Call Me Cliché

Then everything came into my sight again once I opened up my eyes. Seth was staring at me with his blood red eyes, and a pierced eyebrow arched up.

“YOU WON’T GET INTO MY PANTS!” I screamed at him, and turned around to run away before I stripped down to give away my virginity. His eyes were screaming me too. But not literally, because eyes don’t talk, but if they did, his eyes would have such a gorgeous voice.

Running in five inch heels was hard, so it looked like I was a new born horse walking around after birth; all wobbly and stuff. Seth couldn’t catch up to me though, for he was making out with a picture of me.

I knew this for I looked over my shoulder to see him, and this obviously meant he hated me too, but secretly loved me.

Then I tripped over my feet. I closed my eyes, expecting to hit the cement, but I didn’t. For someone had caught me.

I looked up at them, still wrapped in his arms, leaning over the cement. I gasped at who it was.

It was EDWARD CULLEN.

He looked exactly like Robert Pattinson! It was so unbelievable!

“Edward Cullen?” I gasped, realizing I had a voice to communicate with. I was using my hand before to try communicating with him.

He dropped me with a disgruntled look on his face. “God damnit, I’m not Edward fucking Cullen. I’m ROBERT PATTINSON. I play a sparkling vampire who is probably gay because he doesn’t want to have sex with Bella in Twilight. A movie. Which ISN’T REAL! I’m a real person, with feelings, who wants to be treated like a human being and not a homosexual vampire!” Edward started sobbing towards the end of his rant.

I hugged him, and he leaned into my shoulder, his tears soaking my white blouse. Patting his back, I whispered comforting, “It’s okay Edward. I love vampires. Even gay ones, like you.”

Edward pulled away, a disgusted look on his face, his eyeliner and mascara running, and shouted, “You are so mean! And for the last time I’m not Edward, I’m Robert!” Then he ran away, flopping his arms in a seizing manner. He ran past Seth, hitting him, which caused Seth to pause in making out with the photo of me.

He looked around him, then looked towards me, and quickly hid the picture of me behind his back.

“Did you see that?” he asked, scared. Even though he was a bad ass, and didn’t have emotions.

“See what? That you were making out with a photo of me? Why no, I did not see that,” I answered, playing dumb. His face contorted into anger, and he stomped his foot, whining, “I was not!”

“Yes you were,” I teased, smiling. Seth dropped the picture of me, and ran towards me. He ran so fast, I could barely see him, but he obviously didn’t run as fast as me.

Something collided into my stomach, and I was pushed back onto the cement.

Then I blacked out, with Seth lying on top of me, mumbling, “I love you sweetie, even though I knocked you out.”