Love Is a Four Letter Word, and So Is Liar

"I can't take it anymore Kay." I sighed throwing myself on her couch.

"What's that?" Kay asked moving me over and sitting down.

"Her: Dawn." I explained.

Kay nodded. "I know. She ruined everything." She commented.

"No shit. I just want one night alone with Ryan. Just one night alone with him before he goes back on the road and I go back to Chicago for school is all I want." I sighed sadly.

"It's ok sweetheart. I mean didn't he promise that he would take you out on the town tonight?" Kay asked.

I nodded. "Yea, but it will be perfect if she doesn't bother us." I said sitting up.

"Well, I mean you are being good about this whole situation. He's doing the best he can. Just try and understand." Kay explained.

I rolled my eyes. "If that was to make me feel better, it didn't work."

She laughed. "It wasn't. I'm just saying that he probably doesn't like this as much as you do." She shrugged.

I thought about it for a moment. "Eh-you're right." I shrugged.

My sidekick went off. Kiss me by Sixpence none the richer, started to play.

I answered it. "Hello?"

"Hi Bee, it's me Ryan."

I sighed. "Hi Ryan, what's going on?" I asked as casually as I could.

"Um-I-I know you're leaving for Chicago soon, and um-well-um, I wanted to know if we can spend some time alone tonight?"He asked his words stammering. Something was off he never sounded like this.

I nodded even though he couldn't see me. "I thought that was the plan." I slightly laughed.

"Oh right. Ok, well I'll pick you up at 8. Is that ok?" He asked nervously.

"Ok. Bye." I sighed.

"Bye." he sighed sadly.

"So??" Kay asked eagerly.

"We're going out tonight." I forcefully smiled.

She frowned. "What's wrong?" She asked concerned. She wrapped her arm around my neck.

I shrugged. "I don't know. I just wished none of this happened." I whispered wiping away some fallen tears.

"We all wished it didn't." She sighed hugging me tightly.

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8:35 p.m.

He's late. That's not like him to be late, and if he was, he would have called me by now.

I sat on my couch nicely fixed up.

But for what? He still wasn't here.

I should have known this was going to happen.

Suddenly my phone starting ringing causing me to jump off the couch; I started laughing at myself.

"Hello?" I answered.

"Oh, Bianca, thank god you answered. I'm on my way. Ok?" Ryan asked.

"Yea, that's fine. I'm here waiting. Bye." I sighed as I hung up on him.

I hate this. It's already been three weeks since that night, and we haven't had much time for each other.

After five minutes I heard a knock at the door. I got up and answered it.

Ryan stood there in a blue button up shirt, and black slacks. He looked amazing.

"Wow." Ryan gasped.

I was wearing nothing special. It was just a black skirt, with a pink tank, and some pumps.

I looked down and shrugged. "Are you ready to go?" I asked.

He nodded. "Yea." He answered.

I grabbed my purse, and closed the door. I locked it and went to his car.

We got in and Ryan started his drive.

"I'm sorry about being late, Dawn-" I cut him off.

"It's ok. I get it. I don't want to talk about her tonight." I told him harshly.

"Ok." He said quietly.

I turned my head to look out the window. I can't help feel alone in this.

He's supposed to be my boyfriend.

He's supposed to spend his time with me

"So Bee, how have you been?" He asked breaking the awkward silence between us.

I shrugged. "I've been better."

We pulled into the parking lot of an expensive restaurant.

"I know, what you're thinking, but tonight's our night, and I wanted to do something really special." He answered before I could open my mouth.

I smiled at him slightly. "Ok." I answered.

We got out of the car, and headed towards the podium where a man with a black book stood.

"How can I help you this evening?" The man asked forcefully smiling at us.

"I have reservations for a Ryan Ross." Ryan answered grabbing my hand to hold.

The man nodded and flipped through the pages of the black book. "Aahh, yes, Mr. Ross. Right this way." He said leading us to a table.

I looked around. This place looked really, really expensive and I was worried if Ryan could afford this.

"Its ok. I can pay for this. You don't have to worry." Ryan whispered in my ear as he pulled my seat out so I could sit.

Our waiter came, handed us menus and went to get our refreshments. He soon returned and took our orders.

Once he left we were left alone at the table. There wasn't much to be said. I think we just didn't know what to say.

"Why is this so awkward?" Ryan asked breaking the silence that overcame us.

I shrugged. "I don't know. It feels like we haven't been alone in forever."

He reached over and grabbed my hand. "I know that this has been hard on us, but I want you to know that you are still in my heart. You are my girlfriend, not Dawn." He said softly looking straight into my eyes.

"I know, I know." I said trying to convince myself, more than him.

But the truth was, I didn't know anymore.