Betrayed

In My Dreams It's Me And You.

I woke up the next morning, my head throbbing. I pushed the blankets off and sat up. My dreams from last night came flooding back to me. I dreamt of Brian... My dream was completely the opposite of the reality. There was no abuse... not even any sex. It kept repeating in my head... Mocking me. Showing me over and over what I could never have.

I shook my head and stood up. Hopefully my morning routine would be distracting enough to make me forget my dream.

After showering and getting dressed, I sat down at my kitchen table with a cup of coffee. I swallowed a couple aspirin before checking my watch and chugging the rest of my coffee. I made sure my tie was straight, grabbed my briefcase and left for another day of work. And what would come afterwards...

Walking into my cubicle, I stopped dead in my tracks.

Brian was leaning against my desk, casually picking at his fingernails.

“Oh, good morning Zacky.” He said, smirking.

I didn't reply, but looked away and set my briefcase down on my desk.

Chuckling, he stood up and stepped over to me.

He grabbed my tie and pulled my against him, his hot breath on my ear making me squirm. I immediately regretted that, because I knew it was exactly what he wanted.

“I'll see you after work.” He whispered, flicking his tongue across my earlobe before leaving me alone in my cubicle.

I didn't get any work done the whole day. I couldn't think about anything else but him.

I Feel It Burn Inside...

It was driving me fucking crazy. And not to mention the fact that I was looking at the clock every five seconds, counting down the time to when work would end.

All the while fighting with myself on the inside. I just can't fucking figure out how I fell in love with him. How could I love something like that? There must be something wrong with me... There has to be.

There's nothing wrong with me...

I just...don't...know.

All I know...is that I am in love with Brian. I don't know how... Or why.

It just happened.

I don't even know how this whole thing with me and Brian started.
I don't know why I let him do this.

Why didn't I just stop him the first time he did it?

”Because you fucking like it.”

“Oh god.” I can hear his voice in my head.

”You fucking love it, you little whore.”

“NO!” I shouted, banging my head against the desk. I hoped the people in the other cubicles just assumed I was frustrated because my computer wasn't working or something.

Luckily, no one came around or asked any questions. I looked at the clock.

Work is over.

I slowly got up and grabbed my briefcase. Right before I left my cubicle, I remembered the gun in my bottom desk drawer. All workers are required to have one as a safety measure. I quickly opened it and tucked the gun in my pants, covering it with my shirt.

“How was work, Zacky?” The sound of his voice made my skin crawl.

I didn't answer again. He roughly grabbed my arm and pulled me to his office.

Once inside, he slammed me against the wall, making me drop my briefcase.

Pressing his body against me, he took control of my mouth with his own.

“Fuck.” I mumbled, pushing him off.

He slapped me like he did yesterday.

“I guess you didn't learn your lesson, did you?” He growled, pushing me down to the ground and sitting on top of me with his legs on either side of my stomach.

He grabbed my hair and pulled my face up to his. He smirked at the horrified look in my eyes.

“You're bringing this upon yourself, Zacky. I wouldn't have to hurt you if you would just be a good little bitch.”

“Fuck you.”

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me.”

He let go of my hair and punch me on the jaw. The same spot he had yesterday.

“Oww fuck!” I cried out, holding my jaw. I kicked him off of me and stood up, pulling the gun out of my pants. Before I even knew what I was doing, I pulled the trigger, and suddenly there was a red stain on Brian's white shirt.

Now it was his face that bore the horrified look. He touched his chest and pulled his hand back, staring, dumbstruck at his own blood dripping from his hand. He fell to his knee's, grabbing my shirt and pulling me down with him.

All Your Power Crumbles In My Arms.

I held him there, watching him bleed to death. He looked up at me, a mix of hatred, regret, and sorrow in his eyes. I stared back, emotionless. As the last of his blood poured out onto the floor, I watched the light leave his eyes, and he took his last breath.

I rolled him out of my lap, his lifeless body making a thunking noise as it hit the floor.

I stared at him for a while, not quite sure what to make of the situation.

I was half in shock, and half completely emotionless.

Then I started laughing. I looked back on all the pain he caused me. And then looked at him laying in front of me in a pool of his own blood.

I stopped suddenly. Then I remembered....how much I loved him. How much pleasure he had given me. That look in his eyes before he died.

Everything that had just happened had finally fully sunk in.

“Oh...shit...”

Now Don't You Realize What You've Done?

I reached out a hand, touching the blood that had poured from his body.

I stared at it, feeling a tear run down my cheek.

“Oh my God...Brian...”

I killed Brian.

I shot him.

I killed the man I loved.

And now...

What now?

I started panicking. What do I do? I can't call the police. They'll know I did it.

I can't go to jail.

“Shit. Shit...shit shit shit!”

I stood up, pacing in circles around Brian's body.
I spotted the gun I had used to kill him.

I stepped forward, slowly picking it up. It was dripping with Brian's blood.

“Brian...”

I held the gun next to my head.

I was shaking. I was afraid to die. I didn't know if it would hurt.

A shot to the head like this should be quick and painless....

Eye's still on Brian, I placed my thumb on the hammer, pulling it down slowly.

I heard the strangely satisfying click, and brought my finger to the trigger.

Tears streaming down my face, I pulled it.

My lifeless body falling down next to Brian's, our blood pooled together to form one puddle.

Finally Together, We Were Destined...