The stages of falling

We walked to the coffee shop in silence, i wasnt sure if it was comfortable or awkward, but it was silent.

'Is it weird having me back ?' at that moment a girl looked at him up and down and smiled a smile i would trade anything for. oli returned that smile.

'i forgot how hard it was, dating you'

He was silent and took my hand in his 'you mean being my girlfriend'

'Ha, i think you have to give me a few days before we use that word again. Your still in the testing stage'

He chuckled and seemed to accept my way of doing things.

The smell of coffee filled my lungs and I looked up at the menu feeling olis hand around my waist. I made eye contact with a familiar pair of eyes, Oliver.

He realized it was me and almost jumped over the counter, but thought better and used the counter door. He walked up to me with an apologetic look.

‘Nic im so sorry about last night’

‘Hey Oliver, that’s your name right? I don’t think Nicole wants to speak to you’

‘Oli’ I gave him a look of pure ice ‘order me a coffee and go sit at that table, please’ I squeezed his hand and let go. He walked away hesitating.

‘nic my friends told me what I did, and I feel like a complete twat, I hate drinking that much casue I always get like that, and im so sorry if I hurt you or made you do anything you didn’t want to. And that guy who hit me, I completely deserved it and-‘

‘Okay. Wow. Have you been practicing this speech ?’

He chuckled ‘In a way, yes’

‘All is forgiven’

‘Really? then would you care to escort me to the park again, this Saturday’

‘That’s more of an order than a question so I guess I don’t have a choice’

‘Sweet ill pick you up here at 3’

‘ill see you then’ I rolled me eyes and smiled.

I walked over to Oli grabbing my coffee. He stood holding his own coffee and grabbed my hand to sit me down.

Oli kept looking at me, he’d sneak glances he thought I couldn’t see, but I saw them clearly.
“Stop looking at me so much, its making me nervous”

“Sorry, I just miss you, that’s all”

“And you wana fuck me” I joked.

“What’s so wrong about that?” I knew he was serious.

“Hold it cowboy; I think we need to build a little trust first”

“Ok, but that doesn’t mean I don’t wanna-“

“Anything else guys?” Oliver came to the table saving me from an awkward explanation to oli.

“no thanks” I smiled.

“I feel bad for him” oli said.

“why?”

“Cause he doesn’t have you and he can’t, cause now I have you”

I rolled my eyes and a smile appeared on my lips.

“That was lame”

“It doesn’t matter, because I can bet you feel the same way” he joked. I stuck my tongue out at him and got up preparing to leave. He grabbed my hand and held it tightly on our way out.
A familiar car drove past and slowed to a stop right by the footpath we were walking on.

‘Nic! Need a lift ?’

I sighed ‘No thanks lee, me and oli wanna walk’

He looked from me to oli, then oli to me. He rolled his eyes and nodded driving away hastily.
‘He’ll get used to it, I promise’ I smiled and took his hand in mine.

When we got back to mine our hands were stiff from being in each other’s for so long, I slowly flexed my fingers, it was starting to get cold. He took my hands in his and warmed them.

‘Can I just ask you something?’

‘It depends….’

I quirked a brow at him.

‘I’m joking, okay ask away’ he held his hands up in defence.

‘Would you forgive me if I ever did what you did to me?’

A bit of silence while I thought‘I guess I would have to. Otherwise id be a hypocrite’ he seemed worried.

‘Don’t worry im not gonna go fuck people just cause I know you would have to forgive me. I won’t take your trust for granted’

‘I guess I should apologise for taking you for granted’

I sighed heavily ‘don’t. I’m sick of apologies’ I chuckled lightly

He pecked me on the lips lightly, and turned around to walk away. I stood there smiling. I counted. 5,4,3,2,1

He turned around, confirmed the coast clear and took me in a cuddle, he’s lips collided with mine and I smiled against his. He bit my lip playfully and I wrapped my arms around his neck. He pulled back; as he did that I took his beanie and ran round the back way.

‘Oi!’ he laughed

He followed me back to the yard and came through the trees to find me on the swing. He stopped and looked around at his once pleasant surroundings.

‘nic, what happened to this place?’

‘Dad left, mum works’ the swing creaked and the rusted chains shook as I swayed lightly in the wind. He was silent.

Our shadows cast long as the afternoon dawned on us. He came over and sat on the swing next to me. The overgrown plants lay dead along the picket fence; the shrivelled flowers lay brown and lifeless.

‘Please tell me the tree house is still okay..’

‘Come see for yourself’ I took his hand and led him to the tallest tree in my backyard, he looked up at the old tree house the stepladder was missing steps and the windows were nailed shut.

‘Dad didn’t want us going up after what happened’

‘That still makes my skin crawl’

‘It wasn’t your fault’ I rolled my eyes and sighed ‘how many times do I need to tell you that?’