Déjà vu

I had never felt so uncomfortable in my life.

It was midday Thursday and all I could think about while sitting in sociology class was doing an army roll out the window and running down the street to safety.

We had a new teacher, Mrs. Beadle, and she was quick to confirm her status in the classroom by handing out three detentions in the first 10 minutes of class time. I could tell she knew about what I did to our last teacher, and she was eagerly awaiting the moment I opened my mouth so she could give me one too. I opted to keep it shut.

But this was not where the horror ended, nooo. The worst part was George Holley using all morning to burn a hole in the side of my face with his eyes. I looked over once, meaning to give him a dirty look, but chickened out when I found four pairs of eyes glancing back at me. George was socializing with the usual gaggle of obscenely popular kids – Derek and James, MVP’s in our school basketball team, and Prissy McPrissy-pants….I mean Leanne. She was smiling sweetly at me, the other guys were checking me out more or less, and George was looking as attractive and evil as ever. What did I do to deserve this, oh cruel cruel world?

I dropped my head onto my desk dramatically.

“Annabelle, pay attention!” Mrs. Beadle hollered, slapping a ruler on her desk. I lifted my head quickly and ignored the sniggers of my peers.

I couldn’t believe my luck. I wasn’t sure how much more I could handle.

When the nightmare finally ended, and the bell tinkled for lunch break, I stayed put. It wasn’t that I wanted to be in that class with that woman longer than necessary, I just didn’t want to run into George. He was such a nuisance. I’d been cheated out of my ability to leave class when I wanted because of my burning desire not to run into him.

I waited until every single person was long gone before I closed my humongous sociology folder. Mrs. Beadle was looking at me like she was about to walk over and say something to me, so I shoved all my papers into my school bag and scuttled out the door quickly.

“Hello Annabelle.”

Oh sweet Mary no…

George was standing right in my way the moment I walked out of the room, leaning his arm against the wall. He towered at very least half a foot over me, probably more, and I wasn’t extremely short for a girl either….

“George,” I acknowledged blandly. I tried to step around him, but he moved those annoyingly long limbs into my path. I frowned, “Oi!”

“What class do you have now?” he asked, smiling mischievously.

“I’ve got Popdivology, the study of Pop Divas. Move please.”

He laughed lightly, genuinely, but didn’t move.

In a movement straight out of a Jackie Chan movie, I faked to the right and rolled like a crazy woman to his left, finding a small space and reaching for it.

He grabbed hold of my wrist.

“Ugh, for goodness sakes,” I complained. I couldn’t believe this was happening. Blast this hallway for being so narrow! I secured my huge folder with my other arm, then pulled with everything I had. He was a lot stronger than I was, but I had the determination.

The annoying part was that he was still smiling, and pulling me back towards him too easily.

“Stop for a minute would you—”

“Help help!” I hollered. Several students walking past double took but, seeing who was holding me, ultimately left it. “Stranger danger! I need an adult—”

He pulled me to him with one swift movement, and I was suddenly right at his side, much closer than I was comfortable with. He must have been humoring me before, letting me think that I had some chance of escape.

“Anna, relax okay? I just want to ask you something.”

I frowned deeply, like a child getting put in the naughty corner, but stood still. It seemed like such a desperate struggle now just to get to lunch. I would have to honor him with a minute of my time.

Once he was confident I wouldn’t run away, he let go and stood back.

He smiled and put his hands in his pockets, “Are you busy tonight?”

What. The. Heck.

“Are you asking me out?!” my voice was so high pitched it was almost inaudible.

He shrugged casually and fell back against the wall, but he had a sly knowing smile plastered on that perfect sandy beige face. He liked my reaction, the disbelief in my voice that meant I was shocked beyond belief. What he didn’t know, was that it was not happy shocked.

There was an intense silence. Very intense.

“Yes I’m busy,” I announced.

His face dropped, but he wasn’t sad, just…intrigued. “Are you?”

“No,” I admitted, “I just don’t want to go out with you.”

Thank you very much.

“Hmm…” he murmured, tilting his head at me curiously, not looking thrown off in the slightest.

George spotted something down the corridor behind me and his head jerked up. I looked too and almost squealed with delight. My wonderful friends Harper and Sunny were walking towards us looking mighty confused.

Then, just like that, George gave me one last amused smile and walked away. I couldn’t help but watch him go, praising the earth for the miracle that just occurred.

“What the? Was that George Holley?!?”

I turned around to see Harper squinting past me, checking to see whether it really was him she’d seen.

“He wanted some study notes” I lied pathetically, “I said no.”

The other two girls were silent. Oh, there were two girls with Harper?

“Okay…. Well anyway,” Harper said, gesturing to the tall girl standing beside Sunny, making her look like a child, “this is Sofia.”

“Hey,” The girl said, flicking her hand up and doing a cute little wave thing. Her voice was cute too, and so was her little handbag and her outfit, which quickly lead me to believe she had a great big wardrobe.

This was the fashion model though right? She was definitely tall enough, sheesh. Her little voice and her little handbag where the only little things about her. Harper was wrong too, she didn’t look like an alien, she had perfect cocoa skin and short dark hair; she was very beautiful. Too thin maybe, but she seemed sweet enough.

“Who was that?” Sofia searched through the swarm of people in the hallway, “George did you say?”

Ugh, one fleeting look and George already had her whipped.

“Yeah George Holley,” Harper scoffed, “Good luck trying to get him….actually, you might be able to. You’re a model right?”

Sofia shrugged, but laughed a little bit arrogantly, “Well not here yet, but I’ve got some interviews at agencies next week. Mom says I need to get my studies sorted out first.”

Harper nodded and laughed along, but I didn’t see anything funny, either did Sunny. Alright, I got somewhat of a bad vibe from her. I wasn’t a judgmental person usually and she had barely even spoken to me, so I’d keep my mouth shut.

Harper began showing Sofia the way out to our lunch spot, “We have a nice spot outside when it’s a nice day. You get a nice view of the….”

I fell into step behind them next to Sunny. She was being very quiet. I glanced over to her, but she was looking ahead with her chin up like any other day.

I patted her on the head, “You okay?”

“Yeah,” she responded with a smile, but something was definitely off. I’d ask her about it later.

------

Sofia was in photography class with me and Harper that afternoon; that was my first opportunity to really talk to her. Yes, she was nice, a little bit shy even, but as soon as you got her talking about herself she would completely open up. Harper was doing everything humanely possible to over enthusiastically make her feel welcome; whether that was because she felt like Sofia was her responsibility or because she genuinely thought she was great, I didn’t know.

A quick Piano lesson after school, followed by a lovely family dinner and 30 minutes of leftover homework led to me to mental exhaustion. I hit that sack early.

But alas, twas not meant to be. The second my head hit the pillow, Hazel came into my room, no knocking necessary.

“It’s Sunny,” she announced, chewing gum quite loudly, “Why are you in bed? It’s only, like, 8.30?”

I lifted my head groggily and saw she was holding the home telephone out like it was a great nuisance to her. I hauled my body out of bed and took it.

“Sunny, whats up?” I asked, turning away from Hazel and glancing out the window.

“Oh I’m so sorry, did I wake you up?”

“No no it’s fine,” I assured her, “I was just having a Nana moment.”

“I’m so sorry! I didn’t know, I never would have called if I had. I thought it might have been too late, I can talk to you tomorrow—”

“—just breathe April.”

I could hear her taking a few deep breaths through the receiver. Hazel, for some reason, hadn’t left my room. The constant moving of her jaw was starting to annoy me.

I mouth the words ‘what do you want?’ and she shrugged.

“Can I take your hair straightener for school tomorrow?” she asked nonchalantly, as if she was expecting to get it anyway, “Adam wants me to be in his photography project so I get out of class first period and—”

I quickly picked up the hair utensil and pushed it in her direction. The moment she took it I ushered her out the door before she could ask for anything else.

I directed my attention back to the phone. “Right, Sunny, how are things?”

“Umm good. I just wanted to talk to someone.”

“I’m all ears.” I flopped backwards onto my bed, making myself comfortable.

“I don’t have anything in particular I want to say. Just tired of studying.”

“Tell me about it. I just finished the last of my history – phew. Hard work. Miss Nowitski better appreciate it tomorrow. I’ll be one of the first for once!”

“Not the first though…”

“Oh no, of course not. That’s where you take up permanent residence. Nerd, cough….”

“Hey, don’t hate the player,” she laughed, “Oh yeah, what are you taking to the picnic on Saturday?”

“Erm, I hadn’t even thought about it.”

“I’m making lemon muffins with white delight frosting. Mom’s also making a fruit platter…. She insisted…”

“Hey don’t take all the ideas! Hmm…let me think….”

“Bake a cake?”

“don’t have the patience.”

“Savories?”

“Don’t have any.”

“mini hot dogs?”

“Eww..”

“Well I don’t know then!”

“Looks like I’ll be taking a trip to the store after school tomorrow. You wanna join the adventure?”

“What time after school?”

“Like, straight.”

“No can do, I have to tutor some juniors.”

“Guess it’s a solo mission. I’ll walk down and get papa to pick me up afterwards on the way back from work.” That was a shame, I wanted to heckle her more about her weirdness today. Guess I would just have to do it now, “…hey Sunny?”

“Hmm?”

“Are you okay?”

“…yes. Why do you ask?”

“Something’s off. You were acting strange today at school.”

Silence. I knew it, something was definitely wrong. I listened to the crickets chirping through the receiver for a while before I decided to encourage her a bit, “well, what do you think of Sofia?”

“Do you think I’m pretty Anna?”

That absolutely blew my mind. She most certainly was! But why on earth was she asking? It was not like her.

“Umm….well duh?! I know you're pretty. Where did this come from?”

“I’m tired of being the ugliest in our group.”

“What!?”

“I hate it. I try and wear more makeup and dress like you but I just look gross. You and Harper and really cool and chic and Rachel is a beauty queen, and now there’s a stupid super model walking around with us!”

Stupid model? I had never heard her hate on anyone….

“Sunny whoa hold up! You're way out of line here.”

“It’s true though….”

“There is no ugliest or prettiest okay? No such thing. We’re all too different to compare.”

“I just find myself sitting with all you girls and wishing I was more like you.”

“That’s not unusual. I wished I had Sofia’s sky high legs today, and more than a few times a day I wish I was half as clever as you Sunny.”

“But I’m not pretty.”

“You are! You’ve got your own style. It’s totally you and you pull it off without a hitch. Your hair as well, it’s always been the edgiest. I don’t have the guts to do anything with mine.”

“Because your hair is absolutely perfect the way it is. You’re like the women in the Palmolive commercials.”

“For goodness sakes. Sunny, why are you so hung up on this all of a sudden?”

I know it sounded mean, but I wanted to slap her. She needed one. I only got silence through the receiver now, she was thinking about whether to tell me the truth or not....

“Did George really ask you for study notes today?”

I just about ripped out my hair. Why did everyone’s life revolve around George? He was the stem of every single problem I had at that moment, and he was just about to plant another seedling. Not my sweet little Sunny though, I wouldn’t let him mess with her too!

“….no. He didn’t.”

She gasped and pushed further, “Well what did he want?”

I fumbled around for an appropriate answer, but she got impatient.

“Does George like you, did he tell you? Is that why he stares at us all the time, because of you?”

Her questions were snappy, so she meant business. Even though she’d had a few none serious boyfriends over the years, I’d never really heard her fuss over a boy before. Not even George. And here she was, putting herself down because of him.

“This ain’t right. Sunny, what the heck is going on with you?” I growled, not wanting to be grilled about something so stupid.

“I just want to be noticed sometimes.... and I thought maybe he was interested in me. But of course not, it’s you and your luxurious hair and perfect skin and flat stomach.”

“Sunny—”

“What did he want??”

“I love you Sunny, but I don’t think you should be getting upset about this.”

“ Did he ask you out on a date?”

It was so rare to hear Sunny being so pushy.

“No,” I sighed angrily, “he asked me what class I had next.”

Yes. Correct answer, grilling over, no lying required.

“…what?”

“He’s a weirdo, God knows what that kid is thinking.”

“Oh…”

She sounded full of remorse. Had she gone the whole afternoon thinking George and I were an….item?? Eww bleugh. The fact that it made her upset made me wanna punch the guy.

“You don’t usually let things like this get to you,” I stated quietly. I tried to push how riled up I was out of the conversation.

“No….I just… I don’t know…”

“Please don’t tell me you’re interested in him? Because I’m going to have to say I highly disapprove. You know what he’s like…”

“Well… yes. But everyone likes the idea of having a George right?”

“Yes, the idea maybe. It’s just an idea though, nothing real about it.”

“You’re right. I’m being an idiot about nothing....”

“Yes. You are. An evil sod like that is not allowed to make my beautiful friend think she’s ugly.”

“Annabelle Crosset, you sweetheart.”

I heard her giggle through the receiver. Mission accomplished - upset Sunny reverted back to awesome Sunny.

“I’ll let you get back to sleep and I’ll see you at school tomorrow.”

“Sounds good.”

I threw the phone onto the egg chair in the corner of my room and covered my face with my hands. If I was mentally exhausted before, what the the hell was I now? Brain fried.

There were two things that never failed to piss me off, the first being when somebody upset my friends, and the second being George Holley. When the two galaxys met, I became extreme hot tempered, frazzled Anna, and it wasn't pretty.

It looked like I was going to have to change my tactic with persistent George. I could no longer be seen with him. He was going to have to go cold turkey, I was going to completely ignore him. No exceptions.

But easier said than done.