The Hardest Thing

I’m not sure what came over me when I saw Audrey and Kevin together. Of course I was jealous, he managed to get her attention when I was gone, but it was more than that. This guy hurt the love of my life…he put his hands on her and hurt her. I couldn’t forgive that and it was even harder for me to believe that she forgave him. I didn’t want my girl anywhere near that bastard; I was protective of her. No matter how many times Audrey reminded me, I didn’t see it as anything like me being with Laurie. Laurie and I were together before I met Audrey, I didn’t think I had a choice. Audrey needed to stay far away from Kevin and I wanted to make sure that happened. It took everything that I had not to just punch him right there in Starbucks when Audrey tried to kick me out. Then that night when she was in my arms, I knew everything was alright.

---- About a month later

One of my favorite things about having consecutive home games was that it meant waking up next to Audrey. It was even better on a Saturday because she didn’t have to wake up and go to work and school all day and I was able to spend the whole day with her. I kissed her to say “good morning” as my phone rang; it had been a while since my phone rang early in the morning when I was with Audrey, it used to be Laurie calling all the time…it was a reminder that I had another life. Ending things with Laurie was probably the best thing I ever did and seeing Audrey asleep in my bed reminded me of that.

“Hey Dave,” I said to my brother after looking at the caller ID.

“I saw Laurie at the bar last night, when did she get back here?”

“I stopped paying her rent a month ago, so I guess she finally moved back.”

“Just wanted to let you know, bro, I’ll talk to you later.

“Bye.”

I looked over to see Audrey lying awake and looking up at me. I told her that Dave just confirmed that Laurie was back in Winnipeg and would be out of our lives forever. When I said it, I noticed that she tensed up a little; I figured that it was just because she didn’t like to talk about Laurie. Looking at her face made me feeling awful for how badly I hurt her when I thought Laurie was pregnant. I kissed her gently and told her I loved her, it was the only way I could think of to comfort her. When I looked at her after the kiss, I saw that beautiful smile that I loved so much.

“I have a question for you,” I said.

“What’s up?”

“The playoffs start next week and I want you to be at all of my home games.”

“Jon, I never…”

“I know, but I want you there. My parents and Dave are coming and I want you to meet them. More than that, I want you to meet the team…they’re my best friends.”

“For you, I will.”

“What about tonight?”

“What about it?”

“It’s a huge game, we’re playing the Canucks and it’s for first place in the Western Conference. You’re my good luck charm, please come? Kaner’s having a party afterwards too that I want you to come to.”

“It’s been a month and I’m still not used to being your girlfriend in public.”

“I want to show you off,” I responded sitting up so that I was leaning over her.

“Can Kylie come?”

“Of course. One more thing…”

“What?”

“I want you to wear my jersey, after practice, I’ll buy you one that will fit you.”

“Jon…”

“Aud, for me?”

“Anything for you,” she responded putting her arms around my neck and pulling my mouth to hers. God, I loved it when she took control; she forced her tongue into my mouth and I willingly obliged. I climbed on top of her and continued to kiss her; that morning I made love to the girl I would finally be able to show off to my friends and family.

We spent most of the morning just relaxing in bed watching movies. She made me feel less nervous about the game, which was one of the most important of the season. Not only would beating the Canucks put us in first place in the West, but it would put us only two points behind the Caps for the Presidents’ Trophy and there were four more games of regular season. It would be the first time in ten years that trophy was in Chicago and I wanted to be the captain to receive it.

Practice was optional, but I was never able to let myself skip. I left home at 1:45 for the 2:30 practice and Audrey went home. When I got to think rink, Sharpy commented on how much I was smiling; it was a big joke on the team that I didn’t smile enough – no matter how much I hated the name Captain Serious, there were times when I knew why it stuck.

“Aud’s coming to the game tonight,” I told him.

“Are you bringing her to my party?” Kaner piped in.

“Yeah, I think her friend Kylie’s coming too.”

“Is she hot?”

“Is that all you ever think about, Kaner?”

“Hell yeah,” he responded. I hadn’t really been around Kylie that much and when I was, my attention was always on Audrey. She was definitely good looking, she was probably about 5’3, thin, dark hair, maybe hazel eyes, Kaner would probably like her. After practice, I went up to the fan shop and bought an authentic jersey with my name on it in Audrey’s side; it felt weird buying something with my own name on it, but my old jerseys would be too big on her and I wanted her to be comfortable.

When I got home, I immediately stopped at Audrey’s and dropped off the jersey. I think she could tell how excited I was for her to go to the game; she kissed me and told me to go take a nap so I would play my best for her. I remembered that the first game she went to, I played the worst game of my life because I missed her so much.

“Come nap with me?”

“Not today, babe, you need rest, I want to see what all the hype is about you,” she laughed.

“Fine,” I said as I kissed her again and went back home. I was smiling at her comment; after Laurie cared so much about who I was, it was almost refreshing that my girlfriend ignored the hockey world. She still let me talk about it and I knew she was listening to everything, but she didn’t get caught up in who I was to all of the Chicago hockey fans.

I woke up from my nap and had a quick dinner before getting my stuff together and driving back to the rink. I was pumped for this game and for the guys to finally meet the love of my life. Before the game started, it was my job to get the team ready and I just gave them a speech about pride that they all ate up. It wasn’t my best, but this team was ready to win.

During warm ups, I spotted Audrey and Kylie in the crowd and promised myself that I wouldn’t let her distract me, I would just do anything I could to impress her. By the end of the game, I was incredibly proud of myself; I scored a hat trick and assisted Sharpy on another goal. When I was shaking hands with the guys from Vancouver who looked like they were going to kill our audio guys for playing Chelsea Dagger, I looked up and saw a huge smile on Audrey’s face, I couldn’t wait to hug her and thank her for coming to the game. She had told me ahead of time that she didn’t want to come to the locker room, she would just meet me by my car after the game.

The guys were congratulating me on my hat trick and talking about how crazy Kaner’s party was going to be. We had clinched first place in the West and didn’t have another game for two days, so we could go as crazy as we wanted. After talking to the press and changing into my suit, I went as quickly as I could to my car to find my girl. She was standing against the passenger side door and I pushed her up against the car and kissed her until I was out of breath. It wasn’t until I stepped back that I realized Kylie wasn’t with her, “where’s Kylie?”

“She wasn’t feeling well, so she want home.”

Kaner might have been disappointed, but I was sure he would have a ton of other girls at the party, so it wouldn’t be a big deal. Aud and I got in the car and I drove over to Kaner’s place where he and the other guys had already started drinking. I grabbed Aud and myself beers, took her hand and started to introduce her around. Seabs and Sharpy were the first ones to walk over to us.

“So, you must be Audrey,” Sharpy said, “you’re even prettier than Tazer said.”

“Aw, I’m flattered,” she responded.

“She’s definitely better than Laurie,” Seabs added. Audrey made a face showing me that she wasn’t totally comfortable, but she seemed to ease up when the guys started talking about how I played that night and making fun of me. She even joined in the teasing. After talking for a while, she and I both finished our first beers and I went to grab us more, leaving Audrey by herself for a few minutes.

When I got back over to her, I found Kaner feeding her corny pick up lines. I couldn’t believe him; he knew who she was and there were a ton of other pretty girls in there…why did he have to flirt with mine. I walked over and he saw the look in my eyes which just made him flirt more. I was about the deck him when some other girl came over and implied that she would blow him in the corner…he was lucky.

“I’m sorry about Kaner.”

“It’s okay, you warned me about him.”

“I know, I just don’t like seeing other guys with you.”

“Well, you know whose bed I’ll be in at the end of the night,” she said planting a kiss on my lips. Every day I found more reasons to love that girl. As the night went on and we had a few more drinks, she was getting along really well with all of the guys and their girlfriends/wives. She and Nikky Hjalmarsson’s girlfriend got along especially well; I was happy to see her mixing into my life so well. The guys never liked Laurie and they made that pretty clear to me whether it was directly saying something or just making fun of her behind her back.

By the time we left the party, Audrey was pretty drunk and I was feeling pretty good myself. I decided to call a cab because I didn’t think it would be a good idea to drive. The cab dropped us off in front of my condo and I led Audrey inside. I hadn’t seen her drunk before that night and she was exceptionally giggly. She went in my room and was on her knees jumping on my bed talking in baby talk. It was cute in the beginning, but then it started to get a little annoying.

“Jonnnyyyyy,” she started, sounding a little but like my baby cousin, “I have to tell you something.”

“What Aud?” I asked jumping onto the bed next to her. I was laying down and I pulled her on top of me so that our faces were only inches away.

“Laurie’s been texting me,” she said, I almost threw her off of me because I had no idea how I felt about that, “she says that we haven’t seen the last of her.”

“How long as this been going on?”

“For a while, I didn’t wanna tell you, but Jon,” she said, still talking a little bit like a baby.

“What?” her confession had sobered me up and I was little angry; partially at Audrey for not telling me and partially at Laurie for trying to fuck up the best thing in my life.

“I love you.”

“I love you too, Aud, but tell me about Laurie texting you?”

She didn’t answer me, I looked at her on the bed next to me and she had fallen asleep. I never knew that drunk Audrey was just like a child. I didn’t want to wake her, but I knew that I wasn’t going to be able to sleep that night. I tried, but I was too upset and confused; I tried to find Audrey’s phone, but it was in her pocket and she was sleeping on top of that pocket. I should have tried to change her into pajamas, but hanging out with athletes, especially Patrick Kane, I learned never to wake a sleeping drunk.

The next morning, I heard Audrey groaning next to me. “What did I drink last night?” she said.

“A little too much beer,” I responded, “a little bit of a headache?”

She only groaned in response. I told her to go back to sleep after giving her some Advil for the headache. She said that she couldn’t sleep, her head was killing too much.

“Hey Aud,” I whispered, “Do you remember what you told me last night?”

“About what?” she asked.

“Texts from Laurie?”

“Oh shit,” she responded, “I didn’t want you to know about those.”

“What’s she been saying?”

“I don’t know, she doesn’t want us together,” she responded. I wasn’t going to push her anymore because I could tell that she was upset and miserable. I couldn’t believe it though; I looked and she had started to doze back to sleep, so I grabbed my cell phone and went into the other room. I had to call Laurie and ask her about it; I wasn’t sure what she would say to me or even if she would answer. I couldn’t blame the girl for hating me, I did cheat on her and then leave her for the other woman.

“Jon…” she answered the phone.

“Hi Laurie…I just called because I had a question.”

“What?”

“Have you been texting Audrey?”

“Why would I do that?”

“She told me that you were, I just wanted to ask you.”

“Of course not Jon,” she said, “I’m back home now and out of your life like you wanted.”

“Laur…I never…”

“Goodbye Jon,” and with that she hung up the phone. The tone of her voice made me believe that Audrey was right. Laurie sounded both hurt and frustrated, I felt awful, but I knew that I did what was right. I was never being fair to her. Since Audrey was still hung over and half asleep, I decided to call my parents and tell them that they would be meeting her the following week.

They knew that I was seeing someone new, but they didn’t know that I had been with Audrey since October. I wasn’t sure how to tell them that part; Dave knew everything, but he promised not to say anything to my parents. Before calling, I had something for breakfast and contemplated what I would say; finally, I realized I needed to tell them the truth.

“Hey Jon!” my mom was always excited when she answered the phone.

“Hi mom, I just wanted to tell you something…”

“You played so well last night, dad and I are so proud of you.”

“Thanks mom, but I need to talk to you. I told you about the girl, Audrey, that I’ve been dating. You’re going to meet her next week at the first playoff game.”

“Okay?”

“I wanted you to know that I’ve been seeing her since October. I know, I was with Laurie, but Audrey is just so absolutely amazing, you’ll love her.”

My mom didn’t say anything, but I heard another voice in the background…a female voice. Then I realized why I recognized it, Laurie was in my parents’ house. My mom hung up the phone, I guess she was disappointed in me. I had no idea what I was going to do next.