Jasey Rae

JASEY RAE

Watching the boys perform was always exciting to me. It never got old really. I always loved watching Jack bounce and dance around the tiny room of Rian's basement, and Zack's head and long hair bouncing with the beat of his bright pink bass. Rian always seemed to go full out on the drums during practice, complete with making the weird faces as he pounded the skins; it made me laugh histerically each time. And then there was Alex. He seemed to get so into the music and sing his heart out, and I adored watching that. Seeing someone with so much passion was always a treat to watch. Today, for some reason, Alex seemed extra happy. And I think I had a pretty good idea as to why that was.

"Good job, guys!" I grinned, clapping loudly as I got my ass up from the couch. That couch had to be older than me.

They all smed gratefully at me as they started to put their stuff away. "Thanks, Hays."

I flinched, clenching my jaw a little. Lately, I was getting tired of hearing that name. All I wanted to do was to scream out my secret and tell them that I wasn't Hayley Johnson, normal girl from Chicago, but that I was Jasey Rae Scott, one of the most famous persons in the country.

Frankly, I'm surprised Jack has kept my secret for so long. Normally he was always one to blurt out a small secret when he got excited, but I think he knew he couldn't tell anyone, or I would have to leave. I guess that's why Jack is such an amazing friend. He was always so loyal to you, and he never disappointed you.

"I'm bored." I frowned, sitting back on the couch, letting out a small yawn. To be honest, I was exhausted. Training and conditioning was really starting to tire me out. And with these practices and hanging out with the boys seemed to tire me out even more to the point where I want to sleep for a few thousand years. "And sleepy. Really sleepy."

"No! Don't go to sleep yet!" Jack complained, falling on the couch next to me. He grabbing my torso and pulled me onto his skinny lap. "Not without me first."

I looked up, a smirk playing on my lips as I raised an eyebrow. I wanted to yell out 'That's what she said!' any second. 

"Oh, shit, not like that!" Jack laughed, shaking his head after finally realizing what he had just said. "That's Alex's job."

I blushed furiously, smacking him lightly. "Shut it, Barakat."

He only laughed, causing me to laugh also while letting out another yawn. "Come on, I think we all need to sleep for a while."

Everyone agreed and made their way upstairs, going down the hallways to find extra unoccupied beds to sleep in for an hour or so. Rian got his own bed and Zack quickly took one of the guest beds, instantly locking the door so he could have it all to himself. I groaned, knowing the Dawson's had one one more guest room. 

Alex, Jack, and I looked at each other, telling each other somehow telepathically that we were going to get the extra bed to ourselves. Not that I really cared if either of them got it, I could sleep literally everywhere. But a nice comfy bed versus an older couch wasn't really much of a competition. 

Instantly, my best friends and I started sprinting for the extra bed, trying to trip each other in the process.  We all made it there in a few seconds, jumping on the bed as fast as we could. I groaned out in pain, feeling Jack's body land across my body perpendicularly, and Alex's body landing on my legs the same way. They were like deadweights on me. Really heavy deadweights.

"Get off!" I laughed, trying to push them off. "I obviously was here first!"

"No way!" They said, laughing. 

"I am not sleeping on the couch. We're sharing." Alex said, getting up quickly to lie next to me. "Jack, go away."

"No! I'm not sleeping on the couch either!" He said, copying Alex's actions but on my other side.

Alex groaned, glaring at his best friend playfully. "There's no room for your fat ass!"

"Like there's room for yours? Please! Jase-Hayley was falling off the bed nearly when you laid next to her!" Jack defended, earning a fierce glare from me. I swear, he's gonna blab my whole secret.

"Your mom!"

"Your mom!"

"Shut up!" I yelled, rolling my eyes. I looked over at Jack first. "You! Shut up about Alex's fat ass, he can't help it!" Alex yelled out in protest as his best friend laughed. I looked over at Alex. "And you! Don't make fun of Jack's mom! She's a nice lady! Now, if you two don't mind, I'm going to sleep." I got situated under the covers, frustrated and sleepy, and sighed, closing my eyes.

I felt Alex and Jack copy my actions, not quite as angry as me, and finally stayed still.

"I'm sorry, babe." I bit my lip to keep from smiling. Chills ran up and down my spine as I heard him whisper in my ear. He chuckled, giving it a kiss before wrapping his thin arms around my body, pulling me closer to him. And then, I was out.

[jaseyrae]

"Jasey, when are you coming back?" The man groaned on the other line. "We want to see you! We haven't seen you since IT happened!"

I cringed, thinking of the terrible incident. "I'm coming the beginning of February."

"Come earlier! We all want to hang out! The boys and I are getting restless! This break seems like it's taking forever!"

I smiled, thinking of my boys at home. "Paul, I can't leave here until I absolutely have to. I have a life here that I really don't want to leave."

"It's a boy, isn't it?" He asked after a minute, and I could hear the smirk in his voice. He was always good at those types of things. 

I blushed automatically, Alex's mind flashing through my mind, then my other three best friends quickly. "Y-Yeah, but that's not the whole reason. There's four of them, and I love them to death. They're my best friends. Well, besides you and the guys of course. Nothing comes before you and the boys." I walked downstairs to get something to drink. Alex and the boys were still sleeping, and normally I don't answer my phone when I'm sleeping, but Paul is someone whom I would always wake up for. "You know you guys are my family."

"Yeah, and that's why we miss you. The last time I saw you, you were leaving the hospital after being almost dead for two months. Not something I want to have as a last memory of you."

I sighed sadly, knowing he was right. The whole team last saw me when I was leaving the hospital. I left right afterwards to go here. Well, Mother forced me. "I know, I know. I couldn't help that. And trust me, I really do want to come home. I love you a lot, Paul."

"We love you, too, Jasey Rae. We miss a lot." He said sadly. My God I missed them all. "Look, I gotta get going. I'll talk to you later, okay? You have your laptop with you, right?"

"'Course I do. Why?" Although, I had a pretty good idea.

"I'll gather up what I can of the team and we'll video chat, kay?" 

I smiled widely, nodding even though he couldn't see me. "Okay, talk to you later, Paulie."

"Bye, Jasey."

And the line was dead.

I sighed, tugging at my hair a little. This wig was seriously getting on my nerves lately. All I want to do is just rip it off and be myself for once.

"Hayley?"

I almost screamed, gasping as I heard the voice behind me. My heart seemed to best twenty times faster, but started to slow as I saw that it was Alex behind me. "Alex! My God, you scared me half to death!"

He smiled a small smile, his eyes showing some other emotion I couldn't quite decifer.  He came up to me, backing up to the counter and putting his hands on either side of me. "Who was on the phone?"

I cringed internally, praying that the question wouldn't come up in the conversation. But with my luck of course it happens. "No one."

"Don't lie to me. It was a guy, wasn't it?" He said, his voice having a slight edge. I hated when he sounded like that.

"N-" I stopped myself short. I knew I couldn't lie to him. He knew me all to well. He could always see right through my lies, no matter how good they were. "Yeah..."

He sighed, a little angry as he looked at his feet, his jaw bones poking out a little as he clenched his mouth. 

"It's not what you think, Alex, I swear." I said quickly, hoping it would save me. I continued when I saw that he didn't look up. "Please believe me, Lexi. It was just a friend from home."

"This is your home." He said, looking up, but I was already shaking my head, giving him a sad smile.

"Oh, Al, you don't know how much I want to convince myself that that statement is true. But you know Chicago is my home. My real home."

"No, Hayley! THIS is your home now. Maryland is your home! Why can't you see that you have family here now?" He asked sadly, putting his hands in mine. I knew where this conversation was going. It wasn't even about my phone call anymore. It was about how I had to leave in less than two months.

I sighed glumly. "I have family in Chicago, too! My whole life is there, Alex!"

"No! You have a life here. I just heard you say it over the phone." He said, squeezing my hands a little, lacing our fingers. 

"Alex, you know I'd never want to leave here." I couldn't deny that. I had a life here. The boys were my life. But I also had a life in Chicago. My boys were there, my second family. I couldn't just desert them. Besides, I had to continue my career. I could never just stop that. That was my life. "But...I have a life I left back home, and I want to continue it. Al, you and the boys, you're my life in Maryland. You know how much I love you to death." I said, using my hand to put on his cheek. "Last week...was one of the best days of my life. I've waited for that day since the first day I met you."

He smiled at that as we both remembered the first day I went to Dulaney High School. "Then why didn't you agree to be my girlfriend then? Coulda saved us from so much drama."

I laughed breathily. "Because I barely knew your name then." I leaned my forehead on his, giving his nose a short kiss. "But hey, look at us now. Already a week together and better than ever. When I get back to Chicago, I promise you with all my being, we will work out. I have no idea how, but we'll make it work." I said quietly. "I promise you."

He smiled, leaning in to give me a long kiss. My heart sped up from the touch. "You're incredible, Hayley Johnson. I wish I would've asked you earlier."

"Trust me, I would've said yes." I smirked before giving him another kiss.

[jaseyrae]

I shivered, cuddling closer to Alex's side. The cd was bitter, biting at our exposed skin. Going on a walk with Alex was really fun and relaxing. Even though it felt like it was twenty degrees below zero, we still went. It just meant we could be closer to each other. We joked around, talking about really anything we could think of. Music, movies, our past. Alex was amazing to talk to. I could tell him anything because I was so comfortable around him. Well, almost everything. But still, it was fun and I loved being with him. And I prayed he felt the same with me.

We swung our joined hands, doing anything we could to get warm. Winter weather in Maryland was bitter cold.

"Come on, let's go get warm." Alex said, leading me into a local coffee shop. We had ordered our drinks and Alex insisted on paying. "I got it, Chicago." He was already handing the cashier the money.

"It's fine, Lex. I can pay myself." I said, grabbing my drink along with him. He got some coffee concoction he always got, and I had simply gotten hot chocolate. "You didn't have to do that."

"Oh hush and let's go sit." He smiled, leading towards a table. We sat down near the window, sitting next to each other so we could both face the window and watch the people pass by. 

I sighed, leaning my head on his shoulder. "Hey, Al?"

"Yeah, Hayley?" He asked, taking a sip of coffee.

"Thank you. For...everything." I said quietly, knowing he could hear me. It was true. I was so thankful for everything we went through, even all the drama. It helped me, in most ways I would not figure out until I was older, but right now, I was just thankful that he was there for me. That he listened to me, and cared about me.

He kissed the top of my head before leaning his on my own. "Thank you. You've been the best friend I could ever ask for. And being my girlfriend made my life all the better." He said quietly in my ear before giving it a kiss.

"I don't see how." I looked down at myself, pursing my lips in disapprovement. My skinny jeans hung loosely off my legs, and my boots covered my very large feet. My shirt clung to my stomach and the sweatshirt and jacket I had on made me look fifty pounds heavier than I actually was, which meant I looked really big. I didn't have any makeup on, and I just put my hair up without really combing through it. I looked like a mess. How could I be appealing to anyone, especially Alex?

"Yeah, look at you." Alex said quietly in my ear, running his nose over it softly. "Hayley Johnson, you're absolutely gorgeous. How could anyone not like you?"

I felt a slight blush creep on my face, my hear speeding up at the touch of our skin. "You're supposed to say that, you're my best friend and boyfriend, it's your job."

"Yes, and as my job I'm supposed to tell you the complete truth. And I promise you, Hayley, you're beautiful." He said softly, kissing my ear lightly before pulling back.

Suddenly, two cookies on a small plate were placed in front of us. I looked up to see the cashier smiling down at us. "On the house. You guys are so cute together."

"Oh, you don't have to-" I said, blood pooling at my cheeks as I sat up straight.

"Thank you." Alex smiled, covering my mouth with his hand. He gave me a 'Don't fight' look and looked at the waiter. "That means a lot."

"Merry Christmas." The girl smiled before walking away.

My smile matched Alex's as we each reached for a cookie. I bit into mine, loving the taste. It was really good. I laughed as Alex ate his in one chomp, crumbs all over his jackets and face. I set my cookie down, brushing my hands before reaching up and wiping his jacket. "You're such a pig." I took my thumb, brushing lightly over his lips before giving them a kiss.

"You love it." He smirked, before suddenly shoved a cookie in his mouth. My jaw dropped, looking over at the now empty plate. I smacked his chest. "Jerk!"

I took my to-go cup of hot chocolate and started to walk out of the little shop. I heard him laugh behind me before I felt his arms wrap around my waist, his lips attached to my cheek. "I'm sorry, babe. I couldn't help it." 

"Whatever." I smiled, snuggling closer to his warm body.

[jaseyrae

"Hey, guys!" I said excitedly, waving at the screen that held my four absolute best friends. The whole team was my best friends, but these boys were like my older brothers. I could literally tell them anything. 

"Hey, Jasey Rae!" They said, each giving a just as excited wave as me.

"How are you? How's the weather over there?" I smiled. "As if I didn't already know though." I smirked, rolling my eyes playfully. "It's snowing over here with already a foot of snow."

"Enough about the weather, Jase! Tell us about life over on the east coast! Is it fun? What's different? What happened? Do you like school?" Aj asked quickly, earning a laugh from me.

"It's pretty amazing over here actually." I smiled, pushing my glasses up the bridge of my nose. "At first I absolutely hated it. But...it definitely grew on me."

"You mean a boy grew on you." Alexi smirked, raising his eyebrows.

I blushed deep red, causing hoots and howls from the boys on the screen. "Whatever. They're four boys. They're...my family. I love them to death."

"So which one's your boyfriend?" Paul grinned.

"Alex. His name's Alex Gaskarth." I blushed, suddenly getting excited. "He's really hilarious, and he's so gorgeous. His eyes are this deep brown and sparkly, and he's really talented. He's in a band and they're fantastic. I could seriously listen to his voice all day! And he's so sweet! Sometimes a little immature, but aren't we all?" I smiled, running out of breath from talking so fast.

"Whoa whoa whoa, calm down, Jasey." Scott laughed, causing me to blush. "Now start from the beginning. How'd you meet him?"

[jaseyrae]

"He's sounds like he's a good guy, Jasey." Aj said, smiling at me as I finished up my story of my first day of high school here to yesterday.

"He is. He's a really good guy." I smiled, nodding.

"So have you been keeping up with your training?" Alexi asked.

I nodded, giving him a shrug. "Yeah, beat my record for sprinting finally. Took a while, but I did it."

"Is everything back to the way it was now? You'll be fine for the season?" Scott asked, already seeing me start to nod.

"Yeah, everything should be back to normal once practice starts up." I shrugged, brushing it off. "I need a new bat though. Mine's all beat up."

"'Bout time. You've had that one for at least two seasons." Alexi smirked, causing me to laugh.

"So has anyone figured out who you are?" Paul asked, causing me to sighed sadly.

I nodded. "Yeah, my best friend Jack. But it was completely an accident. He snuck in my house and I almost smacked the loving hell out of him, but he saw me without my wig on. Whatever though, he's keeping it a secret. He won't tell anyone. He's a good kid." I smiled, giving them a shrug. 

"You're telling me that you're the most famous girl in the world, and the most recognized person anywhere in the world, and you're telling me that they don't recognize you because you have a wig on? Fuck, Maryland people are stupid." Aj laughed, causing me to give him a big shrug.

"You're telling me. But it's not really their fault. I wear color contacts so they can't see my blue eyes.. And my hair is the opposite color of what it normally is. So I mean, it's not really their faults." I said, trying to defend my second home. "But, they know me as Hayley Johnson, normal girl from Chicago, not Jasey Rae Scott, best baseball player that's in the pros. So I guess that's all that matters."

"Chicago?"

Do ever think back to those times when you were a little boy or girl and you got caught by your parent when you were doing something wrong like stealing a cookie or two? That when you hear your mother or father say your name, you freeze completely inside and out? That feeling of just utter fear that you knew you were about to get in really big trouble.

Well, I felt like that the second my name reached my ears. And it was none other than the one boy who I wanted most not to hear the words that left my mouth. "Oh shit."

I looked over quickly, wanting to crawl out of my skin at the moment. He was standing in my doorway, a terribly sad look in his eyes and etched on his face. He looked like he was about to cry. He looked furious.  "Alex-"

"Don't even." He spat, causing me to flinch. "You are such a fucking liar! I can't believe you would do such a fucking thing like this! Hay-Jasey, we're through." He turned on his heels, giving me one last glare before stalking out of the house.

My whole world seemed to crash down at his words. The last two words stuck out though. The words made me want to die. "Alex! Wait!" I yelled, throwing on my boots. I looked over at my computer, giving my best friends a sad look before quickly telling them I had to leave and closing my laptop. I swiped a sweatshirt from my bed and ran after the boy that seemed to take my whole world with him when he left.

"Alex! Please!" I yelled, shutting the front door behind me and looking around. I sighed of relief when I saw him walking on the sidewalk. A sense of Deja vú quickly came to my mind as I rememered the day of the party. I ran after him, skipping a few times on the ice but caught myself before something bad happened. I ran in front of him, putting my hands on his chest to stop him. "Alex, please! Let me explain!"

He only pushed past me, making my heart drop and my eyes sting with tears. I did the same thing, making him stop this time. "Al! Please! Hear me out!"

"Why should I?" He snapped, venom dripping from his voice. "You fucking lied to me! Why should I fucking listen to you?"

"Because there's a reason I couldn't tell you! You have to hear me out! Please!" I was practically on my knees to beg him, the tears rolling down my cheeks.

"Fine. You have one minute." He grumbled, shoving his hands in his pockets.

I sighed, rubbing my temples with my fingers. I had a terrible headache. "Do you know why I moved here, Alex?"

"Obviously not." He spat at me.

I sighed, sitting on the bench. The town always had benches on the sides for people to sit. "It was a month into my fourth season of professional baseball. I was really at the top of my game. I was sixteen, full of energy, and I just felt really good that day. No one saw it coming. Anyways, I went up to pitch. I was throwing a no hitter that day. One of many. And a batter came up, a good friend of mine."

-----
I smiled down at Tom, seeing him give me a grin before starting to get ready to bat. It was always close with. It seemed like he was going to break my streak any pitch now.

I dug my cleat into the dirt, seeing the small dirt cloud form, but I ignored it. I nodded at Aj, giving him the signal that I wanted to do the curve ball he suggested. My hand cupped the brand new baseball in my left hand as I got in my stance. Taking a deep breath, I did my wind up, then threw the ball full speed towards Aj's awaiting glove. "Please don't hit it." I whispered before I heard a loud crack. A very sharp pain went through my body, my head pounding at the impact of something smacking into it. 

Then, everything was black.
-----

"I was out before I even hit the ground. Shattered skull and part of my jaw. Nearly died in the hospital. They said I lost a ton of blood. They had to make a whole new pitcher's mound because there was so much of my blood on it." I said, cringing at the memory. "The whole game got called because my team refused to not go to the hospital. Said I nearly died four times in the two months I was in the coma. But something kept bringing me back." I shrugged, seeing him sit on the opposite side of the bench, as far away from me as possible.

"So, once I woke up, I had to learn how to walk again and do basic things like my alphabet and mathematics. Slowly, very slowly, everything came back to me. Just a little shaken up from everything. My head still pounded, but it subsided after a while. Slowly but surely I was my oldself again. As i got addmitted out kf the hospital everyone and their mother wanted to get my own personal view of the incident. They all asked the same questions: was I mad at Tom? How do you feel? Will you still be able to play baseball? They kept prying into my life and wanting to know all about something that I wanted to completely forget. 

"So, my mom rented a house here, where no one really famous has come from. Trust me, i didnt even want to be here. I hated it. She pulled me away from my friends and my family, my life.... We changed our names, I got a wig and contacts, and went to school, even though I finished already. I was like a defective undercover. I woul go to school, make a few friends, and then when the next season started up, I'd leave. And no one would remember Hayley Johnson." I explained, wiping furiously at the stupid tears that were falling down my cheeks. 

"But Alex, you have to understand why I couldn't tell you! If the word got out-"

"I would've never told anyone." He snapped, still as furious as ever.

"I know you wouldn't have. But I couldn't risk it! If it slipped out by accident, everyone would find out. And then I would have had to leave because moving here would have all been a waste of time." I sighed, knowing that if Jack knew my secret, he'd never forgive me. So I had to keep that little detail to myself.

I started to smile a little, staring the snow covered ground. "And then when I was with you guys...I completely forgot about my life back in Chicago. You guys made me feel like I was...normal. It was awesome being Hayley. I could go places without people following me, asking for pictures and autographs. I could do anything I wanted because I was just a normal girl.

He hadn't moved since I started my story, and that made me feel worse, but very little by very little, his face was softening the tiniest bit. But he still held that angry look in his eyes.

"And then I met you my first day of school." I smiled even wider, remembering the day I met the boy who I didn't know was going to be my boyfriend. "You were definitely the hottest guy I had ever seen." I blushed at the fact, still staring at the ground. "And you kept asking me be your girlfriend. And trust me, deep down I wanted to say yes, but I barely knew you so I couldn't. And we all became best friends, and you...I hate to admit it but I was falling for you, hard. 

"And then that stupid party came and ruined everything. I hated myself for doing such a thing to you. Truly. And then last week we finally got together." I smiled, noticing the tears had stopped. "I thought everything was going to be great. I was going to tell you before I left. We'd be a couple until I went home and we'd make it work with me traveling all over. And I'd come and visit you all on my breaks and I'd get you to come to some games. And everything would be perfect." I scowled at my stupid plan. 

"But I guess that's down the drain now." I sighed, looking over at him for the first since what felt like a hundred years. His eyes were still angry, furious ever, but his face told other wise. He understood why I couldn't tell him. "Please don't be angry with me, Alex. Having you angry at me...my whole life crashes down. You're the only one who...makes me feel at home anymore. I know I should have told you earlier, but trust me, I couldn't risk it. It was a huge secret to tell to someone that I had only met a few months prior."

He didn't talk for a long time. He just stared at me. And that made me feel worse. He wasn't going to forgive me. He wasn't going to be my friend anymore. He wasn't even going to look at me. He was done with me. I had hurt him too much in the past and this was the last straw. I was going to lose probably the best thing that's ever happened to me. His mouth opened, then closed, a second time, a third.

"Please say something." I whispered, my voice pleading. Another tear fell down my cheek, but before I could wipe it away, he slid over and and used his thumb to wipe it away, shocking me completely. 

"I hate it when you cry, Hay-Jasey." He mumbled, using his sleeve to wipe my cheeks softly. He took his hand and lifted it up so I could look at him. It sounded so amazing to hear him say my real name. The way it rolled off his tongue seemed like he had been saying it for years. "Please don't cry."

"I can't help it." I croaked out, feeling more tears rush down, which he quickly brushed away. "I'm so, so, so sorry. You have no idea how bad I feel about not telling you. I'm just...I'm so sorry...."

He sighed, staring at me for a minute before speaking softly. "I'm definitely angry at you, Jasey. There's no doubt about that." I cringed, knowing what was coming up next. "Now hear me out, I'm angry with you, but I understand why you didn't tell me. I guess...we all would've treated you differently if we would've known." He said, his eyes softening. "So how can I be angry at you for that? I mean, I probably would've done the same thing." 

I started to smile as one started to tug at his own lips.

He chuckled breathily, shaking his head at his thoughts. The gesture made me want to do five thousand backflips because I was so happy. "Jasey Rae, my baseball star girlfriend."

I grinned at his last word. He was still my boyfriend. He wasn't going to cut all contact from me. He was still my absolute best friend. 

His lips were on mine, and I was sure I felt fireworks, as cliché as it sounds. But it felt like we were the only two people on the earth, and if I wasn't sitting down, my knees would have buckled and I would have fallen. I was beyond happy. I was ecstatic really. Nothing could bring me down.

"And trust me, I was falling for you the second I met you."