Halfway There

It’s almost like everyone’s getting pregnant — but me. Not that I minded much. I mean, I am fifteen — definitely too young for a kid. Although, Kate’s fifteen … no matter. She’s ready. She’s mature, and she has Sam.

Lucky her.

Not with the Sam part! Ew — I mean, no offense, Kate, but I’m just not into married men — I mean — gahaha! I’m giving myself a headache.

Okay, let me explain better.

Carl, I think, has lost his ever lovin’ mind. He’s practically super-glued to my side! He’s convinced himself that if he leaves me alone, I’ll kill myself. Not that I blame him. I’m having very unstable emotions right now, which could result into suicide. But, anyway, that’s besides the point. The point is that I haven’t gone to the bathroom alone for close to a month now.

My siblings are still living here. I won’t talk to them. All I hear is, “Oh, I wonder if Drew’s okay?” I mean, seriously? Who cares? He’s a backstabbing, woman-abducting, cheating, anger-issue-problem, jerk face!

Okay, that wasn’t one of my better insults.

I suddenly have the need to pee. I think my period is coming, because I’ve had to go almost as much as the two pregnant women in the house! Yeah, that screaming was uncalled for, but I’m PMSing, so back off!

Oh, gosh, I gotta go pee.

No, I can hold it. I know I can, I know I can, I know I …

“I gotta go pee!” I yell out, running toward the nearest bathroom before Carl could catch up with me — thank goodness. I sigh with relief as I do my “business”. Honestly, it felt like a dam was being broken.

“You know, when you gotta go, you gotta go. How do you run so fast?” Carl asks as I walk out. I shrug. “So, you hungry?”

“We ate lunch like half an hour ago. Of course I’m hungry!”

“Great, ’cause I want me some Doritos,” he says, wrapping an arm around my waist to drag me to the kitchen. “What do yah want?”

“Chocolate ice-cream.”

“Now, Emma, that’s unhealthy for you, and it’ll spoil whatever dinner Kate decides to make us. How many scoops?”

“Gimmie three,” I reply back, sitting on the bar stool. “Make it chocolate, with chocolate syrup, and whip cream, and sprinkles, and little Hershey kisses, and —”

“Someone’s expecting a present from the Period Fairy,” Carl says teasingly. “Either that or we now have three pregnant women.”

I stick my tongue out at him. “I’m only fourteen. That, and I haven’t done ‘it’ with anyone. So, we’re in the clear.”

He fake sighs with relief. “Good, because I was beginning to wonder whose kid I was gonna end up takin’ care of.”

“Shut up,” I mumble, shoving his shoulder playfully as he sets my chocolate-and-whip-cream-covered-ice-cream-masterpiece-that-only-Carl-could-get-just-right.

“You know I could take that right back and give it to Ella or Kate.”

“Nah-uh. Mine,” I say, taking a spoon, and shoveling some into my mouth. Ahh, I’m floating on a cloud right this very moment. Mmm.

“So, Emma, I’ve been thinking about this for awhile, and, umm …”

I shovel another spoonful of ice-cream into my mouth as I wait for him to continue.

“You know how I’m really bad with words, but you always seem to know what I’m about to say, so, umm, could you do me a favor, and please understand what I’m trying to ask you.”

I look at him funny. “Sorry, but I don’t have a clue what you’re asking, Carl.”

“Alright, let me try this again. Emma —”

“Emma!” Leah says. Ah, my twin sister who I love to pieces, and the only one of my siblings who I’ll talk to. “Ooh, ice-cream! I want some!”

“No,” I say, sticking my tongue out at her.

“Oh, is your period coming? That would explain your sudden need to pee all the time.”

I sigh with annoyance. Alright, I love her to the death, but she’s as irksome as heck. “Leah, just get to the point of why you’re here.”

“Well, see, I heard —”

“Ahem,” Carl coughs obnoxiously.

“Oops. Sorry, Emma, gonna have to take a rain-check on that gossip. ’Bye Emma; ’bye Carl!” she yells, skipping away.

“Your sister is so weird,” Carl says, staring after her oddly.

“Yeah, I know. Cherry?”

“Mmm, yeah,” he says, taking the cherry from me. “I don’t why you don’t like cherries. It’s just unnatural for a girl to like so many weird foods, yet hate cherries.”

I stick my tongue out at him.

“So, what were you trying to ask before Leah interrupted?” I ask around another bite of ice-cream.

“Uh …” he says awkwardly. “You know, just forget about it. It wasn’t that important, anyway.”

“Eh, alright,” I say, shrugging.

* * *

C’mon, Carl, be a man and ask her! I think.

I have been stressed out of my wits lately. Everything has been happening so quickly! I don’t know how Emma’s been handling it so well.

I’m absolutely scared to death that she’ll try to attempt suicide again, though. I don’t know what I’d do without her. I love her with all my heart. She’s been through so much pain, but she comes through it all as a survivor.

Damn Drew. I should’ve never called him. I just wanted Emma to have a happy birthday — considering how she hates for me to buy her presents with the money we “earned”. She’d always get mad and yell at me, and me being me would yell back at her.

Our relationship is sometimes a miracle in the making.

I have been trying to pop the question to Emma. But every time I get close I think about the other time when I had asked Emma to marry me. Would she say no again? I hope not. I’m head over heels for her — I want to spend the rest of my life with her. But, is she ready? What if she doesn’t feel the same way? What if she doesn’t love me anymore?

Emma was, at the moment being, sleeping on my chest as I watched TV on the couch.

She is the most incredible girl I have ever met.

My mind started wandering to the future, our future. I wonder what our kids will look like? I hope they get Emma’s eyes. She has such pretty eyes. I really love them. If it’s a boy then it’ll be just like me — only not as cool. Or if it’s a girl then it’d be just as pretty as Emma. I’d like that a lot. We should have twins.

I almost made myself laugh. If I knew Emma then that meant it’d be a long time before we had any kids. Even if I could find some way to convince Emma to marry me, then I’d have to wait a long, and I mean long, time for kids.

I’d like for the girl to be a Danielle. Yeah. And we could call her Dani for short. She’d never get married, and be a perfect little virgin forever. We’d name the boy Aiden, and he’d marry a Jenny. Then they’d name their kids after us because we’re the absolutely awesome grandparents.

“Carl,” Emma asks, “what are you thinking so hard about?”

“Dani and Aiden,” I say before my brain catches up with my mouth.

She lifts her head off my chest to give me a funny look. “Who?”

“Uh, nobody.”

“I swear, Carl, that you are the strangest man on Earth.”

I sigh with relief as she falls back asleep on my lap.

Then I felt like smacking myself.

Emma had promised her dad that she wouldn’t marry until she was twenty, at least. I wanted to groan. Twenty was so far away. I don’t think I could wait that long.

Our relationship is seriously a miracle in the works.

And it sucks.