Forever & Always
Ah! My Unknown Safe Haven
Once I made it out the club, I felt the tears begin to well up. Why does this always happen? Why do I always get stuck with the douche who plays me? Am I so bad of a person that all I deserve is to be played for the rest of my life? I didn't mean to hit the cat when I got my license at 16. I didn't mean to break my mom's camera. I meant to be mean to my sister but I was young. Why should I be punished for these minor mistakes? Why am I being punished through relationships or potential relationships? Why not through my job or college. That would have been a great place for God to punish me. Make me fail a few tests. Make me stress over barely passing would've been way better.
I hadn't realized how far I'd gotten. I didn't even know where I was. I hate being lost. I walked over to a nearby bench surprised my tears were still playing along the rims of my eyes but not pushing out. I sat on the bench and replayed the club scene in my head over and over. Then the thoughts of my ex pertruded through my replay session and I lost it. I covered my face with my hands and just cried and cried. Tear after tear, sob after sob. I just couldn't stop.
After about 15 minutes of continious crying I felt a hand tap my back. I forced a "Get away please" through my sobs but I just felt the person sit beside me and wrap their arms around me. They were to muscular to be Rye's and they for sure weren't Justin's scrawny arms. Who was this kid? And doesn't he understand get away? I felt him pull me over to his chest and although I didn't know this stranger I felt safe in their arms and I just let go again, only this time into this unknown man's chest.
He continued to hold me and rubbed my back and shushed me and whispered it'd be fine. After another 10 or so minutes I pulled myself together and I lifted my head from his chest and looked at the black marks I left on this man's shirt. Crap! I felt so bad because eyeliner was hard to get out. Especially this kind. 'Just buy him a new shirt off the boardwalk'. I went to wipe my eyes when this stranger pushed my hands away from my face and lifted my chin so that we looked eye to eye, and my goodness was it a sight.
I hadn't realized how far I'd gotten. I didn't even know where I was. I hate being lost. I walked over to a nearby bench surprised my tears were still playing along the rims of my eyes but not pushing out. I sat on the bench and replayed the club scene in my head over and over. Then the thoughts of my ex pertruded through my replay session and I lost it. I covered my face with my hands and just cried and cried. Tear after tear, sob after sob. I just couldn't stop.
After about 15 minutes of continious crying I felt a hand tap my back. I forced a "Get away please" through my sobs but I just felt the person sit beside me and wrap their arms around me. They were to muscular to be Rye's and they for sure weren't Justin's scrawny arms. Who was this kid? And doesn't he understand get away? I felt him pull me over to his chest and although I didn't know this stranger I felt safe in their arms and I just let go again, only this time into this unknown man's chest.
He continued to hold me and rubbed my back and shushed me and whispered it'd be fine. After another 10 or so minutes I pulled myself together and I lifted my head from his chest and looked at the black marks I left on this man's shirt. Crap! I felt so bad because eyeliner was hard to get out. Especially this kind. 'Just buy him a new shirt off the boardwalk'. I went to wipe my eyes when this stranger pushed my hands away from my face and lifted my chin so that we looked eye to eye, and my goodness was it a sight.