Status: a work in progress

There You Go Again Being Beautiful You

Matthew

I watched as Gena left the room to get us some real food and to let Zacky know that everything was going to be alright though my heart didn’t feel like everything was going to be ok. It felt like the whole world had come crashing down all at once. I looked back down at Charity to notice a few tears beginning to fall down her cheeks.

“oh char…”I cooed softly taking my thumb and gently wiping away the tears that were falling. “Don’t cry. Everything’s going to be ok.” I made a lousy attempt at comforting her when I didn’t know what was wrong. I wondered what she was thinking what could have such a strong girl so upset.

“What if something happens to me?” She asked her blue eyes filled with tears as she looked at me. I shook my head I couldn’t deal with the thought of something happening to her. She was the mother of my child and she meant a lot to me…maybe more then she should.

“Nothing’s going to happen to you” I tried to reassure her but she began to shake her head slightly and more tears slipped down her face.

“You can’t promise me that.” She cried softly “If something happens to me…” she stopped to take a deep breath and try to make her voice stop shaking. “Promise me you won’t let anything happen to Maddison. Promise me that you will spoil her until she can’t stand it anymore and promise me…” she took another deep breath as tears rolled down her cheeks. “You’ll remind her of me all the time and remind her just how much I love her.”

“Stop, please,” My voice came out almost broken and I knew I was fighting hard not to fall apart at the idea of losing Charity. I couldn’t stand it, I felt as if someone was stabbing a hot poker through my heart just talking about it. “Nothing’s going to happen to you Charity. You’ll always be here to remind her of your love yourself. I will not let anything happen to you.” I promised firmly even though I knew I would be working against impossible forces.

“Just promise you’ll keep Val away from her” when those words left her mouth I just about fell off the bed. I had been thinking about that…what if I had lost her? I would have to raise Maddison by myself with Val in the house…I couldn’t put Maddison through that. Hell, I hated having Val around when it was my days to have Maddison because all Val wanted to do was fight with me.

“I promise you right now that, if something were to happen to you” I stressed the ‘if’ more than needed “Val would get nowhere near Maddison. I’d probably break it off with her. I don’t want Val around Maddison after today.” I admitted and I watched her eyes grow wide then go back to normal size.