When Ya Gonna Give It Up?

My eyes were open, not wanting to turn over to the side, in case she was gone, once again. One of my best friend’s on this earth, Holly James, is also my personal fuck buddy. I’m not proud of it by any stretch of the imagination, but it's the only way I can have her. I’m so in love with her that it’s pathetic. She only wants a good lay, and that’s all she’s ever wanted since we were juniors in high school. I wish I never would’ve wanted just sex from anyone, it‘s led me to this - this terrible ache for her.

It all started at Jack’s first house party he ever had. He was so nervous that day, it was hilarious. His mom was on a business trip for a week, and the person who was supposed to be watching him was at his girlfriend’s house for the next three days. Anyway, Rian, Zack, and I all got there at about 10:30 that night. As soon as I walked in, I saw this gorgeous girl. She had medium-length brown hair that fell just past her shoulders. Her eyes were this piercing green color, while her nose was medium sized, it fit her face very well. Her lips were not too big and not too small, the perfect size. The moment I saw her, I knew that I wanted her. I wanted her body so, so badly.

At first I thought it was going to be no problem. You get some alcohol in her system, make her feel wanted, get her to the nearest bedroom- and bam- you're having sex. Oh, was I 110% wrong. Actually, I couldn’t have been more wrong. She played the same game I did, she was practically me in girl form. I tried all night for her to get with me, but she did nothing but refuse and blow me off. It had never happened before, and it was such a weird feeling; a feeling I didn‘t like or want ever again.

As any other idotic teenage boy would do, I kept at it. Every party after that, I would try to get her to sleep with me, but it just wouldn’t work. I refused to sleep with another girl on this earth, until I got her. It took me seven different parties before I finally got my opportunity. She must’ve had a bad day or something, because she took drink after drink after drink. I decided this was my one and only opportunity with this girl, and I took it.

I woke up that next morning and there she was, laying next to me, gosh, she was stunningly beautiful. That night was easily one of the best nights in my entire life, she was amazing in the bed, nobody could compare. She woke up, and I told her how much I liked it and she agreed. Long story short, we’ve been at it ever since.

I tried and tried and tried to ask her out on dates, but she always said she was busy. I offered to drive her home after school constantly back at Dulaney, but no, she wouldn‘t take that either. I tried everything to get her, to have her officially mine, but every attempt failed miserably. By the sixth time we had sex, I pretty much spilled my guts to her in an attempt to get her to trust me, so we could be something, something more. It was the last thing I could think of to get her. She did tell me all about her life as well; how her father left her when she was nine years old and every other little quirk in her life, which resulted in me cuddling her while she cried, it was one of the happiest and saddest memories I‘ve had. Sad, because of how much pain she had gone through. Happy, because I got to hold her in my arms. That’s the day we officially became friends.

We got closer and closer as time went by, and I thought we actually were a couple. Sadly, my hopes and dreams of that faded as I caught her in bed with another guy. It literally broke my heart in two. I’ve never had sex with another girl until that very day she cheated. I had sex all the time, to get over the hurt and the want for my Holly. No girl was like her; for one, it wasn’t as good. Two, it didn’t feel the same, it didn’t feel as right.

There you go; now you know what my whole entire life is about. Getting Holly, it’s all I want right now. I would give up all this fame, all my fans, to be with her.

Alright, here’s the moment of truth, is she there or is she not? I closed my eyelids and turned around. Slowly, I opened them up, she was gone. My face fell completely, I’m not sure why I thought this time was any different. Every time I hope and hope and wish and pray that she will be there when I open my eyes. Every single time my love is gone. However, one day, I promise you, she’ll give in; and on that day, I’m going to prove to her, that unlike every other man in thsi world, I will be here forever.