Every Time You Fall Apart You Can Hide Here In My Arms

"So how come you're so down today?" Val asked Matt from across her kitchen table. Maddison had eaten half of her breakfast then retreated to the living room to watch cartoons and they were now alone.

Matt shook his head and placed his elbows on the table, clasping his hands together. "Nothing's wrong."

"You're a bad liar," Val got up from the table and collected the dishes, then placing them in the sink and beginning to fill it with water. She turned around and leaned against the counter, as the water filled up the sink. "What's wrong?"

"Just didn't have a good night is all," he got up to help her, hoping it would help to change the subject. "Where are your towels?"

She directed him to one of the drawers beneath the counter as she began washing dishes and he started drying. When they were finished Val dried her hands on the towel before placing it on the counter.

"Do you ever..." she looked around like she wasn't sure how to go about asking the questions, "miss us?" she asked him seriously.

The question caught him slightly off guard, mostly because she looked genuinly upset about it. "Who? You and Mattie?"

"Yeah," she nodded slightly, "and you...and me?"

"You and Mattie are in my mind every day," he wrapped his arms around her, unsure of what else to do and she buried her face in his chest, "and I always wonder what we'd be like if I hadn't screwed us up."

She looked up at him, her eyes brimming with tears and he suddenly felt like a real brute. "Do you miss me?"

She nodded and brushed the back of her hand against her cheek. "Yeah, and since I lost you, I've been thinking about how Austin must feel. I hate the fact that I messed up your relationship with her. I always wonder that if it wasn't for me, would you two still be together, or be married by now?"

Matt brushed the palm of his hand against her cheek making her look up at him as he brushed his lips against hers kissing her softly. "I wouldn't trade Mattie for the world Val."

She smiled softly as he kissed her on the forehead.

"Dad what are you doing?"

Matt and Val looked over at Mattie who was now standing in the kitchen looking up at them completely puzzled about the whole situation. Her little hands moved from her sides to her hips.

Matt smiled, "hugging mom."

Mattie wrinkled her nose in distaste, "you were kissing."

Matt and Val both laughed and released each other.

"I'm not allowed?" Matt asked his daughter.

Mattie shook her head. "No, you're not married," she climbed up onto one of the chairs at the table and looked at them with eager eyes. "Are you gonna get married again?"

Val ran her fingers through Mattie's hair, pulling it out of her daughter's eyes. "Dad and I were never married sweetie."

Mattie turned to look at both of her parents, she was clearly still puzzled. "Then how do you have babies if you're not married?"

Val glanced up at Matt for help and he simply shook his head. "No way, this is your department."

"I dont' think so," Val laughed, "she's your daughter."

"Don't pull that," Matt grinned, leaning down and kissing Mattie on the top of the head before standing up straight again. "Babies, come from the hospital, but I have to go alright babe?"

"You're leaving?" Val stood up beside him and he kissed her softly.

"Yeah, I'm gonna go see what the guys are up to."

She smiled, "alright."

"Hey dad," Mattie jumped down off the chair and grabbed him by the hand, "I'll walk you to the door."

Val covered her mouth and laughed as Matt followed Mattie to the front door. He glanced back at Val one more time and she smiled softly. Maybe he was stupid for leaving her in the first place.

He turned around again and envisioned Austin.

Then again, maybe not.

***

Austin walked out of her meeting completely satisfied with what she'd accomplished. In fact, she'd learned that by being pissed off, she was able to focus all that energy into her job, and it'd paid off. She never thought she'd be tempted to thank Matt.

"Hey you ready to go?"

Austin looked up and locked eyes with Mica. "Do I have to?" she really didn't want a break, she'd only think about Matt, "I have work to do."

Mica rolled her eyes and actually had the audacity to take her folders and papers from her. "Go...fix your hair or something and then we'll go for lunch."

"My hair?" Austin ran her fingers through her hair, "what's wrong with my hair?"

Mica placed all the paper work onto Austin's desk then closed the doors to her office, "nothing now, so lets go."

Mica handed Austin her car keys and they drove to a little Deli not too from their office building. There Gena and Leana were waiting for them at a table near the back of the room.

"Hey ladies," Leana greeted them, they were at the table before she could stand up.

"Stay sittin babe," Austin leaned over and kissed her on the cheek, "how you feeling?"

Leana grinned and rubbed her stomach lightly. "Just waiting it out, sometimes I wished I could just have this kid already. I'm sick of being pregnant."

Mica and Austin both laughed before turning their attention to Gena, "and how are you?"

Gena smiled softly, sipping on her drink, "I'm good, thanks."

The girls ordered their lunch and chatted idly while they waited. Afterwards, they headed in different directions but not before promisisng to meet up for lunch later on in the week. Austin was actually starting to enjoy their little outings together, and looked forward to actually starting to enjoy going out.

***

Matt made it home in time to catch Johnny and Lacey before they headed out.

"Johnny's taking me shopping," Lacey smiled as she slipped on her shoes, "then we're all suppose to go to Syn and Michelle's for supper."

Matt nodded and held the door open for them.

"And before I forget," Johnny grinned and pulled a cigarette from his packet, placing it between his lips, "you have a visitor."

Before he could even reply Johnny walked away. Curious, and hopeful that it'd be Austin he stepped into the apartment and closed and locked the door behind him.

However, his heart sank when he recognized the shoes. They weren't Austin's. At least, he was pretty damn sure.

The rest of the place was quiet so he went directly to his room. Johnny was right. He definitly had a visitor, and right now she was damn near naked and occupying his bed.

"Hey, baby."

Matt closed his bedroom door behind him and tried to focus on everything but her nearly perfect form. "Melanie," he greeted her, moving about his room, undoing his beltbuckle and sliding his belt through the loops of his jeans as he pulled it through and tossed it on the floor. "I thought you were mad at me?" he leaned against his dresser and locked eyes with her.

She sat up and slid to the end of the bed where she proceeded towards him. "I was, I'll admit that. But, I realized that maybe you just weren't in the mood after all the traveling you did."

Her fingers found the button and zipper on his jeans and she wasted no time in undoing them. Her eyes were mezmerising, and if she hadn't suddenly turned into Austin for a second, he would have had her pinned to the bed in seconds.

"I can't," he pushed her hands away. This was the second time he'd rejected her in a week. She was definitly going to be pissed now.

"You can't?" she repeated softly and harshly at the same time, "and why not?"

"Because I'm not really in the mood for sex right now."

Melanie rolled her eyes and sat down at the end of his bed before picking up her clothes and putting them on. "So is it me Matt? Or what's going on? Because I barely ever made it through your front door before you had me naked."

Matt ran his hand over his face. God he didn't need this right now. "No, it's not you."

"Then what is it?" she pulled her tank top down over her bra, "because I feel like you don't want me anymore."

"It's me, Melanie, not you."

"Don't tell me it's you," Melanie stood up and moved to stand in front of him. "Someone who use to enjoy sex and frequently might I add, usually doesn't just change at the drop of a hat," she locked eyes with him, "unless he's getting it from someone else."

He must have hesitated to long because she was now backing away from him and shaking her head. Christ, could anyone be better than him at driving women away.

"Mel, listen..."

"No, Matt, you listen. I know there's some big cliche about rockstars and their lifestyles and that they all live that way, but I thougt maybe you were different."

God this whole female relationship thing was going to be the death of him. "Where did you meet me, Melanie?"

She thought for a moment, perhaps considering if it was a trick question. "At Johnny's Saloon."

"And what was I doing?"

"Drinking with the guys."

"And who was I dating when you decided to persue me?"

Where was he going with this? "You were with Val."

"Exactly. So, you really think a nice, genuine guy, who has a beautiful girlfriend and child, would leave them at the drop of a hat for some chick he met in the bar?"

Her mouth nearly fell open, was he seriously admitting to her that he was a jackass?

"I couldn't hold down a relationship if my entire career was staked on it Melanie. It's not you, it's me. I'm not a commitment guy."

Melanie grabbed her purse and opened his bedroom door. "Well, Matt, have fun fucking your groupies, and when you start missing the whole 'commitment thing' remember that you had it once."

She slammed the door in his face.

"Actually, I've had it three times," he muttered to her ghost before flopping down on his bed.

***

After lunch Austin drove Mica and herself back to work where she sat at her computer, working on a graphic design for an advertisement until it was so late she couldn't keep her eyes open. Mica was sitting sideways in one of the chairs sleeping while she waited.

Austin packed up her stuff and woke Mica up gently. "You could have called a cab you know," she smiled at her friend while Mica got ready to go.

"I know," she grabbed her purse from behind her desk, "are we finally ready to go?"

Austin nodded and they headed down to her car. There, she rolled down the windows to keep cool air coming into the car, and turned up the stereo. Last thing she needed was to go to sleep while driving.

She dropped Mica off then headed for her house. As she parked in the drive way, she noticed a car that was definitly not there when she left. Unsure of what to do exactly she gripped her cell in her free hand, ready for anything as she held her purse in the other. But, once she got out and recognized the car, she was more pissed off than scared. It belonged to Matt.

She dug around for her keys and headed to the back of her house where Matt was sitting on the step waiting for her.

"Jesus, it's like eleven pm," he stood up and brushed off his jeans, "do you always work this late?"

She stepped around him and climbed the few steps onto the deck and up to the door to unlock it. "What do you want, Matthew?"

He chuckled behind her and held the door open, "I want to talk to you."

"About what?" she stepped into her house and he followed. "I didn't say you could come in."

"What, you'd rather have me sit on that step all night to catch you in the morning before work?"

Not saying another word she slipped off her shoes and placed her keys on the little table. A few seconds later, Ghost was in the entry way with them, rubbing incessantly against Matt's leg.

Disgusted with her cat she dropped her bag by the little table as well, "lock the door."

Matt did what he was told before removing his shoes and following her into her house. "Nice place."

"Thank you," she went to her fridge for a bottle of water, "you want one?"

He shook his head no as he leaned against the counter watching her intently. It was starting to irritate her.

"So," she twisted the lid back onto the bottle, "what do you want?"

"To talk about last night."

"What about it?"

She was being slightly cold, and that bugged him. "Listen, I just broke up with my...girlfriend...and I'm not really in the mood to play games anymore."

"Your girlfriend?" she whispered softly, "how tragic."

Now she was pissing him off. "What happened last night?"

She raised her eyebrow at him, this was pissing him off, and she was pleased. How did that work?

"Sex."

He clenched his hands at his sides before crossing his arms over his chest, "and were there any feelings involved on your part?"

That's not the question she expected to come next, "ughh, were there any on your part?"

He looked her over, if she was finally going to be serious, then he'd tell her the truth, "yeah, there were."

She nodded slightly, "then yes, there were on my part to."

"So?"

She placed her bottle of water on the counter. "So what, Matt? What do you want from me?"

"That's just it," Matt finally broke, "it's you Austin. You are what I want."

She stood there for a moment speechless. There it was, right in front of her. The chance to be Matt's once more. All she had to do was come up with some answer that fell along the lines of yes, or alright.

He could sense her hesitation, "but what?"

"What about Val and Mattie?"

"Mattie will always be there. She's my daughter Austin."

"That's not what I meant," Austin ran her fingers through her hair, "how do I know that a little bit down the road you aren't going to leave me for Val again because you've realized that family is more important than anything?"

"I can't answer that for you, Austin."

She shook her head slightly and sighed. "I can't risk my heart like that again, Matt...it nearly killed me the first time around."

He wanted to run to her and wrap her in his arms, but he knew that crowding her would only push her away at the moment. "Then lets take the second time slow," Matt suggested, the more he eased her into it, the more likely she'd be to agree. "Use your heart, Austin, don't just set it up on a shelf."

She searched his face with her eyes looking for any flicker of muscle that would tell her he wasn't being serious. But she couldn't find it. "Matt."

"Please, Austin," he knew that she knew of his problems, "maybe you'll be the one to fix me."