I Need You But You Make My Heart Burn in Pieces

I woke up being frantically shaken, by a scared looking woman, it was Sara, in front of me.
"Sara, I have a headache, could you please stop doing that?" I mumbled.

"Oh my God! You're alive," she exclaimed, hugging me tight.

Not being in the best of moods, I didn't return the hug, suddenly I felt something hot and bitter rise up my throat, I pulled out of her grasp and stumbled into a cubicle, managing to throw up neatly in the toilet. I groaned and felt like crying.
Wiping my mouth with my sleeve, I bit my lip and tried not to cry, when I remembered where I was and then the tears started, I slipped down the wall and squeezed my eyes shut, trying to make as little noise as possible.

"C-can we go home, now?" I asked Sara, my voice cracking, I tried not to let her see I was crying.

"Frankie, of course, as long as you tell me what happened…if you remember. You do remember, right?" she asked a look of fear held in her face.

"Yeah, I remember," I said, standing up and hobbling out the door, with Sara in the lead.

On the way home I fell asleep but was woken up suddenly by someone slapping me in the face. Immediately I was terrified, I thought it was Gerard; I yelped and covered my face with my arm, squeezing my eyes tight in fear.

"Frank! What are you doing?" I heard Sara shrieking at me. I relaxed quickly, letting out a relived sigh.

"N-nothing, I'm fine. Why did you slap me?" I asked.

"You weren't waking up and I thought you'd died or something," she told me, blushing slightly.

"Idiot," I mumbled and sighed, shaking my throbbing head as I got out of the car; we were back at her house.

Her friend opened the door before we even got the door and rushed down the drive, "Sara! You're back soon," she exclaimed, glancing at me, "Is he okay?"

"He's okay, sort of," Sara said, "You can go now if you want, here," she handed her friend some money, "Thanks for looking after Frankie, she was okay for you and everything, wasn't she?"

"Oh, of course, she's a good little girl," her friend smiled, I rolled my eyes, woman can chat for ages, especially woman with babies. So I made my way into the house, dropping to the sofa and curling up, my eyes eyelids drooping shut.

I drifted off for a few minutes before Sara ran back into the house and began shaking me awake.

I moaned and grumbled, "What are you doing, woman?"

"Waking you up, you need to tell what happened," Sara's voice was high pitched, her face going a pink color, I stifled a giggle; she was getting extremely stressed.

Sara stood up, hands on hips and glared down at me, "Oh, yes, Frank, just laugh because you're supposed to in these situations," she exclaimed sarcastically, "for Christ sakes you just got beaten up by your boyfriend, this is serious!"

Suddenly, I began to realize what had happened; Gerard really had threatened me, it wasn't just a dream and he really had beaten me up. I hung my head, feeling almost ashamed for being such a weak, crappy person.

Sara sighed, her anger vanishing as she sat down beside me, pulling me into her arms. I collapsed on her and just let the tears slide down my face, wishing I didn't exist.

I woke from a pleasant sleep at around ten in the morning, it was a respectful time to wake up but it didn't feel like it. My head throbbed and my stomach hurt. I couldn't remember what had woken me up but suddenly my ring tone went again; that was what had woken me up.

I scrambled for my phone and picked it up, I pressed the green button.

"Hello," my voice came out all croaky.

"Frank! Where are you, man? I haven't heard from you all week," Mikey's frantic voice crackled through. It took my tired brain a while to process his words. I realized, of course he hadn't seen me all week, I'd been at Sara's, he must be worried, I thought. A pang of guilt rushed to my head, I hadn't bothered to call anyone; I was so inconsiderate.

"Frank, are you going to answer me, I'm worried about you, why aren't you here?" Mikey asked.

"Why aren't I where?" I asked.

"At the apartment with Gerard, I just found him all doped up, out cold on the floor," he explained.

My eyes widened, my head cleared immediately and the pain in my stomach disappeared, "G-Gerard?" my voice came out a small squeak.

"Yes! Jeez, Frank, what did you do to him?" Mikey sounded scared.

My voice caught in my throat, "I-I don't know," was all I managed to say, "Listen, I'll be right over," I said hanging up the phone.

Fear welled up in my throat, I was worried Gerard would hate me, last time I saw him he had knocked me unconscious and partly I hated him for that but mostly I was scared but I still had to see if he was alright. Gerard had done drugs again and now he was out cold, as Mikey had said.

I rushed into the kitchen to tell Sara I was going but she wasn't there, and nor was little Frankie, Sara had left a note on the side explaining she was at work and Frankie was at day care. I nodded to myself, turned the piece of paper over and scribbled down a brief summary of why I was gone and thanked her for everything, I didn’t remember if I had given her my number so I scribbled that down too. I shoved on my converse with out tying them up properly, rushing out the door and locking it with the spare key before hiding it under the flowerpot again.

In my haste, I jogged all the way to Gerard and mine's apartment, by the time I got there I was sweaty and out of breath but I had just enough energy to get up the stairs, down the corridor and into the apartment.

I stood, leaning on my knees for just a minute gaining back my breath. When I was less tired out I looked up to see Mikey kneeling over his brother, gently shaking him.