The Adventure

Moonlight illuminated me every night. Wherever I went it was there to keep me company. I didn’t ask for it, but it was as if it wanted to come along for the journey… or should I say the great adventure? I was always afraid of being alone, it wasn’t really the fear of not having someone, but the fear of not being noticed. Maybe that was the reason why I left everything behind, they never appreciated me or anything I did, I was just a piece of a puzzle trying to find the correct place to fit in.

Eventually, I gave up trying to fit in. I remember the day when blending in was just not enough, I quit my job and went home gathering a few belongings and put them inside my backpack, I was fed up with always being told what was wrong and what was acceptable. I walked out of my home not looking back, not even when my mother was shouting for me to come back. I had made up my mind. There was no going back.

Branches from trees began to shake as the sun began to set down, and the moon began to shine. I remember staring at them, hoping they had the answers to the questions I didn’t know. I really didn’t know where I was going, or what I was going to do. I walked under the moonlight and for the first time in a very long time I felt free, I could do anything I wanted. I remember coming across a daisy field, I ran as I smiled and that night the flowers were my bed.

Sometimes I thought about going back home telling my parents everything was just a misunderstanding, but every time I tried to go back I remembered all the things I hated about that town, and instead I continued walking. I would eat once a day, making sure to spend as little money as I could. I didn’t know when or where my adventure would end, I just knew there was still a long road ahead.

Misunderstood, that’s how I felt every day living in my town. Nobody understood the things I loved, they would tell me to come back down to earth. Maybe that’s why I didn’t fit in, I lived life with my head in the clouds, rather than living in the real world. People didn’t understand that I didn’t want to be like my mother, I didn’t want to be stuck somewhere where I didn’t belong. I knew she was unhappy because it was too late to leave her life, but not for me and I took the chance.

Instead of following my towns stupid traditions, I broke free. Enough was enough. I wasn’t going to stay in a place where women where only valued for being a wife and a mother. I was more than that, I am more than that. I can almost imagine what my life would have been if I had stayed, I would have become my own mother. I would be stuck doing the same routine every single day, I wouldn’t even have time to feel anything.

Alternating thoughts became normal as the days flew by. My thoughts kept going back and forth whether it had been a good idea to have left without having any sort of plan. But I always went to sleep with a smile, I knew I had made the right choice.

Sharp pain began to run through my body, I knew it was from the lack of comfort, always sleeping on the ground at nights, and always walking during the day, I only rested when I ate, but that was only once a day. I began to wonder what other people thought of me, they probably saw me as a homeless drug addict, I would have thought the same thing. With my knotty hair, old and most of the time dirty clothes, and nothing but a backpack on my back I began to wonder if I was ever going to make it to my destination.

Mysteries, that’s all the world is made of. Everything is a mystery until we discover whatever it is. I never really knew what life was in other towns, I used to think every town was just like the next one, all with the same rules, expectations, and traditions. I was wrong of course, very wrong. Two months after I left home I came to the conclusion that I had been born into the wrong family. I wasn’t meant to be a small town girl who would never see the real world. I was meant to be an adventurer.

Clouded days began as the winter approached, I knew sooner or later it would start raining, or snowing if I was lucky. Except it never rained or snowed, at least not while I was on the road.

Petite… that’s what I became due to the lack of nutrients and vitamins. I had always been a small person just not petite. People in my town would always say women with meat on their bones were better than plain bones. Maybe that was another reason why I didn’t quite fit in, I wasn’t what everybody else wanted me to be, better yet, I wasn’t like everybody else in that stupid town. I guess I should be grateful for not being like them, I stood out just like the stars stand out at night in complete darkness.

Explaining is always hard, but in the end there were a lot of thing that made me want to leave. There where so many things that were bringing me down, holding me down, and taking me down. If I had stayed that would have meant they had won, and I would have given in. But now I know nothing and no one will ever bring me down because I’m strong and I do what I know is best for me.

Stop, my feet screamed when I had finally reached the end of the road. I was finally somewhere where I belonged, I was in the city far away from my old life. I remember closing my eyes and smiling, just taking in all the noises, and all the different scents. I’m home, I remember thinking.

She, she, everyone would look at me with a judging look on their face, I would just smile and keep walking. I didn’t care what people thought of me, I was finally free, I was finally me. I walked until I found a cheap motel, I paid for a night and treated myself like a princes, after everything I had been through I deserved it. Months have passed since that night, I no longer look like a homeless drug addict who is in desperate need of a shower, no, not anymore. Now I work at a book store, filling my mind up with imaginary worlds, I have roommates who understand that life is more than a routine.

Call it destiny, call it faith, call it whatever you want to. All I know is life can either be an adventure or a routine, it all depends whether you’re a risk taker or a stick in the mud.