Death Is Never Permanent

She walked confidently towards the center of the ring, tuning out all of the loud cheering and heavy metal music playing in the background...She ignored the taunts, the gossip, the greediness of the betters... She had one thing on her mind, and one thing only...

winning....

I watched out of the corner of my eyes as Johnny and Jimmy ran out of the cramped place after Matt, who had stomped out before them. Meanwhile, Syn was holding back Zacky and some unknown guy was holding back Ale. Both of them were throwing fits trying to get out of the arms of those holding them back... Fighting their captors crazily trying to get free.

My glance then landed on Jinx who was rubbing a hand over his face while the other hand was stuck on the back of his neck as he was nervously taking everything in around him.

Last, and finally was the person in front of me.

I froze as the “referee” went through the motions. I couldn't move. I couldn't think. I just-

The guy in front of me put up his fist for me to tap... But I was still in complete shock (which wasn't good at all.) I couldn't do it, I made up my mind. I admit, I was stupid I shouldn't be doing this I cant-

So I slowly brought up my hand, lightly tapped his bandaged up knuckles with my own and stepped back, gulping hugely. Like I was swallowing something much to large to fit though my smaller esophagus. It was stuck there, the words I wasn't able to say let alone comprehend.

I couldn't believe my eyes....

It was Nichcoli.

And he was acting like he didn't even know it was me or like he gave a fuck he was about to fight me.

He disappeared months ago and hasn't been heard of from anyone since then, yet now- here he is in the club... and I'm supposed to fucking fight him!?!?! He comes from out of nowhere and is serious going to be willing to fight me. God, I didn't change that much. He had to know it was me. And he still was going to beat on me just for the fun of it? He didn't....care...

I watched numbly as he continued jumping around punching at the air in front of me, as kind of like a warm up before the buzzer sounded. Still without a hint of caring consuming him. I decided what I was going to do the moment I saw him.

-

The buzzer sounded and the music changed instantly from the sudden start of techno/electronica-like 3Oh!3's “Starrstrukk” straight into the heavier rifts in Bullet For My Valentine's “All These Things I Hate (Revolve Around Me). I looked at him as he advanced a few steps towards me.

Without any delay, I crouched down, slapped the cement floor with my full palm and bolted out of the circle to the grab my things. My whole plan was to get the fuck out of there as soon as possible. They were right, all of them, I shouldn't have done it. Fuck, I shouldn't have even considered it let alone give in to the temptation. I CAN NOT fight Nich... I just couldn't do that. Either way one of us will get hurt, one more so than the other and I couldn't think about us beating the shit out of each other. I wouldn't be able to hurt him, I never could...ever. Especially not now when my heart feels ripped out by his rejection.

“Hey get the hell back here you fucking bitch!” I heard from behind me right before I was harshly turned around and thrown up against the wall with a hand holding on to my neck. I gasped as the cold cement blocks cooled through my shirt into the skin on my back.

“Let me go.” I pleaded with him.

“Shut up and get your ass back into that rink and fight me!” He yelled and tightened his grip on my neck as I shook my head.

“Let go of me NICH!” I screamed at him this time. His only response was a tighter grip. I clawed at his hands as he squeezed until I couldn't breathe at all. With quick thinking, I kneed him, causing him to instantly let go and allow me to get away. Somewhat. He grabbed my ankles and sent me crashing roughly to the cement floor. I screamed at the pain as he sat on my stomach and bent down towards me. I blocked my face with my forearms thinking he would start pounding my head. Normally I would fight back, but I wasn't going to do that to him. I just couldn't bring myself to hurt him however small it might actually be. A bruise is still a bruise. And despite his behavior, I couldn't help but still care about him... love him. But that changed just as quick as the thought entered my head.

It was then at that particular moment, with him up close and staring at me, that I could tell he wasn't my brother... He wasn't Nichcoli...

The blood shot red eyes, the rancid smell of the alcohol on his breath.

The faint traces of something no one would ever look at or see unless they knew to look or were up close to the person in question. A distinct, dusty-like white powder littered his skin underneath his nose as well as on his upper lip...

He was doing drugs and drinking again.

He probably didn't recognize me even a little bit, he was too high and drunk... too trashed to realize it was me and not some random stranger. 'That's where he's been, why he disappeared? For the drugs.' I thought to myself in utter disgust.

I felt like my whole world was crashing in around me. I kicked him as hard as I manged to in the back and then once more just as hard, maybe even harder, in the stomach before getting up and running out of the place. I faintly heard him yell “You're mine bitch! I'll fucking find you!” I didn't know where I was going but anywhere is better than here at this very moment. I was waaaayyyy out of my element now. Too much emotional baggage, way too much.

I rushed up the steps, through the winding hallways and out of the club past a concerned looking Geo (The security/guard/door keeper bouncer guy...he has many descriptions and definitions of his job). I ran out without a second thought and made it far enough away to see the cars in the near distance before hearing a door burst open (with a loud crashing sound as it harshly hit the outside wall) behind me. I turned and saw Nichcoli running, the rest of the people from inside all rushing in crowds behind him. Towards me.

I stopped as he slowed to a walk in my general direction. I should have run, I should have taken off but something kept me frozen there. I could have sworn I seen Matt watching, shaking his head at me in disappointment for getting myself into this mess... It took my attention off of Nich just long enough to loose track of him. I wanted to cry because of the disappointment shown towards me and that I feel towards myself for that matter but I wouldn't do that here, not now. That was what cost me, majorly. If I knew everything would play out like it did I would know I was already in trouble.

Nichcoli surprisingly charged at me, pushing me to the ground before getting on top of me and setting on my waist again. Afterward was when the violence started. He started punching me as I helplessly tried blocking his shots and was screaming at him on the top of my lungs to stop.

After a few minutes I had enough and I started fighting back with everything I had, not even giving a shit anymore... Two could play this game and I wasn't playing innocent and nice anymore when he surely didn't care even the slightest bit.

I managed to grab his hair and pull him down to beat his forehead off of the asphalt over my shoulder. Proceeding with punching him repeatedly, causing the crowds making a circle around us to cheer loudly. More loudly than before anyways. I was doing perfectly find until an arm wrapped around my throat and I was pulled backwards, off of Nich completely. It wasn't Nich. I was getting 2 timed. Two against one.

I was thrown to the ground and held down as Nichcoli came and towered over me. I could have sworn the silence at that point was quiet enough to hear a pin drop. I knew he wasn't going to have any mercy on me, I was done for and everyone else realized that too. SO WHY WOULDN'T ANYONE FUCKING HELP ME!?!? You want to know why? Because as I was being held down on the asphalt below me, and he towered his nearly 6 feet above me, something clicked in all of their minds- something wasn't right.

A faint yet obvious siren sound was heard in the distance but this fight was way to good for any of them to miss. They were just waiting timidly and afraid waiting to run but instead they wanted to see the fight, they were too busy wanting to see what was happening to do anything about it now. They wanted to see who won instead of running like a pussy from the “po-po.”

Nich without delaying any longer than needed, kicked me in the ribs and head repeatedly as the other guy continued to hold me down. Eventually the guy let go but I couldn't move by that point anyways. I kept screaming things at y elder brother, for him to 'stop' I even used his full/complete name-

“How the hell do you know my real name, whore!” He yelled in my face. That got his attention that much is for sure.

“Its me Nich, its Valen-AHHH” He paused but only kicked and punched harder after that...
“Stop. Its. ME. I'm-OWW!” I just finished with one breath.“YOUR FUCKING SISTER!” Everyone around gasped. He just stared at me, gulping and trying to comprehend what I just said as if it wasn't at all true, like he didn't know what to believe.

That's when the sirens were directly next to us all and the police arrived...

He basically, hypothetically, left me for dead; laying on the cement outside dock number 125. It was 2am and the red, blue and white lit up the area for miles it seemed like. Everyone scattered at the sudden strength of the wailing sounds. Some got away, actually most did... a few got caught and fought their way out of the arms of the police and then there I was, struggling to get to my knees and not throw up from the pain forcing any food in my stomach, up towards my mouth.

Right as I managed to get to my knees I was smashed back down to the cement onto my stomach. I screamed as my ribs throbbed further in pain and stabbed at my insides. My arms were twisted the wrong ways and brought behind my back before cold metal handcuffs were put onto my wrists. Never once did I hear a word from the police guy... mistake numero uno hombre. No rights were mentioned, zilch. I at least had my Miranda rights buddy boy ole pal. He grabbed me, pulling me to my feet and he then shoved me towards and into the car.

I leaned my head against the glass of the window, wincing in pain as I watched him take off again in the direction of anyone whom he could catch. Mayhem was occurring everywhere outside the car I was stuck in without any hopes of escape...

What the hell was I going to do now? I hit my head of the window a few times. Maybe, just maybe I could hit it hard enough to crack and bust. I even tried with my feet. But to no avail.

Giving up I let out an angry sigh while a few random tears streamed down my cheeks from my eyes. I just couldn't take this shit anymore.