asked not able to see any street coming up because the sidewalks were so crowded.

"South Broadway," he said pointing a mass of people crossing the street. "There should be parking on the left past this block."

I found some public parking and we got out of the car and ventured down Broadway to end of it.

"Do you have a fake?" I asked Alex.

"No, but the guy at the liquor store down the street knows me so I can get some stuff. What do you want?" he asked.

"Some wine would be nice," I said.

"Anything for you," he joked as we walked a block down Thames Street. "I'll be right back."

I watched as Alex went in to the store and picked out a bottle of red wine. He went up to pay for it and proceeded to get into a fight with the man who was working. Yelling a clear, "Fuck off!" Alex walked out of the store slightly red in the face.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"Sorry about that," he said. "It was the guy's brother. Fucking asshole."

"It's fine," I said trying to soothe him.

"No it's not. It's embarrassing," Alex said avoiding my eyes.

"Because I care..." I said grabbing his hand. I knew that would cheer him up and it did. He smiled back at me.

"You're amazing, Natty," he said squeezing my hand.

There were a few benches and one was vacant so we sat down and marveled at the view. A few boats were trolling around slowly and we just watched them.

Alex grabbed my hand lightly rubbed his thumb against the back of it. I pulled it back to my lap. He chuckled and put his arm around me as we sat in comfortable silence. I started to get mildly tired and let my head rest on his shoulder. I could hear his heart beating and his body was warm.

"Natty," he said softly.

"Yeah?" I asked. He didn't respond so I turned my head up to his and he swiftly leaned his head down to kiss me. He cupped my face with his free hand and kissed me quite forcefully. It reminded me of the night before. And just as before, I lost myself in it for a few minutes. Just as it started to get heated, I realized what I was doing. I wanted to stop, I knew I should stop, but I couldn't. Finally, I pulled my head away.

"Don't do this, Natalie," Alex whispered putting his forehead against mine.

"Alex, you know why I can't," I said playing with my hands.

"I know you feel something," Alex said getting frustrated.

"Can we not do this again?" I pleaded.

"I just don't understand why you'd want to hold back," Alex said crossing his arms.

"I don't want to hurt you," I blurted out.

"And how would that work out? Do you see me as some fragile little boy?" Alex asked scooting away from me.

"No," I said. "I just can't see myself with anyone longer than the end of summer."

"And why would that be bad?" Alex asked looking at me. His brown eyes were sad.

"Because I want you in my life," I tried explaining. "You're too good of a friend for me to lose."

"What makes you so sure you would?"

"You will go on tour and I'll go to college. We'll try to make things work, but one of us will inevitably forget about the other for a second and fuck up," I said. "And then there will be bitterness that will divide us forever."

"Everything doesn't end badly," Alex said quietly. "I understand, but you can't know for sure what will happen."

"Can we just live out the time we have together without all of this to think about?" I asked.

"Alright," he agreed standing up. "We should go. It's almost one."

"Ok," I said standing up too. We started walking back to where I parked and I could feel the tension building as we continued to walk. "Alex, I'm sorry."

"It's fine," he said. "I get it."

"Promise?" I said stopping. Alex turned to face me and a smile spread across his face.

"Yes," he said pulling me into a hug. "I don't like it, but it's fine."

"Alright," I said.

"Can you believe that we're graduating in four weeks?" Alex asked.

My stomach fell realizing the cold truth. I hit me in the face. I hadn't really prepared myself for this. It felt so strange.

"No," I said softly.

"Where are you going?" Alex asked meaning my choice of college as we started to drive home.

"UCLA," I said realizing that I'd be far from Alex even when he was home. Jesus, why did I care this much?

"Oh," Alex said quietly.

I told myself I wouldn't do this to me or the person it involved, but I couldn't control it this time. I felt tears form in my eyes and I quickly blinked them away. I had known this kid for a week and I was practically crying just thinking about being away from him. This was so unlike me, it was scary. I was always the girl that could handle emotionless relationships and deal with separation. For the life of me, I couldn't figure out how to stop myself from feeling this way about Alex. The part of me that wanted to mask this was getting smaller by the second.

"Don't worry, Natty," he said looking at me. His eyes killed me. "I'll visit when we tour."

All I could do was smile. I knew if I opened my mouth, I'd say something I'd regret. Let me get through this year without ruining everything I silently begged myself. Please.