I Can't Help You Fix Yourself But At Least I Can Say I Tried

"This place is definitly a strip club," Zacky stated.

All five of us had our faces plastered against the window of the bus as we circled around the club to park at the back.

"Forgive us, but we don't really want to go into a strip club," Val said seriously.

I turned my head to catch Matt give her a sympathetic look.

"What?" she asked him. "It's nothing that we haven't seen before."

I laughed and stood up. "Come on Val," I pulled my fingerless skull gloves from my pocket and pulled them on. "It's nothing we haven't seen before either, but we still wanna see it."

It was true. Hell, we were well known for the being the guys who followed the Motley Crue biography to a T and were easily able to rival them in certain parts.

Music. Chicks. Booze.

It's what we lived our lives for. And, it was a damn good life. We've seen every strip club imaginable, been in the company of everyone imaginable, and had times that people could only dream of. We are the luckiest guys on earth. We're living our dream. And there is nothing, absolutely nothing I would rather be doing right now...other than the little blond chick who just walked by the bus and flashed her chest.

Rev glanced back at me. "I think it's a strip club," he grinned.

Val gave in. "Fine just give us a minute to get ready."

I waited until I couldn't wait anymore. "I'm going in," I placed my Fedora on my head hoping it would kind of shield my face from some people.

"I thought we were going to wait," Zacky protested as Johnny, Matt, and Rev got up to join me.

"We're going in!" I yelled loud enough for the girls at the back of the bus to hear us.

"Whatever!"

I was sure it was Leana who yelled back at me but I didn't really care, I was already half way down the steps of the bus.

All five of us stood there staring up at the large glowing sign above the entrance to the club, the obviously naked outline of a girl had her head tipped back and it looked as if it was raining on her.

"That's hot all on it's own," Johnny was grinning.

"Well what are we waiting for?" I tucked my hands into the front pocket of my jeans, the guys slowly following behind me as we skipped the line, walking towards the bouncer.

"Where do you think you're going?" A huge guy easily taller than Rev and a good two hundred pounds on Matt held his hand out in front of me.

"Oh my god it's Avenged Sevenfold!" someone in the line screeched, I turned my head to see who it was but soon everyone was staring back pointing.

"Synyster, can I have an autograph?"

It only took a moment and soon the crowd was yelling all of our names and I glanced at the bouncer sympathetically. The guy must have known our band because he let us in for free, I was even ready to pay for everyone. It wasn't until we were inside that I realized that without us, the girls were going to have to wait in line and pay.

"Want me to go back out for them?" Zacky offered when I made note of it, but Matt had beat him to it. He was on the phone with who I presumed was Val. Not that it mattered, once we got further into the club we realized right away, that it wasn't a strip club. But the waitresses in their little white bikini's were enough to intruige me.

"Can I help you boys?"

"Do you have a VIP area?" Rev asked.

She looked us over then nodded. "Yeah, you guys in a band?"

"You could say that," Zacky smiled.

We followed the waitress into a nice roped off area complete with comfy leather couches, a glass table in the middle, our own guards watching over us and our own waitress.

A couple bottles of beer later we were all out on the dance floor dancing with random girls. Matt had spoken to Val again and the girls had decided on the bar down the street. We'd agreed to meet up later.

A pair of soft lips found my neck and I smiled as I slid my hands around to her lower back and eventually down to her ass. I'd tracked down the little blond that'd flashed the bus earlier and she was now grinding against me, nibbling on my neck. My goal for the night was to get this little firecracker into bed and I was well on my way.

"Hey, we're going to sit down!" Rev tried to yell at me over the music, I couldn't really hear him but I understood him motioning back towards our VIP booth.

The lights surrounding the DJ who had been set up far away from the dance floor began to flash erratically and the crowd started screaming. Before I knew it, the water sprayers above us turned on. The only thing I could think of was my blackberry.

Letting go of the blonde, who's name I had yet to get, I got out of the water's line of spray as quickly as possible. She stared at me stunned and I motioned for her to come with me, but she simply gave me the finger which caused me to laugh. She was going to try to play hard to get, but in the end, she'd come back to me.

I checked out my blackberry and began heading back to our booth. What caught my attention was a group of people near what I assumed was one of the back doors to the club. Interested in the possibility of seeing a fight I ordered a beer at the bar then slowly wandered over.

***

My whole body was damp yet I was so cold and everything ached. I was exhausted yet there was no way in hell I could slow my heart down. It had a mind of it's own and it was hell bent on breaking through my rib cage and out of my chest.

I turned my head slightly, my vision was blurry yet I was able to determine by coming face to face with shoes, that I was indeed on the floor. I needed to get up, I didn't want to ruin this party. All I needed was another pick me up. Danielle would go purchase one for me, hopefully she was back from her little outting with a regular trick.

"Fuck, Myranda what are you doing?"

Even the voice was distorted but I knew deep down it belonged to Dani and I was thankful.

I felt myself being lifted off the floor, and the simple motion of being lifted upward made me queasy. Then suddenly, everything went black.

***

When I woke up the room was unbearably white and sterile smelling which meant I could only be in one place, the hospital.

Well I wouldn't be for long.

I tried to sit up but my body didn't wanna cooperate. I didn't wanna be here, especially if the cops were going to be involved. I pulled the IV rather roughly from my arm causing a trickle of blood to seep down my pale skin. Most people would have cringed, but I'm not one to really acknowledge pain.

"Ma'am, you can't go anywhere please lay back down."

I don't know where the nurse came from but she was right there none the less insisting I lay back down.

"I need to go home," I stated firmly, pushing through the pain and sitting up, Fuck, they'd put me into one of those stupid hospital gowns. "Where are my clothes?"

"You nearly died of heatstroke, you need rest and a ton of liquids my dear," she bustled around me, picking up the IV. "I understand it's hard, but you've wasted away. You weigh a hundred pounds," she looked directly at me, her eyes full of life. "I'll find you help if you need it."

We both knew what she was talking about and instead of appreciating her enthousiasm, it pissed me off. "The only help I need is getting out of this hospital bed,"

"We both know that you're an addict my dear."

"Would you stop calling me that," I snapped. "I have a name," she was pushing all my buttons.

"Myranda, you need help," she reminded me sweetly.

"Doesn't everyone," I muttered, pushing myself into a sitting position with my hands, if she wasn't going to help me, I was going to do it myself.

"Lay back down."

I recognized that stern voice and peered around the nurse to see Danielle standing there with a coffee in one hand and a cigarette in the other. Her jet black hair was tied back into a high pony tail and she looked worn out, and pissed off. She was still wearing her black bikini underneath her mesh dress. Most people would ask her to leave, but her 5'10" one hundred and forty pound appearance coupled with bigger muslces, tattoos and piercings usually intimidated. But the nurse didn't seem phased.

"Ma'am, can you please put that out, I don't want to have to call security."

Dani looked like she was going to argue but eventually put it out and the nurse left the room. But I knew she'd be back.

"You're still alive I see," Dani stared at me as she took a seat in one of the chairs. "Thought you were going to get away with it this time?"

I nodded and slowly laid back down. "Nothing wrong with dieing doing what you love."

She clicked her tongue ring against her teeth. "You need to smarten up girl, you're lucky my John brought me back to the club when he did, and that boy cared enough to find out if anyone knew you."

I groaned as she helped me roll over to face her."What guy?" I asked curiously.

She pointed towards the door. "The one in the waiting room. He found you last night and wanted to make sure that you're alright."

"Jesus, he's here?"

She nodded and pulled up the closest wooden chair so she could sit down. I closed my eyes to the light and tried to think back but I couldn't concentrate.

"Well, tell him I said thanks,"

"You can," Dani replied as she pulled another cigarette from her purse. "I'll send him in, I'm going out for a smoke." I watched her stand up again and leave the room. I knew she was still buzzing off of something because the girl couldn't sit still.

"Dani please don't," I called after her but it was pretty much useless. Ever tried telling a someone who's drunk that they're drunk? Same concept.

***

I was sitting in the waiting room of the hospital tapping my foot to an imaginary beat when the girl who told me to call her Dani approached me. I wasn't going to lie, she looked like she was ready to beat the shit out of someone. And I highly doubted that she'd lose. The only thing she had going for her was that she wasn't entirely unattractive.

"You should go see her now while she's awake."

I nodded. Dani simply walked away from me down the hall in the opposite direction from which she came.

I picked my fedora up off my lap and ran my fingers through my hair before placing it on my head. I guess there was no time like the present. Bracing my hands on the arms of the chair I pushed myself into a standing position. The elderly couple a few chairs down from me began whispering to each other and I attempted a smile before heading down the hall towards her room.

A nurse was leaving as I entered and I removed my sunglasses, folding them arms over and grasping them in my hand as I neared the bed. She looked so iny and frail against the crisp white sheets. Dani told me she was twenty two but she definitly didn't look it. How in the hell had she got caught up in all of this?

"I guess thanks are in order," she whispered as she tried to sit up. I could see the pain she was in. And her voice was so soft and girlie. She sounded nothing like she looked.

"You don't have to sit up," I approached her, sitting in the chair beside her bed. "How are you feeling?"

"Like I fucked all night and overdosed on something funky," she tried to laugh and lighten the mood. "But I highly doubt you'd know what that feels like," she managed to prop herself up and look me over. "Well, at least about the overdosing part."

Ahhh, she did have a sense of humor. I smiled and leaned back in the chair. She seemed like a fiesty one. A quality I dug. "What's your name?"

She looked directly at me. Her eyes were a very pale blue, almost grey. I assumned they'd be very pretty if she wasn't in the state that she was.

"Myranda," she reached out her bony hand and I grasped it gently. "Myranda Sinclair."