Shut Those Legs Girl, It's Closing Time

Everything was quiet as my aunt pleaded with the seemingly stubborn stranger downstairs. I heard my aunt groan, and call my name. I went down the stairs, stopping on the last step. I could see my aunt and the back of a blond, who at the sound of my name turned around to look at me. She smiled widely, causing my heart to skip a beat. “Aunt Katie who is-”

“Jaten this is Apollo, your mother.”

My jaw dropped, and my emotions clouded my mind, thus causing me to have a lack of coordination. I fell onto the step behind me, as my ‘mother’ neared me. She held her arms out, expecting a hug. I jumped to my feet, going around her. She let her hands fall down to her sides, “Jaten, come give your mother a hug.” She frowned, creasing her eyebrows.

I shook my head, and walked away from her towards the door. I opened it, feeling a gust of wind hit me on my way out. “Jaten!” I heard my ‘mother’ call once more, I turned around, the tears streaming freely down my face. She gave me a stern look, her lips were pursed tightly, she was definitely angry by my actions. “I’m your mother and you shall address me as so.”

I stared at my ‘mother’ in disbelief, I brought my wrist to my face and brushed the tears away. “You, are not my mother, or a mother at all. You were selfish, and immature, because you were young and decided to hand me off to the first relative that would take me, you’d rather indulge yourself in drugs, and God knows what else. Well you can go back to where ever the hell you came from, because I don’t want anything to do with you.”

I took a deep breath, and stared at the woman’s horrified facial expression. She was shaking, whether it be from anger or rejection, I didn’t fucking care. I turned around taking a few steps away before turning back around to address her one last time, “I never want to see your fucking face ever again.” I spat, pulling my cell phone out of my pocket.

Without a second glance I walked down the street, the cool air causing me to shiver. I dialed a number, the only number I could think to call. Surprisingly, Shayley didn’t answer on the first ring or the second, in fact he didn’t answer it all. I hung up, confused, and lost. I sighed, and dialed once more, this time the voice of a flustered Shayley answering the phone.

“Shay?”

“OH, HEY JAE” I flinched at the loudness of his voice, and pulled the phone away from my ear.

I pressed it back against my ear, “I need you.” I whispered softly.

“WHAT WAS THAT? I CAN’T HEAR YOU JAE, IM AT THE FAIR WITH RAYN!”

I felt my heart drop into my stomach, “Shay, I need you right now…” I mumbled, my throat aching from crying.

“IM SORRY JAE I CAN’T HEAR YOU, I’LL CALL YOU AS SOON AS WE LEAVE ALRIGHT, I LOVE YOU.” I heard laughter in the background, and bit down on my bottom lip. I hung the phone up, and threw it against the concrete, cursing at the sky. I fell to my knees, and buried my face in my arms, I looked up instantly recognizing the neighborhood. I crawled over to my phone and pocketed it, struggling to get to my feet.

I saw the all too familiar Powder blue PT Cruiser in the driveway, and before I could stop myself I found myself walking up the driveway and knocking on the front door. On top of the PT Cruiser rested a blue surf board, a blue wet suit on top of it. The door opened, revealing a baffled Ken dressed clad in nothing but swim trunks.

“Jaten?” Ken said ushering me in.
He closed the door behind us, and held me out at arms length. “What’s wrong?” He asked, cupping my face.

I looked down at my feet, and wrapped my arms around his face, feeling a new onset of tears take over. “My mom, she came unannounced, and it just took me by surprise, and I just need someone to talk too.”

Ken sighed, and placed his hand on the small of my back. “Here follow me.”

Ken lead me up the stairs, and into his room where clothes were strewn all over the floor. He had a few surf boards and wet suits gathered up in a corner, I sat down on his messy bed and sighed. Ken sat down next to me, “Jae…” he trailed off.

I shook my head, I placed my hand in my hands, and cried, I let it all out, all the pent up emotions, all the anger, hate, jealousy, hurt, and abandonment. Ken wrapped his arm around me, and pulled me into his bare chest. It was warm, I felt safe there. I clutched his shoulder, and struggled to breath, as each cough made my entire body shake.

I began to speak in the middle of my cries, and Ken silenced me. He held a finger up to my lips, and stared me straight in the eyes. He laid me on my back, and brushed my hair out of my face, his sympathetic eyes never left mine, as he caressed my face gently. “Where’s that glorified boyfriend of yours?”

Ken shifted in the bed so that he was resting on his knees. “He’s not here to watch you suffer, your tears are like blood, your heart the wound. And where is here to heal you?”

“Not here.”

Ken’s fingers grazed my eyelids, closing them. I felt my breathing steady, “So whose left to save the wilting rose?”

I felt Ken’s lips on the corner of my mouth, “No one but me.”

In a matter of seconds my lips were attached to his, my arms wrapped tightly around his shoulders. It all happened so fast, the shedding of our clothes, and the tangling of our limbs, but strangely as we went to bed, my clothes that rested on the floor strewn on top his felt right. In some weird twisted way, I felt better about everything, about Shayley, and my mother. Did I love Shayley? Yes I did. Why exactly?

Because with him I wasn’t alone.

And now that Ken and I lay in bed, grasping each others bare, moist bodies, did I love him? Yes I did- Why? Because I wasn’t alone.

--

The next morning I was met with an empty bed, a ringing cell phone, and a heavy heart. I sat up, the thin sheets falling on to my lap, exposing my chest. I groaned, my head pounding, and my eyes swollen from all the tears. I leaned over, and grabbed my cell phone off the table, the screen instantly lighting up with six new text messages.

Ken-

Sorry I just left, I didn’t want to wake you up. I had first shift today. There’s a bottle of water and two Tylenols on the table for you, whenever you wake up shoot me a text, k? Help yourself to any food, and possibly clothing :P see you later.

Shayley ♥-

Jae, babe, where r u?

Shayley ♥-

Jaten, are u ok, where r u?

Shayley ♥-

Jaten, im worried about u, r u ok?

Shayley ♥-

Jaten Briseis Gallner, answer me, I’m fucking worried, and I’m at ur house, ur aunt said u ran out and she hasn’t seen u since. Call me pls, I need 2 know ur ok, pls Jae.

Shayley ♥-

Jaten, I’m sorry I didn’t come 2 u when u needed me, im sorry, pls ur scaring me, ur aunt, even Rayn. But pls if u don’t want 2 talk 2 me, I understand but pls call your aunt, maybe even call Rayn, (!@#-$#%-^%$#)I need 2 know ur safe. It’s tearing me into pieces, I luv u babe, with every fiber of my being, pls, just call some1, any1 and let them know ur safe. I LUV U.

I felt a breath hitch in my chest, and before I could control it, my eyes were pooling with tears, tears of utter remorse. My hands shook as I dialed Rayden’s number, I stopped half way through and dropped the phone onto my lap. I drug my quaking hand through my hair, and dialed all of Rayden’s number.

I held my phone against my ear, and I was eventually met with Rayden’s unsuspecting voice. “Hello?” She asked not sure of who was calling her so early in the morning.

“Rayden?”

I heard her suck a breath in, “Is this, Jaten?” She whispered.

I mumbled a quick yes, and she let out what I considered a sigh of relief. “Shayley’s worried.” Her voice became monotonous. “You should call him.”

I bawled into the receiver, “I need to talk to you, in person, please.”

I was met with no objection from Rayden, she asked for a time and a place.

“A half hour, the park.”

“Alright.”

I abruptly hung up, and fell back on to the pillow, my cried subsided, as I was faced with a new problem. Confessing to Rayden my guiltily enjoyed sin.