Danger Line

After seeing Whitney’s dress, I was measured for my dress. It only took fifteen minutes.

On the way back to my place, I decided to talk to Whitney about the dress. At a red light, I turned my body slightly towards her, letting her know that I wanted to chat.

“So, the bridesmaid dress is great,” I smiled sincerely. It really was great.

“You think so?” she grinned. “Thank you. I didn’t want to be one of those brides who got the ugly colors.”

We laughed together lightly.

“I just have a small problem,” I said slowly and her attention was full alert. “The back is shown and I… I was wondering if I could use a sash, shawl or anything to cover the back.” I was really hopeful I wouldn’t have to explain my reasoning.

Whitney just smiled. “Whatever you want, you know I’ll call the place and tell them to just cover your back, so you don’t have to get a sash.”

I would be forever thankful for Zacky getting someone as sweet as her. We got back to my home and I saw my mom’s car. I had called her to ask her if she could pick up Damien for me, and she said she could. Whitney helped me with my bags and we entered my home.

“Momma!” Damien came running straight towards me and wrapped his arms around my legs. “I missed you, mami!”

“I missed you too, baby,” I said and placed the bags aside and picked him up. I kissed his cheek several times. He giggled.

The girls and I said our goodbyes and I made sure to give Whitney an extra hard hug. I was very happy to have her as a friend. I went to greet my mother, who was in the kitchen making food, and then I went to my room with my bags to put my new clothes away. I took off the tags and tossed them in the trash can that was next to the nightstand. I took about half an hour to be done.

When I went back downstairs, Matt was with Damien in the living room helping him with his homework. I smiled at the sight of them. It filled my heart with joy to see them. Matt lifted his gaze like he sensed me or something. Our eyes locked and he gave me a small smile and I returned it.

“Momma!” Damien called out for me and I went and sat down next to Damien, so he was between Matt and me.

As Damien connected the dots to make a butterfly, I looked over to Matt.

“How was recording?” I asked genuinely curious.

“It went great. Jimmy wants you to come next time because he wants to talk to you about a song, and he won’t let anyone else pinch in. He wants you,” he said.

“I’ll give him a call and we’ll see when I can go,” I told him.

“All right,” he replied.

My father came over, and we had a big family dinner. I missed my mother’s cooking like a drug addict misses crack. I could never cook like her. She added that extra something to everything, and she said she would tell me when I was old enough. I remember sitting down in the cave in total darkness and I wondered what that extra could have been.

After dinner, my parents left and I allowed Damien an hour to play video games. I told him nothing violent. I was cleaning the dishes when I felt Matt’s presence.

“Hi,” I greeted him.

“Hey,” he responded, “how was your day out with the girls?”

“It was great,” I smiled. “Please remind me to thank Brian.”

He chuckled. “Of course. What did you and the girls do?”

“We went shopping and we went to Whitney’s fitting,” I explained. “Then we came back here. I…” I wasn’t sure if I should tell him, but I wanted to. “I invited Eli for lunch to discuss some personal things.”

I felt his body tense after my words. I turned off the faucet and removed the gloves. I turned my body towards him. His eyes were guarded and he had his arms crossed across his chest. It was his way of protecting himself. He didn’t change in the two years that I was gone.

“And?” he drawled out.

“I don’t want any secrets between us. I don’t want you to think that I slept with someone else, but Eli told me that I… sometimes did stuff… to him,” I said and I saw as Matt clenched his hands even though they were crossed. “We didn’t have intercourse, he promised me that.”

“And I’m supposed to fucking believe that?” he spat angrily.

“I know you’re upset, but I decided to tell you because I want a clean slate,” I told him and placed my finger to my lips telling him to keep it down. “And yes, you are supposed to believe that because Eli would not lie to me. I trust him with my life, Matt.”

Matt looked away. “I used to be the one you trusted with your life.”

I blinked in realization. “That’s… not what I meant…”

“I’m going to bed, can you shower Damien and put him to sleep?” he muttered coldly.

I nodded slowly. “Yes.”

Without as much as a hug, he turned around and walked away. I didn’t get why he was mad at me, but I knew I had to give him space. Matt had a temper, just like I remembered and I knew it was best to give him some time to think.

I finished washing the dishes, and at nine I told Damien it was time to go to sleep. I took him to the bathroom and I got him a bath and then I took him to his room. Again, he asked me to sing him to sleep, but I made some lame excuse and just read him Peter Pan.

When I was at the part of Never Land, he fell asleep. I kissed his head and lit up his night light. I stepped out of Damien’s room and looked down towards Matt’s. I went back to my own room. I closed the door behind me. I was mentally exhausted.

I really hoped sleep would come to me. The last thing I needed was to be sleep deprived.

Matt’s Point of View

I knew Kari had no control of what happened when she was asleep, but it angered me that she had so much faith in Eli. I used to have that faith. I used to be the one she used to trust her life on. She used to tell me, and now Eli was becoming that person she trusted the most.

I didn’t know what else to do.

I rubbed my face and then turned to my side to try to get some sleep. I had some more recording to do with the guys.

I did wonder if Kari was going to crawl into bed with me. I knew I wouldn’t be able to resist her if she crawled under the covers with me and touched me. I was always weak to her touch. I wouldn’t be able to push her away. I would embrace her and make sweet love to her.

But, the alarm went off and I was alone in bed.

I let the alarm continue making noise for about thirty seconds, and then I turned it off. I got out of bed and I showered and got dressed for the day. I went to Damien’s room to wake him up, but his bed was empty. That’s when I heard his laughter coming from downstairs, the kitchen.

I made my way to the kitchen and I saw Kari showing Damien when to flip the pancake. I smiled as I watched the scene before me. It was still unreal to have Kari back, to see her smile, and to hear her laughter. When she was gone, her laughter would haunt me. I thought I would hear her enter the room with her contagious laugh, but it was never her.

“Daddy! Look I made pancake!” Damien giggled and held out a plate of a burned pancake.

“Looks delicious, little man,” I said.

“Eat!” he thrust the plate forward.

I heard Kari giggle, and I sent a small glare towards her. She just smiled wider. I took the plate from Damien, and I went to the table and sat down. Damien followed me the whole way to make sure I would eat it.

“Well, I wouldn’t want to spoil what mommy has made for me,” I looked over to Kari for help.

“But I made for you,” Damien pouted and his eyes glistened.

Damn, I loved this kid too damn much. Maybe it was because he had the same pout of his mother, and I couldn’t deny that pout anything.

I poured syrup… lots and lots of syrup to the burned pancakes.

I watched Damien and he just looked really happy. I rolled the pancake like a fajita and then I carefully bit it. I chewed and then I swallowed it.

“So good,” I said after the first bite.

Damien grinned. “I’m a cook like mommy.”

“Go wash your hands and brush your teeth for school,” Kari told him. Damien started to run upstairs and Kari warned him to walk.

I placed the plate down on the table.

I heard Kari’s laugh, and I looked over to her trying not to laugh too hard.

“Did you enjoy that?” I asked seriously.

She wasn’t faced by my tone. I could never scare her. She never feared me, even when I lost my temper.

“I did. I did enjoy that,” she giggled. “But, you made your son happy, and that is what makes you a great father.”

Her words made me feel like I was flying. I settled back down to earth and remembered I was supposed to be upset with her.

“You’re coming to the studio with me?” I asked.

She nodded. “Jimmy wants me there.”

“Did you sleep well?” I asked.

She looked down at her feet and then she avoided my eyes. “A little. I got a couple of hours, maybe four.”

“It’s still not enough,” I said.

She smiled. It was that smile she gave me when she told me she could handle things.

“I’m fine,” she said.

“And I’m King of Spain,” I retorted. “We need to talk to Dr. Thomas that his sleeping pills didn’t work.”

“We are. When we go next time, we’ll tell him,” she said. “I’m going to go clean up around here. Could you make sure Damien is ready?”

“Sure,” I stood up and watched for a bit as she started to clean, and then I went to check on Damien.