I'd Rather Be Alone...
Three.
“Hello?”
I could hear my voice vibrate through the phone, the amount of nervousness that could be heard, detected, made me cringe, it’s like I’ve never answered a phone before, which is stupid as most of my life I have depended solely on my mobile.
As I wait for a reply from the other end of the line, I can’t help but think that I should just hang up now, that I should just forget that an international call even tried to get through to me. It’s bound to be something unimportant anyway, or something pointless like a survey from some company I couldn’t really give two thoughts about. The only people who even attempts to phone me from overseas is my family and friends, even then they only call me when I send them a text to say that I was free to talk.
I was just about to give up waiting for a reply and shut off my phone when I heard the familiar voice on the other end of the line, a voice that I haven’t heard in a long time.
“Miss Alexa Jade Carter!” The cheerful Australian voice of the Tour Manager, Gary Ashley, exclaims as the rustling of papers can be heard in the background.
I let the built up sigh escape through my lips as a smile appears once more across my face. I have never felt so relieved to hear Gary’s voice before. I have missed him just as much as the ‘Minor lads, only now do I really know how much.
“Mr. Gary Ashley!” I laugh as he himself laughs lightly at my sudden change of tone. “It’s been a while!”
“Indeed it has, Miss Carter, though rumour has it you’ve done pretty well for yourself since we all last saw you.” He states, a hint of pride could be heard within the laughter.
“Well, I wouldn’t exactly say that I‘ve…” I blush before he cuts me off.
“You were always so modest weren’t you?” He says happily, like he’s talking to a daughter that he never saw more than once a year, in a way.
“No…Um, well…maybe.” I sigh, defeated.
“There‘s nothing wrong with that, be proud of what you‘ve achieved!”
“I know, I know, I learnt that from you.” I laugh again, thinking through the old lessons he used to give me when I worked with him, it‘s what kept our bus journeys that much more insightful when the band were messing about at the back of the huge tour bus.
“I‘m glad that you still remember it.”
“Please, it’ll be a while before I forget that, my brain practically reminds me of those words as soon as I wake up!” I state, matter-of-factly, unable to stop myself from mentioning the band that I had loved so much. “I take it that you’re still managing my five favourite goons.”
“Does it really show in my voice that they‘re still taunting and pranking me everyday?” Gary jokes in a thick, old voice that I could tell he was putting on for effect, causing me to laugh some more as I picture him hunching up so his shoulders were up by his ears.
“I guess you could say that, worse than usual?”
“Unfortunately so, the pranks never seem to stop. They miss you, you know.” Gary murmurs sadly, as if to stop from anyone overhearing him.
I stay quiet for a moment, to let that little statement sink in. It is true that I miss the guys that I spent basically most of my starting career with, but just talking about them to their tour manager, it just makes it seem more real. I take in a deep breath and push that thought from my mind before composing myself and continue the conversation, trying to shift the conversational subject if it was at all possible.
“I miss them to…from time to time.” I chuckle at that slightly before getting back to business. “So, anyway…what do I owe this surprise phone call? You obviously needed to talk to me about something, other than the past. They haven‘t been bad mouthing me have they?”
“Not that I know of, no!” He booms happily, surprised at my random question. “But, yes. I did call you for a better reason other than the past.”
“I thought you would have.” I laugh lightly, relieved to be moving onto business talk. “Right, I’m all ears, what’s on your mind, Big G?”
“I forgot that they told you about that nickname.” He sighs, before continuing in his best business voice. “Anyway, I‘m phoning to ask you a favour, if you don‘t mind.”
“How can you even ask me that? Of course you can, I do owe you a favour, after all that you’ve done for me.” I smile into the receiver, anxious about what he’s about to ask of me.
“I would like to ask you to join the lads again on their four month tour as well as training two other photographers that will be joining us. You‘d really be a big inspiration to them and of course the ‘Minor lads wouldn‘t object to seeing you again!” Gary states confidently, his voice so full of hope that I can’t bear to let him down.
“You know what, Gary?” I say happily before continuing in a genuine tone. “I’d be more than happy to accept your offer! When do I need to be over there?”
“That‘s my girl! Always willing to help me out, when needed! Can you be over here by tomorrow evening?”
“That shouldn’t be a problem at all, I’ll catch an early flight in the morning and be in York for the evening.”
“Many thanks Alexa my dear, I‘ll be sure to keep it quiet from the boys, I think they‘d like to be surprised when you turn up.” He laughs his big, cheerful Australian laugh before going silent. “I have to go, I‘m about to be attacked by Mr. Paul…I shall see you tomorrow evening then my dear.”
“Sure thing Gary, see you then.”
As soon as we both hung up, I couldn’t help but fall against the table beside me, what have I just done? How am I going to tell Petie and Patrick and…everyone?! I have to seriously learn to think about my answers before actually giving them, it’ll save me a lot of trouble.
***
I was still leant against the table, my mind in deep thought and concentration, when the Amely boys returned from lunch. All of them smiling, all of them laughing, all of their expressions changing as they see me standing there, disbelief visible upon my features as I look up at them.
“Alexa? Sweetie, what’s wrong?” Petie asks softly, concern spread across his features as he sidles besides me, wrapping an arm around my shoulders as the other brushes the stray strand of hair out of my face. “What’s happened?”
My mind was still racing, trying it’s hardest to process what had just been said between Gary and myself, the realisation of his words, of his offer…it’s like they’re being etched deeply onto my skull, making me think of nothing else. I still haven’t worked out how I’m going to tell them about the offer that Gary had just given me and just looking up into Petie’s soft gaze is enough to make me shed the tears that had been building up for the past half an hour. Seriously, how can I accept the offer and leave the guys, that have been a huge part of my life for the past two years, to join the ‘Minor lads on tour again?
My gaze turns to Patrick, Brandon and Nate, my arms clutching Petie close to me. I take all of them in, as my mind take me back to the night that I left England to come over here to work with Amely. I certainly don’t want to go through the heartache of saying goodbye again, not after the last time, I’m finally really happy here but how can I say no? I’m not under Amely’s contract anymore…which I don’t think they know anything about.
“Alexi…” Petie urges me softly as he rests his head on top of mine. “Talk to me, please?”
“Yeah, what’s wrong?” Patrick asks nervously, his expression full of concern as he takes a couple of steps towards me and Petie.
“Patrick didn’t break your camera lens, did he?” Nate giggles, in an attempt to make me laugh, as Patrick shoots him a glare that says he’s not amused.
“No, Patrick didn’t break any of my lenses,” I laugh softly as I reluctantly pull away from Petie’s warm grip. “Not that he would anyway!”
“Then what is it?” Petie asks me in a whisper, unable to keep the sadness out of both his eyes and voice.
I take a deep breath and let my hesitation show, as I look down at my feet, resisting every urge in my body to stamp my foot against the polished studio floor.
“The…The manager of the band that I used to work for called while you were at lunch…They want me back for a four month tour, to teach a couple other photographers that will be there as well.” I say quietly, the realisation just starting to kick in about what’s coming next. “That means that I’ll be…leaving.”
I could hear my voice vibrate through the phone, the amount of nervousness that could be heard, detected, made me cringe, it’s like I’ve never answered a phone before, which is stupid as most of my life I have depended solely on my mobile.
As I wait for a reply from the other end of the line, I can’t help but think that I should just hang up now, that I should just forget that an international call even tried to get through to me. It’s bound to be something unimportant anyway, or something pointless like a survey from some company I couldn’t really give two thoughts about. The only people who even attempts to phone me from overseas is my family and friends, even then they only call me when I send them a text to say that I was free to talk.
I was just about to give up waiting for a reply and shut off my phone when I heard the familiar voice on the other end of the line, a voice that I haven’t heard in a long time.
“Miss Alexa Jade Carter!” The cheerful Australian voice of the Tour Manager, Gary Ashley, exclaims as the rustling of papers can be heard in the background.
I let the built up sigh escape through my lips as a smile appears once more across my face. I have never felt so relieved to hear Gary’s voice before. I have missed him just as much as the ‘Minor lads, only now do I really know how much.
“Mr. Gary Ashley!” I laugh as he himself laughs lightly at my sudden change of tone. “It’s been a while!”
“Indeed it has, Miss Carter, though rumour has it you’ve done pretty well for yourself since we all last saw you.” He states, a hint of pride could be heard within the laughter.
“Well, I wouldn’t exactly say that I‘ve…” I blush before he cuts me off.
“You were always so modest weren’t you?” He says happily, like he’s talking to a daughter that he never saw more than once a year, in a way.
“No…Um, well…maybe.” I sigh, defeated.
“There‘s nothing wrong with that, be proud of what you‘ve achieved!”
“I know, I know, I learnt that from you.” I laugh again, thinking through the old lessons he used to give me when I worked with him, it‘s what kept our bus journeys that much more insightful when the band were messing about at the back of the huge tour bus.
“I‘m glad that you still remember it.”
“Please, it’ll be a while before I forget that, my brain practically reminds me of those words as soon as I wake up!” I state, matter-of-factly, unable to stop myself from mentioning the band that I had loved so much. “I take it that you’re still managing my five favourite goons.”
“Does it really show in my voice that they‘re still taunting and pranking me everyday?” Gary jokes in a thick, old voice that I could tell he was putting on for effect, causing me to laugh some more as I picture him hunching up so his shoulders were up by his ears.
“I guess you could say that, worse than usual?”
“Unfortunately so, the pranks never seem to stop. They miss you, you know.” Gary murmurs sadly, as if to stop from anyone overhearing him.
I stay quiet for a moment, to let that little statement sink in. It is true that I miss the guys that I spent basically most of my starting career with, but just talking about them to their tour manager, it just makes it seem more real. I take in a deep breath and push that thought from my mind before composing myself and continue the conversation, trying to shift the conversational subject if it was at all possible.
“I miss them to…from time to time.” I chuckle at that slightly before getting back to business. “So, anyway…what do I owe this surprise phone call? You obviously needed to talk to me about something, other than the past. They haven‘t been bad mouthing me have they?”
“Not that I know of, no!” He booms happily, surprised at my random question. “But, yes. I did call you for a better reason other than the past.”
“I thought you would have.” I laugh lightly, relieved to be moving onto business talk. “Right, I’m all ears, what’s on your mind, Big G?”
“I forgot that they told you about that nickname.” He sighs, before continuing in his best business voice. “Anyway, I‘m phoning to ask you a favour, if you don‘t mind.”
“How can you even ask me that? Of course you can, I do owe you a favour, after all that you’ve done for me.” I smile into the receiver, anxious about what he’s about to ask of me.
“I would like to ask you to join the lads again on their four month tour as well as training two other photographers that will be joining us. You‘d really be a big inspiration to them and of course the ‘Minor lads wouldn‘t object to seeing you again!” Gary states confidently, his voice so full of hope that I can’t bear to let him down.
“You know what, Gary?” I say happily before continuing in a genuine tone. “I’d be more than happy to accept your offer! When do I need to be over there?”
“That‘s my girl! Always willing to help me out, when needed! Can you be over here by tomorrow evening?”
“That shouldn’t be a problem at all, I’ll catch an early flight in the morning and be in York for the evening.”
“Many thanks Alexa my dear, I‘ll be sure to keep it quiet from the boys, I think they‘d like to be surprised when you turn up.” He laughs his big, cheerful Australian laugh before going silent. “I have to go, I‘m about to be attacked by Mr. Paul…I shall see you tomorrow evening then my dear.”
“Sure thing Gary, see you then.”
As soon as we both hung up, I couldn’t help but fall against the table beside me, what have I just done? How am I going to tell Petie and Patrick and…everyone?! I have to seriously learn to think about my answers before actually giving them, it’ll save me a lot of trouble.
***
I was still leant against the table, my mind in deep thought and concentration, when the Amely boys returned from lunch. All of them smiling, all of them laughing, all of their expressions changing as they see me standing there, disbelief visible upon my features as I look up at them.
“Alexa? Sweetie, what’s wrong?” Petie asks softly, concern spread across his features as he sidles besides me, wrapping an arm around my shoulders as the other brushes the stray strand of hair out of my face. “What’s happened?”
My mind was still racing, trying it’s hardest to process what had just been said between Gary and myself, the realisation of his words, of his offer…it’s like they’re being etched deeply onto my skull, making me think of nothing else. I still haven’t worked out how I’m going to tell them about the offer that Gary had just given me and just looking up into Petie’s soft gaze is enough to make me shed the tears that had been building up for the past half an hour. Seriously, how can I accept the offer and leave the guys, that have been a huge part of my life for the past two years, to join the ‘Minor lads on tour again?
My gaze turns to Patrick, Brandon and Nate, my arms clutching Petie close to me. I take all of them in, as my mind take me back to the night that I left England to come over here to work with Amely. I certainly don’t want to go through the heartache of saying goodbye again, not after the last time, I’m finally really happy here but how can I say no? I’m not under Amely’s contract anymore…which I don’t think they know anything about.
“Alexi…” Petie urges me softly as he rests his head on top of mine. “Talk to me, please?”
“Yeah, what’s wrong?” Patrick asks nervously, his expression full of concern as he takes a couple of steps towards me and Petie.
“Patrick didn’t break your camera lens, did he?” Nate giggles, in an attempt to make me laugh, as Patrick shoots him a glare that says he’s not amused.
“No, Patrick didn’t break any of my lenses,” I laugh softly as I reluctantly pull away from Petie’s warm grip. “Not that he would anyway!”
“Then what is it?” Petie asks me in a whisper, unable to keep the sadness out of both his eyes and voice.
I take a deep breath and let my hesitation show, as I look down at my feet, resisting every urge in my body to stamp my foot against the polished studio floor.
“The…The manager of the band that I used to work for called while you were at lunch…They want me back for a four month tour, to teach a couple other photographers that will be there as well.” I say quietly, the realisation just starting to kick in about what’s coming next. “That means that I’ll be…leaving.”