Disenchanted

Present

I was jarred awake, gasping for air and struggling to pull myself out of the awful nightmare I had just had. I heaved in a few breaths, steadying myself with a hand to my sweating forehead before I ventured to open my eyes and get out of bed. Just how dumb was that? A dragon? Me? It was impossible. And the prince would never be someone so cruel. The dream had seemed so real, though, and I almost laughed at the absurdity of it, shaking my head.
And then I opened my eyes.
Expecting to see my new room in the prince's mansion, I was taken aback to find myself in something completely opposite. The room was not mine in any sense of the word. It was rundown, light coming in from the open door to my left. Woefully made and old throw rugs covered the unpolished wooden floor here and there, damaged from the sun and use. There was a small, low table that sat in the middle of the room with no chairs around it, a few windows that let in way too much light, and the bed I was on wasn't a bed at all. It was just a bunch of furs laid down on the floor with blankets on top. Next to me, in a miniature, makeshift bed of her own was Marlen. She was small again and sleeping peacefully, her breathing even.
My heart pounding slightly, I looked down at myself and realized I was wearing a shirt that wasn't mine. Looking around, I saw my vest hanging and blowing in the breeze near the open door, the slightly heavy material shining in the sunlight. With an even more rapid heartbeat, I grabbed the shirt I was wearing and tugged the collar down, praying that I wouldn't see a gaping hole. I didn't, but the small, pink and rapidly healing scar in the shape of a star-burst did nothing but make me freak out.
With increasing clarity, flashes of the dream I was starting to realize wasn't a dream at all zipped through my head. I remembered Marlen life-sized, her voice lilting as she protected me from another arrow. An arrow that Aya had been aiming straight at my heart. If he had wanted to break it, he didn't need an arrow, I thought bitterly. He had done enough when he had stood over me with a sword pointed at my throat. He had wanted to kill me. All because I was . . . what had he said? A dragon. That's right. I was a dragon. Immortal. The healing scar from an arrow that should of killed me had I been human proved that.
Remembering the pain of the transformation, I reached around behind me and tried to see my back. Though it ached to try, I twisted my arm enough to touch my shoulder blades. Nothing. No wings, no scars, nothing but my smooth skin that had always been there. I sighed in relief and then turned my attention to my skin, flipping my arms over and back to look at them in the sunlight. There was no glint, no shine, no gold. Only the slight tint of shimmer added to the pink under the surface was the only difference I could see from the normal flush that my skin naturally had.
Careful of Marlen, I stood and tiptoed outside, slipping on my shoes which had been conveniently placed by the door. I walked through the grass of the small yard, heading towards the sparkling stream to wash my face. When I got to the sloping bank, I knelt and bent over the steadily streaming water. The person I saw in the reflection was frightening. Though my makeup was gone, my face was haggard, my expression shocked and afraid. It was the face of someone who had just had the floor ripped out from her, and I suppose I had.
I was no longer the sheltered princess anymore-- No. That wasn't right. There was no way I could be that princess. I didn't want to be a part of a world that didn't want me--and Aya had made it clear that he didn't want me in any way. That reality hurt more than I could describe. I had lived so long believing in the dream I had built of him in my mind, the happily-ever-after-fairytale that I thought I had earned. I had been a good girl; I hadn't strayed far, I had done my part and played the princess, I had learned the rules. . . I had waited. . . But it hadn't been enough. Nothing had been enough. Nothing had been real. It had all been an illusion that Aya had created to keep me bound to the role he had assigned me. Well, I wasn't going to play along anymore.
With angry tears stinging my eyes, I pulled off the golden earrings and dropped them to the grass. It took a bit of tugging and unpinning, but the delicate crown went next into the pile. Last from my hair were the hairpins. The multitude of metal flowers and stick-like clips jingled as I dropped them unceremoniously atop the other jewels, feeling lighter as each was cast aside. After I pulled out the rest of the hairpins, letting my hair fall down my back, I pulled off the rope-like necklace that Aya had sent me when I was sixteen, uncaring as I put it on the top of the pile, finally finished. If I had been wearing those heavy robes Aya claimed were dresses, I would have gotten rid of those too. I wanted nothing to remind me of him, nothing to tie me to him anymore. I wanted to wash him away as easily as I washed my face in the water of the stream. I wanted to wash everything away.
But it wasn't that easy. It was never that easy. I couldn't believe I hadn't seen the signs. They had all been there. Well, not the dragon thing, though I thought I had heard one of the maids call me the "Dragon Princess" once. I had never seen her after that, so I had forgotten almost instantly. Now, the memory stood out like a blast of cold water. I was exactly what they had all been whispering about, exactly what they feared. I was the princess with the red hair, the one that had to be kept away from the capitol and civilization. I was everything I had never wanted to be. I just wanted to be normal. I wanted family, friends, a normal life. Now I knew that I would never have what I wanted. Not really. Because I wasn't human.
Hold still. Since you're practically immortal, this will take a while.
Aya's words rattled through my head with a hollow finality. Immortal, that's what he had said.
I let out a sad breath, wondering what the hell I was supposed to do now.
"Raven?" I looked behind me to see Marlen floating a few feet away. "Are you all right? You shouldn't be moving about yet."
I turned back to my reflection, staring at it and wondering who that girl was. "What am I, Marlen? Am I no longer me?"
Within seconds, Marlen was on my shoulder, cuddling against my cheek in her manner of a hug. "Of course you're you. Who else would you be? Just because you find out something about yourself that you didn't know doesn't mean that you've changed on the inside. You're still Raven."
"Yeah," I agreed, half-hearted. I was still Raven. I had to remember that, even if my blood wasn't what I had thought it was my entire life. I stood angrily and made my way back into the shack, looking around. When I found a knife hanging on the wall, I grabbed it and walked back outside and to the stream. Watching my reflection, I grabbed a chunk of my hair--the hair that deemed me so different than everyone else, the hair that I had hated all of my life-- and sliced it off.
"Raven!" Marlen protested. Wanting the blood-red tresses to disappear, I continued cutting my hair until Marlen flung herself at my hand, stopping me. "Stop!" she cried, her voice teary. "Your beautiful hair. . . Oh, Raven. ."
"I want it gone!" I seethed. "This stupid hair is what lets people know what I am, right? This is why they're so scared, why no one got close to me or gave a damn about whether I lived or died all these years! I don't want it anymore." I sank to the ground, frustrated and crying and just wanting to crawl into a hole somewhere. I brought my knees to my chest and wrapped my arms around them. "I don't want it."
All of the sudden, Marlen was my size and taking the knife from my hand. She knelt behind me and pulled my hair over my shoulders. I had cut my hair so short on one side that it seemed impossible to salvage. Marlen went to work, sawing at my hair until it was even on all sides. When she was done, my hair was just past my chin in a straight line. It was completely different, waving instead of falling straight like it had with it was longer, but it was still red.
"Raven," Marlen started, waiting until I turned to look at her. "You can't change who you are. You can only accept it." She smiled at me softly, sadly. As if she were talking about herself instead of me as she reached out and touched the shorten strands of my hair. "It's not about why you were born or what race you are--it's not even about how people view you. Your life is yours. You can prove them all wrong just by becoming the person you want to be. No one said you had to be what they think you are. Create your own destiny."
Create my own destiny? Was that possible? How would I even start?
As the wheels in my mind started working, turning over on themselves to try and find some sort of solution, something clicked into place. Determination and a new goal lighted within me and I rose, ready to carry it out. It wasn't exactly what I wanted, but it wasn't what anyone else had wanted either. However, that didn't matter. The point was, I would be alive and I wouldn't turn into the terrible monster everyone thought I would become. I could deal with trying to look in the mirror later.
Water swept around Marlen and she was the size of my fist again, floating in front of me. "What is it? You've decided something."
"Yes," I told her, wiping my eyes in a very un-princess-like gesture. I squared my shoulders. "I'm going to the Disenchanted Forest."
"What?" she asked, alarmed. "Why?"
My gaze grew distant as I recalled a night that seemed so far away and the words I had once taken as a heartfelt warning that now seemed to be my only salvation. "Because those who go in disappear."
A crash and an "oof!" turned my attention behind me and I spun to see a woman in a red tunic and black leggings sprawled out on the ground. Her long, blondish-brown hair made me envious even as it fell forward into her eyes, coming loose from the pigtails she had made at the base of her neck. She lifted her head and blew her bangs out of her face, looking at us with large, round, brown eyes. Her smile was big and delighted as she picked herself off the ground, her full lips pulling back to reveal straight, white teeth. She was beautiful and looked to be in her mid-twenties, if her curves and ample breasts were anything to go by. She tightened her belt with a tug and said, "Glad to see you're up and about. I was getting worried. It's been two days since Marlen brought you here. I thought for sure you were gonna die right there on my floor a few times, but she told me you'd heal right up and-- look at you! Right as rain and just as pretty." Her expression turned sour for a minute as she looked me up and down. "Your hair was better long." She shrugged, switching the subject again as her eyes brightened with adventure. "You say you're going to the Disenchanted Forest? I wanna--"
"Panelle!" a voice shouted in reprimand just before its owner jumped down from a tree, landing lightly on his feet next to. . . Panelle. He was outrageously tall with short, black hair and angled brows over kind, dark eyes. His face was stunning--almost as handsome as Harris's had been, but he was imposing enough to make you wish you had someone to hide behind. "I thought I told you to be careful."
"I was being careful," Panelle complained, her pretty face forming a pout. "I just didn't get my landing right this time."
The man gave the sigh of a martyr before turning his attention to us. "I apologize for her. She's an idiot."
"I am not!" Panelle protested.
"You just fell out of a tree," the man pointed out mercilessly with a glare. She stayed quite and he turned back to us. "I'm Lippen and this is Panelle. We're friends of Marlen's and we've been taking care of you these past few days, princess."
"O-Oh," I started, trying to wrap my head around what was going on. They were human, weren't they? But they weren't running or screaming or calling me names. They weren't even putting up a false front. I didn't know how to react. "Um. . You can just call me Raven." I grimaced, glancing at my discarded jewels. "I'm no longer anyone's princess." Seems like I never had been.
Lippen stared at me unblinking. "A princess is a princess no matter what the circumstances."
"Yeah!" Panelle agreed, grabbing Lippen's arm and smiling at me. "Doesn't matter if a country's trying to kill you or there's a hefty price on your head, you're still-- Ow!" She rubbed her arm where Lippen had pinched her. "What was that for?"
Lippen frowned at her. "You have the worst mouth I've ever come across."
She stuck her tongue out him.
"There's a price on my head?" I asked, shocked.
Lippen crossed his arms, nodding. "Unfortunately. The whole country has been looking for the 'Dragon Princess', told to be on the lookout for a woman with red hair. Obviously they meant you."
I tensed, my hands clenching and unclenching at my sides. "Are you going to turn me in for money?"
He smirked. "Obviously not. If we had wanted money, you had plenty of jewels that we could steal for a higher price than what's on your head." He rolled his shoulders, his cheeks coloring as he looked away. "Besides, any friend of Marlen's is a friend of ours."
My brows drew together, but I relaxed. They seemed sincere. "Friends? But we don't even know each other."
Panelle looked just as confused as I felt. "What's that got to do with anything?"
I was taken aback, speechless. What did it have to do with anything? I certainly didn't know. I had never had friends before aside from Marlen, so I didn't know anything about what that meant or anything else, but these two people seemed nice to me. Like people I could trust. They had saved my life, after all. That had to count for something, right? Right.
"Come on," Panelle pressed, coming over and grabbing my hand. She started dragging me back to her hut. "Now that you're awake and cleaned up, we can feed you and get you some clothes. I've got to have something around her that could fit you."
"I've already brought her some clothes," Marlen said, then corrected herself. "Well, I brought you a shirt. I couldn't lift much else without being seen."
I smiled at her, grateful. I didn't think I could fit into anything Panelle had to offer. I didn't have even half of her chest. "Thanks, Marlen."
After I had changed into the long-sleeved, tunic shirt that Marlen had picked up for me (another white shirt with a V-neck, but this time without the buttons) and putting back on the now-clean vest with a hole in it, we ended up eating a thick stew at the tiny table without chairs. By the time we were finished, I'd realized that Panelle wasn't the brightest person, but she was sweet and very likable. Lippen seemed to be overly protective of her--sort of like an older brother or caretaker--and he was always wiping up the messes she made with her food, because she was didn't have manners at all. She was very curious, too, seeming to say whatever popped itself into her head without reservation or thought to the impact it could have on present company. I liked that about her. No one else had ever been so honest with me before. Well, no one apart from Marlen or Aya.
"Princess?" Panelle asked, her eyes wide and curious. "Are you okay?"
I jerked straight, gritting my teeth and blinking away the tears I promised myself not to cry anymore. I put my spoon down. "Yes. I'm fine. Would you please not call me that, though?" I offered her a tentative smile. "We're friends, right? Just call me 'Raven'."
"Raven?" Lippen said with a close-lipped smile. "Pretty name."
I swallowed, stopping my hand from reaching up to grab my hair. "T-Thank you. They said I was named that before I was born, because the Emperor was hoping I'd have black hair."
"But you don't," a familiar voice said and a chill went down my spine as the doorway darkened. I turned to see a narrow-eyed, bitter Aya looking just as pristine as he had on the day we had met. Once again, he had a strung bow pointed at my chest. The air in the room seemed to freeze. "Your hair is red."
My eyes widened and I dove out of the way as he let loose the arrow, the metal tip embedding itself in the table with a thud. I heard the scraping of metal on metal and looked over my shoulder to see him drawing a sword as he easily batted Marlen out of his way with a hard swat when she shot herself at him. He took a step towards me and I scooted back, sucking in a scared breath as he pressed it to my throat yet again. "Don't move," he ordered the room. "Unless you want her to die right now."
"W-What's going on?!" Panelle asked with obvious shock. Both she and Lippen had seemed to not do well in small spaces, having both tripped in a tangle of legs and arms as they had tried to get out from between the table and wall. The stew had gone everywhere, soaking into the wood of the floor and making the room smell delicious. However, I had suddenly lost my appetite.
I resisted the urge to swallow as he pressed the blade closer. He smiled a little bitterly and sadly. "You didn't tell them? Made friends already and you're already keeping secrets, Raven?"
I glared at him, my heart hurting. I hissed as his blade cut into my skin, a warm trickle of blood sliding down my throat. "Do not address me so informally," I gritted angrily. "You no longer have the right." I thought I saw his eyes flash hurt, but they steeled so fast that I knew I must have been mistaken. I shoved that aside and continued. "Besides, the friends I have won't care what I am."
"You think so?" he asked callously. "I don't."
"I don't care what you think."
"Neither do I," another familiar voice said and I looked beyond him to see Harris standing there, setting a sword on his brother's shoulder as if it were the easiest thing in the world. His expression was hard, no longer the smiling and pleasant features he'd seemed to share with everyone so easily. "Lower your weapon, Aya. You are not to touch her."
"Who says?" Aya quipped, unmoving. He glared at me. "You're can't order me about."
Harris finally smiled, but it wasn't a smile I liked. "No, I can't. But Father can."
Surprised, Aya jerked as if slapped, spinning, leaving me forgotten. Panelle grabbed my wrist, yanking me around the table and shoving me behind them while he was distracted. "Father? What are you talking about? He was the one who put the kill on her head!"
Harris sheathed his sword, pulling a roll of paper out of his shirt and letting it roll open. Scrawled throughout it in slanting handwriting was more than likely something that would save me. I hoped. It better be, because the Emperor's signature was on the bottom and I didn't want to find out that the price on my head had been raised or that an Imperial Prince couldn't kill me as a technicality. Aya wasted no time sheathing his sword to pick up the bottom and scan his eyes across the paper.
"As you can see, little brother," Harris said, giving me a smile around Aya's concentrating . "Raven's life is now her choice."
I peeked out from behind Panelle's shoulder. "My choice?" I squeaked.
"Yes." Harris let go of the paper, coming over to me. He stopped when Lippen tensed, smiling politely and holding out a hand to me, waiting. Nervous and unsure, I reached out a shaking hand and ignored the butterflies that had settled in my stomach to take his hand. He pulled me to my feet and around the table, careful of Lippen and Panelle. He reached out and I winced as he ran his thumb across the cut on my neck, wiping away the blood. "You have a choice to make. You can live, but the Emperor has a job to give you."
"It's a suicide mission," Aya interrupted, his voice outraged.
Marlen's angry voice greeted him. "Then what do you care? You were just going to kill her a moment ago."
He seemed at a loss. "But I--"
"Anyway," Harris continued, his smile turning a little stiff. "The job is that you must go into the Disenchanted Forest and slay the dragon that threatens to destroy the capitol."
"Threatens to-- What?" I asked confused. "What are you talking about? There's another dragon?"
"She was human once," Harris started, his expression going solemn as he crossed his arms. "Like you. But something happened to her--no one knows what--and she suddenly changed. She went on a rampage through the cities and towns, destroying everything. She didn't stop until the Emperor was dead. After that, she retreated back to the Disenchanted Forest. All that was left of her was an egg." He pinned me with serious eyes. "An egg that we've had for nearly three hundred years. An egg that--until eighteen years ago--we thought would never hatch."
I swallowed, my heart sinking as outrage filled me. Why had no one told me any of this! "You want me to go and kill my mother?! Why? She's in the forest, right? She hasn't done anything wrong!"
"She has," Aya gritted, his arms also crossed and his expression cold. "She's reported to come out of the forest every hundred years looking for you." He glared at me, his eyes turning to ice. "When she doesn't find you, she destroys the capitol and everything surrounding it."
"Many people die, Raven," Harris said softly. "We've sent people after her time and time again, but no one returns." His grip on my hand tightened, his expression turning concerned. "This is your only option. If you don't accept the Emperor's offer to kill your mother in exchange for your life, we'll have to kill you. I don't want to kill you."
"Someone does," Lippen growled. He and Panelle had picked each other up off the floor, standing near me and looking tense, listening to every word. Lippen wouldn't take his eyes off Aya, who was glaring at him for that comment. I really liked them.
"Well?"Harris asked, his thumb rubbing circles on the back of my hand. "What will you do?"
I didn't hesitate. "I'll go." Though it was hard to say that I would kill my own mother, I had never known her and if she killed the innocent, then I didn't want to know her--even if it was for my sake. That just meant that the blood of thousands of lives was on my hands, not just hers. I couldn't let it continue. Besides, if she was searching for me all this time, then I would just stay there and she would never bother with anyone again. "I'll do it."
Aya grabbed my free arm, spinning me. His eyes were flashing fire now and I shrank back, afraid. "You can't! I won't allow you to! Didn't I tell you not to go there? Anyone who goes into the forest never comes out again!"
I jerked my arm out of his grasp, glaring at him and moving closer to Harris. My voice was flat and emotionless as I spoke. "You don't order me about, your Highness. I will do as I please. It just so happens that I was going to the Disenchanted Forest anyway."
Shock covered his features and I thought I saw an abundant amount of sadness underneath it. "Why?" he asked in a small voice. "Why go there? I told you that--"
"Those who go in don't come back out," I finished. I stared at him with unblinking, disillusioned, accusing eyes. "I remember. That's exactly why. No one wants me around, no one cares, so I will disappear."
The room was silent and Marlen floated to my shoulder, perching there and grabbing hold of my hair. I was sure she had a defiant, protective look on her face as she glared at Aya, but I was too busy watching all of the emotions flash through his eyes. There was anger, self-loathing, blame, confusion, the obvious want to say something and the pain from holding back whatever it was, and then sorrow. There was so much sorrow that, if I had had any pity left for him, my heart would have broken, but I just couldn't gather up enough of anything for him. There was nothing left to feel for him at all except the disillusioned dream I had held onto--and that just made me sad and slightly numb.
I let go of Harris's hand and turned to Lippen and Panelle. "Will you help me?" I asked, unsure. "I'm not sure if I can get there on my own and it would be nice to have. . friends."
Panelle's face brightened, her eyes lighting up as she nearly bounced where she stood. "Yeah! Let's go kill your mom!"
Lippen's head fell into his hand with a slap and he shook his head as if ashamed. Harris smiled widely and I said, "Uh. . Thanks, I guess. . . We had better get going then." With a sweep of my vest, I strode past Aya and into the sunlight, everyone following after me. I stopped only a few feet out, shocked to see that there were tied horses waiting, grazing on the grass--four of them. "Just a random question," I threw over my shoulder. "How did you find me?"
Aya answered first. "I followed Marlen when she came to get you some clothes."
Harris's cheerful answer was next. "And I followed Aya. I had my attendants drop off the horses."
I raised a brow at him. "You knew I was going to accept the Emperor's offer?"
His smile turned warm. "I had a feeling."
I felt my cheeks flame and then frowned at a more distressing problem. "I can't ride a horse."
Harris blinked and then smiled, his eyes brightening. "You'll just ride with m--"
"Me," Aya said, stepping close to me. "She'll ride with me."
I wrinkled my nose. "Actually, I think I'd like to ride with Harris, if that's okay with him?" I glanced at him, worried.
He put an arm around my shoulder. "Perfectly. I'll be glad to help."
"You're coming with us?" Panelle asked, swinging easily onto a horse. She patted it when it whinnied, calming him.
"We're not letting Raven go alone," Harris told her. He swung up onto his own horse, reaching down a hand to me. I watched Lippen swing up onto his own horse, settling in comfortably.
I went to step towards Harris, but was stopped by Aya yet again. "Wait," he begged.
I sighed, irritated. "What?"
Aya reached into his pocket and I watched him pull out the roped necklace he had sent me two years ago. It sparkled in the sunlight, the golden chains catching the rays and sending the large pale purple gem that connected a few inches before the ends glittering. "This is yours," he told me, handing it out. "I sent it to you." His face scrunched up in obvious anxiety. "Why did you leave it behind?"
"Why did you pick it up?" I countered. I kept my arms to my side, my eyes hard as he searched for what to say. What did he want? What was he trying to do?
His eyes were big and watery before narrowing. "You don't want it?"
Rephrase: "I don't need it anymore, Highness. It's meaningless." I turned back to Harris and took his hand, not even glancing behind me. Everything had changed and I needed a new future. I hoped that Harris would help me find one.