Time to Change

It was Friday. It was finally Friday. The day that Eli thought would never come. She had her last final of the day that morning—some joke of an essay she had to write on journalistic styles and comparing two writers. She could've done that in her sleep—her major wasn't journalism for no reason at all. She set her mechanical pencil down (number two pencils were so high school) and grabbed her bag, tossing the strap of it over her shoulder, before she walked up to the desk. She set down her blue book, wished her professor a successful summer, and walked out of the room.

The door shut silently behind her and she dug her phone out of her pocket. She was going to text Alex to find out where he was, when he'd be in town—she had spoken to him the night before but he never said when he was going to show up. She really wanted him to join her and James for lunch so she could introduce them—it would be a lot less awkward without the rest of the guys around. She was busy texting on her phone—so busy that she didn't realize she had run into someone until her phone fell out of her hand.

She groaned, rolling her eyes. “Watch where you're going, bro,” she muttered, reaching down to pick up her phone.

“Watch your whore mouth, Carter.”

Eli paused, her phone slipping from her grasp again, as she looked up and met those familiar, dark, darki brown eyes that belonged to her best friend. “Oh my God, Alex!” She didn't think twice about jumping right on him, wrapping her arms around his neck, and hugging him so tight that it hurt her—and probably him as well.

Alex's arms were wrapped around her waist in an instant, burying his face in the crook of her neck. It had been so long since he hugged her, held her. It was those kinds of moments that made him never want to leave. He could feel her heart pounding and he knew his was too. “I missed you so much, Carter.”

“You can never leave for so long ever again,” she muttered against his neck. She didn't want to cry—she refused to cry. But she was overwhelmed with so many emotions that she couldn't help it. A tear or two (or, okay, maybe more) slipped from her eyes and it was then she realized just how much she missed him. And it was more than just talking to him—they spoke every day; it was the hugs when she was down, the cuddling when she needed a friend, and the silence when there were no words.

“I wish I never had to,” Alex whispered. For the first time in years, he felt complete. Since he had dated Lisa, hugs were sparse—he never really felt the need. But with Eli, it was different; she was the one that he would do anything for. He never realized just how broken he felt until he laid eyes on her, touched her, because it was then that he actually felt...whole.

“Why didn't you call me and tell me—“

“Dead leg!” Lauren screamed, running out of nowhere and kicking Alex hard behind the knee, causing him to fall with Eli falling on top of him.

“Jack! Control your fucking woman!” Alex yelled, rubbing the back of his head and groaning.

Eli laughed, despite the fact that she had scraped her knees in the fall, and rolled off of Alex. She stood up and enveloped her best friend in a hug. “I missed you, Lauren!”

“I missed you, too, Eli!”

“You're not allowed to leave either,” Eli said, smiling. And it couldn't have been a better way to end her college career; her best friends meant everything to her.

“It's this freak who keeps making me leave you,” Lauren said, pointing over her shoulder to Jack.

Eli's smile widened as she shared hugs with Jack, Rian, and finally Zack. “Why didn't any of you tell me you were coming earlier? I have a lunch I have to go to,” she said, her voice sad. She really didn't want to cancel her plans with James but, well, she knew she would if Alex asked her to.

“With boyfriend?” Alex asked, walking over to their little group and wiping the dirt off of the back of his skinny jeans.

Eli bit the inside of her cheek to hold back a sarcastic remark. “Yes,” she said softly.

“Why don't you cancel and go out to lunch with Alex?” Lauren suggested. “I'm sure you guys have a lot to catch up on.”

Alex ignored the pointed look that Lauren sent him and he shrugged. “No, it's okay. We're all going out to dinner tonight, right?” he asked Eli.

“It's tradition,” she agreed.

“Hey, Alex, why don't you go to lunch with them?” Jack said, raising his eyebrows when Eli couldn't see him.

Alex frowned. “I don't think it's a good idea for me to interrupt a couples' lunch,” he said.

“I think it'd be a good idea,” Lauren agreed. “I mean, the best friend has to approve of the boyfriend, right? That's how we always played it,” she reminded her best friend.

Eli sighed softly. “I'm sure James wouldn't mind if you joined us, Alex.”

“Would you mind?” Alex asked quietly.

“I'll never say no to you—to hanging out with you,” she corrected herself.

Alex smiled. “Then a lunch for three sounds fantastic.”

+

We're going to need an extra seat.

James was confused when he read Eli's text message but listened anyway, beckoning the waitress over and asking her to add another place setting. His girlfriend was set to arrive in less than three minutes and he was very curious as to who the third guest would be. He looked up just in time to see her familiar red hair finding its way through the crowd, a man following closely behind her; a man who apparently didn't get the memo that eighty-five degree weather was too warm for a beanie.

“Hi, James,” Eli greeted him, smiling.

James smiled, leaning in for a kiss and felt a tremendous blow to his ego when she turned just in time, his lips brushing her cheek instead. “How was your last exam?”

“I think I did well,” Eli said.

Alex cleared his throat, in a manner that would never be considered subtle, and smiled down at Eli.

“James, this is my best friend, Alex Gaskarth. Alex, this is my boyfriend, James,” Eli introduced, feeling only slightly awkward.

Alex smiled (though Eli could tell it wasn't genuine) and shook his hand. “Nice to meet you.”

“Nice to meet you, too,” James said, his tone clipped, as he wrapped an arm around Eli's waist, pulling her slightly closer.

Eli looked between them for a minute, not missing the looks on both of their faces. Every time Alex would smile and look at her, James would pull her closer. It felt almost as if they were fighting each other without even moving; and it wasn't something Eli wanted to be caught in the middle of. She withdrew herself from James arm and crossed her own over her chest.

“So... Who's hungry?” she asked.

+

“I can't believe you're dating that guy!” Alex exclaimed loudly as Eli led him out of the restaurant.

She frowned. “Can you keep your voice down?”

“He can't hear me over his own ego, Eli,” Alex snapped.

“Shut up,” Eli muttered. She let go of his arm and started walking faster. Really, she just wanted to leave Alex behind. She shouldn't have been surprised by his behavior at lunch—she knew he was gonna mess it up somehow. But of course she let him go. She was stupid to think that they would ever get along.

“So, what, now you're going to ignore me?” he asked.

“Maybe then you'll know how I felt all through lunch. Both of you were too busy dick measuring to notice my discomfort,” Eli said.

“Well, mine is obviously bigger,” Alex told her.

Eli rolled her eyes and scoffed. She turned right at the corner and kept walking towards her apartment.

“Eli, stop ignoring me.”

Nothing.

Alex sighed, keeping right on her heels as he followed her in silence to her apartment. When she nearly slammed the door in his face, he let out a less than manly squeal. “What the hell!”

“Did I invite you in?” Eli asked, a hand on her hip.

“Not in so many words,” Alex said. “Look, I just don't know why you're dating him. He looks like a fucking football player for God's sake!”

Eli frowned. “So what kind of guy should I date, then? What would be aesthetically pleasing to you, Alex? Since you're now the one deciding who I date,” she snapped.

“Not someone like him,” he muttered.

Eli sighed.

“He's an asshole, Eli!”

“No, he's not!”

“Are you too blinded by his perfectly white smile to see that?”

“Oh, God forbid I date someone with nice teeth!” Eli exclaimed.

“He's rude. He talks over you—“

“I didn't get a chance to say anything, Alex!”

“He orders for you—“

“He knows what I like to eat!”

“Oh, please! Do you not remember what you used to always say about guys who did that? That they're pretentious assholes and, if you guy ever did that, you'd set them straight. Have you set him straight yet?” he asked. It wasn't even so much that he didn't like James (though he didn't), it was more about the fact that he didn't recognize who Eli became when James was around.

Eli bit her lip, refusing to reply. Okay, that struck a chord. She didn't think Alex would've remembered any of that. And maybe she was mad that he had; but maybe she was more angry by the fact that he was right. “He's a good guy, Alex,” she managed to say. “He tells me I'm pretty, he opens the door for me, he—“

“God, Eli, you're not so naïve as to think it's because he really likes you, are you? Guys only do that for one reason—so girls put out,” Alex said.

“Is that how you wooed Lisa?” Eli asked.

Alex scoffed. “Don't bring Lisa into this.”

“Oh, so you can attack my boyfriend, but I can't bring up your girlfriend? You wanna talk about James' shortcomings, which I have yet to see, when you look past Lisa's at every turn. You tell me I'm your best friend but you let her drive a wedge between us! She blames me for every single thing that goes wrong in your relationship and you don't even defend me!” Eli yelled. She didn't want to yell at him, she didn't; but she had been holding it in for far too long.

Alex sighed and was silent for a minute. “You're right.”

Eli paused, sucking in a deep breath. “What did you say?”

“I said you're right,” Alex repeated. “Lisa and I had a very disturbing relationship. And I didn't act the way I should've at every turn. I should've defended you but I didn't. And I let that go on for four years. But I can't see you and him together for four years, Eli, I can't,” he told her.

“This isn't about me and James, is it?” she asked.

“No,” Alex said, taking a step closer to her. “It's about me and you.”

Eli sighed, running a hand over her hair. “I'm sick of arguing with you. It's not fun and it's not healthy. And it's not what we do.”

“You're right.”

“Still not used to hearing you say that,” Eli joked, smiling softly.

Alex laughed, taking another step towards her until they were standing toe to toe. “He's not good enough for you.”

She rolled her eyes. “Then who is?”

Alex smiled slowly before he pressed his lips against hers lightly. It wasn't an admission, no, no, he wasn't ready for that yet; besides, Eli would require words more than actions. It was simply what he wanted to do every day when he woke up. It was then that he decided there was no way he would be able to survive if he didn't kiss her for four more years.

He was surprised when she didn't pull away; maybe a part of him thought that she would. Maybe add in a slap for theatrics, he wasn't sure. He took it a step further, grabbing her hips and pulling her closer. No, there was no way he would be able to wait four more years. And maybe right then was as good of a time as any to tell her.

Eli pulled away slowly, clearing her throat. “I, um. I don't think—“

Alex rested his forehead against hers. “Just. Don't say anything just yet.”

Eli snapped her mouth shut. She thought that was a better option than stumbling over her words and embarrassing herself even further. She wasn't that girl; she wasn't the girl who cheated on her boyfriend. And yet, she just had. She had completely forgotten about James the second Alex's lips touched her own. And what scared her more was, she didn't care. Because nothing else mattered whenever Alex was around. And, okay, that scared her, too.

“I have to tell you something,” Alex said softly, fearful that if he rose his voice, the moment would be broken. And he wasn't quite ready for that.

“Hmm?”

“I—“ He bit back a curse when his cell phone started to ring.

The moment was broken.

Eli took a step back, pushing a strand of hair behind her ear.

Alex looked down at his phone to see Jack's name. He hit ignore and sighed.

Maybe it just wasn't the right time.