A Tear In Her Dress, John O'Callaghan.

“Sophia, mommy has something to tell you, okay?” I was kneeling down, looking at Sophia.

Sophia nodded, looking up at John, “Okay, mommy. Who is that?”

I bit my lip, “Honey, he’s going to tell you, who he is.” I looked at John then back at Sophia, “But, Soph. Remember mommy loves you.”

John sat down on the grass and looked at Sophia, “Hey there, Sophia.”

Sophia sat down too, “Hi.”

“My name is John,” He looked at her shoes, “I like your shoes, they’re cool looking.” It shocked me at well he was handling the kid thing.

She smiled brightly, “Thanks! My mommy bought them for me as a early birfday present.”

John nodded, “Oh, yeah? That’s cool.” He ran his hand through his hair, “Sophia, do you know who your daddy is?”

I watched Sophia’s happy face turn sad. My heart dropped, she actually looked like she was going to cry, “No. Mommy’s never told me about my daddy.”

“You wanna know why?”

“Why?”

“Because, I’m your daddy.”

Sophia’s face got all confused, “You are?”

John nodded, “Yes, your mommy never told you. Because she wanted to protect you.”

Her eyes widened, “Are you a bad guy?”

He chuckled, “No, Sophia. I’m not a bad guy. I’m just not the right guy for your mommy. She wanted to keep you away from me, so I wouldn’t make you sad about not being here.”

Sophia cocked her head, “Why weren’t you here for all my life?”

John looked up at me, “Because your mommy just told me about you a couple days ago. And I promise, Sophia. That I will try everything to make up for the time I wasn't there. How does that sound?”

Sophia smiled and nodded, “Sounds good!” She got up and wrapped her tiny arms around his neck and buried her head into his shoulder.

John was shocked at this, but hugged her back. It made my eyes water, this was how it was supposed to me. Me, John, and Sophia. Not me, Shane, and Sophia. But, I couldn’t change that. I loved Shane, but Sophia might love John.

I wiped away a tear, “Soph, we gotta go.” I picked her up, “Come on.”

Sophia waved goodbye, “Bye, daddy.”

--

I was sitting in the living room, biting on a pencil. It was weird not having Sophia around, and I was dying to know; what John did with her today. I knew Sophia would fill me in on everything, you told her to keep a secret….she’s do the exact opposite.

They were gone from one in the afternoon all the way till five. Shane was in the kitchen making some lasagna. And I was having a mental panic attack, I kept biting at the pencil hoping she would be home soon.

And then right before the clock hit six, the doorbell rang. I raced to the door and opened it, to find a bright smiley little girl to a happily content man. I nodded, “Thanks.” She ran past me to tell Shane all about her day, “For spending time with her, she’s been looking forward to it, since you told her you would.”

John nodded, “I know. She was telling me. She told me a lot of things.” He looked at his phone, “I’ll get going. I gotta meet the guys at Tim’s house.”

I nodded again, “Okay. Just call when you want to see her again.” I closed the door and sighed. I was feeling so awkward about this. Why, Els? Why? I couldn’t get the fact through that John was actually taking the time to get to know his daughter.

“NOO!”

Sophia’s scream distracted me from my thoughts. I walked into the kitchen to find her in a hissy fit about vegetables. Shane was being gentle but firm with her, “Soph. You have to eat these seven green beans on your plate-“

“I don’t wanna!”

Shane shook his head, “Soph. I made dessert, your favorite. Apple pie-“

“With the crumblies on top?”

Shane smiled and nodded, “Yes, with the crumblies on top.”

Sophia sighed, “Fine.”

-

As I was tucking in Sophia, she was telling me all about her day with John. “He took me to the playground at first, but then he took me to the petting zoo! It was so much fun, mommy. We went to lunch at this really cool place, it had rockets and spaceships and aliens. And then he took me to the place where you can look at all the fishys and sharkies and and the rain forest! It was the best day ever.”

I smiled and nodded, “Sounds like the best day ever.” I kissed her head, “Goodnight, Soph. Shane will be in, in a few minutes. He’s finishing up some work and he’ll be right in.”

Sophia nodded, “Okay…mommy?”

“Hm?” I had braided her long sandy brown hair, she looked like a princess.

“Why aren't you marrying daddy?”

I looked at her and bit my lip, “Because…daddy’s job, he goes away a lot. And it wouldn’t work, and he didn’t stay long enough for me to love him like I do with Shane.”

She nodded, “Oh..i like Shane, but I also like daddy. Will Shane let me see daddy when you guys get married?”

I smiled and nodded, “Of course, honey. Shane loves you and he’s going to do anything to make you happy.”

“Would you guys let me live with him?” Her eyes were wide, as if she didn’t want to ask that question out loud.

I was taken back, why would Sophia want to live with him. She’s only known him for a day, “I don’t know, sweetie. When your older, I guess you could spend the night at his house. But, for now. Lets stick with the spend the days, okay?”

Sophia nodded, “Okay. Can you put in Tom & Jerry, mommy?”

I nodded too and kissed her head, “Of course.” I walked over to her TV and popped in the disk, Sophia could never fall asleep without her Looney Tunes or Tom & Jerry, because she felt like they protected her from the monsters in her room.

I walked down the hall into the bedroom and sighed, “This is going to be a lot harder, than I thought.”

Shane looked up from his desk, “Hm, why do you say that?”

I sat criss crossed on our bed, “Well, I mean. She’s so caught up in him,”

Shane smiled and started writing, “Well, he hasn’t been there for the four years of her life. I’m sure she’s feeling some abandonment.”

I sighed, “I guess. Its just, weird. I mean, John…last time I honestly spoke to him, was that night….” I flopped on my back, “I secretly wished he didn’t care, you know. Cause then, I don’t know.”

Shane got up and kissed my head, “Things will be better this way, for her.” He walked out the room to probably say goodnight to Soph.