Stubborn

Let’s get the story straight
You were a poison
You flooded through my veins
You left me broken

A really big part me hoped Jordan was kidding. He wasn’t.

Emma, Aaron, and I shifted through rows of hockey fans in the full arena. I had the luck of somehow hitting every single bag of popcorn that people held, having to string along a series of ‘sorry’ and ‘excuse me’ and, occasionally, a ‘my bad’. Aaron and Emma didn’t have any better luck, considering they felt obligated to keep their hands linked at all times as they hopped over people’s feet, looking for our seats.

Finally, we found the row printed neatly on each of our tickets that a few of the guys on the team (Jordan included) got for us. Something told me that from the countless days Aaron spent with the guys, we wouldn’t be losing touch with them anytime soon. Though, I had to admit, the night at the bar was full of many laughs to go along with those annoying moments compliments of Jordan.

“These are pretty good seats,” Emma said as the three of us sat down simultaneously. It was sad to think that we hung around so often that we had grown in sync with each other. “I should have gotten to know hockey players a lot sooner.”

Aaron leaned forward on his chair. “Hey, I’m a hockey player.”

“Right,” Emma replied with a small laugh followed by a pat on his shoulder. I chuckled and shook my head. I knew what she meant – getting to know professional hockey players. And by ‘getting to know’ she meant dating. It was amusing watching simple messages like this fly right over guys’ heads. After a few more minutes of teasing Aaron and shifting our bodies so other people could walk to the seats next to us, the game finally began.

It had been so long since I’d gone to a hockey game that I’d almost forgotten the adrenaline rush you got watching enormous men push each other against sideboards and start fights for seemingly no reason. I guess you could say hockey was a family tradition for me. The men in the family were expected to play hockey and the women were expected to marry men who played hockey. Growing up it was “hockey this” and “hockey that”. My dad even had an enormous Bobby Orr poster in our basement and a season schedule of all the teams next to the TV, as though, by some chance, we would forget to watch hockey. I liked hockey...a lot. But I couldn’t say I loved it. ‘Love’ was a strong word that wouldn’t be coming out of my mouth again.

The third period bell went off, securing Pittsburgh’s win against the Atlanta Thrashers. I watched as groups of fans began standing up from their seats, giving a good stretch, and then moving down to the doors. Aaron had finished the bag of popcorn that he had gotten during the second intermission and was now talking about what he thought of the game. If you knew Aaron at all, you’d know he wanted to play for the Penguins and usually analyzed their games every time we watched them together.

“Letang is a good defenseman, but Gonchar is my favourite,” he said, looking out at the now empty ice rink where a few articles of clothing lay crumpled. Fans just couldn’t restrain themselves.

I nodded, following his gaze, and then looked at Emma who had stepped in gum and was trying to scrub her shoe clean. “Too bad he got traded.”

Aaron let his head fall back, his dark locks hanging. “Ugh, don’t remind me.”

“But, he’s retiring soon, right?” Emma said as she continued trying to scrape the pink mess from the bottom of her sneaker. Aaron let out another disappointed grunt and nodded. The arena was empty now, leaving an eerie silence where the sound of screaming fans used to be. Emma, finally getting the gum off her shoe (or most of it at least) stood up and grabbed her bag. “We should go before they close this place down.”

Aaron and I nodded in unison before I shoved my hands into the pockets of my sweater. Immediately, it felt like something was missing.

“Where’s my cell phone?” I asked, stopping dead and preventing them from moving any further. I’d had that phone for three years, it had been through everything with me and I wasn’t prepared to lose it now. Aaron and Emma looked at the floor.

“Are you sure you brought it?” he asked.

I rolled my eyes. “Of course I brought it. Why would I go anywhere without my cell phone?” He shrugged. I let out an aggravated sigh and ran a hand through my hair. And the night was going so well up until that point. “Okay, I’ll look for it and meet you guys outside.” I couldn’t very well hold them hostage until we all found the phone. If worse came to worse, I’d go to the lost and found and ask them if anyone had turned it in. They both nodded and slid passed me to the end of the row. I quickly kneeled down and began looking under seats. In the ten minutes, all I saw was gum, crushed popcorn, and a yellow liquid that I didn’t want to inspect any further. Finally, behind a thrown bag of popcorn a few feet away from our seats, was the glimmer of silver. I smiled and walked towards it, lifting the bag to reveal my tiny, rectangular cell phone. It must have popped out of my pocket during the fit of excitement Emma, Aaron and I had when Pittsburgh had a break-away.

I dusted off any imperfections on the reflective screen as I slid across the row of seats and walked down the stairs into the main area of the building. Carefully, I placed the phone back into my pocket, keeping my hand there with it in case it decided to fall out again. Losing a cell phone was like losing a little part of you.

“Hey,” I heard from behind me. It was said fast and harshly, urging me to spin around and face the person damping on my now happy mood. Could it be a security guard, wondering why I had stayed later than everyone else? Nope, it was just Jordan; drenched in what I hoped was water and bleeding a bit above his left eye. He’d managed to make the imperfection suit him. I let out a small sigh and stopped walking. In seconds, his long legs had moved him in front of me; his black hockey bag swinging on his shoulder like a pendulum. “I didn’t think you’d actually come.”

I licked my lips, hoping Aaron and Emma weren’t too mad at me for taking so long. “I guess have a soft spot for hockey.”

He nodded his head slowly, as though impressed. “Well, at least you have a soft spot for something.” There it was, the first insulting comment to escape his lips in the two seconds we were talking. He liked to push my buttons, that much was obvious, I just didn’t think I’d stand there and take it for this long. I understand that most of my life I’ve spent preaching about how women’s roles shouldn’t be the same as how they were all those years ago, but I was still feminine, despite how much I tried to bend the rules. My question is: Is chivalry actually dead? Admittedly, it was hard for people to deal with my over-the-top mentality at times. Jordan was just one of many that found his own way to deal.

I pursed my lips at his comment, knowing that neither of us would find reason in our arguments. “I’m just going to leave,” I said, tightening my hold on the cell phone in my pocket, as I spun around. Sure, I liked a bit of friendly banter (Aaron and I were usually like that), but with Jordan it was different; it was like he was trying to just make me break. And right now, between leaving my friends waiting for me in the parking lot and the shit-load of work for school, I just didn’t want to deal with this. I guess Jordan and I have more in common than I thought. We are both utterly and complete un-manageable.

I had only taken one step towards the doors when I heard Jordan’s voice again. “Wait.” His tone was – dare I say? – remorseful. Slowly, I turned around, trying to hide how confused I actually was at his sudden shift of demeanor. I stood, waiting. Raising his hand, he ruffled his short, blonde hair, making it glisten under the artificial lights. “A few of the guys and I are going to a club tomorrow a block from The Tavern.” Again, I waited, not sure what he was getting at. “You and your friends should come.”

“Um...I don’t –” A club? I had never been to a club in my life. To be honest, I really had no idea what people did in clubs. I knew there was drinking and some sort of gyrating against each other. Bottom line was that I was positive clubs and I didn’t mix well together. I let my sentence cut off there and licked my lips. “I’ll let Aaron know.” Jordan nodded, that small smirk on his features, then turned around and began walking down the hall. I stared after him for a few minutes, trying to take in his strange composure.

Walking outside and feeling the cool night air blow against my face made this all a little easier to take in. Jordan and I were at each other’s throats since day one. Did this invitation mean he was going to ease up on me? Probably not; I could tell how much it amused him getting under my skin. In the parking lot, Aaron’s was the only car left. I sped towards it, holding the cell phone tightly in my pocket, and let out a small gagging sound when I saw he and Emma making out against the hood.

“Don’t mind me,” I said, trying to sound indifferent, as I moved passed them and to the back doors, “I only need a ride from you guys.” Emma pulled away from Aaron and the two got into the car. “So,” I began as soon as the three of us finished putting on our seatbelts. I wasn’t really sure how to bring this next part up. Why couldn’t Jordan have just made this easier and left me out of it? “I ran into Jordan inside.” Emma shot me a look from the passenger’s rear view mirror. I ignored it, knowing what she was thinking. No, Jordan and I weren’t secretly dating. No, I hadn’t fallen madly in love with him. And, no, I will not be talking to you about it. “He said he and the guys are going to some club tomorrow near The Tavern and that we should go.”

Aaron nodded. “Max already called me about it. I told him we’d all go...unless you have something else to do.” He eyed me from the rear view mirror.

Again, clubs just weren’t my thing. “Well, I –”

“You’re coming,” Emma cut me off. She turned around in the seat to face me and Aaron let out a small laugh. “You need to have some fun.”

“I do have fun,” I replied swiftly.

She rolled her eyes, the city lights clearly reflected in her amber irises. “Hanging out with Aaron and I at bars isn’t what I was talking about.” Of course; she was talking about guys. That’s what she always talked about. “A lot of the Pens are pretty hot,” she continued with a smirk. I couldn’t help but smile at the face she was giving me; her eyebrows wiggling humorously.

“Hey!” Aaron exclaimed. “Your boyfriend’s sitting right here!” Emma laughed then leaned in to give him a kiss on the cheek affectionately. “Yeah, yeah, yeah,” he said, waving her off. I chuckled and leaned my head against the cool window.

So, a club...with me in it. I guess it’s always good to try new things.