Love in the Dark

The next morning, I got a text from Jonathan saying that he wasn't going to be able to see me until ten in the morning, and that he was sorry. I laughed to myself then replied telling him that it was okay, I understood. I went downstairs and met up with Bruce who was talking with Commissioner Gordon. Walking over to them I smiled, "Hello."

Gordon's cheeks became instantly red, "Uh... g-good morning, Miss. Elwood."

"Bethany please."

"Bethany."

"Hello, Bruce."

"Bethy."

"What's up?"

"We were just talking."

I felt like I was getting the cold shoulder... I hate feeling like I was getting the cold shoulder. Frowning, I looked at Bruce letting him know that I was not happy, and I walked away. Turning the corner, I hugged the wall as I listened to them continue their conversation.

"Are you sure it's safe for her to hang around with Crane," asked Gordon, "Aren't you afraid that something bad is going to happen?"

"I tell her everyday that she needs to be careful... but she insists that Crane is a good guy."

"Do you think the therapy worked then?"

Bruce was silent, "I don't know."

"He wasn't in the program for more than two months.... Not to mention that he still goes to the therapy sessions, arriving on time, fully cooperating.... Maybe he has turned over a new leaf."

"If only it worked on everyone."

"Well, the Joker is a different case all together... hell a different disorder."

"I appreciate you keeping me in the circle, Commissioner. It helps knowing what to do when I know what's going on behind the prison walls."

"Well, I wouldn't tell anyone else, but since you're a Wayne...."

Bruce laughed, "Please don't pull my name card."

"Fine, fine... I won't."

"Are you close to catching the Batman?"

"Batman? No... no closer than when Harvey died."

"Do you want to catch him?"

Gordon was quiet for a moment then said, "No.... Especially not after he pulled Miss. Elwood off of the tower like that. No, I think he is what Gotham needs, whether we want him or not. You?"

"I don't know...."

Both men were quiet then Gordon said, "Well, I better be going. We're moving the Joker back to Arkham today."

"Good luck."

"Thank you."

I heard them walking to the front door, and I went to the kitchen. Why was Jonathan in therapy? Grabbing an apple from the fridge, along with the rest of the blueberries, I went and got a glass preparing it for my orange juice when Bruce came into the kitchen, "What are you thinking about?"

I snapped back to myself, "What?"

"You look distracted." He came over and stood behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist, pulling my back into his strong, strong upper body. I let my head rest against his shoulder, my eyes closed. He swayed, back and forth while we stood like this. Placing his mouth near my ear he whispered, "What are you thinking about?"

"Too many things."

"How are you doing?"

"I don't know." Tears formed along my eyes.

Turning me to face him he held my face in his hands, "You know you can tell me anything, right?"

I nodded, the tears slipping down my face, landing in the palms of his hands, "I just... don't know what to say."

"I'm right here when you need me."

Looking into his eyes I said, "I'm so confused about... everything."

Bruce looked at me, then leaned in and gave me a kiss. I let him, because it wasn't a passionate one. Just one that one friend would give to another. Of course, my mother chose this time to walk into the kitchen. She stopped in the doorway and looked like she was going to have a heart attack, "What on earth is this?"

Bruce and I jumped and quickly put each other on the opposite sides of the kitchen, "Hi mom."

Walking over to me she slapped me, "I thought I raised you to be better than this. Dating someone, then kissing someone else."

"It wasn't what it looked like-"

"Bull shit."

"Margret, it wasn't anything, I promise," said Bruce, "If you're looking to blame anyone, blame me...."

My mom looked at us, huffed then left. I shook my head while I took my breakfast. Going out to the garden, I sat on a bench and cried silently while I bit into my apple. Bruce came out and wrapped an arm around me. I wanted only to be held, so I took it. Bruce rubbed his hand up and down my back, rocking back and forth. I don't think I've ever felt like this before....

"Master Wayne," said Alfred from the garden stairs, "Dr. Crane is here to see Miss. Elwood."

I sat up and wiped my eyes, knowing that I may get rid of the tears that were there now, but not the new ones that were coming. Bruce stood, placing a kiss on top of my head, before turning to Jonathan, "Good morning, Dr. Crane."

"Bruce."

"She's all yours."

"Thank you."

Jonathan's legs came into view as I looked at the ground. Sitting next to me, he didn't touch me. Instead he said, "It's good that you're crying, you know. It lets us know that the hurt is still there... and it helps you get rid of it." I cried a little harder knowing that he was giving me a psychological lecture, "People who go through what you've gone through... they recover differently... handle living regular life differently. You tried to jump back into the swing of things, but you're confused. You don't know how you feel, you feel depressed...."

"Please stop," I said, my voice thick, "I hate crying."

"Everyone does it."

Looking up at him I said, "Do you?"

He looked at me and said, "Yes."

I nodded and looked down at my apple and it's single bite. Bringing it to my mouth, I sighed before taking a bit out of it. I looked out at the garden, and then the vast green hill that the house was built on. Tears filled my eyes again as my lip quivered. This time, Jonathan took my hand and held me close. I swallowed my bite of apple, and rested my head on his shoulder, "I'm sorry that I'm not dressed."

He laughed, "What?"

"I got your text... I should have gotten dressed... but I'm not."

"I think you look cute in your pink shorts with your white tank top. The braids in your hair add all that much more. It's quite a turn on actually."

I laughed half heartily and looked at him, "Oh yeah?"

"Oh yeah."

I smiled wiping my eyes and my face, "I guess that had to happen."

"Yes, next you have to talk about it."

"That won't happen for a while...."

"Take your time. Rushing won't help you grasp what happened."

"You're so smart."

"I have a degree in this, you know."

"I know."

He smiled and placed a kiss on my lips, "By the way, I never got to thank you."

"For what?"

"Staying the night."

I smiled, "Well, if that happens every night I stay, I'll stay more often."

Jonathan smiled now, "Would you like to stay tonight?"

Laughing I said, "We'll see.... If I break down again I don't know if I'll be up to it."

Jonathan's smile faded, "Bethany... if you're suffering, you need to talk to someone."

"Can I talk to you?"

Jonathan kissed my forehead, "Yes."

"I don't know what to say."

"What is the thing, feeling, memory, that is causing you so much pain?"

"There's a few.... When you were pushed off of the tower, and when the Joker...." I had to stop to keep myself from full on sobbing, "When he let go...."

"Was it the falling, or was it actually the feeling of him letting go?"

"Letting go. The falling wasn't that much of a factor."

"How did you feel?"

"Scared.... It was like watching a movie... I knew what was going to happen, but in the back of my mind I hoped that it wasn't going to happen. But once I felt his grip loosen time seemed to slow. I felt each finger let go, and.... then I was falling."

"How did you feel throughout the entire process?"

"Terrified.... I've never been so scared in my life."

"You realize that you're safe now, right?"

"Yes... but sometimes, I can't help but feel like I'm being watched."

"What do you mean?"

"That I'm going to turn the corner and find a man in one of those creepy clown masks.... Can I tell you something?"

"Yes."

"Promise you won't tell anyone else?"

"Bethany-"

"I thought I saw a person standing outside my bedroom doors."

"Doors?"

"The terrace doors."

"Bethany... you've experienced something terrible.... Paranoia is something that comes along with recovering. Just tell yourself that it isn't real and the condition won't become permanent."

"Condition? I have a condition?"

"Right now you do, but it's all apart of healing."

"I hate this."

Jonathan chuckled, "But you have to do it... or else your mind will snap."

I smiled and he wiped the tears off of my face. I looked at him and leaned in, kissing him. It felt good to feel his lips against mine, but he pulled away. I frowned, "Please don't."

"I don't want to stop, trust me... but this isn't the place for what I want to do."

I blushed, "Shoot."

He smiled, "Come on. I'll take you to breakfast."

"Can I get dressed first?"

He looked me over and frowned, "I wish you wouldn't."

Smiling I said, "Well, I'm not going out looking like this."

"We don't have to go out... we can go to a fast food place, then head over to my place," as he said this, he moved me to sit in his lap facing him, both of my knees resting on the cold concrete. His hands ran up and down my sides, "We could eat there and then I can fully appreciate your adorable outfit."

I smiled, "We could always finish the pizza that we never got to eat last night."

He looked up at me through his glasses and smiled, "That we could."

I smiled and he reached up to kiss me and I leaned back, "Not the place, remember."

It was his turn to frown, "Not nice."

Smiling I placed a kiss on his nose and said, "I'm not the one who said it."

Grabbing a hold of me, he swooped me into a position that allowed his to kiss me. I moved around playfully avoiding his attempts to kiss me, but finally he caught me and we kissed. I wrapped my arms around his thin neck and he sat me back up. His hands roamed over my clothed body, and he pulled away with a sigh, "It's so unfair that we're here right now."

"Is this outfit really turning you on?"

"Yes."

"Do you want to get out of here?"

"Yes."

"Lets go."

Getting up, he took my hand and lead me up around the house and to the car where he drove off to his house.