Eventually, Something Has to Give

“Are you ready?”

Removing the spare towel I was using to wash my face with, I glanced up at Garrett’s reflection in the mirror. I nodded quickly whipping my hands off. He disappeared around the bathroom door leaving me to take a second to check my own reflection.

Even after washing my face three times, around my eyes were still red from crying yesterday and this morning. I looked horrible because of it. I hate crying but there wasn’t much I could do about it. I sighed lightly pushing myself away from the basin and out the room.

I made my way slowly down the stairs to where Garrett was standing by the front door. He kindly let me out first before locking the door behind us. As he started walking across his front lawn I bit down on my lip before following. The amount of emotions that ran through my body was on the point of overwhelming.

The strongest emotion that I could feel was how scared I still am. I have never been in control of any situation but trusting Garrett was way out of my hands and comfort zone, I know it will take a long time to get used to it, even so it didn’t change how I felt right now. I trust him and told him what happened.

This all feels so unreal but I know that this isn’t a dream. My dreams are never like this. I took a slow deep breath and glanced over a said guy that I now trust. He looked up at me smiling with his eyes shining happily like they always seemed to be.

“Are you alright?” He asked suddenly, smile faltering. “You seem a little pale...”
“Yeah, just...mind boggled?” I asked more that said.

He showed me a soft smile and held his hand up as if asking if he could hold my hand. Slowly I stretched my hand out to him forcing it not to shake. He has held my hand a few times now, but like I said before I was scared. I feel so pathetic for being so scared.

He wrapped his hand around mine and grinned leading me down the street.

Have I done the right thing this morning?

I think...I think I might have. I think that maybe I need this. I need to trust someone, to have a friend, to have someone else I can talk to when down and all the rest of that stuff. Maybe I can let Garrett over my fence.

Maybe having a friend is what I need and needed. I’m still scared of getting hurt, but he hasn’t hurt me yet – he saved me; twice as far as I’m concerned and he told me himself that he cared and wants to help me. I think I need someone else to help me, even if it is just to hold my hand.

Jared might be right saying that having a friend will help me. I sure hope it will because I feel like I’ve been cracking under the presser over everything in the last few weeks. I’ve said this a few times, but I’m amazed I haven’t lost my mind yet. I guess I am slightly stronger that I give myself credit for.

Slightly lightly I looked up at Garrett again before shifting my gaze to the ground in front of me.

“Thank you, for last night.” I said softly. “And this morning, it’s hard when memories and things flood me suddenly; I’m not good in situations like that...” I trailed off.
“No need to thank me, that’s what friends are for right?” He asked with a smile in his tone.
“I guess.” I chuckled lightly.

He nudged me playfully before swinging our linked arms lightly between us. I couldn’t help but smile softly.

“You know you can come over or ring me anytime you want right?” He asked.

I glanced at him as he smiled.

“If you need me - I’m here; like I said this morning I want to help you...I want to see you smile.” He ended softly.
“I’ll remember that.” I muttered feeling my face flush for some reason.

He chuckled obviously seeing my face brighten in colour. He gave my hand a gentle squeeze before swinging them again. Him doing that reminded me of a kid for some reason. It was cute, but odd for me at the same time – I’m still not really an affectionate person, yet somehow laying next to Garrett and letting him hold me didn’t bother me as so much as what I thought it would, now thinking back on it. It was kind of...nice. Relaxing even.

Our walk continued to be quite after that, but it wasn’t awkward. I mostly started down at the ground moving under my feet while flicking my eyes up now and then to look around us. I don’t even remember any of the walking I did last night between walking across my front lawn to when I stopped at the end of the street Garrett lived on. It was weird not to remember that but at the same time it was understandable because of the amount of flashbacks I was having.

Just thinking about it shoots a picture of me looking down at myself when sitting in the dirt; all muddy, bruised and bleeding. I flinched seeing it and shook my head to get rid of it. Gosh they have terrible timing to show up. I suddenly felt Garrett’s eyes on me but I acted like I didn’t notice. I don’t want to explain that – I’ve said and opened up enough for one day I think.

When I could see my house coming into view I frowned a little and bit my lip lightly. What will happen when I step foot back in there? What happened after I left? What did mum and dad talk about?

“So...what do you think is going to happen?” Garrett asked quietly. “Between your mum and dad?”
“Honestly I have no idea.” I shrugged softly. “I guess it works out two ways: either they split up or we slowly work everything out.”
“I hope it works out for the best.”
“Yeah, I hope so too.”

He nudged my side but in a caring way this time, I couldn’t help the slightest of smiles pull on my lips. Slowly we walked up to the door and stopped for me to find my keys, just as I was checking the pocket I always had them in. I groaned tilting my head back.

Rolling my eyes I knocked on the door as Garrett chuckled behind me. It wasn’t surprising I had forgotten my keys yesterday; I didn’t even take my phone...Fuck I forgot to call Tanner! I looked at Garrett worried and his expression turned confused.

“I forgot to call Tanner where I was, he probably was fr-“
“I called him, not long after you fell asleep.” He grinned.

I let out a breath I didn’t notice I was holding in. Nodding in thanks I turned back to the door just as it was flung open.

“Lara!” Tanner yelled half flinging himself at me.

I smiled catching him, but then blinked confused when I felt another pair of arms wrapped around the both of us. I turned my head to the side when the other person pecked my cheek. Jared grinned at me before stepping back. I smiled back at him before Tan dragged me inside.

“You know it’s a good thing Garrett called last night because I would be kicking your ass to Australia right now.” Tan said stopping to placed his hands on his hips like a pissed off woman.

Both Garrett and Jared started laughing from behind me. I couldn’t help but chucked lightly make Tanner smile relaxing.

“Next time take your phone yeah?” He asked tilting his head to the side.
“Yes mummy.” I grinned.

He rolled his eyes before placing his hand on my lower back guiding me to the kitchen. I walked a little hesitant, not sure who was in there or anything. I shifted my gaze to Tanner; I knew that Tan would understand me with just the look alone.

“Mum will tell you want happened.” He whispered.

I nodded and walked into the kitchen to see her drinking from a glass of water. As she saw us walk in the room she placed the glass down and walked around the table to quickly hug me. I hugged her back gently before letting her pull away. I watched as she sat down at the table like Jared already was. Tanner hopped up and sat on the bench by the sink. I leaned against the sink as Garrett somewhat hovered around Jared and the kitchen door.

“Hello Garrett, long time no see.” Mum smiled.

Garrett grinned waving kindly; it wasn’t surprising she knew him or the others. I may not have been friends with them for that entire long in a way but we all met each other because of Jared just after moving here. Mum then turned to look at me, she suddenly held up something which I recognised was my phone. I gave her a small innocent look making her laugh lightly as she placed it back on the table.

“Remember to take it next time darling.”
“I will mum.” I nodded. “So...um, what happened after I left?” I asked wanting to know.

Nothing else seriously bad could happen right now...right? Like the worst would be mum and dad splitting up and really for me – sad to say- I could live and handle that. It wasn’t like dad was going forever, I’m sure even if they did split up he’d still be around a bit like he is living here.

Out of the corner of my eye I noticed Garrett silently walk out the room, probably to give us space. Though really to me it wouldn’t matter if he was in the room or not.

“Well me and your father talked for a long while about everything, without getting into a fight.” She said before glancing at Tan. “Though we did have a big kid spying on us.” She mocked glared.

Tanner looked at her wide eyed before looked behind him blinking.

“Who?” He asked acting clueless.
“Oh I dunno, some kid that we picked up from the side of the road.” Mum smirked throwing a tea towel at him.

Tan pouted as it skimmed across the top of his head. Most of the people in the room laughed as I smiled.

“So after I don’t know how long taking we sorted it out.” Mum said turning her attention back to me. “Me and your dad are going to...take a break I guess you could say. He’s decided to move out and he is going to quit his job, though really he got fired for not turning up since that fight here.” She sighed.

I nodded to show I was listening. Sounds to me his boss – ex-boss is an asshole to be very blunt.

“He wants to make us a family again, to be in our lives if you’re both willing to have him back.” She said glancing between me and my brother. “It won’t be easy and it will take time of course, that’s why he suggested moving out to give us all space to make it work. He’ll be living in town here, I’m sure only walking distance away.”
“O-ok.” I nodded letting the new info in.

Well it wasn’t that bad really. Dad was actually going to try and fix things, that’s a start right? It was the best thing that could happen in this situation. I doubt I’d be able to trust him for a long time, or trust him fully again like I did when I was little...but if he was willing to try, then I could right?

“At least he’s going to try.” I murmured.
“Yeah.” Tan agreed. “Slow and easy I guess.” He shrugged.

I think he was the same as me with the trust thing, defiantly after what dad said to me that day. Tanner can get pretty protective of me when he had to be, which was nice because it made me feel safe most of the time.

“So are you alright with this Larissa?” She asked worry covering her tone.
“I am, it will take me a long time...but if he’s going to try, then I could. Right?” I asked voicing what I just had thought.
“Right.” Tanner nodded smiling.

Mum smiled up at me very happily along with Jared. I felt my face flush making me look down at my feet. I was actually going to try and let someone else in – slowly, but still I’m going to try. Shaking my head I shoved that same scared feeling that tried bubbling up back into its place.

I felt someone take my hand making me jump lightly. I looked up to see Garrett smiling at me as he leant against the kitchen bench next to me. I gave him a soft smile before turning to see Mum’s confused look and my brother’s happy grins...Though Tanner gave me more of a cheeky smile than anything. If he’s going to tease me about liking Garrett I’ll be the one kicking his ass to Australia.

I looked back up a said boy I was holding hands with.

“Should I tell them that you know?” I breathed just so he could hear.
“If you want to.” He whispered back.

I nodded and looked back out across the room at everyone.

“Um, I have something to tell you all-“
“You and Garry was swapping spit last night?” Tanner asked looking at me wide eyed.

Growling I back handed him in the chest before rolling my eyes as he whined. I didn’t even hit him that hard.

“No dumbass.” I poked my tongue at him.

I took a deep breath squeezing Garrett’s hand more. I felt his thumb run across the top of my hand trying to keep my calm, it worked.

“Garrett knows what happened, I told him this morning.” I said quietly.

Everything in the room when dead silent and I could feel their shocked stares burn into me. I sunk into Garrett’s side all little suddenly every shy and self conscious. He let go of my hand and wrapped his arm around my waist. I sucked in my bottom lip nibbling on it hard.

“Really?” Jared gasped as I nodded.
“I’m so happy for you!” Tanner yelled before he attacked me squeezing his body against mine.

I heard Garrett laughed as both Jared and mum came to make it a group hug with me stuck in the middle. I buried my head into Jared’s shoulder and whined; every much like Tanner normally would. I heard everyone laughing then making me feel like I was going to die in embarrassment.

Slowly everyone but mum pulled away from me. She smiled with slight tears in her eyes with made me worried. Leaning in she kissed my temple softly letting her lips linger there.

“I knew that one day you’d find someone you could trust again, I’m proud of you.” She whispered.

I felt my face heat up again, but this time I smiled holding mum back. Yeah, I’m proud of me too.