Something Keeps Pulling Me Back

I wake up too see him snuggled against me.
I really like this boy. After 2 years I’ve finally moved on from Gee.
I’m so proud of myself.
I love Gerard but I’ve needed to move on just as he already had.
I feel a rustle, I turn to face Jacob’s beautiful face, and his eyes flutter open.
He goes to kiss me, I allow it.
As much as I feel moving on I stay reserved because somehow I know as many steps forward I take I will always end right back at the begging, but for now I shall just let myself enjoy this self deception of being loved.
“Stop thinking so much.” He groans.
“Bite me!” I retort
He simply smirks and then attacks my neck.
“Jacobbb.” I half squeal half moan.
“Mmmm Frank” He moans back at me.
Wow, I'm acting with him just as I did with Gerard, maybe I do like him a lot, or maybe we are just so close, so close its comfort, and maybe just maybe that’s why I like him.
We stumble out of his bed and walk into the kitchen hand in hand.
He looks at the case of beer.
“I think its beer o’clock again.”
“Fucking oath!” I reply enthusiastically
He cracks open to bottles, I greedily take two and stride of into the lounge room.
“Hey!” He whines behind me, and before he can make it to the lounge room to take it back off me I have polished it off.
“Ha-ha little alcho’ ...“He teases and then kisses my forehead; just like Gerard used too.
He leaves the room and returns with a beer for himself.
“What are we watching?” He asks me.
I shrug my shoulders, “It’s your house...”
He goes through all his movies and then stumbles upon “Chopper”
“Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, oh my goddddd!!” I squeal, ecstatically.
“Chopper it is.” He laughs.
He puts it on and then snuggles next to me.
If this boy is trying to convince me he loves me he’s sure good at it.

About half way through the movie I find myself straddled topless and digging my nails into Jacobs back.
His hands gripped tightly around my throbbing ‘member’.
Our lips colliding, tongues at war, pure lust.
Me being me though I can never let myself have any fun, and make him stop.
“Sorry, I ... just...” He places his finger on my lip.
“Babe you don’t have to explain, its ok”
“Why the fuck are you so god damn sweet!?!”
“Because I think your amazing silly!”
I go red in the face. I really missed having someone make me feel like this... I think I’m really falling, falling hard.
I grab another beer from the kitchen and swig it down, and another.
The reality of getting past Gerard isn’t going well. I don’t want to move on.
I’m so contradictive, one second I just want to move on then next shit about not wanting to...
what is wrong with me?
“What’s wrong Frank?” Jacob asks as he pries the beer from my hand.
“Well, I was just wondering... could I go lie down and have a snuggle?” I coo as cutely as possible.
He just grabs my hand and walks me into his room and then cuddles up to me on his bed.
We sleep for an hour, and both wake up craving a smoke.
“We have none left...” I sob.
“That’s why you’re going to walk and get some” He demands cutely.
“What do I get out of it?” I question.
“I’ll give you anything and everything you want if you just at least try and get me smokes...”
“Hmm I don’t know.” I question smartly, “Anything?”
“Yes!”
I tug at his shirt, “Off” I demand.
He smirks and rips hiss shirt off.
I put my lips.
He begins kissing me.
I snake my hands down him and in one swift movement rip off his belt.
“Oooo...”
I giggle at him.
Eventually we end up in a large make out session his rock hard member grinding against mine.
“What else would you like baby?” He winks.
“Off!” I demand once again but now at his pants.
He does as ordered.
“I like it when you’re bossy...” He says as his jeans a kicked off.
Me being the tease I am. I leave him there, almost entirely naked.
“Ha-ha I got you all excited and now you’re like naked!” I giggle.
He grabs my clothes and basically tears them off me.
“Ha-ha now you are too!”
I pout at him.
He kisses my lips softly.
“Kiss back.” He coos.
I kiss back...
Eventually we are both stripped out of our underwear.
“Mmm what do you want now?” He licks his lips and then nibbles my neck.
“I want you, in me...” I reply sexily.
“Hrmm, are you sure your ready Frank?” He asks concerned.
I don’t answer; I just grab his neck and pull his lips to mine, and then half smile.
Fully knowing I wasn’t completely reading to have sex again I weighed the fact that I probably never would be completely ready again unless it was with Gee, so I just did as I wanted and let Jacob flip me over.
Now, I have heard many, many stories of how big Jacob is. And I have felt it against me and been amazed...but nothing amazed me more then when he entered me.
“Nnnnngggghhh.” I cry out in half pain half lustily.
“Fuck Frankieee, Fuckkk” He bellows in pleasure.
“Jacob, harder!” I moan.
As he thrusts in harder he grabs my throbbing cock and begins pumping me and kissing as my back.
“You’re so fucking beautiful when you moan frank.” He manages to stutter out.
He pulls out and flips me back over so we are face to face.
“I want to get a better view.”
Fuck can he get any sexier?
He lifts me from my back and then enters me.
I bite my lip.
He just watches me as he thrusts hitting my spot my face reacts and as does my voice box and I moan loudly.
He stares adoringly.
But as per usual, I get to a point where I freak out and stop myself from enjoying it...
He notices and collapses on top of me.
“Babe, let yourself enjoy something for once and don’t look into it so much that takes out the fun.”
I agree with him.
But he tries to keep on going.
I just give him what he wants and lie there, and enjoy it.
We eventually return to our pace, except now he has me held in a cuddle as he thrusts.
I fall back into lust.
“J-J-Jacobb...Oh my g-g-g-god!”
He finishes inside me.
And before I can even think it’s over he moves he mouth down to my cock and wraps his lips around it, pumping, sucking and moving his tongue around.
I feel my legs tense, my hold body crumples.
“F-f-fuck!” That’s all that’s heard as I finish off in his mouth
“You’re amazing.” He says as he brings himself up to me and the kisses me on the forehead.
“You are too Ge..Jacob.” Fuck, shit...fuck!
“Don’t worry Frank its fine.”
“Gosh I love you.” I whisper thinking he wouldn’t hear me.
But then he leans in to my ear.
“I love you more then you will ever know, oh and I have great hearing by the way!” He giggles.
I go red in the face.
He just laughs at me.
“No smokes for you!” I tease.
“Fine, I'm perfectly fine with you here.”
“Ha-ha don’t you even try to lie I know your thinking about going to the ash tray and smoking the butts!”
“Shush!”
I grab a pair of Jacobs trackies and get up to walk to the shop.
“Oh go look in the mirror.”
“Why?” I question.
“Just go!”
Too my surprise I see huge welts and slight bleeding on my neck from all his biting.
I smile proudly, I’m his artwork.
As I walk out the door of his house I feel so free, so sexy.
The first time I’ve had sex since Gerard.
It was worth it.