Save Me From My Nightmare

Knocking on the door woke me from my light slumber, causing me to sigh as I looked towards the door. A huge bouquet of lilies blocked my view of whoever came in, making me smile slightly as a little girl with blonde hair trotted in behind them.

Holly smiled brightly, stretching her arms out for a cuddle but they were slapped away by Zacky who’d put the flowers in a vase by the bed. Shooting him a glare, I picked her up with a wince and sat her next to me on the bed. Her head rested on my good shoulder, her small hand rubbing my sore tummy as if to magically make me better with her tiny fingers. I pressed a soft kiss on her head and ran a hand through her hair.

‘How’re you feeling?’ Zacky asked in a small voice as he pulled up a chair next to the bed, his hand rested on my knee as I shrugged my shoulders. Letting a deep breath escape his plump lips, he rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. Smiling as best I could, I took his hand and rubbed my thumb over his skin as I told him not to beat himself up for what happened to me.

‘Yeah, but, if I’d have reacted a little faster than you wouldn’t have lost the baby and be so fucked up and left here in hospital.’ Letting a tear dribble down my cheek, I turned away from him and looked down at Holly. I gulped and kept quiet.

Zacky went quiet as realisation sunk into him. When I looked up at him again, his eyes met mine in a painful embrace that tore my heart in two. I couldn’t stand watching the agony swimming in his eyes, they made my whole body tighten and lurch.

‘It wasn’t Iain’s kid, was it?’ Zacky asked quietly, locking his fingers between mine. I shook my head a no, trying my best to show some form of emotion that would fit in with the situation.

But, I just didn’t know what to do. I didn’t know how to feel or what to say. The whole world around me seemed to spin in circles of frustration, rendering me helpless against the choking sobs that stopped the airflow to my lungs.

‘Holly, go and sit with Uncle Brian for a moment. Daddy and Auntie Keeley need to talk for a moment.’

Holly kissed my tear-stained cheek before allowing Zacky to help her jump down from the bed before she disappeared out the door towards the seat where Brian was sipping his coffee quietly. I tried to wipe away my tears but he beat me to it, his thumb sweeping over my cheek softly as he pulled the chair a little closer to the bed.

Pathetically, I lulled my head back onto the pillow and looked straight up into the ceiling.

‘You know their forcing an enquiry into Iain; apparently he’d been abusing women in Scotland which was why he moved over here. They’d been looking for him for a while.’

I put my hand up, not wanting to hear any more as I shut my eyes. Fingers moved the hair away from my face softly as he whispered an apology.

‘I know. They’ve questioned me for a statement so he can go to prison. But I refused. I can’t do it, he’ll come after me again when he gets out and this time he’ll kill me,’ I replied in an even tone of voice, not bothering to open my eyes as I knew I’d be met by those beautiful orbs that would persuade me otherwise against my decision. A hand slipped under my chin, forcing me to look to see what was going on. When I did, those beautiful green eyes filled with tears looked down at me.

‘Don’t. There’s nothing I can do to bring the child back so just… don’t go there.’ I turned over to look away from him.

Zacky sighed, his hand resting on the side of my waist with his thumb dancing over the bandage. My breathing slowed to a calm, hypnotised rhythm as my eyes closed quietly. His touch made me serene, my tears stopping suddenly as I allowed the sensations to take over my body and relief the pain. It was like a natural remedy, the rhythm of his thumb running over my body as his fingers tangled through my hair.

‘Amazing,’ Zacky whispered softly as I scooted backwards to get closer to him. My back hit the metal bar of the bed, the metallic coolness making me shiver. ‘That two per cent chance you could ever get pregnant, and it was my child.’ The movement of his thumb didn’t stop, only kept going like a ticking clock.

‘I would have made a terrible mom anyway. I wouldn’t have been able to protect it from Iain, I couldn’t even protect myself let alone a child,’ I whimpered.

Zacky lifted himself from his chair, his thumb being removed from my side. The losses of his touch made me whine quietly under my breath, willing him to return his hand and soothe my nerves again. The bed sunk as someone sat beside me, pushing me across the bed to make room for them as warmth heated my back.

Zacky was lying beside me, his fingers tickling my cheek as he kissed my hair softly. His breath beat against my ear, tickling my skin like a repetition of feathers being stroked over my flesh. The air from his nose blew through my hair as he buried his face in the soft strands, tickling my neck.

‘You would have been the most amazing mom on the planet. Look at how you treat Holly. You put yourself through agony to lift her onto the bed, you put your life on the line to stop her from getting hurt, you lied about being her parent when she needed some back up,’ Zacky listed, stroking my sore stomach soothingly as my eyes closed once more, allowing the words to slide through my mind like a well composed melody.

His voice was a lullaby to my ears, my own personal pain relief. The thought that ran through my mind of him being my own little lullaby made me giggle slightly, allowing a soft smile to appear on my lips as I turned my head around.

‘What’re you thinking?’ A soft kiss below my earlobe made me shudder again.

‘That you’re my beautiful lullaby.’