You're Living a Lie, You Just Can't Hide From Me

Natalie avoided John at all costs after the "shower encounter." She was ashamed and embarrassed, but mostly disgusted. He had seen more of her than the boy she loved. She clung to Garrett's side, and left him wondering what was going on. He wasn't one to get angered easily, but she didn't think she could tell him that his best friend had seen her naked. It wasn't something that she could easily explain. The redhead just didn't know if she could face the singer yet.

She was embarrassed and shocked. No matter how much she loved Garrett, her body was still attracted to John, and the fact that he'd seen her naked had confused her further. She loved Garrett, but she did think about John from time to time, and now it was even more important that she distanced herself. She was not going to mess things up with the one boy she'd loved for years.

But eventually, she had to when he stopped by her apartment. It had been at least a week since she'd spoken to him, and he had grown concerned. Natalie couldn't help but feel embarrassed and she wasn't really interested in seeing him, but she couldn't avoid it. She considered not answering the door after looking through the peephole and seeing who it was, but she wasn't rude like that. Natalie opened the door and stepped aside wordlessly to let him in. Closing the door behind him, she turned and kept an expectant gaze on the singer.

John ran a hand through his hair. "You know it wasn't intentional."

"I don't care if it was or wasn't." She spoke, wrapping her arms around herself.

"What? Do you want to see me naked? Will that make it even?"

She sighed, shaking her head. "John,"

"Tali, its not that big a deal. Come on, it was an accident." He smiled softly at her as if this was all a joke.

She scoffed.

Natalie wasn't comfortable having this conversation. He was the last person she wanted to be around right now. But she couldn't get over how uncomfortable he made her. It wasn't the feeling Garrett gave her at all. John made her queasy... as if she were on a rollercoaster and was going to throw up.

He towered over her, and always had that signature smirk on his lips. His hazel eyes sparkled, though they weren't anything like Garrett's blue eyes... Yet, no matter how much she tried to deny it, John did have a grand affect on her. Natalie couldn't help but be attracted to him. He was a good looking boy and he had already seen her. Could she be more exposed to him after that?

"Unless," John's hazel eyes widened.

"Unless?" She cocked an eyebrow.

He brought a hand to her hip and ran his hand across it. "You haven't let your boyfriend see as much of you as I have." He moved closer, wrapping his arms around her. "He doesn't know about the Death Cab tattoo on your hipbone..." His breath ghosted across her skin. "Or the fact that you're clean shaven-"

Natalie ripped herself from his arms.

"He hasn't seen as much of you as I have, has he?"

"No." She spoke quietly, her gaze falling to the ground.

John couldn't help but smile to himself. He'd probably gotten further with Natalie than Garrett had. Still, she looked really upset and ashamed at his words. He didn't mean to embarrass or stress her, just to figure out why she was avoiding him. He didn't want to hurt her, he just wanted to prove to her that she had feelings for him. Why else wouldn't she and Garrett have already slept together?

"He wants to take it slow." Natalie spoke quietly. "After everything, he wants me to be able to enjoy..." The girl drifted off.

The taller boy nodded slowly, moving to sit on a couch in the living room. Natalie followed, sitting as far away from him as she could. She stared at her hands in her lap as she tried to figure out how to handle this conversation. This was just an awkward encounter that she didn't know what to do about.

"I know that you love him, Natalie, but it doesn't mean that a part of you doesn't want me."

"I think you're just bitter. You and Garrett have never been remotely into the same girl... He won, and you're upset about it."

John smiled softly, moving closer to the girl. "If you have no feelings for me, then why are you sitting so far away?"

"Because I don't trust you." She spoke quietly. "And Garrett is supposed to come over as soon as he's finished tracking bass for the day. Shouldn't you be at the studio?"

The singer just smiled, moving closer to the girl. "Tals, why don't you trust me?" He spoke hotly. "Is it that you don't trust yourself?"

"He loves me, John." Natalie spoke, moving his hand off of her knee. "And I don't know why, but I am not going to let anything make him not want me anymore."

The singer just twirled a tendril of her hair between his fingers. "I don't know... If I were with you, I would never leave the bedroom. I don't know if its about want."

"He's your best friend, John. Why are you doing this?" Natalie spoke. "I don't want to be the reason that you-"

"The first time I saw you, I knew I needed to have you to myself, Natalie. I want you... more than I've ever wanted anyone else. I tried to stay away, but I can't."

"I think you should go." She spoke, biting her lower lip. "John, don't do this to me."

"Okay. I'll go." He spoke, pressing his lips against her cheek before he stood up and made his way out of the apartment.

Natalie considered John's words as she lay on her bed, letting Jenny Lewis' voice comfort her. The truth was that she did consider going further with John, but that was before she and Garrett became official. Sure, he was really, really goodlooking, but he wasn't Garrett. No one affected her like her boyfriend did. She loved him, and no matter what, she wasn't going to let anything get in the way of that.

She didn't recall falling asleep, but she awoke to Garrett's warm body pressed against hers. He had his arms wrapped protectively around her and had seemingly dosed off. She couldn't tell how long he'd been there, but the Rilo Kiley record had since ended. Natalie smiled, kissing his closed eyelids before he blinked them open.

"Surprise." He spoke sleepily, pulling her closer.

"Pleasant surprise." She answered, pressing her lips to his gently.

Garrett smiled softly, pulling away and looked at her with a steady gaze. He could tell that something was upsetting her, and all he wanted was to help her. He had no idea what she was going through because she had been keeping her distance the past couple of days, but he imagined it had to do with John because she'd been avoiding him like the plague. Garrett wasn't the most perceptive person, but he knew when his girlfriend was not herself.

"Did he do something?" Garrett asked quietly, his fingers trailing over the sliver of skin where her shirt had ridden up.

Natalie's cheeks were as red as her hair, but she said nothing. She bit her lip, trying to figure out how to say what she wanted to. Her silent struggle angered her because she had no idea how to tell him. This was only going to cause problems for the band if she got in the way.

"Is this about... where you stand with him because you chose me?"

She shrugged, inhaling his scent, and letting her eyes drift away from Garrett's teal gaze. "He... he saw me naked."

"WHAT?!" Garrett sounded absolutely shocked.

"H-he walked in on me a couple days ago... in the shower. I thought I locked the door, and I guess I didn't, but h-he..."

"You're embarrassed." The bassist smiled softly. "You're embarrassed because if anyone is supposed to see that much of you, its supposed to be me."

She nodded into the crook of his neck.

Garrett sighed, pulling her lips to his, offering her some comfort. He knew that Natalie was embarrassed, but he didn't blame her. John wanted to see her, so it seemed inevitable. Still, she was humiliated by the singer, and that was something he couldn't stand for.

John couldn't handle the fact that Natalie wasn't interested. He didn't know what he could say to make her feel better. He didn't know what to do, and he didn't really want to fight with John about her. He didn't know what he could do to make things easier on her.

The blue eyed boy was finally getting used to the fact that Natalie loved him back. That he was the one she wanted. But when John was around, he knew he had to mark her as his. John had never had a girl refuse him and Garrett wondered if that was why he wasn't backing down. Natalie was an amazing girl, and John was just bitter.

"Gar, you're the one I want." She whispered. "He came over today and tried to convince me differently, but I would never-"

"Did he do anything?"

She shook her head. "Gary, please. I don't want to cause any trouble for the band-"

"Natalie, baby, its not okay that he continues to disregard our relationship..."

Natalie sighed, sitting up, and straddling Garrett's lap. "It isn't, but I'm over it. I don't want to talk about or think about John, okay? You're the only one I want making me say, 'ohh.'"

"Nat-"

"Garrett," She smiled, sliding his t-shirt over his head and letting her fingers trail over his bare chest.