The Dorkiest Vampire

My mother went overboard as soon as she found out about my first school dance. The only thing I hate more than wearing a dress is shopping for one and, even though I waited until the last minute, my mother insisted on taking me shopping Thursday night for something to wear. I ended up getting home late, feeling terrifically tired, and with a dress I wasn’t exactly partial to but had agreed to wear just so my mother would take me home. The shopping experience was made even worse by all of the incessant questions my mother was asking about my date. It was hard for her to believe I didn’t know anything about him but that he was a sophomore, a football player, and we had once had a short, boring conversation about chip dip.

True to Mick’s prediction, Christophe had found a charming date in the form of one of the sophomore girls who felt his charm and overall good looks were swoon-worthy. Neither of the Beliveau men seemed to have an issue getting dates. While all of the girls at school giggled at Christophe’s stupid jokes and winning charm, all of the older women in town would melt into puddles at the mere mention of Antoine’s brooding countenance or “chiseled bod,” as one of my mother’s cougar-wannabe friends put it. Personally, I found Antoine’s dark demeanor frightening and though Christophe was funny, he was very brotherly toward me. However, the boys seemed to be doing all right for themselves and I couldn’t count the number of girls disappointed that Christophe didn’t pick them up for the dance.

However, the Beliveau sister was not in such good shape. Galiene was fretting endlessly on everything from what color eye shadow she should use to what topics of conversation might put Mick most at ease to what she should do to stop him from leaving early. I wasn’t much of a help to Galiene other than just sitting there and listening to her tirades over the phone every night. When the day of the dance arrived, Galiene was a completely nervous wreck over everything and Mick didn’t seem to be feeling much better. Of course, his concerns were less about fashion and conversation and more about fearing Galiene was going to secretly take him out back and eat him alive between sips of punch. Again, I was starting to wonder if extreme paranoia was just another lovely side effect of vampirism.

Though I had told my parents the day before, I had postponed letting Ritchie know I was anyway inclined to go to the dance as long as possible. In fact, he wasn’t aware that I had even been asked until the doorbell rang and he peered out of his bedroom window to see Eldon standing there. Ritchie answered the door before I could make it down there and started firing away questions about why Eldon was dressed up and at our doorstep. I cursed inwardly as I made my way down the stairs to intercept. I had been hoping Ritchie would leave early to pick up Sue Beth and that he wouldn’t find out I had been asked until a few hours into the dance itself.

“What do you mean you’re here to pick up my sister!” Ritchie raged. He was staring down Eldon quite fiercely, making Eldon look as if he was wishing the floor would just open up and swallow him whole. “Didn’t you even think to runt his by me first? Huh?”

“I’m…s-sorry…I d-didn’t…” Eldon began, obviously terrified his much bigger, more menacing teammate was going to pound him to a pulp and bury him in the backyard. I sighed, knowing I had to intervene. Though my brother was rather happy-go-lucky, he could easily slip into intimidating football player mode, like he was doing with Eldon.

“Leave him alone, Ritch,” I rolled my eyes. “If you spend any more time threatening him you’re going to be late for Sue Beth. And you can’t really afford to be late after what you did…”

“What did I do?” Ritchie panicked. I snickered inwardly, knowing he had bought the lie. Ritchie was so afraid of offending Sue Beth, he became petrified at the mere thought she might be upset with him.

“Wow, she didn’t even tell you?” I said with a low whistle. “Must be pretty bad if she’s not even talking to you…”

“She’s talking to me!” Ritchie insisted.

“Really? When was the last time you guys talked?” I asked. Ritchie frowned.

“Yesterday at school, but she was busy getting ready for today…” he began.

“So you didn’t even bother to call her last night?” I said pointedly. Ritchie let out a frustrated growl and then stomped off to prepare himself the rest of the way for the dance and make additional preparations to smooth over the imaginary rift between himself and Sue-Beth. I turned to Eldon with a sigh. “Sorry about him. Luckily, he gets easily distracted.”

“Are you ready to go then?” Eldon asked. I wanted to say yes, but my parents and grandparents came down the stairs to see us off.

After ten minutes of my mother and grandmother insisting on getting pictures and my father and grandfather questioning Eldon on everything from his college plans to his medical records, we finally escaped my house. However, we were caught up in another whirlwind at the Vespasien residence. Mick’s mother and Mrs. Beliveau were all bleary eyed at the thought of their two babies going to a dance together. Christophe was flirting with his date in the living room, though she seemed more interested in the brooding figure of Antoine reading a murder mystery in a dark corner of the room. MIck looked like he was going to throw up while Galiene threw a hissy fit every time her mother tried to adjust her dress to make it less revealing. Mr. Vespasien was taking in the entire scene and hiding in the background, though I see the faintest outline of a bemused smile across his face. Once another round of pictures were taken, the six of us finally got into the Vespasien’s SUV, which they had loaned to Christophe to drive for the night.

Christophe and his date kept to themselves, chatting together in the front, and I found myself in the awkward position of being torn between my date and make sure Galiene and Mick’s went smoothly. Eldon tried to engage me in conversation during the whole ride, but I found myself too busy trying to make Mick more open to Galiene’s conversation and steering Galiene away from topics that would make Mick retreat into himself. I couldn’t help but feel ashamed when we finally arrived at school since Eldon definitely seemed to think I cared more about developing a relationship between Galiene and Mick than developing one between the two of us.

I suddenly wished I had listened to Mick and skipped the dance altogether when we finally arrived at school. The gym looked like a tornado had come through and dropped a crap-ton of glitter and streamers in its wake. It seemed as though the decorating committee had either been under the influence of something or had thrown everything together an hour before the dance was set to begin. Half an hour in, the punch was hot, the cookies were stale, and the DJ the school hired still hadn’t shown up, leaving the school’s ancient AP Calculus teacher in charge of the music. Within forty-five minutes, Ritchie came over to bust Eldon’s chops and then tell me he and Sue Beth were going back to our house to watch movies rather than the lame dance.

By that point, Christophe had mysteriously disappeared with his date into the dark corners of the gym. Despite her attempts, Galiene hadn’t been able to get Mick out for a dance but the two of them seemed to be having a decent time chatting together on the bleachers. Some how, Mick had managed to smuggle his Magic: The Gathering cards into his suite pocket and the two of them were playing it. I smiled smugly, thinking of how well the two of them actually fit together. Eldon and I made attempts to dance, but it was sort of hard since the teacher doing the music couldn’t operate the turntable very well. I was pretty nervous when the first slow song came on, even if it was after Ritchie had left.

“So… you and Vespasien hang out a lot,” Eldon mentioned.

“Yeah,” I nodded. “He’s a pretty nice guy. I think he gets a bad rap because he’s not always in the best of health…”

“He is kind of… different…” Eldon shrugged. “I guess that’s because he’s from New Orleans. His family is pretty… different…”

“Don’t tell him I told you, but when his parents were first married, they had a daughter and she died when she was a teenager. They never thought they’d have kids again and then MIck came out of the blue a couple years after his sister died,” I said quietly. “I think they come off as weird because they’re just over protective of him.”

“I get that,” Eldon admitted. “I know my parents would go crazy if something happened to one of their kids. And loosing one who’s practically grown up… no wonder he’s sheltered…”

“He’s really great, but no one gives him a chance,” I said.

“So… why is he here with Galiene?” Eldon asked.

“Galiene has a huge crush on him but he’s kind of annoyed by her,” I replied. “I think Galiene’s doing pretty well tonight considering she usually starts beating him up whenever she runs out of intelligent stuff to talk about…”

“You don’t… like him, do you?” Eldon asked worriedly.

“He’s a good friend,” I said defensively.

“I mean… you don’t like him like Galiene likes him…” Eldon said.

“No,” I said, feeling slightly gross at the thought. “Why would you think that?”

“I dunno… I mean, there’s the whole rule about not going after someone your friend has a crush on and the two of you seemed to do everything together before Galiene came…” Eldon shrugged. “I guess people just assumed…”

“That a guy and a girl can’t just be friends?” I snorted.

“I guess,” Eldon said, looking embarrassed. “I mean, you don’t see it a lot. Besides, I always kind of thought he was… you know… sweet on you or something…”

“We’re just friends,” I insisted. “And there is definitely a spark there between him and Galiene, even if he doesn’t see it yet. I think she’s had a crush on them since they were kids…”

“Sure has a funny way of showing it,” Eldon grimaced. “She’s in my biology class, you know? Just about half the male population of this school is afraid she’s going to beat them up…”

“And the other half?” I asked curiously.

“They either think she’s a freak or… uh… you know…” Eldon admitted embarrassedly. “Good in the sack…”

“I doubt any of them would know,” I snorted. “Especially since Galiene has two large and very over-protective brothers milling about.”

“Yeah, one scary older brother is enough,” Eldon muttered. I smirked, glad that Ritchie hadn’t stuck around to intimidate him some more.

About two hours in to the dance, I finally suggested a break to Eldon who agreed and went to get us something from the soda machines rather than the nasty punch the school had provided. Just as soon as Eldon relinquished me, Galiene rushed up and dragged me into the bathroom for some “girl talk.” I caught a glimpse of Mick, who had retreated into the shadows of the room to sit and remain as inconspicuous as possible once Galiene had relinquished him from dancing duty. Christophe had disappeared off with his date and I didn’t have the heart to think about the fifty-five-year-old-vampire who was most likely feeling up his sixteen-year-old date.

“What’s going on?” I asked Galiene once she had checked to make sure no one else was in the bathroom with us. I had a feeling from her nervous behavior that not all was going well with her and Mick’s date.

“It’s just… well, I can’t help but get the feeling that Mick doesn’t want to be here,” Galiene sighed.

“Yeah, he kind of hates being out in public, let alone at school dance,” I shrugged.

“But I feel like he doesn’t want to be with me,” Galiene pouted.

“Well, have you been nice to him?” I asked her curiously.

“I’ve tried,” Galiene sighed, “but I’m like the last person in the world he wants to be with…”

“Just continue to be sweet and charming,” I shrugged. “Maybe going outside for some fresh air might help Mick out. I know being cooped up with our classmates is probably getting to him…”

“You’re not suggesting that I… take him outside on a pretense so we can hook up, are you?” Galiene asked, her eyes widening.

“Do I look like a dumb, horny guy?” I snorted. “No. Just talk or something. Maybe on something he’s interested in, you know. Ask him questions. Don’t do all the talking yourself. Force the conversation to flow from him…”

“I wish it were that easy,” Galiene sighed. “I wish there was a way to just make him like me…”

“Amen,” I snorted.

Galiene and I shortly returned to the dance and she promptly took my advice. After zeroing in on Mick hiding out in a corner of the room, she went over to him. Following a few moments of conversation, I watched as the pair slipped out onto the quad for some fresh air and hopefully so Mick could open up to Galiene a little. I knew Mick had every reason to drag his feet considering his past with Galiene, but a part of me wished he could just buck up and get over it so I wouldn’t continue to be torn between the two of them. I made my way back over to Eldon, who seemed to be a little miffed that I had abandoned him in favor of Galiene and the ladies room.

“What’s going on?” Eldon asked curiously.

“Galiene thinks the night is a disaster,” I shrugged. “She’s really… forward and outspoken and Mick is…”

“Not,” Eldon finished with a knowing nod. “Honestly, they seem like polar opposites… but I mean, if opposites attract and all that…”

“Actually… Galiene and Mick have a lot more in common than you might think,” I said. “I don’t know if they realize it, but it’s true.” Eldon nodded and I was glad he decided not to pursue my statement further. In fact, I was just glad in general that Eldon swiftly moved the topic of conversation from Mick and Galiene to myself.

For the next few songs, Eldon and I swayed back and forth to the music while he asked me questions about my favorite food, what type of music and movies I was into and just random questions in general. I found out that Eldon was very sweet, nice and above all extremely respectful. Being born and raised in Louisiana, I had always been brought up to fall for a southern gentleman and Eldon was a spectacular example of that stereotype. Of course, I knew even if Eldon had the manners of a gentleman from a century or so ago, he was still a modern enough guy he probably wouldn’t hesitate if I offered myself up to him. Not that anything of that nature was going to happen any time in the future. Still, I didn’t have a hard time envisioning Eldon taking me out a second time or maybe carrying by books to and from classes for me.

I was so absorbed in my own little fantasy date with Eldon that I completely forgot about Galiene and Mick, who I assumed were still outside chatting nearly an hour later. It barely eleven o’clock and even though there was an hour still left in the dance, a lot of the couples seemed to be ditching. It was about this time that Christophe brought his date over, suggesting we all head back to the Vespasiens to catch a movie or something. When Christophe asked me where his sister and Mick had gotten off to, I was stunned to realize I had absolutely no idea. Though Christophe acted as though he was glad his baby sister might be getting some action, there was still a glint of fear in his eyes that maybe something had happened to her.

When the four of us headed outside to the quad, we found Mick and Galiene sitting at the pavilion where students sometimes took lunch on sunny days. They were deep in conversation about something and wouldn’t have noticed our approach had Eldon not accidentally stubbed his toe against a giant rock in the grass. An ordinary person wouldn’t have heard, but Mick and Galiene’s super vampire hearing picked up on the slight thunk as well as the curse words Eldon was muttering to himself. They both looked up at us and instantly blushed, as if we had caught them doing something inappropriate.

“You guys wanna blow this popsicle stand?” Christophe grinned. Galiene rolled her eyes as Mick nodded fervently. “Movies?” Christophe added.

“Sure,” Mick agreed.

“Nothing Eighties,” Galiene stipulated. “You’ve apparently had too much of that lately.”

“Sure thing,” Christophe grinned. He pulled the car keys from his pocket, began twirling them around his fingers, and led his date over to where the car was waiting in the parking lot. Somehow, Eldon fell in step with a less than chatty Mick while I found myself trudging next to Galiene.

“Did it go well?” I whispered to her.

“Yeah,” Galiene beamed.

We didn’t say anything else as we entered into the car and I found myself chatting amicably with Eldon the rest of the ride home. Though Galiene seemed satisfied, I wasn’t sure how much progress she had made on the Mick front. The two of them were certainly chatty earlier in the evening, but they seemed to be relatively quiet during the ride home. Of course, Galiene made much more progress than I had anticipated since as we got out of the car and walked into the Vespasien’s house, I noticed Mick discreetly slip his hand into hers.