Just Pretend

Why? Just, why? Why would you do this to me, how could you do this to me. I gave you everything. Well, everything I could possibly afford to give you. I gave you my heart, my soul and I was more than willing to give you the rest of my life. I wanted to give you the rest of my life. I wanted so badly to wake up in the morning wrapped in the safety of your arms. I wanted to squint when I opened my eyes because the sun was shining too bright through the drapes we picked out together. I wanted to hear you groan when I pulled the sheet off your body and the cold touched your skin. I wanted to smile. At all the little things you did that got on every single last one of my nerves.

All I wanted was to love you the way I thought you loved me. And now, what am I doing? Sitting in this bed, with my face in my hands, because you brought her here. Up our own stairs, through our own door, into our own bed. And you’re the one who can’t stand to look at me. You have the nerve to sit there and tell me that you’re sorry. I know you are. You’re telling me I don’t understand how you feel, believe me I do. The problem is, I don’t care. I don’t, not one little bit. I don’t care that you love me, I don’t care that you need me, I don’t care that you want to make this work. I don’t.

“I love you with all my heart.” you say.

“I want to be with you forever,” you lie.

“I want you to be my wife,”

“I want you.”

“I need you”

“I’ll miss you..”

Really? Because.

“I don’t care.”