Lack of Color.

John.

I sat there singing along to Tom Petty playing on our bus, as happy as can be. I looked over at Jared who was singing along with me, beer in hand. Tour had gotten back to how it used to be, I was finally going back to the old John. Everyone around us even noticed at how happy I’ve been. I looked down at my phone, another text from Erin. Erin was like my guardian angel, made me back to who I use to be. I was in love with her and I wanted to tell her but I couldn’t. I couldn’t be the first one to say it; I could never deal with the rejection.

“Hey man.”

“Hey dude”, I said sitting out the curb phone in hand.

“How have you been feeling?”

I looked from my phone, another text from Erin. I just wanted to go home and see her beautiful face. I looked up at Kenny who was looking down at me with such care in his eyes. I gave him a smile and he seemed shocked by it.

“Really good man.”

“Does this have to do with a certain girl?” he asked with a smile on his face looking up to see Tim and Jared playing keep away from Pat. Then to Garrett standing there talking to Moose, probably about some comic books, like always.

“Yeah”, I said feeling like a faggot with a big smile on my face.

“Be careful man, this is a sticky situation you put yourself in.”

“I didn’t put myself into it, it kind of fell in place.”

“You know what I mean, not only is she Tim and Pat’s sister but she was Emily’s best friend.”

“Kenny, I know what I’ve gotten myself into trust me. I’ve tried my hardest to keep my distance but I can’t do that anymore. Dude I’m in love with the girl.”

He looked at me, eyes a bit wider than they were. Then he shook his head with a smile on his face looking out at Moose getting chased by Pat. I laughed at the sight before turning to look at Kenny with a smirk on my face.

“You can’t help who you fall in love with.”

“I know man; god has some fucked up sense of humor.”

I just laughed thinking to this situation I got myself in. I looked down at my phone, seeing the text from Erin, she just replied with a I wish you were here. I just smiled down at my phone and then looked up at Kenny who was just laughing. We walked out to do the acoustic show, all of us standing there as we played our songs. I loved seeing everyone singing along to every word I sang. This was the life I always wanted, the job of my dreams and I was here living it. After the show we all went out to take pictures and hang out with the fans. I always loved talking to my fans, they were all amazing. Well most.

“Hey man, get back on the bus.”

“Alright, one minute”, I said looking over at Moose and then posing for another picture.

I made my way through the crowd and into the bus, being greeted with a beer always made me happy. We all sat around as Tim Petty and the Heartbreakers played, all of us singing along.

“So when do we head to California to record?”

“Next week, you guys are staying home and then next week flying out to California for the remaining time”, Tim said looking through some papers.

I looked down at my phone, deciding whether or not I should call Erin. I got up from the couch and walked towards the back into my bunch. I scrolled down my numbers, the time was barely midnight she should be awake. I dialed the numbers, pushing down on the green button and placed the phone to my ear. I heard the phone ring over and over again until I got her voicemail.

“Hey Erin, I just wanted to call you and see how you’re doing. I’m guessing you’re busy, I’ll see you soon. Bye beautiful.”

I took the phone from my ear, lying back in the bunk humming along to the music that was playing loudly from the main room. I grabbed the camera that was on the side on my bed, I grabbed it in my hands turning it on. Going through the pictures that were on the camera, way too many pictures of my shoes in different locations. I laughed at how ridiculous these pictures were. Then I got to the pictures of Erin, flipping through them when a smile on my face. I looked at the two faces smiling back at me, she was beautiful. I grabbed my phone; trying to call again it went straight to voicemail. I stared down at it, not bothering to leave a voicemail. I placed the phone back on my chest, still looking through the pictures. Then I felt my phone vibrate, indicating I had a text. I opened it up seeing it was from Erin.

Sorry I’m at a party, I’ll call you tomorrow. Goodnight.