I Don't Want You! Or Maybe I Do

That night was another night spent drinking with the boys. Mum had wanted to spend time with Belle. I was missing her like crazy.
"She's gonna be fine, Katie. Don't worry." Shaun kept assuring me.
"I know." I sighed. "I just miss her." Shaun hugged me, telling me to relax and have fun. Soon enough, I was relaxed as ever. Numerous empty bottles were scattered on the coffee table and the floor. Music was blasting from the speakers. Bradie was still sober however. He hadn't touched a drink. Not even one.
"You okay, Bradie?" I asked him, sitting beside him.
"Yeah, I'm fine. I'm just expecting a call is all." He told me.
"Sure?" He nodded.
"I'm fine, honestly." He assured me.
"Okay then."

The next time I looked over at him, he was talking on the phone. When he hung up, he walked over to Shaun and began talking.
"What do you reckon they're talking 'bout?" Andy slurred. I shrugged. Shaun then walked over to us as Bradie walked out the front door. Shaun kissed me quickly.
"Bradie has to go out, and wanted me to go with him. Will you be okay here?" He asked. I nodded, kissing him. I slipped my tongue into his mouth. We remained like this until we heard a car horn honk. Shaun sighed as he pulled away. "Bye." He said, turning around and walking out the door. I noticed that Andy had gone.
"Andy?" I called out. Andy walked out of the kitchen, two drinks in his hand. He passed me one before opening the other, beginning to drink it. I took the drink, said thank you, and drank too.

Soon enough we were laughing our heads off at basically nothing and dancing together. Andy's hands rested on my waist, just underneath my shirt. Not like I really noticed. My hands were resting on his chest. Andy stopped dancing,staring into my eyes. And that was when he kissed me. I wanted to pull away, to yell at him, to tell him it was wrong, to tell him I loved Shaun. But I didn't, I let him kiss me. And I kissed back. But what could I do; I was drunk! I hadn't even really realised what I was doing, especially when he lead me into the bedroom. We were both sitting on the bed. Andy kissed me, leaving a trail of kissed down my neck.
"Love you Kate." He mumbled against my skin. I pulled him close to me. He lay me down on the bed.

-- The next morning --

I woke up to a pair of arms around me, holding me close. But, it felt strange. I turned over to see Andy, snoring lightly. What the hell happened?! And then I remembered. I tried to crawl out of his grip, but it was no use.He pulled me closer to him. I felt him kiss my neck. He was awake.
"Andy, don't." I told him.
"What do you mean?"
"Don't. Don't kiss me. Don't touch me. Just, don't." I told him. He let go of me. I quickly threw on some clothes. He put his on from last night.
"So what? You're just gonna pretend it didn't happen?" He asked me, annoyance in his voice.
"I'm gonna try."
"But, Katie...I love you." He told me, standing close to me. Our noses were almost touching.
"Andy, I'm dating Shaun..." I pointed out.
"I know, but...it's not like he hasn't cheated on you."
"Two wrongs don't make a right. I love Shaun. I'm sorry Andy, but I do." Andy sighed. I thought he'd given up, until I felt his lips crash onto mine. I tried to push him away, but it didn't work.
"What the f*ck?" Shaun asked from the doorway. Andy pulled away.
"Shaun..." Andy started.
"Get out." Shaun told him, glaring at him. Andy nodded before quickly leaving. I felt so guilty about last night, I couldn't even look at Shaun. Tears stung my eyes.

Shaun walked over to me, putting his arms around me.
"Babe, you okay?" He asked. I nodded. He kissed my forehead.
"I'm not mad at you. He kissed you...right?" I nodded. "Then, what's wrong?" He asked.
"Nothing." I told him. He looked unsure, but nodded and dropped the subject. I heard my phone go off. It was on my bedside table. I went to grab it, but Shaun got to it before I could. "Hand it over, mister." I said, putting my hand out. He shook his head, before poking his tongue at me. He looked at my phone confused for a second.
"What do you have to tell me?" He asked. I took my phone, looking at the text I'd received: You better tell him, or else I will. It was from Andy. I sighed. I guess it would be better, in the end, if I told him the truth now...even if I didn't want to.
"Promise not to be mad?" I asked. He nodded.

"Well, after you left last night...Andy and I had a few more drinks, and...I swear I had no idea what I was doing! If I had've known, I never would've..." I assured him.
"Are you saying you and Andy...?" He started. He didn't have to finish, we both knew. I nodded, tears in my eyes.
"I'm so sorry." I apologised.
"Maybe it would've been better if you'd just left like your mother said." Shaun said.
"Shaun, I..." I started, reaching out to touch him, but he shook his head. I stopped. Tears now ran down my face.
"Maybe you should go. Stay with your mum." He said quietly. I nodded. He's just mad, that's all. I began to pack my things. Shaun had left the room. I felt sick. Sick with myself. Physically sick. Once I finished packing, I took my bags down stairs. Mum was waiting for me at the door. Shaun was sitting on the lounge, staring off into space. I placed my bags by the door and walked over, sitting beside him.

"I'm so sorry, I love you." I whispered in his ear before I kissed his cheek. He didn't say or do anything. I sighed as I walked back over to the door. I picked up my things and took them out to Mum's car, placing them in the boot. Shaun had snapped out of his trance, and was now sitting in the back seat with Belle.
"Goodbye." He said to her, kissing her forehead. I could see the tears in his eyes, the pain he was trying to hide. It hurt me to think that I'd caused that pain. He walked back inside without even looking at me. I got into the car, in the back with Belle, while Mum drove. I didn't talk the whole car ride. I didn't talk when we went inside. I didn't talk when I was unpacking. I didn't talk when Mum asked if I was okay. Not one word. I didn't eat dinner. I didn't do anything. I sat in my room, crying. I'd occasionally go outside when Belle cried.That was the only time I left my room all night. I didn't sleep. Not one wink. I tried to call Shaun. He didn't pick up. I tried to call Bradie, to get Shaun to talk to me, he didn't answer either. I didn't even try to call Andy. He was the last person I wanted to talk to. I just wanted everything to be okay again.