Arranged to Marry a Guitar God

Dee: So how is married life?
Jason: Is he any good in bed?
Me: Ok it is not any different from single life at least for me and I don’t know how he is in bed. We never had sex.
Dee: Why not? You used to wish you could meet him so you could fuck him?
Zacky: Fuck who?
Dee: Sy…

I put my hand over Dee’s mouth.

Me: No one, Zacky. Don’t worry about it.
Zacky: I am evil so no way am I going to let that one go. Hey guys Jaz was talking about wanting to fuck somebody anyone want to help me find out who?
Matt: Um sure why not.

They both tackle me onto the floor and start tickling me.

Jason: Oh that has to suck since she is like ticklish everywhere.
Dee: Seriously she is the only person I know who is ticklish on her palms.
Val: Are you serious?
Jason: As a heart attack.
Syn: Why are you two molesting my wife?
Jimmy: Oh she was talking about wanting to fuck someone and when Zacky asked who she wouldn’t tell so they are trying to get her to tell them.
Zacky: Give up yet?
Me: N… O…
Matt: Fine, we can do this for hours. Just tell us. It would make life so simple.
Jason: She is going to kill me but I want to finish catching up. She wants to fuck….
Me: If … You… Finish… That... Sentence I will murder you!
Jason: But this is boring we only get to visit for a little while so let me tell.
Dee: Screw this she wants to fuck Brian.

Matt and Zacky stop tickling me and help me up. I walk over to Dee and Jason and smack both of them in the back of the head.

Me: You know if you two would keep your mouths shut this wouldn’t happen every time we see each other.
Hollie: What do you mean? And Bri pick up your mouth please. I swear it hit the floor.
Me: Every time I see them they say something that I don’t want people to know and they hear half of our convo and tickle me tell one of us cracks. I hate being the ticklish one.
Syn: Are you serious?
Me: I said I wanted to. Don’t act so surprised. That was around the same time I wanted to have hot monkey sex {Author’s note: My sister said that to me today} with Joel Madden, Billie Joe Armstrong and I think Ville Valo.
Candice: Did you say hot monkey sex?
Me: Yes, I did. Oh and Bam Margera too.
Hollie: Damn do you have a thing for famous people?
Dee: Oh god not again.
Me: No I wanted to sex them up for a reason. Like Joel is hot and has a pretty voice and he is a DC boy. Billie Joe because he is hot and funny and has nice fashion sense for a straight man. Ville is just plain sex on feet and he has an amazing voice. Bam is a bad boy and can board and does stupid things. And Syn is plain hot and like Ville sex on feet and he is an amazing guitarist. But don’t let it go to your head. Cuz the minute you open your mouth it all goes away.
Dee: Yea that is why you told us that you....
Jason: Dee, remember our lips are sealed. We swore to keep that one between us. You always open up your mouth.

Jason’s phone goes off and he answers it.

Jason: Hello*Pause* WHAT?*Pause* Where?*Pause* Ok Dee and I will get the next flight ok bye.

He hung up his phone and started to cry a little.

Dee: J was it wrong?
Jason: Mom, she is in the hospital. We have to go. She is in really bad shape.
Dee: Ok.
Jason: Sorry Hun. I was looking forward to catching up.

I got up and gave him a hug while Dee joined in.

Me: It is ok. Tell your mom I said get better soon. Go on you guys need to hurry. I love you and everything will be ok.
Jason: Thanks.

Jason and Dee left and headed to the airport.

Hollie: I am confused.
Me: Jason is really close with his mom and she was in an accident and is in bad shape.
Zacky: Why did Dee go with him?
Me: Jason’s mom is like a second mom to her.
Everyone: Oh.
Me: I am going upstairs ok.

I walked upstairs. The moment I got into the room my cell started singing The River by Good Charlotte.

Phone Convo
Me: Hello babe.
Rae: Hey what is up?
Me: Jason’s mom is in the hospital.
Rae: Is she going to be ok?
Me: We don’t know. He and Dee were going to stay here for the weekend but when he got the call they left to the airport. He will probably call me once he finds out. So why are you calling me?
Rae: Do I need a reason?
Me: No just wondering.
Rae: Well I am coming in tonight.
Me: Yeah I am going to go tell the guys. They will be happy.
Rae: You can’t tell it is a surprise. Ok?
Me: OK but I am going to let you go ok?
Rae: Ok love ya.
Me: Love ya too.

With that said I hung up the phone and laid down and fell asleep.