Don't Waste Your Breath, It's Too Late

With a shaky breath I reached out and touched his cold, pale hand. Tears came to my eyes as I swallowed hard. “Elijah,” I murmured, with soft smile. His light brown eyes connected with mine, his frown turning into a grin that made my heart swell with joy. “You…you’re alive.” I breathed out, “How?”

“What are you talking about, Eliza?” He chuckled, shaking his head. “Of course I’m alive. Now stop playing around and get ready. Mom said we’re leaving soon, and unless you’re ready you’re going to be left.”

I narrowed my eyes and took a step back. What the hell was he talking about? I blinked several times before looking away from him and letting my eyes wander. Much to my surprise I was standing in my old room. I looked around at all the band posters and the unmade, messy bed.

“I-I…what?” I questioned, looking back at him. “This can’t be real! You’re dead, moms dead.” I shook my head, running a hand through my black locks. “I’m going fucking crazy.”

Elijah raised an eyebrow at me with a Haner smirk tugging at his lips. “You’re right, you are going crazy.” He laughed at me before turning away. “Hurry up and get ready, Eliza. I refuse to spend Christmas with dad and everyone without you. That would just be torture.” He called out over his shoulder as he walked out of my room.

We’re spending Christmas with dad and the Avenged family? Elijah and I were only fourteen at the time. Oh my God, what the hell is going on? “MOM!” I shouted, as I darted out of my room and down the stairs. I froze immediately once I reached the living room. I screamed as loud as I possibly could before placing a hand over my mouth. Mom was lying on the couch surrounded by blood with a gun next to her.

“Look what you did.” Elijah spat, walking past me over to her dead body. He studied her for a moment before connecting his eyes with mine. “This is all your fault, Eliza. You might as well have killed her yourself.”

“What? No!” I shook my head. “This isn’t real. Mom didn’t shoot herself.” Tears rolled down my cheeks as I took a few steps back.

“Face it Eliza,” He grinned from ear to ear deviously. “You killed our mother whether you believe it or not, and everyone knows it. They all blame you for it, even dad. He hates you because of it.”

“You’re lying! You’re fucking lying!” I screamed, placing my hands over my ears to drown out his voice, but it didn't work.

Elijah chuckled and shook his head as he walked around mom’s dead body and towards me. “Why did you let me die, Eliza?” He questioned, his voice low.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. I didn’t let you die, Elijah!” I said, shaking my head.

“You didn’t stop me from driving that car. Why, Why didn’t you stop me? I know you wanted too. You knew it wasn’t safe, but you didn’t say a fucking word!” His voice got angrier and lower with every sentence he spoke.

“No! It wasn’t like that! You and Nathan wouldn’t have listened to me anyways! You guys were going to do what every the fuck you wanted, I couldn’t stop you even if I tried!”

“It’s your fault I’m dead, Eliza.” He simply stated, another smirk tugging at his lips. “All your fault.”

“Leave me alone!” I shouted backing further away from him. “It’s not my fault…”

My eyes darted open before sitting straight up in my bed. I swallowed hard and took a deep breath, running a hand through my messy hair.

“Eliza,” Dad called out from the other side of my door. “Are you okay? I heard you screaming?” I was really screaming? Damn.

“I’m fine,” I answered, pushing the covers aside. “I just had a bad dream.” I sighed softly and reached over to turn the small lamp on that sat beside my bed on my nightstand.

“I’m coming in.” He said, pushing open my door.

I rolled my eyes and folded my arms over my chest. “There’s really no need for that. I’m perfectly fine.”

“You were screaming, Eliza so no, you’re not perfectly fine.” He shook his head, walking over to my bed. I could tell her was tired and I had woken him up. I felt a bit bad about that, but not enough to apologize for it.

“Whatever,” I muttered, turning away and looking over at the curtain covered window.

He let out a heavy sigh and sat down on the side of the bed just like he did the night before. “Eliza,” He started.

“Oh no,” I groaned, running a hand over my face. “Why do you keep wanting to talk in the middle of the night? I mean seriously, what is up with you and these middle of the night chats?” I questioned, locking eyes with his.

His facial expression remained the same, but I could tell he was annoyed with me. “I just thought that you would like to that your moms funeral is Thursday.”

“Okay, cool.” I shrugged. What exactly did he want me to say to that?

He shook his head and stood up, obviously fed up with me. “Are you going to school in the morning?” He asked.

“Fuck no,” I answered, leaning back against the headboard.

He nodded, accepting my answer. “Okay,” Was all he said before leaving my room and shutting the door behind him.

Did he honestly think I was going to school after what had happened? After what everybody found out because of that stupid magazine? Fuck no I wasn’t going back. I had plans to stay hidden away in my room for a very long time. But of course, those plans wouldn’t last long with dad and the guys around. Plus, I knew I had a therapy session again with Dr. Russell the following day and moms funeral coming up.

I reach over and turned the lamp off before lying down again. I felt bad that I hadn’t exactly cried much over mom’s death. I felt sort of guilty, like I should be more upset than I am, but I’m not and I can’t figure out why.

--

“Uncle Matt, put me the fuck down!” I shouted, hitting him in the back with my balled up fists.

“You can’t stay in your room forever, Eliza.” He said, carrying me out of my room.

“I hate you,” I hissed, giving up.

He had threatened me and told me that he was going to throw me over his shoulder and carry me all the way downstairs, but did I believe him? No, and that was stupid of me. He didn’t waste anytime following through with his threat and before I knew it he was placing me down on my feet in the living room where all the guys were hanging out. I huffed and ran a hand through my hair, glaring up at him.

“Why the fuck do you insist on me being down here?” I demanded to know.

Matt rolled his eyes and sat down next to Zacky on the couch. “It’s fucking two a clock in the afternoon, Eliza. The guys and I are not allowing you to stay in your room all fucking day.”

“But I don’t want to hang out with you guys all day.” I groaned, looking down at the floor.

“Why don’t you go hang out with that Jayden kid?” Dad asked. “He seemed cool and I don’t mind if you hang around him.”

“No,” I shook my head. “I don’t like that kid. He wants to know too much about me, it makes me feel uncomfortable.”

“What a shame,” Dad muttered, “Well I guess you’ll just have to hang around here for the day until your session.”

I rolled my eyes. “Great, another fucking therapy session.” I fucking hated going to therapy, but not as much as I hated Dr. Russell. I secretly wished someone would kill him so I didn’t have to deal with him.

“Loose the attitude, Eliza. Someday you’ll thank him for everything he’s going to help you through.” Dad said, rolling his own eyes at me. Whatever.

I scoffed and folded my arms over my chest. I would never thank him for anything. He’s not going to be able to help me, especially if I’m not willing to accept it. “He’s not going to help me through anything, dad.” I retorted, rolling my eyes.

“Hey, hey, hey.” Jimmy interrupted us, stepping forward. “There will be no fighting while I’m around.”

“You tell them, Rev.” Zacky chuckled, before sipping on the beer he was holding. I shot him a glare that told him he needed to keep his fucking mouth shut. He ignored it though and childishly stuck his tongue out at me.

“I am so fucking out of here.” I spat before turning on my heel and walking out of the living room. “You’re all immature idiots!” I called out over my shoulder.

“Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Even me?” Jimmy exclaimed, following after me.

I sighed and stopped walking abruptly. “No, Jimmy. You’re not an immature idiot, I promise.” I turned around and gave him a soft smile.

Grinning from ear to ear he stepped forward and wrapped his arms around my body, picking me up off the ground. “I love you, Eliza.” He murmured. Those four simple words he spoke made me smile. It was as if my bad mood was erased completely. That was one thing I loved about Jimmy, he could make me smile and laugh so easily and could make me forget all my problems.

“I love you too, Jimmy.” I laughed and wrapped my arms around his neck.