Right Where We Left Off

I emptied out my bag onto the bed, trying to find the keys for the Drop Dead garage as the new shipment of the summer collection is being delivered today at 3pm. Oli had given me the keys to look after so he didn’t lose them. And what had I done? I had gone and lost them. I can’t remember the last time I had seen them. I must have put them down somewhere, a place where I wouldn’t forget, though clearly I had forgotten.

My fingers fumbled as I spread out all the things over the bed, trying to separate everything making it easier to find them. My mobile, purse, make-up bag, sunglasses, house keys, iPod, loose change, a small bag of Harbio and a book were everything in my bag.

I huffed in annoyance and snatched the empty bag off the bed, turning it upside down and shaking it, just in case there was still something in it. Something fell out and I quickly dropped my bag, only to see that it was a packet of chewing gum.

“Fuck.” I muttered under my breath.

My hands flew up to my hair, grabbing fistfuls of it tightly at the sides in frustration. Oli had just given me one tiny job and I couldn’t even manage to do it. Thank God, he was over at Matt’s place right now otherwise he’ll be wondering what I’m doing and asking questions, making me nervous.

I hastily opened my bedside table draws, rummaging through them rapidly. I climbed over the bed onto Oli’s side and opened the bottom one, nothing but comics. I opened the top one and rummaged through that, only to find a load of condoms, a book, notebook and a sketchbook.

I looked through it again just in case and dig right to the back and felt something velvet, small and square. My body froze and I looked down at my arm as it slowly came back out, my fingers gripping the object. My eyes widened as a small, black square box was in my hand. A square box, black and small, only something like that would only hold jewellery.

I carefully and slowly opened the small black box. I gasped as I saw a silver ring with a diamond in the middle and one little ones on either side. I quickly snapped it shut, my heart beating rapidly and my pulse racing. This couldn’t be happening. This was too soon.

We’d only recently just moved in together, okay so 3 months ago, but still, this was just way too soon. I didn’t even understand, it took Oli a year and 2 months to ask me to move in with him, he was jumping the gun just a bit. This wasn’t like him at all.

“Nell?”

I jumped as the door slammed. I was so trapped in my thoughts and starting at the little black box in my hand that I didn’t have much time to comprehend that Oli had just come in.

My eyes darted around the room and I hastily threw the box back in the draw, shutting it forcefully. I quickly gathered up all my stuff on the bed, shoving it into my bag as Oli called my name again, his voice sounding closer.

“Oi yer!”

My head snapped up as I zipped my bag up, sitting on my knees on the bed and starting at Oli who had a curious look on his face.

“What are yer doin’ ‘ere?” He asked me, giving me an odd expression.

I tried to relax and not looked so suspicious, but all I could see was Oli getting on one knee, opening the little black box and saying 4 words to me. I hugged my bag closely to my chest trying to get rid of the image in my head.

“Why aren’t yer at the office? The shipment will be ‘ere soon.” Oli said, folding his arms across his chest. “C’mon I’ll go with yer. Yer got the keys?”

“Erm… yeah.” I squeaked out.

“C’mon them.”

I slowly got off the bed, doing my best not to make eye contact with Oli. I walked past him, but was suddenly caught off guard as he grabbed my arm and spun me around.

I looked up at him wondering what he was doing, but then I saw his big warm chocolate eyes and a small smile on his face. He leaned down to me closely, our noses sliding against each others, I could feel his warm breath against my bottom lip and then my eyes closed slowly as he pressed his lips against mine. He cupped my face with both of his hands as we kissed.

The kiss was soft and sweet, he parted his lips and we got to open mouth kissing. My heart was beating fast, the blood rushing through my body, my legs going jelly. I placed my hands on his waist, trying to stable myself. When he pulled away, I forgot about the little black box and gazed at him dreamily. He always had his affect on me, it was insane sometimes.

“Let’s get going then.” Oli said softly and quickly pecked me on the lips.

I then snapped out of the kiss, realizing what was happening. It was annoying sometimes how charming Oli can be, making me forget about so many things when we’re together, but mostly I loved it. I’ll just zone out and it’ll feel like it’s only us in the world.

“Wait…” I said quickly as Oli laced our hands together, his keys in the other, leading me out of the bedroom. “I… I need to do this, erm….er, thing on the way first, beforehand.”

Oli eyed my sceptically. “What thing?”

“Just this thing.” I said too quickly. I couldn’t tell him that I didn’t know where I had last put the keys to the garage and needed to find them now otherwise I’d miss the arrival of the new shipment.

“Why can’t I come with yer to do this ‘thing’?” He eyed me cautiously, his lips twisting at the side a little.

“I thought yer were at Kean’s place anyways. What yer doin’ back?” I asked him, avoiding the question. It was easy to distract Oli; it was something I had to my own advantage.

“Just forgot to bring me note book s’all.” Oli said and let go of my hand, walking over to his side of the bed, opening the top draw of his bedside table.

My body froze, gripping tightly onto my bag handles as I watched Oli rummaged through his stuff in the draw. My heart was beating so fast I thought I might have a heart attack. My palms were clammy as I realized that maybe he wasn’t looking for his note book in the draw, he was actually looking for a little black box.

I slowly stepped backwards out of the room. “Right…I’m gonna head off now.” I told Oli keeping my eyes on him as he still looking through his draw.

“Wait, I’ll come with yer.” Oli said, his tone annoyed and looking up at me with a small frown.

“No, s’fine. I’ll give yer a text later.” I said quickly and then my body leaped into action as I darted out of the room, opening the door and shutting it behind me. I breathed out heavily, like I had been holding my breath all the time being in the apartment with him.

I took my car keys out of my bag and hastily ran down the stairs, not bothering to wait for the elevator, just in case Oli was close behind me. I didn’t want him to ask me those four words because I didn’t want to say no, but I couldn’t say yes. It was just too soon. The next step we were going to take was to get a pet, but we hadn’t gotten around to that and now he has an engagement ring in his draw?! He was taking giant steps with his skinny, lanky legs while I was way behind, taking it slowly.

Once I got out of the building, I paced to my car, got in and started it up. I decided to go back to my old flat, where I knew Gracie would be - my best friend from school and the only one that I was still friends with. We got a flat together during the second year at college, it was just going to be the two of us but then things got a bit tight so we had to clean out the other room with all random junk in it and rent that out.

So Gracie was now living with Nagging-Nancy, because that’s what she does, she nags. She could nag for England the way she goes on. I hated to leave Gracie with her, but she ordered me to go live with Oli when he asked and I promised that she was welcome over anytime she wanted, like when Nancy was nagging.

I turned left into town, only five more minutes till I was at Gracie’s. My palms were starting to get clammy again after I had texted Gracie telling her ’EMERGENCY’.

I tried to focus on the road but my mind was way off somewhere that involved a white dress and flowers. Something I did not want. I had only just turned twenty a few months ago, I was not ready to get married. I couldn’t believe Oli even had a flipping ring in his draw! Perhaps I was jumping the gun, maybe it wasn’t an engagement ring it could be just a ring. Urgh, who was I kidding? It’s a bloody engagement ring.

I parked outside the old flat and quickly got out the car, locking it and went round the back to the front door. I still had my key from living here and every time when I came over, I’d just let myself in like I still lived here, it gave me a sense of comfort, Gracie doesn’t mind either but Nagging Nancy does, what a surprise!

“Hey Gracie!” I yelled when I walked up the stairs and went round the corner to find Gracie sitting on the sofa watching Beauty & the Beast, with her duvet.

“Nelllieeeee!” She yelled as she saw me, a grin across her face and then suddenly went serious. “What was yer text about, yer made well me curious!”

“Oli’s gonna ask me to marry ‘im.” I told her straight up as I flopped down on the sofa next to her, staring feebly at the TV as Belle and the Beast danced in their magic romantic world.

“What…are you serious? Seriously? Seriously, are you, what?”

I turned to her, raising one eyebrow at her, she stared at me dumb folded. I narrowed my eyes at her, frowning slightly, trying to make out her words and what she was actually saying. She did this a lot when she was caught off guard, it was amusing.

“What?”

Gracie pulled a face at me. “How do yer know?”

“I found a ring in his bedside draw.” I sighed, slumping back against the sofa sighing.

“What are yer doin’ goin’ through his draws?”

“I was lookin’ for the keys for the Drop Dead garage. The new shipment comes at 3pm today. I can’t find ‘em anywhere.”

“Oh!” Gracie yelled.

I looked over to her, with an odd look as she got up, still in her pyjamas and tip topped pass me, opening the door to her bedroom. I stared at the open door, wondering what she was doing. She came out, leaning against the door frame, smirking at me with a set of keys dangling from her index finger, a set of keys with a Drop Dead keychain.

“Yer ‘ave them?!”

“Yer left ‘em here last night, yer twat.”

I gave her a wide smile and stretched my arms out, wriggling my fingers to her. “Yer’ve saved my life!”

“On a daily basics.” Gracie grinned, walking over to me and dropped them into my hands. I squeezed them tightly, feeling relieved.

“So just ‘cause Oli’s got a ring don’t mean he’s gonna ask yer to marry ‘im.” She said nonchalantly, wrapping the duvet around her, looking at the TV. “Maybe it’s not an engagement ring.”

“Uh…well, I don’t know what else it could be other than that.”

Gracie shrugged and then a small smirk tugged up on her lips. “A promise ring?”

I scoffed. “It’s is definitely not that. We haven’t made it through one day without…uh, yeah.” I mumbled the last part, my face blushing as those thoughts erupted my mind.

“Well, obviously.” Gracie muttered lazing turning her head to me, her eyebrows raised. “Anyways, how do yer know if he is gonna ask yer to marry ‘im? He might not, maybe he just has it.”

“Why would he have an engagement ring if he wasn’t gonna ask?” I answered her question with another one.

Gracie, twisted her lips to the side, her thinking face on. “Hmmm, not sure. Why don’t yer ask?”

“What?” I shrieked. “Are yer crazy? I can’t ask ‘im ‘bout it!”

“Why not, don’t yer wanna marry ‘im?” Gracie asked, turning her attention back to the TV.

I looked away from her to the floor. I didn’t know what to say to Gracie, even though I confined everything in her, I just couldn’t tell her that I didn’t want to marry Oli. I wasn’t ready; I couldn’t understand how he was ready for this kind of commitment.

We had some trust issues in the beginning of our relationship when he was off on tour doing god knows what, but my mind was at ease now when I went on tour with him and it was just a bunch of guys with laptops in a tour bus, I worried about nothing.

My heart was racing at the thought of Oli asking me to marry him, staring up at me with his big, brown, warm, chocolate, puppy dog eyes, waiting for me to say YES. I knew that I couldn’t say no to him when he was like that, but I didn’t want to lie to him either. Perhaps Gracie was right, maybe it wasn’t an engagement ring; maybe he wasn’t going to ask me to marry him. I hope.

“Nell?” Gracie said loudly after a long silence between us. “Don’t yer wanna marry him?”

“It’s not that I don’t…” I mumbled quietly. “It’s just, well…it’s just…it’s just too soon. We’ve only just moved in together…I can’t, this is too fast, too soon. I’m not ready.”

“Oli will understand.”

I sighed, grimly running my hand down my face. “I know he will, it’s just…I know it’ll break ‘im. I don’t want ‘im to be like that, I don’t want to make ‘im feel like that. If he asks me I don’t think I can say no.”

“Well like I said Nell, he probably aint gonna ask yer. He probably just has it.”

“He probably just has it.” I repeated, mumbling, nodding my head.

“Aren’t yer meant to be at the office now? It’s almost 3.” Gracie said as I looked up at her.

“Oh shit!” I yelled, jumping to my feet quickly, looking at the clock on the TV. “Shit. Shit. Shit. I gotta go, I’m sorry. Thanks for the key’s, I’ll text yer later, okay.” I said quickly, grabbing my bag and the keys, leaning down hugging Gracie.

“Yeah sure and don’t worry ‘bout the whole Oli marriage ring thing okay!” Gracie shouted as I rushed to the door.

“Okay, bye!” I yelled back shutting the door behind me, running down the stairs and out the front door.

I got into the car hastily, starting the engine and reversed out, speeding up to get to the Drop Dead office.

I needed to push everything out about finding the ring and marriage with Oli out of my head. I need to focus on what was being delivered today and make sure everything was in check.

As I parked the car outside the office I quickly checked my phone, I had one miss call and two texts, all from Oli.

Are you at the office now? xx

Babe? Its 3 now. I’m comin over there in a bit xxx

I got out the car, while texting him back telling them that I was at the office now. I put the phone back into my bag, getting the keys out and unlocked the door, walking in and shutting it behind me. I took the stairs two at a time and went into Oli’s office, placing my bag down on the desk and picking up the order shipments that were coming.

I checked them all and then grabbed the garage keys, walking out of the office, back down the stairs too the garage door on the left and unlocked it. I pressed the button for the garage door to open up and walked in, turning the lights on and moving some boxes around to make some space.

I jumped as I heard the bell ring and stopped moving the boxes around. I walked out of the garage to see a guy wearing a cap, jeans and a polo shirt, with a clip board in his hand, looking up at the window.

“’Ello?” I asked meekly.

“I ‘ave a delivery for a Mr Sykes for Drop Dead,” he said, looking at his clipboard.

A small smile tugged on my lips from the way he said Oli’s name. It sounded weird coming from him and using the term ‘Mr’, it was normally me that called him that when we’re in bed…

“’Ello Miss?”

I jumped a little, the wires in my head connecting together properly, getting my mind out of the gutter.

“Y-Yes, that’s right.”

“Okay. Just need yer to sign ‘ere ‘nd ‘ere.” He said giving me a funny look and handing me his clipboard.

I took it from him, looking down at the sheet, checking everything and double-checking. I signed for it, read it over again and again to make sure everything was correct. I knew Oli got pissed off when the new shipment was wrong.

I looked up as the delivery guy opened his van and picked up a box and setting it down next to two other boxes. Great, he wasn’t even going to put them inside the garage.

“Okay that’s it.” He said and I handed him back his clipboard. “Thanks.”

I nodded, folding my arms across my chest and giving him sideways smile, annoyed that I’d have to pick these up myself. Once he got into his car and rode off I sighed, running my hand through my hair. I picked up one of the boxes that were a bit heavier than I thought, my feet padding towards the garage. God, I hope no one could see me right now.

I set it down as soon as I got into the garage and leaned back, stretching my spine. I placed my hands on the top of it, putting my weight onto it, biting my lip as I thought about how I might do this. I went back over to move the other boxes I was moving around before to make some more room.

I was oblivious to anything that was happening as I moved the boxes around; a pair of arms caught me by the waist, making me gasp loudly in surprise and shock. I turned around looking up at a smirking sod.

“’Ello love.” Oli chuckled, leaning down and kissed me softly.

I was too shocked to response to the kiss. He chuckled again looking at me, kissing me again on corner of my mouth.

“Yer looked funny bringin’ the box in ‘ere.” Oli grinned at me.

I glared at him, wriggling out of his arms, annoyed that he had seen me and not bothered to help.

“Oh no yer don’t.” Oli demanded, tightening his arms around me.

“Oli no.” I complained. “I ‘ave to get the rest of the boxes. I looks like gonna rain.”

Oli sighed but let me go anyway, following me outside. I went to lift up one of the boxes, but Oli stopped me and lifted it up himself, walking back into the garage.

I rolled my eyes behind his back and turned around to the last box. I bent my knees and gripped the corners of the box, lifting it up quickly. This one didn’t feel so heavy and I managed to bring it into the garage, putting it down next to the others.

“Thanks babe.” Oli said softly as I stood up straight, tucking my hair behind my ear as he lean down and pecked me on the lips.

He laced our fingers together, leading me towards the door, turning the light off and pressing the button for the garage to shut. I closed the door behind me, our hands dropping as Oli sprinted up the stairs with his long lanky legs. I trailed slowly behind him, quickly getting a glimpse of him before he disappeared into his office.

I wandered in and moved my bag and paper work out the way as I sat down on the desk. Oli was sitting on the chair staring at the computer as he typed something up. I reached across him and grabbed the stamp, finding the shipment papers, stamping each of them and putting them into the tray.

Oli clicked out of whatever it was that he was doing, twirling around in the chair facing me as I stared at the screen saver.

“Yer alright?” He asked me, shoving his hands into his pocket and biting down on his lip ring.

I nodded slowly, my hands tucked underneath my legs as I swung them back and forth. I looked at him, giving him a small smile and then noticed that he was playing with something in his pocket.

The colour drained in my face as I realized that it was only Oli and I in the office. My mind flashed to him getting down on one knee and asking me 4 questions with his big brown puppy dog eyes and that boyish beautiful smile spreading across his face, reaching his eyes.

I swallowed the lump in my throat, trying to relax. I didn’t want to feel like this every time we are alone, which is pretty much most of them time, especially at the apartment, which is where I wanted to go now, home and then bed.

“Did yer drive ‘ere?” I asked him, breaking the silence between us.

“Nah, Lee dropped me off.” He said, scratching the top of his head, ruffling his hair.

“Shall we go home now?”

Oli nodded and rubbed his palms against his legs, before standing up. He stretched, his arms up high, making his hoodie rise up, giving me that sexy sneaky peak of the top of his ‘RECKLESS’ tattoo, the hairs of his happy tail, disappearing into his boxers.

I pressed my lips together tightly, my imagination going wild with lust filling me.

The sound of Oli’s laughter snapped me out of my fantasy. I looked up at him quickly, regretting it instantly as he grinned at me, showing his teeth. I felt the heat creeping up on my checks as I blushed. I looked away from him, down at the desk, grabbing my bag as I heard him laugh again.

“Damn, yer thinkin’ ‘bout me naked ‘nd doin’ stuff to yer.” He said, cockiness filling his voice.

I pretended to ignore him, ignoring that his statement was true. I got my phone out of my pocket, unlocking it and started to text Gracie, anything other than looking at Oli. Every day felt it was the first month of our relationship, we hadn’t gotten out of the honeymoon stage yet and I hoped we never would. He still had the same effect over me as he always had.

“Don’t act like yer didn’t ‘ear me.” Oli said as he pulled my mobile from my hands, chucking it on the chair. “I know yer want me, just say it.” He smirked, bringing his hands up to my neck, resting them on either side and tucking my hair behind my ear.

“Yer want me too.” I said looking up at him, putting my arms around his waist. He moved into me, making me part my legs so they were either side of him.

“All the bloody time.” He whispered as he leaned in to me, pressing his lips against my jaw.

“Are we gonna do it right ‘ere in the office?” I asked breathlessly as he planted a trail of kisses along my jaw, up my cheek to the corner of my lips.

“Like we haven’t before.” Oli chuckled, his hot breath hitting my lower lip.

I laughed lightly at his comment, remembering those other times. He pressed his lips to mine forcefully, cupping my jaw and sliding one of his hands firmly down my side to my thigh, pulling me closer to the edge, our hips meeting. I ran my hands up his side, round to his shoulders, wrapping my arms around his neck, pressing my entire body to his as I gave myself to him there on the desk in the office.

“Hey babe, we’re home now.” I heard Oli say softly, feeling his fingers brush my skin, tucking my hair behind my ear.

My eyes fluttered open, seeing our apartment building. I turned to Oli, seeing his sweet boyish smile, his dreamy warm eyes gazing at me. I gave him a lopsided smile, closing my eyes again, stretching a little.

“Sleepy is sleepy.” I mumbled my eyes still closed.

Oli chuckled. “I’m such a champ.”

I opened my eyes looking at him with raised eyebrows. “I’m not even gonna comment on that, it’ll only make yer ‘ead bigger.”

Oli laughed loudly, running his fingers through my hair. “I love yer so much Nell.”

I closed my eyes again, a big wide smile spreading across my face. I sighed and opened my eyes again starting at him dreamily. “I love yer too Oli.”

His hand slowly slid down to mine, entwining our fingers together tightly. It was so hard for Oli to zip his pants back up at the office, but we couldn’t stay there all night as much as we liked to though, there was only just so much that I could take. Oli had completely drained me; all I wanted now was to go to bed.

Oli stuffed his hand into his pocket as I leaned my head against his shoulder, my eyes half closed and my legs feeling a big wobbly. I couldn’t wait to get into bed, all snuggled up and toasty. Oli unlocked the door and dragged me inside, kicking the door behind him.

I shuffled quickly to our bedroom, kicking my shoes off, pulling my jeans down and flopped down on top of the covers, grabbing my pillow, lying sideways.

“Do yer want a cup of tea?” I heard Oli ask.

I gave him a thumbs up and heard him chuckle. I smiled as I thought about being with Oli in the office only moments ago, I stretched out and sighed loudly, snuggling into my pillow.

“Hmmm Nell.” I heard Oli mumbled, feeling the bed sink a little as he snuggled up behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist and pulling him right into me.

The smile stayed on my face as I turned around in his arms. I wrapped my arms around his neck tightly, running my fingers up through the back of his hair.

“I’m so glad yer moved in. I love this, I love yer.” Oli said quietly, his lips moving against my forehead. He hugged me tightly, leaving his lips pressed against my skin.

My eyes suddenly snapped open. I suddenly remembered the ring in the draw and how close it was to us. I could hear the draw trying to open, the small black box trying to get out and showing the engagement ring.

“Yeah. This is perfect, just this, right now. This is fine, this is good. Where we are is just fine.”

Oli laughed lightly. “Of course.”

“I don’t want anythin’ to change. This is perfect.” I said firmly.

“What are yer goin’ on ‘bout Nell.” Oli asked curiously, pulling his head back, I could feel his eyes burning into my face. I kept my eyes down and snuggled into him, hiding my face in his neck.

“Nothin’. I mumbled into his neck.

I was glad when we heard Oli’s phone went off so he’d drop the subject and then soon forget about it.

“It’s Matt.” Oli said. “He wants to know if we wanna go to his for a few drinks.”

I groaned, rolling away from him, closing my eyes.

“Alright, I’ll tell ‘im no. Lets ‘ave some alone time.” Oli said, rubbing his hand up and down my side.

My eyes snapped open. Alone time. I gulped, that means that it would only be Oli and I together alone, alone together, together alone. God, what if he is planning to ask me?

I shoot up quickly, turning to him. “No, let’s go.” I said quickly, staring at him wide eyed as he was texting Matt back.

Oli averted his eyes up to me, stopping what he was doing. “I thought yer wanted to go to sleep, thought I had worn yer out.” He said giving me a little smirk.

“I’m fine, let’s go out.” I told him, getting up from the bed and walking over to my wardrobe.

I rummaged around looking for something to wear. I didn’t want to go out, I really just wanted to stay in bed with Oli, but I couldn’t get that damn imagine out of my head of him kneeing down in front of me and opening that little black box.

I pulled my t-shirt over my head and pulled out a floral dress, studying it.

“If yer don’t get into something right now Nell, we will be stayin’ ‘ome.” Oli said loudly, his voice deep.

If I hadn’t had found that stupid little black box I would have used this to my advantage, but seeing as I had and was fearing every second that he was going to ask me, I pulled the dress over my head and grabbed a black jumper, pulling that over as well. I put on a few rings and a necklace, brushed my hair and applied some mascara and black eye liner on the top, nothing too much.

I turned around seeing Oli put back on his jacket, not even bothering to change from his sex clothes. I raised one of my eyebrows at him, my hand on my hip. He slowly stopped what he was doing and looked at me meekly.

“What?” He asked looking confused.

“Are yer seriously gonna go out in those clothes.”

Oli shrugged, not caring. “We had sex right after I finished on stage, I was proper sweaty, yer didn’t care then.”

I rolled my eyes at him, dropping my hand and walked over to him. I wrapped my arms around his waist, grinning up at him.

“Why is nearly everything with us related back to sex?”

“Hmmm, who knows.” He mumbled quietly, wrapping his arms around me leaning down and pressing his lips against mine. “Love yer.”

“Right back at yer.”

“Yer tea is in the kitchen, properly a bit cold now though.” Oli said giving me a small smile, brushing my hair out of my face.

“Thanks.” I pulled my arms away from him and strolled into the kitchen, grabbing the blue mug on the counter top, holding it with both hands. It wasn’t cold, just hot enough to drink and get some energy.

I wandered back into our bedroom; the door was slightly closed so I pushed it open trying to be quiet to see what Oli was doing. I poked my head through the door. My eyes widen as I saw Oli looking through his beside table. My heart began to race quickly, my blood rushing to my face, making me flush.

I shoved the door open, making it hit the wall loudly. “What are yer doin’?” I asked him firmly, frowning at him.

Oli jumped slightly, startled by my big entrance. “Nothin’.” He mumbled, shutting the bedside draw.

“Why did yer jump then?”

Oli frowned at me, stuffing his hands into his pocket. “The bang of the door made me jump s’all. What are yer gettin’ at?”

“Yer actin’ sneaky.” I murmured; bring the mug up to my lips and sipping on tea.

“I aint actin’ anythin’.” He said angrily.

I scowled at him before turning around walking back out of the bedroom, pulling the door behind me. I sat down on the sofa, still a frown across my face, just slipping on my tea. I was annoyed now that I had seen him going through his draw, though it would have been much worst if I was caught off guard with him proposing to me.

At least I knew that he might or might not have the little black box on him, I really wish he doesn’t though. I managed to make him a little pissed off, so perhaps he’s changed his mind now. God, maybe he was going to ask me in front of everyone, that way there wasn’t a chance I could say no or talk to him about it.

I didn’t feel like going out at all now, but I really didn’t want to stay home when it was just us alone. I guess even being around all our friends wasn’t enough to stop the image of him asking me those four questions, it was just replaced with everyone that we knew around us, waiting for me to say YES.

“Yer ready to go?”

I sighed and stood up, finishing the rest of my tea and walked towards the kitchen, not making eye contact with him. I placed the cup in the dishwasher and turned around, seeing Oli leaning against the wall with arms folded. Damn, he looked like a god. I really just wanted it to be us tonight, but I couldn’t stop picturing him kneeing down on one knee, opening up that little black box.

“Let’s go then.”

Oli nodded, turning around and opening the door, I quickly put my shoes on and grabbed my mobile, shutting the door behind me and Oli locked it.

We silently got into the car as Oli started up the engine and backed out. The silence between us was killing me; Oli was so stubborn when it came to petty arguments and wouldn’t talk to me until I spoke first. Maybe it was best that Oli was annoyed with me, that way he wouldn’t even be thinking about anything other than getting drunk tonight.

Once we pulled up outside Matt and Tom’s building, Oli cut the engine and sighed heavily. I knew that meant he wanted to talk to me, but I wasn’t going to. I didn’t want things to be okay between us right now, like him, I wanted a few drinks in me before we spoke.

I slammed the car door forcefully and walked quickly without Oli to the building. I pushed the button of the lift, tapping my foot against the floor, waiting for it. I heard the doors open as Oli came in behind me. I could see him behind me in the reflection on the lift. I really didn’t know how well it would go down being in a small closed space with him. Matt and Tom lived on the 5th floor so it wasn’t that long in the lift, but it would be hard to focus on something other than him.

The lift doors pinned open and I walked in slowly with Oli in toll behind. I leaned against the wall in the far corner as Oli pressed the button and the doors closed a few seconds after. I folded my arms across my chest looking at my shoes. If anything, being in a lift we’d be all over each other right now, doing something naughty.

I sighed, shifting from one foot to the other, feeling a bit fidgety from lack of touch from Oli. Oli was just staring at the buttons, pushing the same one a few times. It was starting to get awkward between us and the silence was killing me.

I bit on my bottom lip, deciding in my head if I should just press myself against him and grab him by the shirt, pulling his lips down to mine taking out my frustration on him that way. I expect him to just give me a sly smirk, closing in on me and kissing me.

The doors pinned open and I was snapped out of my fantasy. Oli was quick on getting out and I slowly followed five steps behind him, my arms still tightly crossed feeling alone.

Oli didn’t knock like I would have, he opened the door and went straight in, leaving it open for me, not even looking back to see if I was still there. Well, fuck, he’s completely pissed at me for nothing and I can’t help but be pissed off right back at him.

“Alright mate?” I heard the well-known voice of Matt say.

I closed the door behind me and sort of stood awkwardly not knowing whereabouts to go.

“Nellieeeeeeeee!”

My head snapped as I saw Gracie coming towards me with a glass in her hand, shoes off and looking a little tipsy.

“Yer alright?” She asked me.

I rolled my eyes. “Just peachy.”

“Let’s get yer a drink.” She smiled, linking her arm with mine and pulling me towards the kitchen, pass Oli, Matt and a few other people. I didn’t look at Oli, but I could feel his eyes on mine.

“Did Tom invite yer?” I asked as Gracie rummaged around to find something for me to drink.

“No, Matt did.” She grinned.

I eyed her skeptically. “Are yer two fuckin’ again?”

Gracie’s face went bright red, averting her eyes away from me.

“Maybe…” She mumbled quietly, taking a sip of her drink.

I rolled my eyes at her and took the drink from her hand, taking a big gulp.

“Woah, slow down there girl.” Gracie said, staring at me wide eyed. “What’s wrong with yer? Yer face is all sour.”

“Just fuckin’ Oli Sykes.” I growled.

“Did he ask yer to marry ‘im?!” She shirked.

“NO!” I yelled at her. “Fuck, shut up ‘bout that.”

“Sorry.” She mumbled.

“No, I’m sorry. I’m just well annoyed at him right now.”

“How comes?”

I sighed. “It’s like over nothin’ ‘nd he is just being so stubborn. I caught him lookin’ through his draw ‘nd asked ‘im what he was doin’ ‘nd then he just got all shitty with me.”

“Doesn’t take much to make ‘im mad then.”

“Nope.” I scoffed and took a long gulp of the beer Gracie gave me.

“So… do yer think he is gonna ask yer tonight then if he was lookin’ through his draw?”

I shrugged. “Dunno, I don’t think so. He’s real stubborn ‘nd wont talk to me until I talk to ‘im.”

“Jus’ go talk to ‘im then.” Gracie said making it sound so easy.

I shook my head. “No, he’s gonna get drunk so there isn’t much point till the morin’.”

“I think yer should talk to ‘im before he gets pissed. He might make a right fool out of himself.”

I laughed lightly. “He doesn’t need to be pissed to make a fool of himself, he can do by himself.”

“I really think yer should talk to ‘im before he gets drunk.” Gracie told me firmly, staring straight at me with a worried expression.

I sighed and glared at her slightly. “Fine, he’s probably drunk already though.” I mumbled putting my drink down on the counter and came out of the kitchen to find Oli doing shots with Tom and Matt.

“Oi.” I said loudly after he gulped it down, his face scrunching up with his tongue out. “I wanna talk to yer.”

Oli looked at me, his expression blank and put down the shot glass on the table, getting up from the sofa walking over to me timidly. I turned around and walked towards the door, opening it and glanced back to make sure Oli was still following me, he shut the door behind and turned around to face me, arms folded and looking at me with raised eyebrows waiting for me to start talking.

“So…” I mumbled, not really sure what to say. We were acting so stupid, all because of that damn ring I found. Maybe I should just come out and ask him why he has it, but what if he really does want to ask me to marry him and gets down on one knee right now.

“So what?” Oli snapped bringing out of my mind.

“Why…are yer actin’ like this.”

“I aint actin’ like anythin’.”

“That right there.” I snapped pointing to him. “Yer being a dickhead now, why?”

“Oh right, yeah, it’s me, I’m being a dickhead, like always.”

“Well yer are! Just listen to yerself. This is just silly. I don’t even know why yer being like this.” I sighed, rubbing my forehead getting frustrated.

“Yer started it by being all weird in the bedroom.”

I wanted to point out that it could have meant two things, but Oli didn’t seem to be in a funny mood right now, though I could see the corner of his lips pulling up in a smirk. He shook his head and ruffled his hair, sighing heavily.

“I was just wonderin’ what yer were doin’, s’all.” I murmured looking down at the floor.

“I wasn’t doin’ anythin’.” He said his voice annoyed.

“Okay then. Sorry.”

“Fuck Nell, I dunno. I guess I’m just a bit tired now ‘nd so are yer. Sorry for snapping.”

I nodded, only half agreeing with him. I was still annoyed that I had found him going through his draw, what if he did have the little black box on him now? I really wanted to push it out of my mind and forget it, just to have fun right now and loosen up.

I jumped slightly, startled by Oli as he wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me into him. I placed my hands on his arms, looking up at him as he leaned down and pressed his lips to mine. I smiled into the kiss, running my hands up his arms, to his shoulders before they moulded into his hair, pulling him closer to me.

When Oli pulled away, the smile was still across my face and one was on his as well.

“How can we go from fuckin’ silly too pissed off?” I laughed, running my hands up and down the back of his neck.

“Dunno love, doesn’t matter. I love yer.”

“I love yer too.” I said softly, pulling him back down to me.

Our lips met again, with much more force and passion. Oli parted his lips and I felt his tongue run along my bottom lip, I parted my lips wider as his tongue met mine, our lips keeping in sync as he hugged me closer to him and I stood on my tippy toes. His lips were red and plumped as we pulled away leaving me gasping for breath.

“Oi yer two fuckers!”

Oli turned around and I leaned to the side to see Tom grinning at us.

“C’mon. Yer honestly can’t wait to get naked later on?”

Oli looked back at me grinning. I laughed and shoved him away from me walking back to Tom. Oli grabbed my hand, lacing our fingers together as he came up behind me, nuzzling his face into the back of my neck. I laughed, squirming away from him as he shut the door behind him.

I pulled Oli to the kitchen to get my beer, but he stopped and I turned around.

“Hang on.” He said letting go of my hand.

My eyes widen and my heart stopped beating as he kneeled down on one knee in front of me.

“What fuck are yer doin’?!” I yelled loudly, not thinking.

Oli’s head shoot up at me with a frown across his face. “What? I’m doin’ my shoe lace up.”

I was breathing heavily and I could feel eyes on us, I gulped and blinked a few times as Oli stared at me oddly before quickly doing up his shoe lace. He stood up abruptly and grabbed my arm, his fingers digging into my skin as he yanked me away from everyone and into the corner of the kitchen.

“What the actually fuck Nell?” He growled towering over me with angry eyes. “What is wrong with yer today? Yer freak out on me in the bedroom ‘bout lookin’ through my draw, yer say that yer wanna stay like this ‘nd don’t want anything to change ‘nd yer flip when I got on one-.”

Bingo.

Oli had gotten it.

He stared blankly at me as I averted my eyes away from his. My heart beating fast and my breathing quicken, being trapped between Oli and the kitchen counter.

“Yer found the ring.” He said quietly.

I nodded still not meeting his eyes. My pulse was racing as the blood rushed to my face making me go bright red. Well, one thing for sure, he wasn’t going to ask me now.

“Oh, fuck sake Nell.” Oli groaned.

I looked up at him meekly; he was rubbing his hand up and down his face grimly. I stared at his tattooed hand, trying to control my heart rate and my fast breathing.

“So…what do yer think?” Oli asked quietly. He dropped his hand from his face and placed both of his hands on the counter either side me, trapping me completely. His eyes were big and looking intently at me.

“Think of what?” I croaked.

“The ring…do yer like it?” Oli asked me, titling his head to the side a little, biting down on his bottom lip, averting his eyes to the ground and slowly back up to me. I’d only see Oli like this a few times; he was acting timid and cute.

“Did yer buy it for…that?” I whispered answering his question with another one, trying to avoid answering any of his.

Oli shook his head. “It’s me mums.”

I eyed him curiously. “Why do yer ‘ave it?”

“She gave it to me at their last anniversary.”

“Oh.” I relaxed knowing now that he hadn’t brought it for me and wasn’t going to ask. “It’s pretty.”

“Yeah it is.” Oli said as he gazed at me, his eyes glassy. “So…what do yer think of it?”

I shrugged, not really sure what to stay and looked away from him. I could hear Gracie’s voice in my mind telling me to just come out with it and tell him how I feel, but I didn’t want to hurt Oli’s feelings. Was this his way of asking me if I wanted to marry him? What about the dog we were getting and the small steps we were going to take together? I felt like Oli was so far away from me, off into the future.

“Too soon?” He answered for me after I hadn’t said anything for a while.

I nodded still not looking at him. He didn’t sound upset or angry, he’s answer was casual and soft. Perhaps he didn’t mean for me to find it and actually wasn’t going to ask me, I just happened to have found it while I was looking for the Drop Dead keys.

“Look, I wasn’t gonna ask yer Nell.” Oli said softly, tucking my hair behind my ear. “Suppose it explains yer weird behaviour today.” He murmured to himself.

“I didn’t mean to freak out.” I told him timidly. “It just caught me off guard, I dunno, I guess it is too soon. We haven’t even started lookin’ for a puppy yet.”

“I know Nell I didn’t expect yer to find it anyways.”

I chewed on the inside of my cheek, my lips twisted tightly to the side of my mouth. Oli placed his fingers under my chin lifting my face up and as he did this I couldn’t help but met his eyes. He looked at me intently biting on his bottom lip, slowly pulling his teeth back against the skin.

“The way yer were actin’ made it seem like yer didn’t wanna marry me at all.” Oli said pouting slightly, his voice sullen and dull.

My heart started beating rapidly; my palms getting clamming and my lips parted slightly, my breathing heavily. I could feel the heat coming off my face as I blushed deeply. I blinked a few times trying to find my voice.

“It…it’s not that Oli. I just-just well its t-t-too soon. I’ve never even lived with a boyfriend before, it’s a big step… but-but, I’m glad I took it. I really love yer so much.” I told him my eyebrows knitted together as I gazed into his warm eyes.

A small cute smile tugged up on Oli’s lips right up to his eyes as he cupped my face and leaned in pecking me on the lips. He pulled back slightly our lips just barely touching and a big wide smile spread across his face, which caused me to smile back at him the same.

I could feel my heart beating rapidly, goose bumps rising up on the back of neck as Oli slid his hands down from my face to the back of my neck and tangled his fingers in my hair.

“I love yer too Nellie. I can’t wait for the next steps with yer.”

Staring at him now made me realize that we were both in the in the same boat. Neither of us was ready for marriage and now I could finally see that Oli was standing right next to me ready to take the next steps in our little perfect piece of heaven together.