Follow Your Bliss

Have you ever been to that fork in the road, when the decision you choose will affect the rest of you life?

I did and I'm sure that I will come across many more in this game of life.

Luckily, the path I chose did not lead me to a downfall, like I predicted it would.

That saying, Face your fears, is what I had to do, which wasn't so scary after all.

This particular path has presently brought me to my new home away from home, which is a big step for me, might I add. I've never been too far from home. I even commuted to school instead of dorming.

I've always been a homebody. Luckily I was blessed with great parents and two brothers.

I graduated with a major in nursing and a minor in fine arts. Then, I continued through grad school and became a family nurse practitioner, which is basically a doctor without all the med school.

Grabbing the last box out of my truck, I locked the doors.

There, I stood, in Manhattan, in from of my new home, well apartment anyway.

I had knots in my stomach and moths bursting to escape.

This would be officially my first time out of the nest.

I have been working at St. Joseph's hospital for the last three years now working with the maternity patients and training to take care of the premature infants.

I had been commuting downtown from my grandparents' apartment in Yonkers, New York and before that my parents home in Connecticut.

I've been painting and developing photography on the side, which is how I was able to save enough money to rent the apartment. That and my grandpa knew the super that owned the building so I got a great deal for the size apartment I was renting.

I felt a jerk from my dog, Logan, letting me know that he was getting impatient standing around waiting.

I greeted the doorman with a polite hello and made my way to the fourth floor, apartment 4D.

I was glad my apartment was the corner one, it's one of the reasons why I chose it. It has a beautiful bay window in the bedroom and a fire escape that I can put a bench on.

The elevator door finally opened. I paused halfway down the hall looking threw my massive amount of keys and key-chains to find the apartment key.

Finally finding it, I tried to continue, but Logan was so kind to walk around me a few times tangling me in his leash.

Needless to say, I was winded and flat on my back.

The box I was carrying was full of CD's, which were now sprawled about me.

Groaning, I opened my eyes and screamed, not expecting another face in front of my own.

The guy jumped back startled by my reaction and quickly responded incased I panicked, "Whoa, not going to hurt you, I swear! I heard you fall and came to see if you needed some help."

Logan was sitting there, wagging his tail happily with his tongue hanging out. Some guard dog he is. Aren't dogs supposed to be man's best friend? And are supposed to be all about protecting their owners?

"It's okay, thanks for coming out here." I smiled and began to untangle the leash from around my legs.

The guy began to pick up my CD's. "Nice collection. Wide variety, but good taste."

"Thanks." I think. Some stranger is going threw my CD's? "Oh my name's Caitlin by the way."

"Ray." He shook my hand.

"Good name, my grandpa's named Ray too." I stared at his big hair. "You seem vaguely familiar, but I don't think I've ever met you before." I shook my head, "Never mind, that must sound crazy."

A faint blush rose in his cheeks, "Umm, it doesn't sound crazy at all." I watched him look through my box of CD's. He grabbed one and held it next to his profile. "Look familiar now?"

I laughed, "Yeah. Good band, My Chemical Romance, I remember when you guys first became big a couple of years ago."

"Thanks." Ray helped me pick up the rest of my CD's and helped me up. "What's your dog's name?"

"Logan." I chuckled. "I'm going to sound like a big freak right now, but I love the comic x-men and Wolverines my favorite so, uh yeah."

"That's awesome, not one bit freakish at all." Ray bent down and let Logan sniff him before petting him. He stood back up and whipped his hands on his pants. "Hey listen, since you now know I'm not some mugger, I just ordered pizza, you want to come over for dinner?"

I chewed my lip debating.

He saw my hesitation. "Come on, you were probably going to order one yourself. It's just my girlfriend and me. And I'll even help with whatever you need getting settled into you're new humble abode."

I smiled bigger and laughed, "Okay you sold me. And I just might take that offer up when the furniture comes this week, but for now there's just an air mattress in there with a shit load of boxes."

"Good, so come on." He took my hand and dragged me towards his apartment, which happened to be across from mine.

"Wait," I laughed at his eagerness. "I have to put this box away and call my mom."

Jokingly, he rolled his eyes and huffed impatiently. "Alright, well you know where I am so just give a knock."

I smiled and nodded. This time I successfully found the apartment key and unlocked the door.

I walked into a bright white bland room. "Ugh, Logan this place needs to be redecorated."

I bent down and took the leash off Logan. He was still a puppy, just turned one. A chocolate lab, one of my favorite breeds too.

$1500 a month was a great deal for what I was getting. Two bedrooms, two bathrooms, a living room/dining room, and a good size open kitchen connected with a huge closet that could be turned into a third bedroom if needed.

And of course that beautiful bay window that I fell in love with. I had officially made it on my own. It only took 24 years, but I did it. And it scared me as hell.

I sat on the counter and took out my cell phone, pushing number two on speed dial.

"Hey boobie, I've been waiting for your phone call." My moms loving voice cooed through the receiver.

"Hi mommy." I smiled to myself. "I did it mommy. I can't believe I've come so far."

"I know baby," I could hear her voice crack as she started crying. "I am so proud of you, never forget that. So how does it feel?"

"Still scary." I admitted. I have never kept anything from her. Not that I could if I wanted to, she always knew me so well. And that's how it's supposed to be. "I fell in the hallway. Whoosh, flat on my back. Just wait 'til Josh and Devin find out; I'll never be able to live it down."

"Should I even ask how?" She laughed. I could just picture her shaking her head.

"Logan walked around me as I was looking through my keys. And when I went to walk again I fell flat on my back and got winded. I was carrying my box of CD's, and you know how many I have, went all over when I went down."

She laughed harder. I've always been a klutz. "You dumb cluck, I keep telling you to get rid of all the unnecessary keys and junk. Tell Logan what a good boy he is."

"Don't praise him. But, because I fell my new neighbor came out and helped me so I'm going to go eat dinner over there. And you'll never guess who it is."

"Caitlin. . ." She said warningly, "You can't just go trusting people. It's not New Fairfield or Yonkers."

"Mom, please give me more credit than that. I'm not stupid you know." I sighed, but then perked up again. "Anyway, it's a guitarist from one of my favorite bands, My Chemical Romance."

"Do I know them?" She asked.

I laughed. "Probably not. There one of the bands that Josh started giving me the name Emo Crack Head for."

"So is he cute?" She asked right away.

I brought my legs on the counter and got comfy. I groaned, "Maaa."

"What? I can ask it's a mother's job you know." I could hear that stupid teasing smile through the phone.

"Well duh he's cute, but he has a girlfriend. And like I'm going to end up with some band guy." I rolled my eyes.

"Well that's too bad. And about ending up with a band guy, is probably more than likely." She said in that mother-all-knowing-voice. You know the one I'm talking about.

I scrunched up my nose. "What on Earth are you getting on about?"

"Well you go to enough concerts and with your brother's thing, it just seems like the most obvious thing." She chuckled softly, but I still heard it. "Besides, you've ruled out almost every other kind of guy there is out there. So it'll be a musician, an artist, or a doctor. My money's on a musician slash artist."

"Thanks mom." I sighed. At least she's never tried to fix me up with anyone lately; oh you should see the things she's done. It's cute how's she's tried, but so annoying after a while. For instance, when we shop, she would choose the cutest guy at the register and force me to pay by myself. Which would be great if you're an extrovert, but me I am horribly shy. And up until college, I was a little more than voluptuous so that didn't help with my confidence.

"Well I'm just telling you like I see it." She laughed. "I'm just teasing you honey."

"See the thing is I know you're not, jackass." I hissed out jackass.

"Jackass." She hissed back.

We both cracked up. "Aright mommy dearest I'm going to head over. I'll talk to dad next time."

"Alright boobie, I love you."

"Love you too mom." I smiled and hung up. I looked at the bulk of keys next to me and took off the apartment key, leaving the rest behind.

"See you in a bit Logan." I called to him. If you dont say goodbye to Logan he'll whine and bark until you come back.

On crossing the hall, after locking up of course, I bumped into this guy. "Oh, sorry."

"No problem," He said shyly and pointed to the door. "Ray's?"

"Yeah," I nodded and he knocked on the door.

I heard all the locks being fiddled with and Ray opened the door.

"Hey Caitlin! Oh, hey Bob, uh meet Caitlin. Caitlin, well meet Bob." He introduced us.

He looked at me suspiciously, but I held his stare just the same. A smile appeared on his lips. "Nice to meet you Caitlin."

"Same here." I smiled genuinely back.

"Right," Ray clapped his hands together and jerked his thumbs over his shoulders. "Christa's got the pizza in the kitchen."

He stepped aside and I followed Bob in. His apartment was basically the same set up as mine, except smaller and at the moment it seemed homier.

Bob went over and greeted who I assume is Christa before grabbing a beer out of the fridge.

"Hey, Christa come meet our new neighbor." Ray shouted over to a pretty looking girl. She had short, dark brown hair and brown eyes.

She stuck out her hand, "Christa, nice to meet cha."

"Caitlin, and same here." I said back shaking her hand.

It wasn't hard to be comfortable around these people, which is shocking for me.

Whenever I asked my friends about their first impression of me, they say that was a sweet girl, but completely shy. And once getting to know me, I'm totally insane, crazy, and random. Sadly there are so many stories to prove them right.

Apparently the band had just come back from Japan so Bob and Ray were retelling stories to Christa and I.

Ray wrapped his arms around Christa's torso when he got back from getting another drink. She had that glowing aura around her; not only that she and I were the ones that stuck to soda instead.

"So, how far along are you?" I asked her. The question was totally random and hearing myself speak it, it sounded slight rude because it was personal.

"Excuse me?" Christa asked and shot Ray a look, who raised his arms in defense. "Um, how did you know I was pregnant?"

"I'm sorry if it was too personal, it's just my job to recognize these sort of things." I apologized.

"Who do you work for?" Bob asked defensively.

"I invite you into my home and here you are getting dirt on us. There's a reason I keep my personal life out of the magazines." Ray said getting angry and stood protectively in front of Christa.

Christa saw the cornered expression on my face and gently put an arm on his shoulder, "Ray, Bob give the kid a chance."

I took this moment to calmly explain myself, "I'm a family nurse practitioner, specializing in the maternity ward and neonatology. That would be the only reason I guessed that she's pregnant, like I said it's my job to know these things."

I had no idea where that boost of confidence came from, but Im glad it did.

"Oh." Ray said sheepishly at a loss of words.

Christa rolled her eyes and slapped the both of them on the back of their heads. "You guys are a bunch of idiots. Caitlin, just ignore them."

"Uh sorry Caitlin, I uh didn't mean to jump to that conclusion it's just that. . ." Ray trailed off; his hands fidgeted nervously occasionally touching his hair.

"Yeah same here." Bob added.

"It's fine, I wouldnt want my life out in the open." I looked at my watch. "I have to get going, Logan needs to go out. I don't want any surprises in my new apartment. But, thank you for dinner, like you said thats probably what I would have been ordering anyway."

Ray walked me to the door and thanked me for coming.

Christa placed the two glasses in the sink, "You guys really are a bunch of idiots. Shes a sweet girl and both just went and attacked her."

"Well what was I supposed to think?" Ray asked.

"You have to admit you were shocked too when she asked." Bob added.

"Yeah, but at least I didn't corner her." She put her hand on her hip. "And, you were both wrong too."

"Well I did offer to help her when the furniture comes and Bob will help too." Ray further tried to climb out of the hole he was digging.

Bob looked up when he heard his name mentioned. "Hey I didnt offer anything that was all you."

"Oh no, you are going that to help him as well." Christa scolded him. "You trapped her too. I still can't believe you guys did that. Whatever, I'm going to go to bed, goodnight Bob."

Christa went into their bedroom for the night shutting the door behind her.

Bob laughed at Ray, "At least I get to go home."