Oh, I Never Meant to Cause You Trouble

BEEP BEEP BEEP.

The alarm clock sounded noisily at 6 am. I had the hardest time sleeping. I repeatedly smacked the annoying device until it fell to the ground and broke. I didn’t even need this sign to know that it’d be a bad day.

I took a quick shower, letting my slightly wavy hair dry on its own. Picking out tattered jean shorts, a pair of light blue toms and a cashmere boat neck striped pullover, I was out the door with Elle right behind me. Our parents leave for work at the time we get up, so we always miss them just slightly. Today Grant’s Mom let him borrow her car so he offered to give us a ride.

A white Mercedes pulled into our driveway and I gave a small wave.

“Shot gun!” Elle and I turned to each other at the same time.

“I saw the car first, which gives me the upper hand.”

“But I said shotgun!”

“I’m older, just get in the back Ellie,” I ordered, falling into the passenger seat.

“Ready for a second day of this?” Grant asked as he pulled out and onto the road.

“No, I hate it. I need to finish four subject’s worth of homework in study hall.” Elle huffed, falling back into her seat.

“You didn’t even start it,” I mumbled.

“I feel ya Elle- bell, I still have to finish my French.” Grant looked over at me, “which is why I was going to ask your very patient and wise sister for her worksheet?”

I smiled, “Fine. But just this one time! Last year you relied on me way too much. This year- it’s different.” In more ways than one. Oh shut it, Gem.

We made it to St. Ann’s in due time, getting there just as the bus pulled up. Lilly seems to have gotten a ride from Will. Good to know the bus will soon be a thing of the past. Grant and I walked our usual way to my locker, then to French for homeroom.

Walking between Sadie and Val to Graphics, I saw someone who I didn’t really want to see. And I had a sneaking suspicion that he didn’t really want to see me, either.

Zoning out their bickering on what class is better- art or math- I watched him as he tried to look anywhere but me until his eyes latched onto mine. It felt as if I had stuck my fingers in an electrical outlet. A sudden spark went through my body for a brief second then withered away as we passed him.

“Well art doesn’t require much effort.” Sadie grumbled.

“Exactly! That’s why its better.”

I rolled my eyes, “both classes are great, lets just leave it at that.”

“Fine,” they said together as we sat down in our seats. Our estranged teacher, Mrs. Jenkins went on for half the class on how she’s been married to art for twenty years, and that she didn’t need a man. It was very unproductive, but quite entertaining.

Walking by myself to get to Psych, I grimaced as I noticed a sign for Homecoming, which is next Saturday. Dances always end in disaster for me. Freshman year, for homecoming, I went with my boyfriend at the time Ian, who ditched me and then the next day decided to end it because he was having ‘mixed feelings’ which translated to- I found someone else. As a Sophomore I went with friends, but then had to drive everyone home because they drank way too much at Remy’s after party. Junior year I decided not to go, and had to help my Dad with Bank Statements instead.

So this year, I’m hoping it’ll be different. But deep down I know it won’t be, it never is.

---------

“A ham sandwich- thanks Mom,” Grant grumbled as we sat down to lunch. Lilly was already busy chatting away on Homecoming details, since she helps organize the dances.

“So, Gem- do you have your dress yet?” Val leaned in, flashing Grant a shot of her cleavage, most likely on purpose- more street smarts than book smarts.

“Nope not yet.” I stabbed a piece of lettuce with my fork which caused her to jump, “what about you?” I asked with a smile.

“Well, I got two that I can’t decided between. One is strapless and the other-”

“Oh! Idea!” Lilly interrupted, “Gem.”

I mirrored her seriousness, “Yes.”

“We’re going dress shopping Friday.” she nodded quickly, satisfied with her answer.

My mouth was full of salad, “we are?”

“Yes! Of course. Sades you can come too.”

Val crossed her arms, “what about me?”

“Don’t you already have one?” Lilly looked annoyed.

“Yes, two actually,” Val said proudly.

Sadie joined, “then why do you need to go?” she shrugged her shoulders.

Lilly slammed her fists on the table, “Val, do you want to come with us this weekend?”

She thought about it,” Nah, Steven invited me to his lake house.” Lilly threw up her hands in frustration, which Val didn’t seem to notice. As Will tried to calm Lilly down, Val said she had to go meet with her Math teacher and left.

“Good riddance,” Sadie groaned.

“I’m so tired of her!” Lilly complained, “Whatever. Anyways, who are you three going with?”

Sadie became really interested in her orange as we all looked at her. “What is it?” she quipped.

“Well, are you going?” I asked.

She chewed her lip, “I don’t know. I find the dances a tad frivolous.”

Will narrowed his eyes, “frivolous.”

“Yes, it means inappropriately silly.”

“HA!” We all turned to Grant, who stuffed his face with a slice of pizza, “silly.” he echoed.

“Uh, yeah.” I went back to look at Sadie, “well who do you want to go with?” she shrugged her shoulders.

“I’ll play matchmaker!” Lilly clapped her hands.

“Please don’t,” Sadie smiled, “I might go with.. a friend.”

“Well who is this ‘friend’ of yours?” Grant asked.

“You wouldn’t know him.”

“I might, I have an extensive range of friends.”

She squirmed a little from being so heavily interrogated. “I don’t have a date.” I said, taking the attention off of her, which she gladly appreciated.

“Now I don’t believe that.” Will grinned, “You’ve had one for almost every dance you’ve gone to.”

“You can believe it. Maybe I’ll just go with Sadie,” I joked.

As laughter died out, Lilly turned to me, ”Oh! I forgot to ask you. What do you think of the new teach?” Will grumbled something to Grant and they walked to the lunch line.

I took a sip of water and shrugged, “He’s okay.”

“Okay? Just okay? He’s so- HOT!” Lilly yelled loud enough for the table next to us to stare.

“Yeah, I guess so.” I murmured.

“Well its so weird, because yesterday he was all fun and awesome- and today he’s like half here.”

I looked back up at her, “what are you saying?”

“I’m saying that he’s different today. Mr. Bates is kind of weary like he didn’t sleep last night.” Makes two of us.

“Yeah I noticed that too.” Sadie added, “he looked clinically depressed.”

“Hm,” It was hard pretending to sound uninterested, “must just be having an off day.” I decided.

“Maybe he got dumped.” Lilly wondered.

“Or his dog died.” Sadie guessed. We gave her an odd look, “well how am I supposed to know?”

“Oh well,” Lilly sighed, “I guess we’ll never know.” I nodded.

Well I know.

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“Ms. Young- can you please tell me what fiscal leverage is?” Mr. Brock, my freakishly old accounting teacher questioned. Part of the reason I was called on was because I wasn’t really paying attention. I was too busy worrying about my 8th period class. Maybe the only reason he was acting weird was because I had seriously jeopardized his career. Or maybe- he actually misses me.

No, it is most definitely the first one. I feel like such a disease.

“Ms. Young!” Mr. Brock raised his voice, I snapped out of it and sat up straight. “What is fiscal leverage?”

Racking my brain, I played with my pencil, “fiscal leverage is the government’s ability to effect the economy through fiscalist policies?” I answered, a little unsure.

“Very good, Ms. Young. Please keep your head out of the clouds.” he instructed, a few snickers heard from the back. After assigning the homework, the bell sounded. I slowly got up and headed to my locker.

Cutting it dangerously close, I stopped in the bathroom to get a look at myself. Staring at my reflection in the mirror, I splashed some water on my face.

You can do this, Gem.

As I walked out and on my way, the bell rang. “Shit,” I hissed as I jogged to the classroom, only to find the door already closed. Standing outside for a second, I opened it- the creak of the door was the loudest sound ever. Mr. Bates stood at the chalkboard, drawing a diagram, however stopping as everyone turned to stare at me.

“Care to join us, Ms. Young?” he asked sternly. A little hostility is natural.

“Uh, yes. Sorry,” I sat down and looked up at the front. In a few seconds he continued.
“Now before Ms. Young interrupted, we were comparing Dorian Gray to people in this day and age. Lets start with how they’re similar.”

Remy raised her hand, “we’re all happy.” Mr. Bates nodded and begrudgingly wrote ‘happy’ on the board.

“We all have secrets,” Grant called out. You got that right.

A few more students called out answers before I raised my hand.

“Gemma,” he pointed to me before turning back to the board.

“We all love.” He froze for a second and turned back to me with a pitying smile.

“Yes but you forget, Dorian didn’t love anyone or anything.” Asher argued.

“He loved himself,” I stated, on the defensive side. People began to look at each other. Asher turned the chalk around in his hands.

“He may’ve loved the idea of youth, but not particularly himself.” he said finally.

“But he was youth, that was how everyone saw him.”

Mr. Bates shook his head, “That may be cutting it a little too close. Anyone else?”

I could not believe it. If it was his career in danger then why would he argue with me that way?

He gave us an assignment for the last ten minutes of class, letting us talk ‘quietly’. Grant turned around and gave me a teasing look, “he really ripped you apart.”

“I know, right?” I couldn’t help but be angry.

“Maybe you should transfer out of the class,” Grant suggested without thinking. I could, if I wanted to. But then I wouldn’t be able to take AP English, taking it that this was the only teacher who taught that class.

“Yeah, maybe.” I muttered dismissively. I know exactly why he was mad, and I couldn’t act like a victim when I really wasn’t.

“Uh, Gem?”

“Yeah?” I looked up from my paper to see Grant sputtering nervously. “What is it? I asked softly.

“Well since you don’t have anyone to go with and I don’t really want to make a big effort.. Will you go to Homecoming with me?” My stomach dropped and I grinned. “You can say no, but I just wanted to put that out there.” he twisted his hands in a tizzy.

I laughed a little, setting a hand on his to ease his nerves, “Of course I’ll go with you.” He smiled and took a breath, “.. as friends, right?”

“Oh yeah, of course.” Grant agreed. I heard a ruler snap against a desk. We all looked up to Asher- Mr. Bates, with ruler in hand, fuming.

“You seem to abuse the privilege of talking. Since you are all acting as if your in 7th grade again, there will be no talking for the rest of class.”

Afraid that even the slightest eye contact would set him off again, I turned back to read the article on Oscar Wilde’s life, highlighting important points. Had I really just set him off? No one was yelling abnormally loud. I wonder if her heard Grant and I talking, but that’s doubtful. What if he was jealous? Oh seriously Gem, don’t be so vain, it was obviously something else.

The bell rang and we all filed out one by one. I made sure I was in the middle of the pack, there was no way I could say anything to him today.