I Love Your Switchblade Attitude

Harley looked up at the blank ceiling in front of her, taking in the dull eggshell color that washed across the surface.

Her mind raced, but she continued to lie still, cycling through her thoughts as she cast her hollow gaze towards the empty space above her. She was interrupted only when a soft knock brought her out of her thoughts, and she propped herself onto her elbows as the door creaked open.

A head of wheat-gold hair stuck its way into the room, followed by the petite body of Harley’s best friend. Harley smiled as Colie closed the door tenderly behind her, her feet padding softly against the worn carpet as she made her way towards the bed.

“You’re up.” Colie raised her eyebrows, turning her question into a statement as she lowered herself onto the bed, turning so that her body was parallel with Harley’s while she remained on her side.

“I’ve been up for a while.” Harley shrugged, realizing that she had yet to fall asleep after the encounter with Alex in the early hours of the morning.

She had fled to her room, where she sighed, turned the light off so that darkness engulfed her, and flopped down on the bed, only realizing that her thoughts had consumed the rest of her night when strips of light started pouring through the windows of her room.

Harley knew by the curious look in Colie’s eyes that she would have to explain what had happened, so she sighed and opened her mouth, before retelling the previous events of the day. Colie laughed at all the right places and swore loudly at others, before the story was over.

“That bastard.” Colie exclaimed finally, adding a colourful string of vocabulary afterwards, causing even Harley—who was quite foul-mouthed—to flinch. “We’re just going to have to ignore him from now on. We can give him the cold shoulder...oh! I know. We can do what we did last year to Beth Kingsley! Do you remember what we did after she spread that rumour about Katherine having that STD? We can do that...or we can egg his house or something!”

“I suppose.” Harley shrugged, attempting to appear nonchalant, even though her stomach continued to churn nervously and a nauseating feeling began to overwhelm her.

“Har?” Colie prodded her side, and Harley jumped, realizing that she had tuned out her friend as she continued to plot revenge. “You don’t want to do this, do you?”

“Of course I do.” Harley stated, though her force of agreement faltered as she began to think about whom she was trying to convince—Colie or herself.

“Oh, Harley...” Colie sounded sympathetic, and shook her head continuously. “You still love him, don’t you?”

“What?” Harley jumped slightly at the accusation, feeling her insides constrict and her throat become dry. She shook her head, sharply. “What? Of c-course I don’t. I never loved him. I thought—I thought I did last summer, but I was just young, stupid and naive. It was just a fling...it didn’t mean a thing.” Her words were strained as she attempted to make them sound believable, but she soon realized how pathetic she sounded.

“It’s worse than I thought.” Colie shook her head, looking at Harley as though she was an abused puppy. Harley cast her gaze downwards, feeling the blood rise to her cheeks as her heart thumped rapidly in her ears. “Now Harley,” Colie raised her eyebrows, “we both know that you can’t look me in the eyes and tell me that you did not fall in love with, and are not still in love with Alexander Gaskarth.”

“I’m not in love with him.” Harley muttered, looking at the lavender bedspread beneath her.

“Look me in the eyes and tell me that.” Harley brought her gaze upwards, her tawny eyes connecting with Colie’s ocean blue ones.

“I—” Harley closed her mouth as she thought it over, realizing that she couldn’t continue to lie to herself and her best friend.

She couldn’t get the words out even if she tried, as both girls knew that Harley was still head over heels in love with the boy who had broken her heart the previous summer. And there was nothing she could do about it.

“That’s what I thought.”

“I don’t even know what’s wrong with me, Colie.” Harley groaned, burying her head into the pillow in front of her, but quickly changing her mind and removing her face from the plush surface. “One minute, I’ve convinced myself that I hate him and he’s disgusting for what he did to me, but the next, I’m totally hypnotized or some shit by the way he smiles and how his eyes are the most remarkable shade of brown and how he is so genuine and nice, and my knees can’t help but buckle anytime he speaks.”

“It seems to me that you really like him.”

“It’s just stupid. One mean he can be so nice to me and desperate for me to like him and be ‘friends again’ and the next, he’s calling me a bitch.”

“He does curse a lot...but maybe that’s his way of keeping conversation, or like...showing you that he cares about you.”

“By calling me a bitch?”

“He obviously didn’t mean it. It seems as though he just wanted you to talk to him again. And if you like him...I think you should go for it.”

“He has Lisa, remember?” Harley rolled her eyes, “Even if I wanted to go for it...I can’t. I don’t want a repeat of last summer, and if I became the ‘other woman’ again, there are bound to be a couple of catfights.”

“There’s only one option, then...”

“Yeah?”

“You’re just going to have to move on.” Harley sighed, expecting the only option to be something along those lines.

Even if she wanted to move on, even if she forced herself not to think about Alex anymore, it would be impossible to move on, especially when Alex had left such a big impact on her life. She let out a breath, before shifting her body back under the sheets.

“What are you doing?” Colie asked, watching as Harley closed her eyes and inhaled slowly.

“Going back to sleep and hopefully not waking up.” Harley yawned, placing her hands at her sides. “Now get the fuck out.”

She blindly attempted to point at the door with her eyes clothes, but ended up pointing at the window. Harley expected the mattress to shift as Colie got up, but felt nothing. This was because Colie didn’t leave, and instead settled beside her.

“I mean it.” Harley moaned, feeling the familiar mood of exhaustion take over her senses.

Colie just laughed.

______________________

“Please explain to me why we are here.” Harley muttered, finding a trolley and pushing it towards the first aisle in sight. Zack and Colie chuckled at her misery, while Jack began poking her side. “What are you doing?” Harley snapped, while Jack giggled to himself.

Colie had gotten Harley up two hours later, something that made her very crabby, and said that she had to get ready. Harley had managed to throw on a stained white t-shirt and faded black pants before stumbling out the door.

Colie had looked at her in semi-disgust, but kept her mouth shut as they walked into the car. Now, Harley was disorientated as she was led into a brightly lit supermarket.

“I wanna ride in the troll-ey!” Jack laughed childishly, attempting to straddle the side of the cart to get in.

“Your fat ass isn’t mean to fit in here, Jack. Get the fuck out of it.” Jack whined out a complaint, but obliged and got out of the trolley, returning to walking beside her.

“We’re here to buy shit.” Zack stated, casting a sideways glance at Colie, who was busy looking at the label of a can of soup. He quickly returned his gaze to Harley, and blushed when she raised a questioning eyebrow. “Rian and Alex already bought shit for their house, but they forgot to take us along. We don’t let Jack shop by himself...well, the reasons are obvious there.”

Harley couldn’t help but laugh as Jack attempted to punch Zack’s shoulder, but ended up hurting his own hand.

“Fucking made of metal or some shit.” Jack muttered under his breath as he clutched his hand tenderly, causing the entire group to laugh.

Harley pushed the trolley farther into the aisle, and Zack started putting bread and condiments in the trolley. Jack put some sort of mystery sauce in as well, though it was immediately removed by Zack who sternly shook his head and made a disgusted face.

“Wait, Alex and Rian live together?” Colie questioned, clearly unsure about the situation.

“Yeah,” Zack nodded.

“Rian used to live there with his girlfriend Kara but they broke up and now he’s dating Cassadee from Hey Monday, but they don’t live together. And Alex, well, he and his...girlfriend,” Jack glanced at Harley, to see how she would react, “Lisa live together still.”

Harley attempted to process the news, though her mind got stuck on the idea of Lisa and Alex living together, Lisa and Alex eating together, Lisa and Alex showering together, Lisa and Alex sleeping together...

Harley shuddered at the thought.

She then realized that Kara and Rian were no longer a couple, and almost dropped the ketchup bottle she had just picked up.

“Wait, Kara and Rian are over?”

Harley wondered why she had not been informed. When had this happened? What happened? What went wrong?

She honestly thought those two would have gotten married. As though reading her mind, Zack began to speak.

“Yeah...you didn’t hear? They broke up in November. Shit, even my mom knows.”

Oh shit.

Harley began to panic, realizing that she and Rian’s once close relationship had deteriorated so much that he didn’t even tell her that he broke up with his girlfriend of seven years.

Harley shuddered, taking a mental note to fix things with Rian.

“So are Rian and...Cassandra...?” Colie narrowed her eyes, unsure.

“Cassadee...” Jack corrected.

“Rian and Cassadee—are they, like, serious?” Colie looked away for a moment, but looked back at Zack expectantly.

The fluorescent lighting made her skin paler than normal, and Harley could make out the faint rosy color of a blush coating her cheeks.

Her blue eyes were curious, and she was biting her lip. Colie was nervous.

Harley felt her stomach clench as she looked at Zack, who appeared confused.

“I guess,” He seemed to pause, unsure how to answer. “They’ve been dating for about six months, so...”

“Oh.” Colie had a crestfallen look on her face, causing Jack and Harley to exchange glances.

If this meant what Harley thought it meant, Colie was in big trouble.

A pregnant silence settled into the air, causing Harley to become nervous. Even Jack was unsure about what to say. Harley continued to push the trolley into the next isle, hoping that it would distract the group and eliminate awkwardness.

Instead, she managed to round the corner and bang right into someone. There was a loud crash, and someone was sent hurtling towards the floor, while his or her trolley was pushed backwards in impact.

“Oh shit.” Harley cried, hoping it wasn’t an old grandmother who would beat her with her purse when she heard someone cursing.

As Harley ran towards the victim that was sprawled across the shiny linoleum tile, she realized that the stranger was far from a grandmother.

In front of her stood a boy—no, a man—who resembled a god. He looked around their age, but seemed to have the confidence of a movie star.

The first thing that Harley noticed were piercing emerald green eyes staring back at her from below, shadowed slightly by a head of thick black curls.

The man-god stood, brushing himself off and looking up at her, flustered. The next thing Harley noticed was his outfit. He was wearing a long moss green sweater, even though it was well into the middle of June, and khaki pants.

The collar of what appeared to be a dress shirt peaked out the collar of the sweater, and Harley felt a weird urge to stroke the sweater. A gleaming silver watch remained strapped proudly on his left wrist, and a thin silver chain hung loosely off his neck.

Everything looked designer and expensive.

Harley felt poor and hideous in her stained and faded clothes. She tried to cover the bright orange stain screaming out on her shirt, wondering why she was so stupid to dress like that in public.

“Did you just hit me?” The man questioned, rubbing his head as he gave her the once-over. His eyes roamed from her head, meeting her eyes but not moving downward.

“Uh. Y-yeah. S-s-sorry about that. I-I uh, didn’t mean to, uh, do that.” He gave her a strange look. “Are you, um, okay?”

“Yeah,” He shrugged. “It’s no big deal. I’m considering not suing you.”

“What?!” Harley’s eyes widened. “I-I know I’m clumsy but if you could...if you could just not count this as abuse or something. I’m really sorry I didn’t mean, I mean, I didn’t f—”

“Uh, I’m kidding.” The man said, his mouth pulling downwards in a frown. He rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. “It was a joke.”

“Oh!” Harley exclaimed loudly, feeling even more stupid as the minutes passed by. The god in front of her gave her a small smile. “Right. A joke.”

“I—” He was cut off by Colie rounding the corner.

Her dull blue eyes brightened up at the sight of the man in front of Harley and as she approached, she raised her eyebrows at Harley suggestively. Harley felt like smacking the smirk off her face.

“Why, hello there.” Colie grinned flirtatiously.

“Hello.” The man said, pulling the trolley towards him.

“You know each other?” She questioned, gesturing between Harley and the man.

“No. Your friend just rammed into me a couple minutes ago.”

The man sounded unimpressed. Even when he was bored, he looked cute.

Damnit.

The one time Harley meets a cute guy other than Alex this year, he turns out to think she’s a stuttering imbecile who doesn’t possess the simple motor skills needed to control a shopping trolley.

“Well she tends to do that. Harley is just a charmer.” Colie smiles, nudging Harley, who in turn, sent her a death glare.

“Harley, huh?” His gaze returned to Harley, as she flushed a light red. “Like the motorcycle?”

“Yeah,” Usually Harley hated it when people associated her name with the motorcycle, but this man was an exception.

“I’m Maximilian Porter,” he said, and watched as Colie hid her laughter. “Yeah, I know. My parents are weird like that.” He turned to Harley and smiled. “But you can call me Max, if you want.”

“Okay, Max.” Harley smiled.

“So are you guys from here?” Max asked, one of his curls slipping near his eye. He quickly brushed it back.

“I am,” Harley said, glad that she was gaining more confidence talking with this beautiful stranger. “I’ve lived here most of my life. Colie’s from Colorado. She’s staying with me for the summer.”

“That’s cool.” Max smiled, causing Harley to smile back. “I’m from Maryland as well.” Harley was about to respond, to say something witty that would surely win him over, but was interrupted by a shrill, boyish squeal.

“JACK PUT THE SAUSAGES DOWN!” Zack’s deep voice trembled through the store, causing Harley to take an instinctive step towards her trolley, ready to come to the rescue if necessary.

“I DONT WANNA! I LIKE HOW THEY FEEL!” Jack’s laughter filled the air, causing many questions to race through Harley’s mind.

“We better go.” Colie groaned out, glancing between Max and Harley. Harley nodded.

“My friends seem to have gotten themselves in a predicament.” Harley rolled her eyes, but Max nodded understandingly.

“Maybe I’ll see you around?” He sent her a smile.

Harley wasn’t stupid. She knew the smile on his face was not one of politeness. It seemed almost unbelievable, but it seemed as though he was flirting with her.

“Definitely.” Harley smiled back, before taking her trolley, quickly committing the image of Max to memory, and walking into an aisle a few lanes over, followed by Colie.

“I spy Harley’s new boyfriend.” Colie sang aloud, in a high-pitched voice.

“No.” Harley looked down. “No, absolutely no. He doesn’t like me. I don’t like him. No. I messed up. No.”

“Say no one more time and you’ll be the most fucking negative person on the earth.” Colie rolled her eyes. “He likes you, you know.”

“I can’t, Colie.”

Instead of arguing, Colie rolled her eyes. Her blonde hair was pulled back in a high ponytail, and it swished back and forth as she moved her head. She shrugged, finally giving up on Harley and her negative attitude.

Instead, her deep blue eyes scanned the aisle for Jack and Zack, and found the two boys at the end of the aisle, frozen sausage links scattered all over the floor.

“He’s an option.” Colie said in a low voice so that the boys could not hear, finally, before speeding up towards the boys. “What happened here?” She called out them, and they both looked up startled, like deer caught in headlights.

“Zack’s being a dick.” Jack whined like a little child, laughing to himself with a goofy grin on his face. “I wanted to put the sausages up my pants and—”

“I don’t want to know.” Colie cut him off as she lifted her hand to indicate for him to stop talking. “I’m ready to go, are you, Harley?”

Harley wasn’t listening, but instead was trying to locate the head of curly black hair amongst the many rows of food.

She thought of Max, and how, even though he didn’t exactly give her butterflies, he was cute. He was nice. Most importantly, he showed an interest in her. Maybe it was time for her to move on...

“Harley?” Harley looked up to find Jack staring at her, confused.

She shook her head, clearing all thoughts she had about Max.

Feeling lightheaded from over thinking, Harley followed her friends towards the cashier hoping that, maybe, just maybe, she would see Max again.