Lack of Color.

Have you ever felt alone is a crowded room? Have you ever felt lost when you knew exactly where you were? Have you ever rambled on about completely nothing but still made sense to someone else? Irony; a statement that, when taken in context, may actually mean the opposite of what is written literally. I sat there silent, hands in my laps looking up at some man talk about someone he had no idea who she was. Didn’t know her secrets like I did, didn’t know the stupid shit she loved to do. Didn’t know how amazing that person was, that person that was lying cold in front of us like some display. I could hear the echo of sniffs and cries as the priest in front of us recited lines from a bible, something that Emily didn’t even believe in. I sat there not hearing a word he was saying, my hearing was shot. My sight was just as gone, the only thing I could see were blurs of shapes and colors splashed together like some painting in front me. After the ceremony, I stayed still not being able to move a muscle. I sat there for about an hour after the ceremony, not letting a single tear fall from my face.
“Erin sweetheart, it’s time to go.”

What happens when the person you should be trying to save, is yourself?