Flume

Olivia Meek was not at all as confident as the media portrayed her to be. She was not cool and aloof like all had assumed. In her mind she was quite far from her little image. Quite frankly Olivia Meek was a nervous wreck ninety percent of the time. But she had learned to, or at least tried to, mask her anxiety in the form of several bad habits. For one when she was nervous she had picked up the nasty habit of chain smoking. She picked at her clothing, and drummed her finger along surfaces. She bit her lips, and was constantly running her fingers through her hair. If people could se past their blind adoration of her they would not see the calm, cool, and collected Olivia Meek, but rather they would see a scared and nervous girl who was known as Livy Meek.

Currently she was bouncing her leg furiously and drumming her fingers along the side table next to her on the bus. She was trying to assuage her latest concerns of meeting the band that her band was to be touring with. Their name was The Maine, and she herself had asked Jack if he could get them to be their opening act. She had heard a few of their songs and had bought their new album the day it came out. But she was nervous to meet them, Jack had told her that the band practically worshipped Andie and the Walshes and were more than thrilled to be even meeting them let alone touring with them. Before she had a little bit of nerves just because she was meeting someone new, but now she was a wreck. What if she didn’t live up to her expectations? What were they even expecting her to be?

“Liv!” Keith said snapping Olivia out of her train of thought, “will you chill out? You’re starting to make me nervous.”

“Sorry” she murmured under breath, and began to look at her shirt, lightly tugging at the strings that had come loose from material. She had never liked meeting new people as a child, and would constantly hide behind her parents or brothers whenever a visitor came. Now she his behind her band mates and crew. She was more vulnerable now than when she was younger. Now all people wanted was to be seen with her, they didn’t want her, they just wanted what she had. They wanted who they thought she was. That thought terrified Olivia to no end.

Why should this band be different from anyone else? After all they were doing this tour was to help further their career, not to become best friends. Sure they might get along during the three month period, but she couldn’t help but be weary of people. She had heard the stories of the Lindsay Lohans and Britney Spears. Though she may not have been as famous as them, she was known and she would be damned before she became the next Hollywood train wreck.

The bus lurched to a halt and Olivia could feel her nerves becoming worse. Everyone had gotten off before her, now to busy in their own conversations to remember the anxious girl. She trailed behind hoping to god that the band didn’t show, or would never show.

But of course they were there, just standing there staring at them. No one else seemed to notice though for they were too wrapped up in the conversations still. But Olivia could see them all just staring as if the mist amazing thing waltzed into the hotel lobby. She groaned, inwardly to herself and paused behind Keith, hoping to god that she was no longer visible to the crowd. Jack had said something about being glad to finally see them, and the group took this as a cue to shake hands with each other. She complied sharing small grins and quick handshakes with everyone in The Maine’s crew.

Then Jack turned and began to talk with the other managers, and the boys began to talk amongst each other. Olivia stood there, again nervously picking at the hem of her shirt, waiting for Jack to finish. She no longer felt well. In fact she felt as though she was going to empty the contents of her stomach onto the marble floor beneath her. Only she had remembered that she hadn’t eaten yet, for the fact that she was so anxious. Now she could feel her stomach rumbling and wished that Jack would hurry up. When he finally did, she was at his ear in an instant.

“Jack if I don’t eat soon I think I’m going to be sick.” He didn’t respond verbally, instead he nodded, and announced to everyone that they should probably get a bite to eat. Though she would have preferred that they not go out to eat in such a large group, she didn’t complain. Instead she moved in quickly making sure she only sat with those she knew. Sure she was being ridiculously anti-social to a group of boys that appeared to be rather nice. But there was too much weighing on her mind to be concerned about making a good first impression. She had Three months to work on how she came off to them, But for now she was going to be distant and aloof.

She ate quickly and rarely spoke at the table, wishing the lunch to end immediately. When it did, instead of going out to see a bit of New York she opted to stay in her hotel room. Though she really didn’t have a choice, she had yet to begin writing the new album that her record label was demanding, so Jack had confined her to be alone for hours on end in hopes that inspiration might strike her. She muttered an apology to everyone, before dashing out to the bus to pick up her guitar case, and running back to the hotel.

Once she was comfortably situated in the room, she sat in front of her journal, gripping her pen tightly feeling desperate. Nothing was coming to mind, nothing had been coming to her mind for weeks. All she could feel was the frustration and pressure from everyone. Her band mates were growing anxious, the record label was growing irritated, and no doubt fans were growing curious on whether or not there would be any new material.

But all Olivia Meek truly wanted was an escape. She didn’t want to be the Olivia Meek anymore, nor did she want to be little old Livy Meek. She didn’t want to be the shy cautious girl that was catering to the world. When Olivia Meek said that she wanted to be free, she meant it.