Just a Feeling

Luke was standing against the safety rail, facing the moon. “Rowan,” he said quietly.

She froze when she was halfway across the roof to him. What should she say? But she didn’t have to say anything. “I’m sorry, I really am. None of this should have happened to you. I failed you.”

“No, you didn’t. You rescued me.” Luke turned and looked at her. In the moonlight, she could barely make out his expression- a sardonic smile.

“You got yourself out. I just drove the getaway car.”

Rowan shook her head. “That’s not all you did, and you know it.” She walked forward and put her hands on his cheeks, gazing directly into his eyes. He laughed softly, but it was pained.

“I know you believe that.”

Looking into his eyes, Rowan remembered her conversation with Ash. Specifically, she wondered about whether Ash was right- was Luke trying to figure her out?

“He was,” Luke said. Rowan blinked, confused. “Ash was right,” Luke clarified. “I… I’m uncomfortable talking with people unless I know what they expect from me. Unless I understand them. Normally, that’s not hard, considering my… ah, talent. But you, Rowan, you’re different. Harder to peg.”

Rowan blushed, suddenly realizing how close they were. She looked down at her feet, so that he wouldn’t see her eyes and know what she was thinking, which was that, in that moment, she really wanted to kiss him.

“I’m really nothing special,” Rowan said. Luke snorted.

“Sure, Princess. And every other girl out there would have been able to get out of a kidnapping situation and not jump at noises, or look for faces in shadows. You’re brave, and you’re strong. You’re beautiful, inside and out.” Rowan glanced up to see if he was serious- which was silly, since she knew he wasn’t lying- and forgot about his gift.

Luke’s eyes bore into hers, and she blushed.

There could be no secrets from him, not when he could read her thoughts.

He swore and took her face in his hands, leaning down to kiss her.

And what a kiss it was.

Rowan could have died happy in that moment.

Luke pulled away first, and swore again. “This can’t happen,” he said.

Rowan blinked, hurt. “What do you mean?”

“I’m beneath you. I’m your guard, Rowan. Don’t forget that.” His rejection stung. She’d just had her first kiss, and he was already walking away.

Rowan was left standing on the rooftop alone, and Evan showed up not even a minute later, having taken the stairs at a run.

Rowan watched him heaving and had the urge to laugh. She thought better of it, because, judging by the look on Evan’s face, he was not in the mood.

“I don’t know what you said to him, Princess, but it must have been pretty bad for him to leave you alone up here, especially after what happened today. He came sprinting into my room and yelled at me that you couldn’t be left alone and to get my butt up here.”

“What I said to him?” Rowan repeated, affronted. “I didn’t say a word! Oh, that boy,” she seethed. Anger was easier than hurt and confusion. Evan looked at her and tilted his head questioningly. Rowan ignored it.

“I’m going down to my room and to bed. I’ll tell Lane you said good night,” Rowan said, brushing past him and rushing down the stairs.

When she got to her room, she buried her head under her pillow and proceeded to do her very best to block everything and everyone out of her memory.

It was just too much to take in at once.