They're Gonna Eat Me Alive

First

Ryan was exhausted. He really was— so he couldn’t understand why he couldn’t fucking sleep. Okay, maybe he could understand why. It was the night before Panic! At The Disco’s first ever performance in front of a crowd larger than they were used to. Ryan was afraid that he would fuck up—that he'd fall on his face when he went out on stage, forget his music… just something would go wrong. And who would want to listen to a band that couldn’t even handle being on stage?

Ryan sighed and rolled onto his side in the hotel bed in the hotel room he was sharing with Brendon. Brendon was sleeping on a separate bed that was next to Ryan’s and Ryan watched him as he snored softly. Ryan kind of wished that Brendon was awake right now because he knew that Brendon could easily help Ryan relax just by telling him that everything would be fine and that they were going to do great. It was that simple. But Brendon was the only one that could comfort Ryan with those words. He always felt worse if Spencer or Brent said those same phrases.

Finally deciding that it would benefit everyone in the end, Ryan slid out of his bed and sat on the edge of Brendon’s bed. He shook Brendon gently and a moment later, his eyes were fluttering open and staring sleepily up at Ryan.

“What’s up?” Brendon muttered before yawning loudly.

“I can’t sleep,” Ryan said. “I keep thinking about tomorrow and how I’m going to fuck everything up.”

“You’re not going to fuck anything up Ryan,” Brendon said. “Tomorrow is going to be perfect. There’s nothing to worry about.”

Ryan smiled through the darkness, already feeling some comfort from his words. It was in that moment that Ryan made a decision. It wasn’t something he had been planning—it had come to him just now.

“Brendon?” Ryan said nervously.

“Yeah?” Brendon said.

“Umm… well,” Ryan started to say, unsure of how to actually ask what he wanted to ask. Moments before, he had gotten the urge to kiss Brendon. He had gotten the urge to do so before, of course, but he had never felt it this strongly. He had almost decided to go for it. Almost. “Never mind.”

Ryan was about to get off of Brendon’s bed, but Brendon suddenly sat up and stopped him.

“Wait,” Brendon said. Ryan turned to look at Brendon, and was surprised at how close their faces were to each other. Brendon moved his face ever so slightly closer to Ryan’s. Taking this as an invitation, Ryan felt brave again and moved until his lips were touching Brendon’s. It lasted for only a moment, but it was enough for Ryan to know that it was much better than he imagined it would be. “Do you want to sleep in my bed?”

Silently, Ryan nodded his head and crawled under Brendon’s blankets. Curled next to Brendon, Ryan didn’t have any trouble falling asleep.
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This story is not going to be long-- Each chapter will be a bit further in the future than the last chapter. I'm not going to say how long it's been since the previous chapter, for example, in the next chapter, I'm not going to tell you how much time has passed. All you need to know is that the next chapter will take place some time in the future, and so on. I apologize if that's confusing, but maybe it'll make sense once I've posted more.

I'm not sure how long this story will end up being. It may only end up being a few chapters, but we'll see. This was originally just going to be a one shot, but I thought it'd be better to just break it into chapters.

Anyways, sorry this author's note is so long. Comments are appreciated!

~Sally