Status: Work In Progress
All I Know Is To Keep Walking Round The Bend
Broken Hearted Girl
‘I call your name,
You look my way,
It’s clear you trust each word I say,
When life is long and problems come,
You’ll always be my only one.
So now we’re standing face to face,
And with one look your eyes embrace me,
Squeeze away each haunting fear,
And say the words I long to hear’
Suzannah looked straight at Johnny with tears in her eyes. Slowly she walked towards him until they were so close that there was only a hairs breadth between them. She could kiss him if she only shifted her weight forward and rose onto her tiptoes. She wanted to. God, she wanted to so bad. However, with some feat of will, she managed to stay where she was. He hadn’t moved. Was this a good or a bad sign? She held her breath and hoped she’d done enough...
***
A year earlier...
“Are you coming Su?” Arianna’s voice floated up through the open window, “To the party? Come on girlie, you can’t stay broken hearted forever!”
Suzannah was inclined to disagree. She could if she so wanted. She could hole herself up in her bedroom for the rest of her life and cry herself to sleep every night, while dressing entirely in black and writing depressing poetry. But that was not what she wanted. What she wanted was Joey back and no amount of crying was ever going to make that happen.
Actually, recently Suzannah had realised she didn’t even want Joey. What she wanted was the false image of himself he’d projected while he was busy getting her to go out with him. Once they were together he treated her, quite frankly, like shit. He’d bullied her, he’d cheated from the very start and he’d attempted to change her. While she was with him, her friends watched the vibrant, sassy and smart girl they knew and loved reduced to a cowering wreck, who while still retaining some of her spirit, had virtually lost all sense of self worth.
She had become the poster girl for self esteem, Suzannah thought with a wry smile. How very ironic. She had criticised a friend for letting her boyfriend do something similar and yet she had allowed Joey to abuse her without putting up a fight. Of course when he plied sweet, innocent Grace with alcohol in order to get her so drunk she’d sleep with him, Suzannah had snapped out of it and dumped him on the spot. He beat her up. She called the police. Oh, that had felt so sweet!
Of course soon after she’d realised that she missed having a boyfriend (even a rubbish one) and had descended into her current state. After leaving her to mourn for two weeks, she was now being forced out of it. Arianna simply wouldn’t let her become a recluse. Thank the lord for Arianna.
“It’s a student party, it’ll suck!” Suzannah couldn’t resist. Arianna was a year older than Suzannah and they had been best friends since nursery. When Suzannah had moved to York from her home in Bath, they had both been gutted. They had spend time together practically every week for 15 years and now Suzannah was doing her A levels the other end of the country! But Arianna had found a way to reunite the two friends. She was doing her degree at York University while Suzannah planned to apply to Leeds so that they would still be geographically close. Always the party girl, Arianna had quickly settled into a role as thewild child of the year and was always going out clubbing or to house parties. Suzannah found them alright, though they all seemed to be the same.
“Oi you cheeky mare! Just for that I’ll go alone.” This wasn’t a serious threat, but the consequences of the beautiful and trusting Arianna going out alone were not ones that Suzannah wanted to think of.
“I’ll be down in a few seconds,” she shouted, “just let me change and put some eyeliner on.” She quickly grabbed a billowy cream chiffon dress from her wardrobe, pulled it on and belted it with a thin studded belt which wrapped several times around her tiny waist. Applying smoky eyes, Suzannah could hear Arianna coming up the stairs, obviously bored of waiting by the car. She turned away from her dressing table mirror as her best friend entered the room. She grinned and received a delighted smile in return.
“You’re back! The fairy princess is back!”
You look my way,
It’s clear you trust each word I say,
When life is long and problems come,
You’ll always be my only one.
So now we’re standing face to face,
And with one look your eyes embrace me,
Squeeze away each haunting fear,
And say the words I long to hear’
Suzannah looked straight at Johnny with tears in her eyes. Slowly she walked towards him until they were so close that there was only a hairs breadth between them. She could kiss him if she only shifted her weight forward and rose onto her tiptoes. She wanted to. God, she wanted to so bad. However, with some feat of will, she managed to stay where she was. He hadn’t moved. Was this a good or a bad sign? She held her breath and hoped she’d done enough...
***
A year earlier...
“Are you coming Su?” Arianna’s voice floated up through the open window, “To the party? Come on girlie, you can’t stay broken hearted forever!”
Suzannah was inclined to disagree. She could if she so wanted. She could hole herself up in her bedroom for the rest of her life and cry herself to sleep every night, while dressing entirely in black and writing depressing poetry. But that was not what she wanted. What she wanted was Joey back and no amount of crying was ever going to make that happen.
Actually, recently Suzannah had realised she didn’t even want Joey. What she wanted was the false image of himself he’d projected while he was busy getting her to go out with him. Once they were together he treated her, quite frankly, like shit. He’d bullied her, he’d cheated from the very start and he’d attempted to change her. While she was with him, her friends watched the vibrant, sassy and smart girl they knew and loved reduced to a cowering wreck, who while still retaining some of her spirit, had virtually lost all sense of self worth.
She had become the poster girl for self esteem, Suzannah thought with a wry smile. How very ironic. She had criticised a friend for letting her boyfriend do something similar and yet she had allowed Joey to abuse her without putting up a fight. Of course when he plied sweet, innocent Grace with alcohol in order to get her so drunk she’d sleep with him, Suzannah had snapped out of it and dumped him on the spot. He beat her up. She called the police. Oh, that had felt so sweet!
Of course soon after she’d realised that she missed having a boyfriend (even a rubbish one) and had descended into her current state. After leaving her to mourn for two weeks, she was now being forced out of it. Arianna simply wouldn’t let her become a recluse. Thank the lord for Arianna.
“It’s a student party, it’ll suck!” Suzannah couldn’t resist. Arianna was a year older than Suzannah and they had been best friends since nursery. When Suzannah had moved to York from her home in Bath, they had both been gutted. They had spend time together practically every week for 15 years and now Suzannah was doing her A levels the other end of the country! But Arianna had found a way to reunite the two friends. She was doing her degree at York University while Suzannah planned to apply to Leeds so that they would still be geographically close. Always the party girl, Arianna had quickly settled into a role as thewild child of the year and was always going out clubbing or to house parties. Suzannah found them alright, though they all seemed to be the same.
“Oi you cheeky mare! Just for that I’ll go alone.” This wasn’t a serious threat, but the consequences of the beautiful and trusting Arianna going out alone were not ones that Suzannah wanted to think of.
“I’ll be down in a few seconds,” she shouted, “just let me change and put some eyeliner on.” She quickly grabbed a billowy cream chiffon dress from her wardrobe, pulled it on and belted it with a thin studded belt which wrapped several times around her tiny waist. Applying smoky eyes, Suzannah could hear Arianna coming up the stairs, obviously bored of waiting by the car. She turned away from her dressing table mirror as her best friend entered the room. She grinned and received a delighted smile in return.
“You’re back! The fairy princess is back!”
♠ ♠ ♠
So I have finally restarted my writing. Please do let me know what you think.