The Roots That Tied to My Feet

“Melanie Hendricks?”

Melanie stood from her seat on the cement bench where she and John were residing as she looked to where her name was being called. There was an officer standing in his tight blue suit next to a boy covered in medical scrubs. He had blood on the front of the light green material and a disappointed look in his eyes.

“Your bail was paid,” the officer replied, gesturing to Ben.

Melanie turned around and looked at John worriedly, neither one of them necessarily surprised that Ben was only here to get her. She understood why completely. No person in a relationship would enjoy their significant other doing things such as this with another member of the opposite sex.

Melanie listened as John mumbled harsh words under his lips. “John, seriously consider yourself lucky,” Melanie said quietly before letting her eyes drift back to Ben. “I can guarantee you don’t want to be on this car ride home.”

She stepped out of the cell and into the open where the cop had left the couple. She looked nervously at Ben as he opened his mouth to speak. “Kennedy is on his way for John.”

Melanie nodded her head before stealing one last glance at the boy behind her and following her fiancée silently to his car. They got in the rented car quietly and Ben sat motionlessly. He finally looked over at Melanie and she couldn’t read what was exactly on his face. “What the hell, Melanie?”

She bit her lip nervously; she had tried planning this conversation many times in her mind but she had never once come to a conclusion of a proper answer. “Everyone makes mistakes, Ben.”

He looked at her incredulously, “Not you, Melanie. You would never do something like this.”

She would though, Melanie thought in her mind. This was the kid she had been her entire life—following along with John’s plans not caring about the outcome. “I’m sorry, Ben. I shouldn’t have called you… you were at work.”

“Shouldn’t have called me?” Ben repeated unbelieving. “Melanie! Of course you should have called me I’m you’re fiancée. You better get used to that now or else I don’t how much longer this is going to last.”

Melanie looked at Ben worriedly. “What are you talking about Ben?”

“What happened before you left, Melanie? You can’t just tell me that you and John were friends; I just do not buy it anymore. I need to know, this is important.”

Melanie stared at the boy who was looking at her intensely, pondering for the words to say to him. She couldn’t tell him nothing—he wasn’t stupid and she honestly didn’t know why she thought he was in the first place. She opened her mouth to speak at last, but no words made their way out. “John and I had a relationship. Is that what you wanted to hear, Ben?” She said at last.

She watched as his eyes set in with realization that all his guesses were right. He opened his mouth to reply but she cut him off. She continued, “It was short lived and yeah, it meant something to me at one time but I’m marrying you, Ben. I left and I didn’t come back for a reason and I chose you.”

Ben closed his eyes and guilt washed over his face. “I’m sorry, Melanie. I shouldn’t have even brought this up. Of course, you love me. I don’t know why I’m having doubts. I’m sorry. Please forgive me?”

Melanie looked into his blue eyes feeling a heavy weight settle on her chest. She tried to wipe away the thoughts of John’s breath hot on her lips and the heat of skin pressing against hers that had given her butterflies. “I forgive you.”
_____

Melanie walked up the stairs quickly, taking them two at a time. She needed to speak to him now—and right now only. She saw him sitting on the patio of his apartment that was between his door and his neighbors, his feet dangling beneath the railing.

Melanie coughed as smoke from his cigarette filled her lungs. She grabbed it from in between his fingers and threw it on the ground beneath their feet.

“What the hell, Melanie?” John asked irritated. His plaid shirt was missing its sleeves and she could see his new tattoo on his arm.

“Smoking is disgusting. We need to talk,” she said, grabbing the collar of his shirt and pulling him inside of his apartment.

He stumbled in behind her confusedly, shutting the apartment door behind them, “What about?”

She looked at the boy incredulously and she could see that in his green eyes he was still holding emotion from the other night at the pool. She sighed not being able to stay mad at him, “I’m sorry about freaking out on you about getting arrested.”

John rubbed his eyes and leaned against his door, “You haven’t been taking my calls. I just wanted to apologize. I didn’t think we’d get caught.”

Melanie chuckled, “You used to say that every time you got caught doing something stupid.”

He rubbed his head pensively, “I get caught a lot don’t I?”

She laughed, “Your plans never really work.”

“I’m just a bad boy,” John laughed, winking at her.

Melanie rolled her eyes, “Oh yeah John, you’re such a rebel. I can guarantee your mommy decorated this apartment and you talk to her on the phone every other night even though she lives literally ten minutes away.”

She watched as his eyes traveled along her body, checking her out completely. “You like it.”

She bit her lip, “John, let’s not have this conversation…” she warned.

He slowly started walking towards her, a smirk on his lips. “What conversation, Melanie?”

She looked at him uneasily as he approached her, lessening the distance between them. His hands found their way to her hips instinctively as his forehead rested against hers once again. “John,” she whispered.

He had a shy smile on his lips, “Yeah, babe?”

She put her hands on his chest, “Get away from me, please.”

John’s eyes closed suddenly and she felt his body become rigid. “Melanie, no…this-this no,” he mumbled all at once and she felt her heart pang with depression. “You and I are meant… Melanie…”

She let one tear fall down her cheek as she listened to the sadness in John’s voice. “I’m getting married, John. Things are different now. You and I…we’re different.”

He grabbed her wrist tightly, “No Melanie. The other night you wanted this.”

Melanie pulled herself away from him, “The other night was a mistake John. This isn’t happening okay? We’re friends. I told you I wanted my friend back, not us. There is no us.”

“Melanie,” John said sadly, tears threatening his eyes. “I don’t know how to be your friend.”

She looked at him sympathetically, “Well you learn something new every day…right?”

John looked at her with a loss of words. His lips were trembling and he began to fumble in his pocket for a cigarette and once he found one she ripped it from his hands.

“My mom is dying of cancer, John,” she seethed throwing it to the floor.

“Breast cancer,” he replied condescendingly.

“I can’t lose you too,” she said softly barely above a whisper.

John stared at her falling into her blue eyes. “What are you doing here?” He asked.

Melanie looked at him unsure, biting her lip gently. “I needed to talk to you about something.”

He sat on his couch standoffishly, obviously angry at her for denying him. “Shoot.”

“I-uh, I told Ben that we had a relationship in high school,” she warned him.

John looked at her confusedly, “And?”

“I just told him we were together for a little while…no details, and-uh-

“You don’t want me to tell him that we had sex,” John finished for her, his anger burning in his eyes. “You’re living a lie, you know that?”

“And you aren’t?” She asked, her eyes narrowed.

“Am I the one who has a fiancée that know nothing about me? The one who told the ‘man of my dreams’ that I was a virgin? Am I the one who pretends that I’m this perfect person when deep down I am shattered to pieces?I bet he doesn’t even know why you’re broken. I bet he doesn’t even know you were raped.”

“Oh yeah John? How about you! You pretend to be this cocky arrogant man that you’re not. You feel subconscious obviously in some area of your being that you have to screw everything with a vagina just to make yourself feel more complete. You act like I was the one who started all of this and that ‘you’re just so heartbroken’. Well, John, let me ask you, how many girls did you have to sleep with to forget about me? I bet it was just one considering you never called either, you hypocrite. I am not the only one who moved on and don’t you dare say I am.”

“At least the girl’s I screw know I’m only in it for the night,” he retorted.

“Oh my God, how noble of you. What do you do? ‘Hey baby can I get inside of you so that I can temporarily make myself better’? How charming,” Melanie said rolling her eyes.

“It worked on you.”

Melanie stared at him unbelievingly looking at the monsters they had become in cause of one another’s action. She tried to hold back her tears but they poured out slowly.

John sighed and ran a hand through his hair guilt running through him as he watched the girl breaking in front of him because of his last words. “I won’t tell him.”

“Thank you, John,” Melanie said shamefully.

“Yep,” he replied. “Now, if you’ll excuse me. Lucy is on her way over.” He began backing her out the door. “Call me sometime next week and maybe we can have some lunch or something before Thanksgiving but for now, goodbye.”

Melanie stood with her mouth agape watching as his white door slammed in her face. Maybe being friends was harder than she thought.