Weapon of Choice

I opened my eyes unwillingly to the annoying ring of my phone. "Hello?" I attempted to say as awake as I could manage.

"Maya?" The Joker said in a badly disguised voice of a woman.

"Speaking."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, who else do you think would have my phone?"

"I don't believe you. You sound like a man."

I looked over at the clock which said it was six in the morning, "I'm a bass this early in the morning. Why are you even calling me?" I yawned.

"It's Friday. You said you'd be here!"

I looked at the phone in a mixture of disgust and anger, "You have to be kidding me..."

"Do I ever kid?" he paused, "Yes! But in this case I'm not. Now get over here!"

I sighed and threw off the covers, "Fine!" I closed the phone and was startled by something hitting the floor. I looked over to see the book, "Oh, I must have read myself to sleep last night," I leaned over and grabbed it, "I wonder how many of these the author sold? It starts out interesting but gets very slow! A man has something precious stolen and will stop at nothing for vengeance. It sounded so good in the summery but now I'm just reading random facts about his life." I snorted and set the book down.

Turning to my closet, I selected a pair of jean shorts that extended to the knee and put on a spaghetti strap beige top with small green flower print, "That'll be good." I left a note for Lisa and silently left the house.

I looked at the cars in the garage, "Now which one is the most normal looking?" One car had my name posted on it and picked up a note, "Enjoy driving my Lexus to the docks. Hopefully it will keep you safe down there."

"Keep me safe?" I inspected the car, "Doesn't seem different to me," I tapped the glass with my finger and gasped, "It's bullet proof!?" I laughed to myself and started the car Hopefully the jokes of me having a sugar daddy won't start... I drove off to my real life, no more glitz and glamor for me.

**************************************************************

I pulled up to the old warehouse. I eased out of the car and stood on the gravel, "Yep, looks the same as I left it." Walking towards the door, I saw something move out of the corner of my eye. I turned my head just in time to see a fleeting shoe rushing to get in the side door, "I wonder if anyone who remembers me is still alive?"

I knocked on the door and was greeted by a large man, "Um...hi, the Joker is expecting me." This guy could be a bouncer... Please don't break me.

He grunted and waved for me to follow. As we walked down the hall he asked me my name.

"Maya Conway..."

He laughed, "I thought it was you. Never guess you'd be working for the Joker."

"We all choose our lives."

He smirked and opened the door to the Joker's office, "Maya, you're here just in time for the show!" The Joker was holding a gun.

I backed up, "Whoa!"

"Maya stand behind me," the man tried grab my arm and drew his gun.

"Get away from me!" I ran behind the door.

"I figured you were a cop the way you volunteered to keep watch over Maya. Pity, you were a good body guard."

"I'm not a-" I heard a bang and a thud on the floor.

"What's going on!?" I shouted from behind the door.

"The police have been sending a few spies over the past weeks. Lucky for me, I can pick them out easily. When I see a cop I always smell bacon, and he reeked of it."

"Great," I stepped over a lifeless arm, "Could you have at least given me a warning or something?"

"I could have..." he looked over as if he heard a voice, "Shut up!"

"Me?"

"No...yes...no..." he seemed frustrated and handed me a few shirts.

I sat down and began to work. The first shirt surprised me, "What did you do?" I slid my hand through the back, "The whole shirt is practically split!"

"Oh that was from the other night. I got in the worst fight with the Batman and he cut me."

I sighed and began sewing again. The other shirts were no better, everything was torn and shredded to the point where I made a mental note to make some new shirts, "Ok, everything is done. Anymore?" I said after an hour.

"Oh yea," he started unbuttoning his shirt.

My eyes widened and I looked at the floor.

I heard him walk up beside me, "Here," the shirt dangled in front of me.

"Thanks," I reached up and grabbed it without looking up.

"After three years I'd think you'd be used to seeing me without my shirt."

"It's just weird to me. You're my boss," I began to sew and poked my finger, "Ugh," I put my finger in my mouth.

"Still poking yourself?" he lowered his head so I could see him.

"It's been a while!" I said in a muffled tone.

He pulled up a chair and sat in front of me, "Let me try!"

"Gladly," I gave him the shirt and needle and watched.

He imitated my movements and ended up jabbing the needle half way through his thumb, "Shit!" he threw the shirt in the air.

I laughed, "See it isn't as easy as you think."

He grunted and stuck his thumb in his mouth, "I knew there was a reason why I never tried this."

I rolled my eyes and looked at him, "You know, I never noticed how many scars you have."

"The one on my back is the worst."

"Really?"

He turned around revealing a twisted scab that ran along the side of his spine.

I gasped, "He did this to you?" Without thinking I lightly ran my finger across the wound. I saw goosebumps pop up and his posture tightened, "Sorry..." my hand flew back to my side.

He turned around, "You don't have to be on pins and needles around me, ya know."

"What do you expect?"

"Well, for you to realize that I won't bite...unless you want me to."

I laughed a little, "Ok, if I ever have the urge for you to bite me then I'll tell you," an awkward silence filled the room, "Where's your shirt?" I looked around.

"Hell if I know."

"It's behind you," I saw the side of the sleeve behind his chair, "Can you hand it to me?"

"No."

I rolled my eyes Typical. He never makes anything easy. "Fine," I got up and used his chair to steady myself so I didn't fall.

Crack!

The chair must have been too weak to hold any more weight because it snapped in half and we both went tumbling to the floor. The Joker landed on his back and I landed sideways on top of him. The Joker wheezed a laugh because I had knocked the wind out of him.

"Sorry!" I repeated trying to get up.

He grabbed my arm, "You need to lighten up. Where's that crazy side of you at?"

I shrugged, "Dormant I guess."

"I'd like to see it again," he pulled my arm towards him.

I smiled nervously, but didn't stop him. I'd wanted this to happen on some subconscious level. Denial had led me to believe that I was only his servant, that I never had feelings for him, but now it was becoming clear. I was finally succumbing to everything inside me that screamed for him.

He kissed me, and my body felt like it was on fire.

His hands wandered up my shirt and my phone rang. Why is my phone ringing? I pulled away reluctantly, and cleared my throat before answering, "Hello?"

"Maya! Maya!" Lisa moaned in pain, "The baby's coming!"