Weak, But Not Defeated

Maddie begrudgingly reached for her ringing phone on the night stand next to her. She squinted her eyes as she read her alarm clock; 5:36.

She pressed the talk button on her phone, knowing Garrett was calling to wake her up. “Garrett, I’m not going to school today.”

“Why?” he asked, an apparent pout in his voice.

“I don’t feel very well,” Maddie lied. She had been up all night helping her parents pack for their week long trip to Albuquerque that they would be leaving for early this morning.

“Okay, boo, I’ll stop by after school.”

“Thanks. I’ll talk to you later,” Maddie said and hung up, eager to get back to sleep.

After a few more hours of sleep, Maddie was awoken by her cell phone ringing, again. She pressed the talk button furiously, “What!?”

“Good morning, sunshine,” Maddie heard John’s voice through the phone.

“Hello, John,” she said, only annoyed because she was still half-asleep.

“Has anyone ever told you that you sound like a man when you just wake up?” he asked.

“Did you need something? Because it’s too early for insults,” Maddie told him.

“It is kind of early. Shouldn’t you be on your way to school? Its 7:15, Madeline,” John pretended to scold her.

“I’m not going. I’m too tired,” she said. “Why are you up so early?”

“I never went to sleep. Too much on my mind,” he said quickly, “Want to hang out today!?”

Maddie laughed, “I’m too tired, John.”

“Sleep until 9:00, and at 9:30 I’m coming to get you,” he directed.

“I’m not going out with you today, John.” Maddie said, knowing ditching school for John wouldn’t please Garrett.

“Okay! See you at nine thirty!” John said and hung up.

Maddie rolled her eyes and fell back to sleep immediately. She woke up again to John jumping on her bed.

“I wasn’t kidding, Maddie! Let’s go! I want to take you somewhere!” John exclaimed.

Maddie sat up and put her hands on John’s shoulders, “Leave me alone!”

He pouted, “Please? You don’t have anything better to do. You’re valedictorian, Maddie; no one cares if you ditch school once.”

Maddie sighed, wishing she could just tell him she couldn’t go with him because her boyfriend probably wouldn’t be too fond of that. “Fine, let me shower.”

“No need, you look great,” he said, patting down her stray hairs.

Maddie moved away, uncomfortable, “I’ll be right back.”

*

“John, why are we here?” Maddie asked as she looked at the large stage in front of her. The pavilion was outdoors, with a set of seats backed by a huge, grassy hill.

John smiled as he looked across the large arena, “We play here in two days, in front of record execs. It’s going to be huge.”

“Is that why you haven’t been able to sleep? You’ve been too nervous?” Maddie asked.

John shrugged, “That, and some other things.”

Maddie nodded, staying silent, hoping he wouldn’t bring up those other things. She sat in the grass as John still looked at the stage.

“So, are you guys going to get signed at this next show?” she asked.

John sat next to her, “Hopefully.”

Maddie smiled, “Cool,” she said, not even trying to mean it.

John saw right through her, “Don’t be sad,” he nudged her playfully. “You’re coming with us.”

Maddie looked away from him and at the clear, blue sky, “I got my acceptance letter from the University of Oregon yesterday.”

John grinned, “That’s great, Madds. I can’t even tell you how proud I am.”

“I should hear from Harvard and Yale anytime,” she told him, picking at blades of grass.

John took in a breath, “Where do you think you’ll go?”

Maddie shrugged, “Harvard was always my dream. You know that.”

John didn’t respond as he began picking at the blades of grass, too.

“Massachusetts is pretty far,” she said.

“Two thousand, seven-hundred and fifteen miles to Cambridge,” John said without having to think.

Maddie looked at him, “So that should add up about half of your miles you’ll travel on your national tour.”

“I didn’t know it was a competition,” he said.

Maddie shook her head, “I can’t stay and wait for you guys. Tempe has nothing for me once you’re gone. I have potential, John, and hanging out In Arizona isn’t going to help me take advantage of that potential.”

“I agree,” John stated, “You can’t stay in Arizona. So what about Eugene? It’s much closer.”

Maddie let out a small laugh, “Two months ago you practically wrote my application to Harvard for me.”

John sighed, “I’ll miss you, Maddie. You have no idea what that year was like when you were in England. Even the two months you were gone sucked.”

Maddie wasn’t listening to John. She was thinking about Garrett. What would happen to their relationship when he went away on tour? Or when she left for college? It would be impossible. She was snapped out of her thoughts when John’s phone rang.

He looked at the caller ID and put the phone back in his pocket. Maddie looked at him questioningly and he shrugged, “Just Courtney. Speaking of, how’s your love life lately?”

Maddie couldn’t stop the smile that crept high on her cheeks. She tried to tame it but John had already seen, “Do you have a boyfriend, Maddie?” he asked, completely shocked.

Maddie shook her head, “No, no. Just… someone I like,” she wasn’t technically lying.

John faked a smile and Maddie could see right through it, but she didn’t push. “I hope that works out for you,” he said.

“Thanks,” she replied quietly. She looked at John as he yawned, “You need to rest, John. You’re voice needs to be one hundred percent for this show.”

He smiled, “I’m fine! Listen,” he said, standing up in front of her. He began singing the theme to Aladdin and Maddie couldn’t help but laugh. His voice was powerful and beautiful, and she had no doubt he would be fine at the show.

He ran in circles around as he made up an interpretive dance for her while he belted the classic song. “Dance with me, Madeline.”

Maddie laughed as she took his outstretched hand. He twirled her around they danced like idiots. The smile that had found it’s way to adorn both of their cheeks never waivered.

After a few minutes the two collapsed on the ground, short of breath, as they laughed. “Oh boy, I need to get back in shape! Soccer tryouts are next month!” Maddie said.

“You’re going to do it!? Yes!” John grinned as he clapped his hands together.

Maddie smiled but her face fell into a frown when she realized the sun’s position in the sky. She looked at her watch, “Shoot!” She said, standing up quickly. “Garrett is coming over right after school. He’ll be at my house any minute.”

John stood up too, “Why is it such a big deal? Just call him and tell him you’re busy.”

Maddie racked her brain for a good excuse but came up empty, “You know how he gets. He’ll be in a bad mood for days if I ditch him,” she exaggerated.

John nodded as he followed her to his car. They drove home in silence and Maddie let out a sigh of relief when she saw Garrett’s car was not there. “Thanks for today, I had fun.”

John smiled, “I hope we can do it again.”

“Sure,” she smiled and stepped out of the car. “Bye, John.”

“Bye, baby,” John said.

Maddie stopped the door she had previously pushed shut, “What?”

“I said, bye, baby.” John repeated coolly.

“Baby?” Maddie asked, completely caught off guard.

“That’s what I used to call you, isn’t it? Back when we were best friends.”

“I remember, John. I just didn’t expect you to ever call me baby again.” Maddie told him.

“Well if you wouldn’t like me to, just say so.” John said nicely.

Maddie pursed her lips while she thought. It didn’t take her long to decide, though, before she smiled, “Its fine with me.”

John flashed his trademark grin and Maddie was surprised it didn’t have the same effect it used to. She walked into her house, a million thoughts running through her head.

Surely, she thought, she and John could be best friends again. She liked Garrett. She really liked Garrett. John couldn’t take her away from him, she wouldn’t allow it.

Her certainty was flawed, though. She chose to ignore the part of her conscience that was screaming at her that John’s sideways smile still made her weak at the knees. The feeling was only blocked by her denial.

And by her feelings for Garrett, that grew more and more each day.

Maddie had barely reached her bedroom before she heard Garrett’s car pull up. She quickly put on sweats and curled up in her bed. Garrett entered with a Slurpee and Maddie smiled.

“Hey, babe. How are you feeling?” he asked, sitting on her bed.

She sat up as she took a sip of the iced drink, “Much better now.”

“I missed you at school.” Garrett said.

“Sorry. I was just really tired,” Maddie said.

“I would have stayed home with you!” he said.

Maddie smiled, “Next time, then.”

Garrett leaned in closer to her, attaching his lips to hers. They kissed for a long time, and Maddie liked this side of Garrett. He was passionate and careful, while still being exciting.

The two were so wrapped up in each other that they didn’t hear the car door outside shut. They didn’t hear the front door open after a round of quiet knocking. And they didn’t hear as someone crept up the stairs and looked into Maddie’s room through her open door.

They did, however, hear when he cleared his throat, and both of them froze as they stared into the stunned eyes of Kennedy Brock.