Stay.

It was over.

Mikayla knew it was over and done with almost 2 months ago but she couldn’t digest it. She couldn’t digest that she and Sidney were done, over, completed.

It wasn’t official, Sidney hadn’t even said any of the famous break up lines to her, but Mikayla already knew it was inevitable.

Almost 7 months ago was when it started. Sidney kept distancing himself, putting hockey and every other little thing he did before Mikayla and their relationship. It had gotten so bad that the ”couple” don’t even touch physically unless they go to some kind of hockey event with each other.

Even during the events, it’s all fake. The happiness, the secret smiles, all of it- fake. It killed Mikayla every time she saw him, she felt as though someone was repeatedly stabbing her in her tender heart and that person was almost always Sidney. The way he walked by her every day in their own home, not even a glance her way.

Mikayla didn’t even know this man anymore. The man she had known since she was 18, fresh out of Pittsburgh University. That was where they had met and later it turned into something more. Now she’s almost 22, and she’s wasted 3 years on this man, a man she didn’t even know.

For the past month Mikayla had been putting away money, saving it in a bank account that only she knew about. She had been apartment hunting on the other side of the city, the farthest she could get from him that she wouldn’t lose everything she had ever known. Just yesterday she had found the perfect place, it was a studio type apartment and closing on it was only 3 days from now.

Today Mikayla had started packing her things, putting her clothes into suitcases and her books and such into boxes that she would have friends come and get for her. She planned on telling Sidney tonight, if he actually came home at a decent hour and didn’t go straight to their room.

Mikayla often didn’t sleep in the same room as Sidney; mostly it was the couch or the guest bedroom. It was only when she was pathetic enough to crawl in there and she would always be receiving light snores from Sidney but that would be all. They were like roommates that didn’t even know each other rather than a couple who had been together for 2 and a half years.

Ironically the day of closing would be the official anniversary for the couple, marking 3 years on the 22nd of January. That day would be hard for her, she knew already that it would be, but she promised herself that she would try and get through it with as little tears as possible.

As Mikayla packed she came across a picture of her and Sidney. It was right after he won the Stanley, one of the happiest memories she had. In the picture it was of Mikayla and Sidney caught in a lip lock while their families looked on with happy faces.

A single tear dropped onto the picture and she wiped it away before getting up and placing it on their newly made bed. Mikayla took a deep breath, zipping up her last suitcase and adding a few more things into boxes.

The door opening causing Mikayla to look up toward the doorway suddenly and stand up. She ran a hand through her hair and walked out into the kitchen where Sidney was drinking a water bottle.

“Sidney?” She asked, he turned but didn’t connect his eyes with hers. She exhaled sharply, her anger building up from that one little thing.

“I just came to tell you that I’m moving out. Obviously things are over between us, they have been since about 7 months ago. I found an apartment and I’m closing on Friday. I just thought I let you know.” Mikayla told him sharply, her voice cutting through the silence in the kitchen as she glared at the floor. She turned to leave when Sidney’s voice cut her short.

“Why the fuck are you leaving Mikayla?” Sidney asked. Mikayla whipped around, her face a blanket of no emotion.

“Why am I moving out? Seriously Sidney, I know you aren’t that oblivious. For the past 7 months it was like we were already broken up. I don’t even know you anymore. You come in and then you go out, not even a look toward me, not a kiss, not an I love you. But I’ve gotten used to it, I was there when you needed me but other than that you just left me aside. I got the hint Sidney, loud and clear.” She spat at him, her eyes turning into an icy glare before storming back totheir his room and grabbing her things. She pushed all the boxes she couldn’t take into her closet before rolling out her suitcases.

“Goodbye Sidney.” She told him as she passed. Obviously he was still in shock since he was still gazing at the place she had once stood. She got out of the apartment quickly, locking the door and putting all her things into the car before driving off to start her new life,without Sidney.

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2 months had passed and Mikayla was sure they had to be the toughest months of her life. She had to deal with the stress of finding money to pay the bills and her depressed state didn’t help any of that. It was hard, she wasn’t going to lie. It was hard without Sidney here, she was torn apart inside.

She had one of the guys from the team drop the last of her boxes off almost 24 hours after she had left, which was tougher than she expected. She hadn’t talked to Sidney and no one she knew brought him up, which surprised her.

As she walked around her apartment, cleaning up the place since she had nothing better to do, a knock at her door sounded. She frowned slightly, she had told Elise, her best friend, that she didn’t want company today.

Elise had grown worried about Mikayla when she saw how hard this whole thing was on her. Mikayla wasn’t as happy as she was; actually she was rarely ever happy or even smiling for that matter. Causing Elise to go into over mode to make Mikayla happy and to be there at all times.

Mikayla sighed and flipped her hair into a messy bun and went over to open the door. She opened her mouth to tell Elise to go home but her lips were suddenly covered by someone else’s. Mikayla would have fought to get this person off of her if they hadn’t felt so familiar.

The person’s hands came up and cupped her sallow cheeks, rubbing their thumb across her high cheekbones.

Slowly they pulled apart and Mikayla’s eyes met Sidney’s and a strangled gasp made its way out of her throat. She pulled away from his grasp and she finally noticed Sidney’s appearance. She saw how red his eyes were from what she assumed was lack of sleep, how haggard his face seemed, his hair obviously needed a cut and he definitely didn’t shave very well. It was weird seeing Sidney like this since he always had a thing about hygiene.

“Sidney?” She whispered, making sure it was actually him. He nodded slowly, his eyes darkening and Mikayla took a long deep breath. She looked back up at him and he searched her eyes. She wasn’t sure what for but obviously he saw it since he pulled her into him.

Tears sprung to Mikayla’s eyes and she buried herself deeper into his warm chest. Sidney felt a few tears slip down his own cheeks and he felt her move closer to him.

He walked them into Mikayla’s small apartment that was seemingly barren. He sat them both down on the bed and he buried himself in her hair. He felt her shake and he held her tighter.

“I’m so, so sorry Mikayla. I love you so, so much.” He whispered repeatedly and Mikayla responded by moving herself onto his lap, moving her face up to his neck rather than his chest.

Together they cried for their loss, their heartbreak and now what seemed to be the cure, sitting right in front of each other.

Slowly Mikayla pulled her face out of his warm neck, tear streaks going down her face and she wiped Sidney’s away gently.

“Mikayla, I’m so incredibly sorry. I fucked up, I fucked up big time and you, you had every right to leave me. I just snapped out of whatever I was in as soon as you walked out of that door. I wanted so badly to beg you to stay but I knew you wouldn’t. I didn’t deserve for you to stay.” He told her, his voice cracking every few words from his raw throat.

“But Mickey, I love you so much. I love you more than words can explain and I want you back. I want you back home, to stay. I can’t stand being away from you any longer. I-I got the picture, the one of us you left on the bed. I looked at it every night Mik, I have it right here. And I want to be like that again, I want to make you feel like the beautiful woman you are, and I want you to remember that I don’t deserve you, I don’t deserve your love but I’m going to treat you in a way that will try and compare to how you should be treated. I love you Mickey, I love you so much.” He told her, using his old nickname for her making tears come back out of her eyes once again.

And for the first time in almost 3 months, Mikayla smiled. She smiled a true genuine smile that made her cheeks hurt from being so wide. She pulled Sidney to her, kissing him with everything in her.

“I love you too Sidney, don’t ever forget that.”

<3