The Punchline to the Joke Is Asking

“Hey Jamie, we’re gonna be in NYC for a bit next week. Wanna do something?” I grinned into my cell phone when Jamie finally scrounged enough quarters to call. I’d made him promise to spend the cash I’d given him on food for himself, or calling Trey is he had to talk to one of us.
“Actually, yes.” I could tell Jamie was grinning as he outlined a vague plot for me.

“You love me, and you know it.” I grinned at Ryan, shoving him playfully as we walked down the path in Central park, carrying our guitars.
He looped an arm around my waist, pulling me into him as he nuzzled his face into my hair. “Yeah, I do.” He grinned. He confused the Hell out of me at moments like that; I couldn’t tell if he was messing with me or if he liked me or if he was planning on playing me…. I give up.
The two of us made our way to my old bench.
“This is it; home, sweet home.” I sighed affectionately, sinking down onto the worn, graffitied wood.
Ryan sighed, sliding over next to me.

“No, like this.” I repositioned his fingers to form the correct chord on his guitar, then put my hand back on the neck of my own acoustic. I started strumming the first few chords of ‘Smells Like Teen Spirit’ by Nirvana, and he copied me.
“Good.” I grinned, glancing at his face just in time for his hypnotic brown eyes to dart up to meet my blue ones. I froze, captivated for an instant, then shook myself out of it.
We kept on like that, playing and joking and flirting(?), until I heard footsteps coming down the path towards us, which was nothing new. Then I heard the familiar, distinctive tune being whistled between gapped teeth, and knew who it was.
I turned away from Ryan, grinning at Jamie, but he wasn’t alone.
There was a tall boy with long, black hair next to him. He was slim but built, with just a bit of fringed bangs hanging into his blue eyes.
I froze, my eyes widening, then I leapt off the bench, letting my over loved guitar fall to the ground for the first time since it came into my possession as I launched myself at the boy.
“Trey!” I screamed, latching onto him. Had it really been two years?
He fell backwards, taking me with him, and landed on the pavement with a slight grunt.
“Trey!” I repeated happily, burying my face in his chest as he stroked my hair.
“Cyn.” He sighed, equally elated.
“Trey, I missed you! How’ve you been? Where’ve you been? Do you visit Jamie a lot? He told me social services got you! Are you happy now?” I started with the questions, rapid-fire to make sure I got them out before I forgot them.
“Cyn, easy, girl.” Trey’s laughter rumbled through his chest as he sat up and kissed the top of my head. “I’ve missed you, too.”
I stood up, then hauled him up beside me. He was still a foot taller. After pouting for an instant, I dragged him over to Ryan, Jamie following as he chortled about the vivaciousness of youth.
“Ryan, this is Trey and Jamie. Guys, this is Ryan.” I chirped happily as I scooped my acoustic off the pavement. She’d collected a few new scrapes here and there, but only I would notice among the other marks of abuse love.
Ryan stood up and politely shook hands with my boys, and they started chatting a bit. Trey and I didn’t take long to break off and start our own conversation, in our special ghetto shorthand that only a street kid could ever hope to understand.

“Hey, Jamie hid a word or two, care to illuminate?” Trey raised and eyebrow at me, unsure if I even knew what Jamie had failed to mention when they’d last spoken.
“I’ll give it a whirl.” I crossed my arms, grinning crookedly.
“He said some guy, Pete, gave the OK for me to take a trip for a bit.” Trey shrugged. “Mom got the full deets, but I’m on strings.”
“Sounds like you’re coming with me and Ryan when we ditch NYC.” I said. If Pete had given Trey’s mom all the details about an extended trip and he was just being shoved along like a puppet on strings, it must have been a surprise for both of us. I could have seen that coming; Pete and Jamie were both wily bastards, and usually had a plot or two up their sleeves.

I was right, Jamie confirmed it when he sent Trey back with Ryan and I, all the way back to Chicago. On the plane, we were careful to include Ryan in our conversation because of how upset he seemed. He’d never really liked flying like I did, but it seemed like more than airsickness was getting to him.
Back in Chicago, Pete called the second the plane touched down and demanded we come over. He really had been plotting with Jamie.
Plotting to meet Trey.

“We’re here!” Ryan yelled, a little less than enthusiastic.
Absolutely everyone was inside; MCR, Fall Out Boy, Panic!, Gabe, and Bill.
I followed Ryan into the house, towing Trey by his slightly sweaty hand as we slowed, a bit unsure of the guys. I hadn’t felt so uneasy around them since the beginning.
“Guys, this is Trey.” I grinned brilliantly, my best, most perfect lie. “Trey, meet the boys.”
There was a chorus of mixed greetings; some awkward, some welcoming, some downright cold. Trey took it in stride, nodding easily as he grinned a hello.
I pulled him over to my usual spot on the couch, taking Bronx from Frankie on the way.
The two of us sat down together, our thighs crushed together to form a seat for the child, who we smiled at and played with. We were here because we had to be; of course we’d rather go catch up one-on-one, but this could be fun, too.
“So what’s it like in safety?” I asked, finally fed up with waiting to catch up. We could use our own language to hide in plain sight.
Trey shook his head. “We don’t have words for it.”
My eyes widened at that, and I gazed at him enviously, but honestly happy for him. If having a home, a family, was so good there were no words in our language of pain and fear and defiance, maybe it was something I should look into.
“Where’d you wind up, anyway?” I asked, after a moment of silence. We we were aware that Gerard, Pete, and Joe were listening in, but we were safe in our words.
“Square one.” Trey sighed, and I gasped.
“And you rolled the dice?” I couldn’t believe our little game of life had sent him back to where he’d started from and he’d chanced a new beginning there. He hadn’t given up or cheated across the board again.
“I gave it a shot.” Trey shrugged. Like me, he tended to roll with things. Unlike me, he couldn’t hold a grudge. Sometimes we were identical, and in some ways we were opposites. Some people in New York had taken to calling us ‘the mirrors’ or ‘looking glass’; because we were the same and inverted at the same time. Like a reflection in the mirror- it’s you, but not.
“And it was worth it.” I finished quietly, knowing, somehow.
Trey nodded.
“How’s… how are they, then?” I asked, slipping out of our language. It was hard for me to stick in one dialect, after two years away from it all.
“They’re alright. They missed me, that’s for sure.” Trey ran his hand through his hair, then shifted Bronx into his lap so he could focus on the little guy as he spoke. “I told them about you, in some ways.”
I nodded. “At least they know.” I whispered, looking down.